Welcome to PhiloLogic |
home | the ARTFL project | download | documentation | sample databases | |
Landon, Melville D. (Melville De Lancey), 1839-1910 [1872], Saratoga in 1901: fun, love, society & satire. Illustrated with 200 photo-etchings by Arthur Lumley. (Sheldon & Company, New York) [word count] [eaf628T]. To look up a word in a dictionary, select the word with your mouse and press 'd' on your keyboard.
My old friend Josh Billings arrived yesterday, and it did me Josh Billings is a kuss, and I like to be with him. He has
“Mr. Billings, where were you educated?” “Pordunk, Pennsylvania.” “How old are you?” “I was born 150 years old—and have been growing young “Are you married?” “Once.” “How many children have you?” “Doublets.” “What did you come to Saratoga for?” “I kan't tel. Kin you?” “What other vices have you?” “None.” “Have you any virtues?” “Several.” “What are they?” “I left them in New York.” “Do you gamble?” “When I feel good.” “What is your profession?” “Agriculture and alminaxing.” “What do you think of an interviewer?” “He's a leetle worse than an organ-grinder.” “How do you account for your deficient knowledge in spelling?” “Bad spells during infancy, and poor memory.” “What things are you the most liable to forget?” “Sermons and debts.” “What professions do you like best?” “Auctioneering, base-ball, and theology.” “Do you smoke?” “Thank you, I'll take a Partaga first.”
“What is your worst habit?” “The coat I got last in Poughkeepsie.” “What do you think of Grant?” “I am in favor of the PRESENT administration.” “Who is the best man in the Ring?” “Dan Rice.” “Worst man?” “Tweed—as far as heard from.” “What are your favorite books?” “My alminack and Commodore Vanderbilt's pocketbook.” “What is your favorite piece of sculpture?” “The mile stone nearest home.” “What is your favorite animal?” “The mule.” “Why?” “Because he never blunders with his heels.” “What was the best thing said by our old friend Artemus “All the pretty girls in Utah marry young.” “What do you think of the San Domingo question?” “If it don't interfere with the Santa Cruz (rum) question I'm “What do you think of the Indian question?” “I think all good Injuns like good brokers die young.” “Do you believe in the final salvation of all men?” “I do—let me pick the men!” The dinner hour now arrived, and we adjourned to a special
Landon, Melville D. (Melville De Lancey), 1839-1910 [1872], Saratoga in 1901: fun, love, society & satire. Illustrated with 200 photo-etchings by Arthur Lumley. (Sheldon & Company, New York) [word count] [eaf628T]. |