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Melville, Herman, 1819-1891 [1849], Mardi and a voyage thither, volume 1 (Harper & Brothers, New York) [word count] [eaf275v1].
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CHAPTER LXXXI. WHEREIN BABBALANJA RELATES THE ADVENTURE OF ONE KARKEKE IN THE LAND OF SHADES.

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At our morning repast on the second day of our stay in
the hollow, our party indulged in much lively discourse.

“Samoa,” said I, “those isles of yours, of whose beauty
you so often make vauntful mention, can those isles, good
Samoa, furnish a valley in all respects equal to Willamilla?”

Disdainful answer was made, that Willamilla might be
endurable enough for a sojourn, but as a permanent abode,
any glen of his own natal isle was unspeakably superior.

“In the great valley of Savaii,” cried Samoa, “for every
leaf grown here in Willamilla, grows a stately tree; and
for every tree here waving, in Savaii flourishes a goodly
warrior.”

Immeasurable was the disgust of the Upoluan for the
enervated subjects of Donjalolo; and for Donjalolo himself;
though it was shrewdly divined, that his annoying reception
at the hands of the royalty of Juam, had something to do
with his disdain.

To Jarl, no similar question was put; for he was sadly
deficient in a taste for the picturesque. But he cursorily
observed, that in his blue-water opinion, Willamilla was
next to uninhabitable, all view of the sea being intercepted.

And here it may be well to relate a comical blunder on
the part of honest Jarl; concerning which, Samoa, the
savage, often afterward twitted him; as indicating a rusticity,
and want of polish in his breeding. It rather originated,
however, in his not heeding the conventionalities of the
strange people among whom he was thrown.

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The anecdote is not an epic; but here it is.

Reclining in our arbor, we breakfasted upon a marble
slab; so frost-white, and flowingly traced with blue veins,
that it seemed a little lake sheeted over with ice: Diana's
virgin bosom congealed.

Before each guest was a richly carved bowl and gourd,
fruit and wine freighted; also the empty hemisphere of a
small nut, the purpose of which was a problem. Now,
King Jarl scorned to admit the slightest degree of underbreeding
in the matter of polite feeding. So nothing was a
problem to him. At once reminded of the morsel of Arvaroot
in his mouth, a substitute for another sort of sedative
then unattainable, he was instantly illuminated concerning
the purpose of the nut; and very complacently introduced
each to the other; in the innocence of his ignorance making
no doubt that he had acquitted himself with discretion; the
little hemisphere plainly being intended as a place of temporary
deposit for the Arva of the guests.

The company were astounded: Samoa more than all.
King Jarl, meanwhile, looking at all present with the utmost
serenity. At length, one of the horrified attendants, using
two sticks for a forceps, disappeared with the obnoxious nut,
Upon which, the meal proceeded.

This attendant was not seen again for many days; which
gave rise to the supposition, that journeying to the sea-side,
he had embarked for some distant strand; there, to bury
out of sight the abomination with which he was freighted.

Upon this, his egregious misadventure, calculated to do
discredit to our party, and bring Media himself into contempt,
Babbalanja had no scruples in taking Jarl roundly to
task. He assured him, that it argued but little brains to
evince a desire to be thought familiar with all things; that
however desirable as incidental attainments, conventionalities,
in themselves, were the very least of arbitrary trifles;
the knowledge of them, innate with no man. “Moreover,
Jarl,” he added, “in essence, conventionalities are but

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mimickings, at which monkeys succeed best. Hence, when you find
yourself at a loss in these matters, wait patiently, and mark
what the other monkeys do: and then follow suit. And by
so doing, you will gain a vast reputation as an accomplished
ape. Above all things, follow not the silly example of the
young spark Karkeke, of whom Mohi was telling me. Dying,
and entering the other world with a mincing gait, and
there finding certain customs quite strange and new; such
as friendly shades passing through each other by way of a
salutation;—Karkeke, nevertheless, resolved to show no sign
of embarrassment. Accosted by a phantom, with wings
folded pensively, plumes interlocked across its chest, he off
head; and stood obsequiously before it. Staring at him for
an instant, the spirit cut him dead; murmuring to itself,
“Ah, some terrestrial bumpkin, I fancy,” and passed on
with its celestial nose in the highly rarified air. But silly
Karkeke undertaking to replace his head, found that it
would no more stay on; but forever tumbled off; even in
the act of nodding a salute; which calamity kept putting
him out of countenance. And thus through all eternity is
he punished for his folly, in having pretended to be wise,
wherein he was ignorant. Head under arm, he wanders
about, the scorn and ridicule of the other world.”

Our repast concluded, messengers arrived from the prince,
courteously inviting our presence at the House of the Morning.
Thither we went; journeying in sedans, sent across
the hollow, for that purpose, by Donjalolo.

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Melville, Herman, 1819-1891 [1849], Mardi and a voyage thither, volume 1 (Harper & Brothers, New York) [word count] [eaf275v1].
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