Fab.

More matter for a May morning.

Sir And.

Here's the challenge, read it: I warrant there's vinegar and pepper in't.

Fab.

Is't so sawcy?

Sir And.

Ay, is't? I warrant him: do but read.

Sir To.
Give me. [Sir Toby reads.
Youth, whatsoever thou art, thou art but a scurvy fellow.

Fab.

Good and valiant.

Sir To.

Wonder not, nor admire not in thy mind why I do call thee so, for I will shew thee no reason for't.

Fab.

A good note, that keeps you from the blow of the law.

Sir To.

Thou com'st to the lady Olivia, and in my sight she uses thee kindly; but thou liest in thy throat, that is not the matter I challenge thee for.

Fab.

Very brief, and exceeding good sense-less.

Sir To.

I will way-lay thee going home, where if it be thy chance to kill me—

Fab.

Good.

Sir To.

Thou kill'st me like a rogue and a villain.

Fab.

Still you keep o'th' windy side of the law: good.

Sir To.

Fare thee well, and God have mercy upon one of our souls: he may have mercy upon mine, but my hope is better, and so look to thy self. Thy friend as thou usest him, and thy sworn enemy, Andrew Ague-cheek.

Sir To.

If this letter move him not, his legs cannot: I'll give't him.

Mar.

You may have very fit occasion for't: he is now in some commerce with my lady, and will by and by depart.

Sir To.

Go, Sir Andrew, scout me for him at the corner of the orchard like a bum-baily; so soon as ever thou seest him, draw; and as thou draw'st, swear horribly; for it comes to pass oft, that a terrible oath, with a swaggering accent sharply twang'd off, gives manhood more approbation than ever proof it self would have earn'd him. Away.

Sir And.

Nay, let me alone for swearing.

Sir To.

Now will not I deliver his letter; for the behaviour of the young gentleman gives him out to be of good capacity and breeding; his imployment between his lord and my neice confirms no less; therefore this letter being so excellently ignorant, will breed no terror in the youth; he will find that it comes from a clod-pole. But, Sir, I will deliver his challenge by word of mouth, set upon Ague-cheek a notable report of valour, and drive the gentleman, as I know his youth will aptly receive it, into a most hideous opinion of his rage, skill, fury, and impetuosity. This will so fright them both, that they will kill one another by the look, like cockatrices.

Previous section

Next section