SCENE IV.
Dr. Caius's house.
Enter Mrs. Quickly, Simple, and John Rugby.
Quic.
What; John Rugby!—I pray thee, go to
the casement, and see if you can see my master,
master Doctor Caius, coming: if he do, i'faith,
and find any body in the house, here will be an old
abusing of God's patience, and the king's English.
Rug.
I'll go watch.
[Exit Rugby.
Quic.
Go; and we'll have a posset for't soon at
night, in faith, 7 noteat the latter end of a sea-coal fire.
An honest, willing, kind fellow, as ever servant
shall come in house withal; and, I warrant you, no
tell-tale, nor no breed-bate8 note
: his worst fault is, that
-- 248 --
he is given to prayer; he is something peevish9 note that
way:9Q0121 but no body but has his fault;—but let that
pass. Peter Simple, you say your name is?
Sim.
Ay, for fault of a better.
Quic.
And master Slender's your master?
Sim.
Ay, forsooth.
Quic.
Does he not wear a great round beard, like
a glover's paring-knife?
Sim.
No, forsooth: he hath but 1 note
a little wee
face, with a little yellow beard; 2 note
a Cain-colour'd
beard.
-- 249 --
Quic.
A softly-sprighted man, is he not?
Sim.
Ay, forsooth: but he is as tall a man of his
hands3 note
, as any is between this and his head; he hath
fought with a warrener.
Quic.
How say you?—oh, I should remember
him; Does he not hold up his head, as it were? and
strut in his gait?
Sim.
Yes, indeed, does he.
Quic.
Well, heaven send Anne Page no worse fortune!
Tell master parson Evans, I will do what I can
for your master: Anne is a good girl, and I wish—
Re-enter Rugby.
Rug.
Out, alas! here comes my master.
-- 250 --
Quic.
We shall all be shent4 note
: Run in here, good
young man; go into this closet. [Shuts Simple in the
closet.] He will not stay long.—What, John Rugby!
John, what, John, I say!—Go, John, go enquire
for my master; I doubt, he be not well, that he
comes not home:—and down, down, a-down-a5 note, &c.
[Sings.
Enter Doctor Caius6 note.
Caius.
Vat is you sing? I do not like dese toys;
Pray you, go and vetch me in my closet 7 note
un boitier
verd; a box; a green-a box; Do intend vat I speak?
a green-a box.
Quick.
Ay, forsooth, I'll fetch it you.
I am glad he went not in himself: if he had found
the young man, he would have been horn-mad.
[Aside.
Caius.
Fe, fe, fe, fe! ma foi, il fait fort chaud. Je
m'en vai àa la Cour,—la grande affaire.
-- 251 --
Quic.
Is it this, Sir.
Caius.
Ouy; mettez le au mon pocket; Depêchez,
quickly:—Vere is dat knave Rugby?
Quic.
What, John Rugby! John!
Rug.
Here, Sir.
Caius.
You are John Rugby, and you are Jack
Rugby: Come, take-a your rapier, and come after
my heel to de court.
Rug.
'Tis ready, Sir, here in the porch.
Caius.
By my trot, I tarry too long:—Od's me!
Qu'ay j'oubliè? dere is some simples in my closet,
dat I vill not for the varld I shall leave behind.
Quic.
Ah me! he'll find the young man there, and
be mad.
Caius.
O diable, diable! vat is in my closet?—Villaine,
Larron! Rugby, my rapier.
[Pulls Simple out of the closet.
Quic.
Good master, be content.
Caius.
Verefore shall I be content-a?
Quic.
The young man is an honest man.
Caius.
Vat shall de honest man do in my closet?
dere is no honest man dat shall come in my closet.
Quic.
I beseech you, be not so flegmatic; hear
the truth of it. He came of an errand to me from
parson Hugh.
Caius.
Vell.
Sim.
Ay, forsooth, to desire her to—
Quic.
Peace, I pray you.
Caius.
Peace-a your tongue:—Speak-a your tale.
Sim.
To desire this honest gentlewoman, your
maid, to speak a good word to mistress Anne Page
for my master in the way of marriage.
Quic.
This is all, indeed-la; but I'll never put my
finger in the fire, and need not.
Caius.
Sir Hugh send-a you?—Rugby baillez me
some paper: Tarry you a little while.
Quic.
I am glad he is so quiet: if he had been thoroughly
moved, you should have heard him so loud,
-- 252 --
and so melancholy;—But notwithstanding, man, I'll
do for your master what good I can: and the very
yea and the no is, the French Doctor, my master,—I
may call him my master, look you, for I keep his
house; and I wash, wring, brew, bake, scour, dress
meat and drink, make the beds, and do all myself.
Sim.
'Tis a great charge, to come under one body's
hand.
Quic.
Are you avis'd o' that? you shall find it a
great charge: And to be up early, and down late;—
but notwithstanding, (to tell you in your ear; I
would have no words of it) my master himself is in
love with mistress Anne Page: but, notwithstanding
that,—I know Anne's mind,—that's neither
here nor there.
Caius.
You jack'nape; give-a dis letter to Sir
Hugh; by gar, it is a shallenge: I vill cut his throat
in de park; and I vill teach a scurvy jack-a-nape
priest to meddle or make:—you may be gone; it
is not good you tarry here:—by gar, I will cut all
his two stones; by gar, he shall not have a stone to
trow at his dog.
[Exit Simple.
Quic.
Alas, he speaks but for his friend.
Caius.
It is no matter-a for dat:—do you not
tell-a me dat I shall have Anne Page for myself?—
by gar, I vill kill de jack priest; and I have appointed
mine host of de Jarterre to measure our weapon;
—by gar, I vill myself have Anne Page.
Quic.
Sir, the maid loves you, and all shall be
well: we must give folks leave to prate: What, the
goujere8 note
!
Caius.
Rugby, come to the court vit me;—By
-- 253 --
gar, if I have not Anne Page, I shall turn your head
out of door:—Follow my heels, Rugby.
[Ex. Caius and Rugby.
Quic.
You shall have An fools-head9Q0123 of your own.
No, I know Anne's mind for that: never a woman
in Windsor knows more of Anne's mind than I
do; nor can do more than I do with her, I thank
heaven.
Fent. [Within.]
Who's within there, ho?
Quic.
Who's there, I trow? come near the house,
I pray you.
Enter Mr. Fenton.
Fent.
How now, good woman; how dost thou?
Quic.
The better that it pleases your good worship
to ask.
Fent.
What news? how does pretty mistress Anne?
Quic.
In truth, Sir, and she is pretty, and honest,
and gentle; and one that is your friend, I can tell
you that by the way, I praise heaven for it.
Fent.
Shall I do any good, thinkest thou? shall I
not lose my suit?
Quic.
Troth, sir, all is in his hands above: but
notwithstanding, master Fenton, I'll be sworn on a
book, she loves you:—Have not your worship a
wart about your eye?
Fent.
Yes, marry, have I; what of that?
Quic.
Well, thereby hangs a tale;—good faith,
it is such another Nan;—but I detest, an honest
maid as ever broke bread9Q0124:—We had an hour's talk
of that wart;—I shall never laugh but in that maid's
company!—But, indeed, she is given too much to
allicholly and musing: But for you—Well—go to.
Fent.
Well, I shall see her to-day: Hold, there's
money for thee; let me have thy voice in my behalf:
if thou seest her before me, commend me—
Quic.
Will I? ay, faith, that we will: and I will
-- 254 --
tell your worship more of the wart, the next time we
have confidence; and of other wooers.
Fent.
Well, farewell; I am in great haste now.
[Exit.
Quic.
Farewell to your worship.—Truly, an honest
gentleman; but Anne loves him not; I know
Anne's mind as well as another does:—Out upon't!
what have I forgot?
[Exit.
Samuel Johnson [1778], The plays of William Shakspeare. In ten volumes. With the corrections and illustrations of various commentators; to which are added notes by Samuel Johnson and George Steevens. The second edition, Revised and Augmented (Printed for C. Bathurst [and] W. Strahan [etc.], London) [word count] [S10901].