Jaques at a Distance, observing them.
Clo.
Come apace, good Audrey; I will fetch up your
goats, Audrey: And how, Audrey? am I the man yet?
Doth my simple feature content you?
Aud.
Your features! (Lord warrant us!) what features?
Clo.
I am here with thee and thy goats, as the most
capricious poet, honest Ovid, was among the Goths.
&clquo;Jaq.
&clquo;O knowledge ill-inhabited! worse than Jove14Q0317
in a thatch'd house.&crquo;
Clo.
When a man's verses cannot be understood, nor
a man's good wit seconded with the forward child, understanding,
it strikes a man more dead than a great
reck'ning in a little room:—Truly, I would the gods
had made thee poetical.
-- 56 --
Aud.
I do not know what poetical is: Is it honest in
deed, and word? Is it a true thing?
Clo.
No, truly; for the truest poetry is the most
feigning; and lovers are given to poetry; and what they
swear in poetry, may be said, as lovers, they do feign.
Aud.
Do you wish then, that the gods had made me
poetical?
Clo.
I do, truly: for thou swear'st to me, thou art
honest; now, if thou wert a poet, I might have some
hope thou didst feign.
Aud.
Would you not have me honest?
Clo.
No, truly, unless thou wert hard-favour'd: for
honesty coupl'd to beauty, is to have honey a sauce to
sugar.
&clquo;Jaq.
&clquo;A material fool!&crquo;
Aud.
Well, I am not fair; and therefore I pray the
gods make me honest.
Clo.
Truly, and to cast away honesty upon a foul
slut, were to put good meat into an unclean dish.
Aud.
I am not a slut; though, I thank the gods, I am
foul.
Clo.
Well, praised be the gods for thy foulness; sluttishness
may come hereafter. But be it as it may be, I
will marry thee: and to that end, I have been with sir
Oliver Mar-text, the vicar of the next village; who hath
promis'd to meet me in this place of the forest, and to
couple us.
&clquo;Jaq.
&clquo;I would fain see this meeting&crquo;.
Aud.
Well, the gods give us joy!
Clo.
Amen. A man may, if he were of note a fearful
heart, stagger in this attempt; for here we have no temple
but the wood, no assembly but horn-beasts. But what
-- 57 --
though? Courage! as horns are odious, they are necessary.
It is said,—Many a man knows no end of his goods:
right; many a man has good horns, and knows no end
of them. Well, that is the dowry of his wife; 'tis none
of his own getting. Horns? Even so: Poor men alone?
No, no; the noblest deer hath them as huge as the rascal.
Is the single man therefore blessed? No: as a wall'd
town is more worthier than a village, so is the forehead
of a marry'd man more honourable than the bare brow
of a batchelor: and by how much defence is better than
no skill, by so much is a horn more precious than to
want.
Enter Sir Oliver Mar-text.
Here comes sir Oliver:—Sir Oliver Mar-text, you are
well met: Will you dispatch us here under this tree, or
shall we go with you to your chapel?
Sr. O.
Is there none here to give the woman?
Clo.
I will not take her on gift of any man.
Sr. O.
Truly, she must be given, or the marriage is
not lawful.
Jaq.
Proceed, proceed; I'll give her.
Clo.
Good even, good Mr. What d'ye call't: How
do you, sir? You are very well met: God'ild you for
your last company: I am very glad to see you: Even a
toy in hand here, sir:—Nay, pray be cover'd.
Jaq.
Will you be marry'd, motley?
Clo.
As the ox hath his bough, sir note,14Q0318 the horse his curb,
and the faulcon her bells, so man hath his desires; and
as pigeons bill, so wedlock would be nibling.
Jaq.
And will you, being a man of your breeding,
be marry'd under a bush, like a beggar? Get you to
church, and have a good priest that can tell you what
-- 58 --
marriage is: this fellow † will but join you together as
they join wainscot; then one of you will prove a shrunk
pannel, and, like green timber, warp, warp.
&clquo;Clo.
&clquo;I am not in the mind but I were better to
be marry'd of him than of another: for he is not like
to marry me well; and not being well marry'd, it
will be a good excuse for me hereafter to leave my
wife.&crquo;
Jaq.
Go thou with me, and let me counsel thee.
Clo.
Come, sweet Audrey;
We must be marry'd, or we must live in bawdry.—
Farewel, good Mr. Oliver:
Not, o sweet Oliver,14Q0319
O brave Oliver,
Leave me not behind thee;
But wind away,
Begone, note I say,
I will not to wedding with thee.
[Exeunt Jaques, Clown, and Audrey.
Sr. O.
'Tis no matter; ne'er a fantastical knave of them
all shall flout me out of my calling.
[Exit.
Edward Capell [1767], Mr William Shakespeare his comedies, histories, and tragedies, set out by himself in quarto, or by the Players his Fellows in folio, and now faithfully republish'd from those Editions in ten Volumes octavo; with an introduction: Whereunto will be added, in some other Volumes, notes, critical and explanatory, and a Body of Various Readings entire (Printed by Dryden Leach, for J. and R. Tonson [etc.], London) [word count] [S10601].
