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ON reflection, it seemed adviseable to the Captain
to write an answer to the card which Colonel or
Major Jacko, or whatever his title may have been,
had sent him this morning. It was as follows:

Sir,

I have two objections to this duel matter.
The one is, lest I should hurt you; and the other is,
lest you should hurt me. I do not see any good it
would do me to put a bullet through any part of your
body. I could make no use of you when dead, for
any culinary purpose, as I would a rabbit or a turkey.
I am no cannibal to feed on the flesh of men.
Why then shoot down a human creature, of which
I could make no use. A buffaloe would be better
meat. For though your flesh might be delicate and
tender; yet it wants that firmness and consistency
which takes and retains salt. At any rate it would
not be fit for long sea voyages. You might make a
good barbecue, it is true, being of the nature of a
racoon or an opossum; but people are not in the habit
of barbecuing any thing human now. As to your
hide, it is not worth the taking off, being little better
than that of a year old colt.

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It would seem to me a strange thing to shoot at a
man that would stand still to be shot at; in as much
as I have been heretofore used to shoot at things flying,
or running, or jumping. Were you on a tree
now, like a squirrel, endeavouring to hide yourself
in the branches, or like a racoon, that after much
eyeing and spying I observe at length in the crotch
of a tall oak, with boughs and leaves intervening, so
that I could just get a sight of his hinder parts, I
should think it pleasurable enough to take a shot at
you. But as it is, there is no skill or judgment requisite
either to discover or take you down.

As to myself, I do not much like to stand in the
way of any thing that is harmful. I am under apprehensions
you might hit me. That being the
case, I think it most advisable to stay at a distance.
If you want to try your pistols, take some object, a
tree or a barn door about my dimensions. If you
hit that, send me word, and I shall acknowledge that
if I had been in the same place, you might also have
hit me.

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