Launce, meeting.
Spe.
Launce! by mine honesty, welcome to Milan. note14Q0036
Lau.
Forswear not thyself, sweet youth; for I am not
welcome. I reckon this always—That a man is never undone,
'till he be hang'd; nor never welcome to a place, 'till
some certain shot be pay'd, and the hostess say, welcome.
Spe.
Come on, you mad-cap, I'll to the ale-house
with you presently; where, for one shot of five pence,
thou shalt have five thousand welcomes. But, sirrah, how
did thy master part with madam Julia?
Lau.
Marry, after they clos'd in earnest, they parted
very fairly in jest.
Spe.
But shall she marry him?
Lau.
No.
Spe.
How then? shall he marry her?
Lau.
No, neither.
Spe.
What, are they broken?
Lau.
No, they are both as whole as a fish.
Spe.
Why then, how stands the matter with them?
Lau.
Marry, thus; when it stands well with him, it
stands well with her.
-- 32 --
Spe.
What an ass art thou? I understand thee not.
Lau.
What a block art thou, that thou can'st not?
my staff understands me.
Spe.
What thou say'st?
Lau.
Ay, and what I do too: look thee, I'll but lean,
and my staff understands me.
Spe. note
It stands under thee, indeed.
Lau.
Why, stand-under and under-stand is all one.
Spe.
But, tell me true, will't be a match?
Lau.
Ask my dog: if he say, ay, it will; if he say,
no, it will; if he shake his tail, and say nothing, it will.
Spe.
The conclusion is then, that it will.
Lau.
Thou shalt never get such a secret from me, but
by a parable.
Spe.
'Tis well, that I get it so. But Launce, how say'st
thou, that my master is become a notable lover?
Lau.
I never knew him otherwise.
Spe.
Than how?
Lau.
A notable lubber, as thou reportest him to be.
Spe.
Why, thou whorson ass, thou mistak'st me.
Lau.
Why, fool, I meant not thee; I meant thy master.
Spe.
I tell thee, my master is become a hot lover.
Lau.
Why, I tell thee, I care not though he burn
himself in love. If thou wilt go with me to the ale-house,
so; note if not, thou art an Hebrew, a Jew, and not
worth the name of a christian.
Spe.
Why?
Lau.
Because thou hast not so much charity in thee
as to go to the ale with note a christian: Wilt thou go?
Spe.
At thy service.
[Exeunt.
Edward Capell [1767], Mr William Shakespeare his comedies, histories, and tragedies, set out by himself in quarto, or by the Players his Fellows in folio, and now faithfully republish'd from those Editions in ten Volumes octavo; with an introduction: Whereunto will be added, in some other Volumes, notes, critical and explanatory, and a Body of Various Readings entire (Printed by Dryden Leach, for J. and R. Tonson [etc.], London) [word count] [S10601].
