SCENE I.
An inn yard at Rochester.
Enter a Carrier, with a lanthorn in his hand.
1 Car.
Heigh ho! An't be not four by the day,
I'll be hang'd: Charles' wain is over the new chimney,
and yet our horse not pack'd. What, ostler!
Ost. [within.]
Anon, anon.
1 Car.
I pr'ythee, Tom, beat Cut's6 note saddle, put a
few stocks in the point; the poor jade is wrung in the
withers 7 noteout of all cess.
Enter another Carrier.
2 Car.
Pease and beans are 8 noteas dank here as a dog,
and that is the next way to give poor jades the 9 note
bots:
this house is turn'd upside down, since Robin ostler
dy'd.
-- 293 --
1 Car.
Poor fellow! never joy'd since the price of
oats rose; it was the death of him.
2 Car.
I think, this be the most villainous house in
all London road for fleas: I am stung like a tench.9Q0672
1 Car.
Like a tench? by the mass, there is ne'er a
king in Christendom could be better bit than I have
been since the first cock.
2 Car.
Why, they will allow us9Q0673 ne'er a jourden,
and then we leak in your chimney; and your chamber-lie
breeds fleas 1 note
like a loach.
1 Car.
What, ostler! come away, and be hang'd,
come away.
2 Car.
I have a gammon of bacon, 2 note
and two razes
of ginger, to be delivered as far as Charing-cross.
-- 294 --
1 Car.
'Odsbody! the turkies in my pannier are
quite starv'd.—What, ostler!—A plague on thee! hast
thou never an eye in thy head? canst not hear? An
'twere not as good a deed as drink, to break the pate
of thee, I am a very villain.—Come, and be hang'd:—
Hast no faith in thee?
3 note
Enter Gads-hill.
Gads.
Good morrow, carriers. What's o'clock?
Car.
4 noteI think, it be two o'clock.
Gads.
I pr'ythee, lend me thy lanthorn, to see my
gelding in the stable.
1 Car.
Nay, soft, I pray ye; I know a trick worth
two of that, i'faith.
Gads.
I pr'ythee, lend me thine.
2 Car.
Ay, when, canst tell?—Lend me thy lanthorn,
quoth a?—marry, I'll see thee hang'd first.
Gads.
Sirrah carrier, what time do you mean to
come to London?
2. Car.
Time enough to go to bed with a candle, I
warrant thee.—Come, neighbour Mugges, we'll call
-- 295 --
up the gentlemen; they will along with company, for
they have great charge.
[Exeunt Carriers.
Enter Chamberlain.
Gads.
What, ho! chamberlain!
Cham.
5 note
At hand, quoth pick-purse.
Gads.
That's even as fair as—at hand, quoth the
chamberlain: for thou variest no more from picking
of purses, than giving direction doth from labouring;
thou lay'st the plot how.
Cham.
Good morrow, master Gads-hill. It holds
current, that I told you yesternight: There's a 6 notefranklin
in the wild of Kent, hath brought three hundred
marks with him in gold: I heard him tell it to one of
his company, last night at supper; a kind of auditor;
one that hath abundance of charge too, God knows
what. They are up already, and call for eggs and
butter7 note: They will away presently.
Gads.
Sirrah, if they meet not with 7 note
note, 1633: “I think yonder
come prancing down the hills from Kingston, a couple of St.
Nicholas's clarks.” Again, in The Hollander: “&lblank; to wit, divers
books, and St. Nicholas clarks.” Again, in A Christian turn'd
Turk, 1612:
&lblank; “We are prevented; &lblank;
“St. Nicholas's clerks are stepp'd up before us.”
Again, in The Hollander, a comedy by Glapthorne, 1640:
“Next it is decreed, that the receivers of our rents and customs,
to wit, divers rooks, and St. Nicholas clerks, &c.—under pain of
being carried up Holborn in a cart, &c.”
Steevens.
saint Nicholas'
clerks, I'll give thee this neck.
-- 296 --
Cham.
No, I'll none of it: I pr'ythee, keep that for
the hangman; for, I know, thou worship'st saint Nicholas
as truly as a man of falshood may.
Gads.
What talk'st thou to me of the hangman?
if I hang, I'll make a fat pair of gallows: for, if I
hang, old sir John hangs with me; and, thou know'st,
he's no starveling. Tut! there are other Trojans9 note that
thou dream'st not of, the which, for sport sake, are
content to do the profession some grace; that would,
if matters should be look'd into, for their own credit
sake, make all whole. 1 noteI am join'd with no foot
land-rakers, no long-staff, six-penny strikers2 note
; none of
-- 297 --
these mad, mustachio, purple-hu'd malt-worms3 note: but
with nobility, and tranquillity; 4 note
burgomasters, and
-- 298 --
great oneyers; such as can hold in; 5 note
such as will
strike sooner than speak, and speak sooner than
-- 299 --
drink, and drink sooner than pray: And yet I lie; for
they pray continually unto their saint, the commonwealth;
or, rather, not pray to her, but prey on her;
for they ride up and down on her, and make her their
boots.
Cham.
What, the common-wealth their boots? will
she hold out water in foul way?
Gads.
6 noteShe will, she will; justice hath liquor'd
her. We steal as in a castle7 note
, cock-sure; 8 note
we have the
receipt of fern-seed, we walk invisible.
-- 300 --
Cham.
Nay, by my faith; I think, you are more beholden
to the night, than to fern-seed, for your walking
invisible.
Gads.
Give me thy hand: thou shalt have a share
in our purchase9 note
, as I am a true man.
Cham.
Nay, rather let me have it, as you are a
false thief.
Gads.
Go to; 1 noteHomo is a common name to all
men.—Bid the ostler bring my gelding out of the
stable. Farewel, you muddy knave.
[Exeunt.
Samuel Johnson [1778], The plays of William Shakspeare. In ten volumes. With the corrections and illustrations of various commentators; to which are added notes by Samuel Johnson and George Steevens. The second edition, Revised and Augmented (Printed for C. Bathurst [and] W. Strahan [etc.], London) [word count] [S10901].
