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Jones, J. B. (John Beauchamp), 1810-1866 [1855], The Winkles, or, The merry monomaniacs. (D. Appleton and Company, New York) [word count] [eaf459T].
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p459-018 CHAPTER I. SHADOWS OF COMING EVENTS.

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Babbleton was an ancient village near the city of Philadelphia.
It had a wharf where the steamboats landed, and a
depot where the locomotives whistled. Hence, although the
principal mansions were situated on commodious lots, and in
many instances separated from each other by broad yards and
close fences, it is not to be inferred there was ever a monotonous
deficiency of noise and excitement in the place. It had
its proud and its miserable, its vanities and its humiliations,
its bank and its bakers, its millionaires and its milliners; and
was not unfrequently the scene of some of those entertaining
comedies of life, which have been considered in all enlightened
countries worthy of preservation in veracious and impartial
history. Such a record we have attempted to produce; and
although the direct manner of narration adopted may offend
the taste of the fastidious critic, yet the less acutely discerning
reader may possibly deem himself compensated for the
labor of perusal, by the reliable assurance of the anthenticity
of the story, and the interest attending the occurrences flitting
before his mental vision.

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At a convenient distance from the trafficking centre of the
town, was an old, square, two-story brick dwelling, embowered
with overhanging trees. In the rear and on the south were
a few acres belonging to the premises, which had been originally
planned for a magnificent lawn, but were subsequently, for certain
reasons, devoted to more useful purposes. The grounds,
at the most distant extremity from the house, were bounded by
a sparkling brook, whose source was in a range of hills
a few miles distant. This stream had always been, and is yet,
as every one knows, famous for its abundance of small trout.

It was in the glimmer of twilight, and the lamp suspended
in the hall of the old mansion had been lit by Biddy, the
widow Winkle's housemaid. The rays illuminated the ancient
wainscoting, where some forgotten son of genius had once
exercised his powers of creation in the production of a number
of animated pictures, which the commendable taste of the
Winkles had preserved from the modern invasion of paste and
gaudy paper. On one side might be seen a party of the early
settlers falling into an ambush of the savages; a sketch of one
of Cromwell's battles with the royalists; and then the execution
of the conscientious Episcopalian, the unfortunate Charles.
On the opposite side were landscapes—chasing and angling;
and over them, with their frames reaching to the ceiling, were
half a score of portraits of the Winkle family.

A monastic silence reigned in the hall. A king Charles
spaniel lay upon the floor, with his head between his feet, as if
patiently awaiting the arrival of his master. The crickets came
out, but did not sing. A mouse ran noiselessly under the green
settee without attracting the notice of Dew, whose eyes only
wandered from the broad, bright rods on the stairway to the
huge lock of the front door, without observing that the arms
of the red warriors were in motion; that Cromwell's unhelmeted
brow was assuming a darker frown; that the lips of the royal
victim on the scaffold were moving in prayer; that the panting
buck was actually shaking his antlers in defiance, and that
the floundering trout on the greensward really seemed to be
opening and closing his gills—which might have been easily
perceived by any gazer sufficiently imaginative.

But although the illuminated hall was so still and silent,
one apartment, among the many the old mansion contained,
exhibited no deficiency of animation or mirthfulness. This
was the sitting-room of the family. It had large bookcases

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well stored with volumes, in three of its corners, and in the
fourth, in the good old style, was a fireplace filled with fresh
boughs from the umbrageous trees in the yard.

Mrs. Winkle, a portly widow of some five and fifty years,
sat in her great high-backed chair beside a dark mahogany
centre-table. On the opposite side was seated one of the
tolerated gossips of the town, a retired milliner, a pale, small
woman, something beyond thirty years of age, with thin lips
and a Roman nose, but with an humble expression of eye, and
a soft insinuating voice—particularly when in the presence of
any of her old patrons. Mrs. Winkle had in former years
contributed liberally to the worldly acquisitions of Miss Gusset;
and the latter, for certain reasons, which will appear, was
not in readiness to repay the obligations she owed with the
ingratitude so generally returned for benefits conferred.

“Sit still, Gusset,” said Mrs. Winkle, smiling, and clipping
off the curl of the wick of the spermaceti candle.

“Thank you, Mrs. Winkle,” said Gusset, recomposing herself
on the chair, from which she had been about to rise. “It
will afford me pleasure to stay, if my company is agreeable,
until they come. It is quite time they were here,”—she continued,
drawing forth a huge gold watch, pending from which
were several seals, and a most ponderous pencil case,—“a
whole quarter past the usual time, I declare! I hope no
serious accident has happened. If so, I know they'll regret
not coming in the early boat; and I'm sure I haven't the least
conception why they staid for the late one, unless they didn't
wish to be seen in my company. But they needn't have
alarmed themselves—I had a book — ”

“Bravo, Gusset! I thought something had occurred to
wound your sensitive little heart. You have hardly spoken
ten words during the last hour, and I doubt whether you have
been listening to my diverting histories of the parvenue aristocrats
of Babbleton. You have not laughed as usual. Pooh,
Gusset! You know there is nothing in this world I hate so
much as a grave displeased visage. Reiax your blond features
and tell me the whole story.”

“It's a very short one, Mrs. Winkle, and I don't think it
will give you pleasure to hear it. I never like to allude to
any thing unpleasant before you; you who were born with a
smile, as the Honorable Mr. Winkle used to say, and will die
with one on your lips — ”

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“I hope so, Gusset,” said Mrs. Winkle, still smiling, although
tearlets sparkled in the corners of her eyes. “It is better to
laugh than to cry; and I believe it is quite as acceptable to
our Maker. I will really strive to be cheerful to the last.
They say I have been as mirthful since the loss of our fortune
as before. I'm glad of it. Ha! ha! ha! The idea of laughing
on one's death-bed! Well! Suppose one is at peace with
Heaven, and has no burden on the conscience? A smiling
corpse! Really I think it would be better thus to strengthen
the hopes of the beholders of such spectacles, than to child
them with horror. Give me wax candles and beautiful bouquets.
But go on, Gusset—tell me what happened in the city
to-day.”

“We had a most delightful time going down. The day
was beautiful and the company pleasant. Lucy was as gay as
an oriole—”

“My daughter, you know, is what is termed a `chip of the
old block.' ”

“La, Mrs. Winkle, you are not old! You could pass for
thirty. And Mr. Winkle — ”

“Call my son Walter, or you will certainly make me feel
old. A boy recently out of college called Mr.!”

“Walter was charming — ”

“Who was he charming?”

“Miss Virginia Oakland, as sure as my name is Griselda
Gusset!”

“Nonsense—mere child's play! Go on.”

“Mr. Ralph Roland is thirty-five, I'm sure—so he's no
child. Well, he played against Walter, and Walter won.”

“Pooh! Some people think Roland is playing for Lucy.
If I thought so, I'd soon put a stop to the game!”

“Why, after Mr. Plastic, and the emperor—I mean your
brother-in-law, Mr. Napoleon Winkle—he is thought to be the
richest man in the country.”

“No matter, Lucy's heart is above all price. Never marry
for money, Gusset.”

“Not I! My income, from what I have been able to lay
up with your aid, and the patronage of others, is enough to
keep me comfortable, and independent, too! When we got to
the city, Mr. Roland walked with us until we met your sister-in-law—
the princess, I call her—Miss Wilsome Winkle—and
you know she's sixty.”

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“No such thing, Gusset—no such thing.”

“La! didn't I hear you say so yourself the other day,
when the emperor—I mean Mr. Napoleon Winkle—her
brother, said it would be impolite to marry before his sister,
who was two years older than himself?”

“I said she would be sixty in six weeks, and it has been
only three since then,” replied the widow, laughing very heartily.
“And you met Miss Wilsome while Roland was with
you? I wonder she spoke at all.”

“If you could have heard her speak! You know what a
raven-like voice she has—but I'm sure she can't help it—and
with that, such as it was, she said, taking Lucy by the arm,
`Come away, child, from that horrible brute!' And she actually
forced Lucy to go with her!”

“Ha! ha! ha! Just like Wilsome. You imitate her perfectly.
What did Roland say?”

“Not a word. But he ran into the middle of the street
and jumped into an omnibus.”

“Where was Walter?”

“With Virginia, behind, laughing himself half to death.”

“Every body knows Wilsome's strange ways. No one
cares what she says or does.”

“Nor herself either. I'm sure Mr. Ralph Roland is perfectly
gentlemanly in his manners, a handsome man, and as
rich as—”

“Riches are nothing in Wilsome's estimation.”

“Excuse me, Mrs. Winkle, if I venture to think differently.
I am convinced that if I had been rich, she wouldn't have
wished to shake me off as she did!”

“Why, Gusset, have you not just been saying that Roland
was rich, and that she almost thrust him into the middle of
the street?”

“It's a mystery. I can't unravel it.”

“I can. He grievously offended her once. How do you
suppose, now, he incurred her displeasure? You could never
guess. Accompanying some ladies away from her mansion
one night, it being late, for they had been playing whist, he
chanced to tread upon her white tom-cat's tail. The animal
scratched his ankle, and not knowing exactly what it was, for
the lady had screamed and overturned the wax candles (she
will not have gas), he kicked violently, and killed poor Tom.
She has never forgiven him, for she has not yet been able to

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obtain another cat of the same color and disposition. Roland
has had some twenty white kittens under the tuition of his
housekeeper, and does not despair of achieving a reconciliation.
But how did Wilsome look? how was she dressed?”

“I cannot help it, Mrs. Winkle, but really it is painful
to look at her. You know I am a simple and an humble woman,
grateful for all the favors you and your family have bestowed
on me, and ever conscious of my low origin and
inferiority. Of course I could never be so vile as to say an
ill-natured or malicious thing against any one who assisted me
in the time of my need; or against any of their friends or
connections. Yet when such as you, who know my inoffensive
disposition, ask my candid opinion on any subject, I feel bound
to give it. Then, as to Miss Wilsome's form, it is a very
good one. Her shape is, indeed, elegant, and sets off a dress
to perfection. And her feet and hands are very fine. But
she walks more and more on her heels as she grows older, and
it can be perceived that her knuckles become more bony.
Her face—bless us!—why it is plastered over with paint;
and yet such crow's feet and wrinkles are seen below her eyes—
her enormous eyes—down her cheeks and along her neck,
that every one who beholds her is shocked, absolutely stunned.
We feel, alas! that art cannot conceal the frightful inroads
of age; and it is a very melancholy thought, Mrs. Winkle,
for we are all growing older every day.”

“But just now, Gusset, you were complimenting me—”

“Oh, you don't show age, because you are always merry.
I wish I could grow fat, too!”

“You must be merry, first. Yet my sister Wilsome is
often very merry.”

“I fear it is only on the surface, madam; a mere imitation
of the young miss, and it is horrible to witness it. But
forgive me, I would not give offence for the world. And I
declare when one sees Miss Wilsome's form without looking
at her face, she might pass for a reigning belle; for she is always
arrayed in the most beautiful and costly apparel. It is
fashionable too. Indeed she generally has an extra flounce
or so, and I am sure I do not blame her for turning her eyes
away when the young gentlemen in the street are attracted by
her gay exterior, and have an idle curiosity to survey her features.
Several such impertinents followed us many squares;
sometimes coming up even with her, and finding her face

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always averted when their eyes were turned towards it, there
was nothing left for them but to fall back again, and admire
her magnificent form. She did right no doubt to mock them
thus. I do not blame her for not gratifying their idle curiosity.”

“I am afraid, Gusset, you were just then a little incensed.
What motive can any woman have for displaying a fine form
and rich attire, and at the same time concealing from the admirers
that may be attracted the face of the proprietor? Unless
she be known, how can she reap any of the credit? Then
why go to the expense, and take the pains?”

“The pains! True, Mrs. Winkle, for I heard her declare
she was in an agony. She said her corns were throbbing at
every step. I declare, as you say, I cannot see the motive.
But motive or no motive, I have known other ladies to do the
same thing. And you know, as soon as Miss Wilsome gets
within your door, she will, as usual, call for her easy slippers.
Still, you must not suppose she was harsh to me. Oh no!
The moment after we entered her fine mansion, and the door
closed behind us, she turned round and almost smothered me
with caresses. To think she should shake both my hands for
five minutes, as if we had just met, when we had been walking
together more than a mile! Oh! and she had every thing
nice—cakes and wine. She is no prohibitory disciple; but it
isn't wine that gives her such a color. `Come, Gusset, I am
really rejoiced to see you,' croaked she, `take it, dear'—as the
silver salver paused before me—`be at home in my house, be
happy,' and so on.”

“Gusset, that was Christian treatment.”

“No doubt. Just as many Christians act. Sisters at the
communion table—haughty despisers in the street. How I
long to be rich and in high station, just to give an example to
the world—”

“To the world, Gusset? But tell me how Wilsome incurred
your displeasure.”

“Forgive me, Mrs. Winkle; I meant Babbleton, and not
the whole world. Miss Wilsome was very kind, very, indeed—
too kind! Never had I such sumptuous entertainment
before—never before so splendid a dinner—all ordered I believe
from a restaurant's, and costing at least five dollars.
And when the time came to depart, Miss Wilsome, for the
first time, let me know she intended to return with Lucy, and

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that they would wait for the late boat. But she would put
me to no inconvenience on her account. Oh no! she would
not detain me—she was sorry to be separated—but she would
soon have the pleasure of my company again, at Babbleton.”

“Ha! ha! ha! And so she will, Gusset.”

“And when I was endeavoring to get in a word to the
effect that I was quite at leisure, and altogether disposed to
pass the remainder of the day in the city, she was as deaf as
a post, and rattled away with—`My dear Gusset, I hope your
interests may not suffer in consequence of the time we have
detained you here. But I am so fond of your company, and
it has been so long since we met, that I could not bear to part
with you. You shall not lose by it, Gusset. I hope your
apprentices will not do any mischief in your absence—and
that no customers may be lost on my account. Now do not,
dear, good Gusset, be offended at me for having kept you from
your business so long—and when you get home, Gusset dear,
let sister Winkle know that I have Walter and Lucy in charge,
and that I will be with her to-night, and shall have a rubber
at whist.' That's the way she ran on! Just as if she didn't
know I had long since closed my shop! and before I could
reply to her she pushed me out of the room with an attempt
to kiss my cheek!”

“Ha! ha! ha!”

“You may laugh, for it was fancied. And here is a print
of her rouge on my ribbon, and you can see the wrinkles in it,
as plainly as you can see the dirt on the frog-catcher's face!”

“Who is the frog-catcher?”

“Why the march-boy, as they call him, who lives in the
ditches on Mr. Napoleon Winkle's estate. He hunts terrapins,
mushrooms, and such things for the emperor and Sergeant
Blore. Have you never seen Bill Dizzle?”

“Oh, yes, and I pity him.”

“He's the happiest person I know. There they are!”
cried Gusset, rising, as Dew was heard to bark furiously in
the hall.

“Sit still, Gusset,” said Mrs. Winkle, “Biddy will open
the door.”

A few moments after, Biddy entered softly.

“Who is it?” asked her mistress.

“Dill Bizzle, ma'm.”

“Dill Bizzle?”

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“She means Bill Dizzle,” said Gusset. “You know Biddy
always blunders in her speech. But I felt sure it was Miss
Wilsome and Lucy.”

“Biddy, tell him to come in,” said Mrs. Winkle.

“Yes, ma'm,” replied Biddy, withdrawing into the hall,
where the boy was in waiting. Immediately after the maid
uttered a loud cry, and ran into the room screaming frightfully.
Having flung the door wide open, Bill Dizzle appeared
in view. He wore an old cap, its original color obliterated,
and the material of which it had been constructed, unknown.
His carroty hair hung in long locks down his neck, behind
and over his ears. His thin face, as usual, was bespeckled
with the mud of the marshes. His forehead was low, his
eyes small, gray and twinkling; his nose short and broad; his
mouth wide, and his lips sufficiently parted to exhibit a most
formidable array of teeth. He wore a yellow homespun sack,
girdled round with a black leather belt. His pantaloons and
boots were, of course, of the color of the last ditch he had
plunged into.

“What have you there?” demanded Mrs. Winkle, smiling
encouragingly, and gazing at a rod in the boy's hand, upon
which was strung a row of what might have been taken for
the hind quarters of squirrels, nicely prepared for the kitchen.
“Are they a present from my brother, or Sergeant Blore?”

The boy replied by an affirmative nod, and a smile.

“Are they squirrels?”

The boy shook his head, but continued to smile.

“Oh, la!” cried Biddy, finding the power of utterance
again, which had been suspended, “Missus! don't you see what
they be? Look at the little hands! La's a' mercy on us!”

“Little hands! What do you mean, Biddy?”

“Yes, hands! Look at 'em. Baby's poor, dear little
hands! He's been murdering little babies not bigger nor
rats. See the precious little things' limbs and hands!”

“She's a fool!” said Bill Dizzle, without ceasing to smile,
and holding up the rod horizontally before him. “They are
sweeterer and tenderer nor chickens, and the emperor and the
sergeant are now eating the other half.”

“The arms and heads of the babies!” cried Biddy.

“No, I had two rodsful o' green frogs—.”

“Frogs? so they are!” said Mrs. Winkle, approaching
the boy. “Take them into the kitchen, Biddy.”

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“Not for the wide world, man!” cried Biddy. “I
couldn't do it, if it was to save me.”

“Nor would I eat them,” said Mrs. Winkle, turning to
Gusset. “But they must be politely accepted. Here, Dizzle,”
she continued, “is something for your trouble. Be kind
enough to leave them with the cook.”

Bill nodded and started away, but paused suddenly, and
turning round, said abruptly, “And I come to let you know
the boat that's got on board your darter and the emperor's
sister, shied on to a bar, and 'll have to stay till the next tide,
which is jest beginning now. They'll soon be here. I was
putting out my trot line and saw the ladies.”

“That is the cause of the delay, Gusset,” said Mrs.
Winkle. “But I hear the steamer's bell at the landing.
They will be here in a few minutes.” And soon after Dew
was barking joyously.

CHAPTER II. THE GAME BEGUN. THE CAT OUT OF THE BAG.

The arrival of Miss Wilsome and Lucy produced a general
commotion throughout the establishment. They were accompanied
by Mr. Jonathan Dowly, an old bachelor, who had
been one among the numerous competitors for the hand of
Miss Edith Blount, some thirty-five years before the date of
the events recorded in this history. Submitting in silence to
the victory of his rival (the late Mr. Winkle), he had abandoned
the city, and lived ever afterwards in seclusion and
solitude near the village of Babbleton, contenting himself
with dreamy visions of his first and only love. He was never
known to smile except when in the company of Mrs. Winkle,
or some member of the family. Lucy was a perfect duplicate,
in mercantile parlance, of what her mother had been
when young; and Mr. Dowly, happening to be returning from
the city on the same boat, and seeing the aunt and niece unaccompanied
by a protector, had ventured timidly to make a
tender of his services, which had a ready acceptance on the
part of Lucy.

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“Stop, Gusset—don't go yet, that's a good creature,” said
Miss Wilsome, forcing the retired milliner back into her chair.
“I made some shameful blunders to-day. Lucy has been
telling me. You must forgive it; I had forgotten that you
were no longer in business. It would have been so pleasant
to have had you at dinner with us—for we had no company—
and your conversation on the wearisome boat would have been
a great relief. I hope you are quite comfortable, now.”

“I thank you, Miss Wilsome, and your munificent family,
for the little independence I enjoy. My wants are few, and
expenses light. I ought to be satisfied with the moderate
means I possess. I am an humble body, and must never forget
what I once was. I am not worthy of having any apologies
bestowed on me—but since you have so condescended, I
am thankful.”

“Good Gusset—that's a kind creature! Now stay to tea,
and afterwards we'll have whist. I'm so glad you have no
girls to watch over at home. Sister, invite Gusset to stay
to tea.”

“Certainly, she will oblige us,” responded Mrs. Winkle,
who had been insisting upon Mr. Dowly's remaining likewise.
“But Wilsome, what have you done with Walter, and Virginia
Oakland, and Mr. Roland?”

“Oh, I made Walter stay to take care of my house. The
burglars are breaking in somewhere every night. The maids
get too ungovernable if left to themselves—”

“I hope you don't suppose Walter can keep them in order?”

“He can tell me if they misbehave.”

“He can if he will.”

“Will! my will governs in my house. But the principal
reason why I left him in charge of my establishment, is that
I want him to keep my coach in motion every day until the
horses are thoroughly tamed. My housemaid, my coachman,
and my horses are all spoilt by indulgence in idle habits. Do
you know I have not rode in my own coach for a month?
The last time I was out, I thought the horses were going to
mount up in the air, like the mythological teams we read of
at school. They pranced and reared so outrageously, that
I had to call a policeman. My man Snapper could not
control them. Walter seemed delighted with the proposition;
and the Oakland rosebud is to stay several days in the city

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with her aunt. I don't know what became of the beast Roland
after I sent him to Coventry. Of course, Gusset has
told you how that was.”

“I hope, Wilsome, Walter will be wise enough to take
care of himself,” remarked Mrs. Winkle, gravely.

“I gave him particular instructions, and of course he will
regulate his habits accordingly. Has your old beau consented
to stay to tea? But no matter; he never could play. Yet,
he is as silent as a sarcophagus. He didn't speak a dozen
words on the boat—but just laughed with his eyes at Lucy.
There was, however, a very gentlemanly somebody smitten
with us. I have seen him at Madame R.'s, but don't know
him. He shifted his position continually, but never got a
front view of me. I wonder why the men are never contented
with the aspect presented them! But here's the tea.
Lucy must wait on her ancient beau. I have not heard his
voice to-night.”

And Lucy did so very assiduously. She spread the snowy
napkin on Mr. Dowly's lap, and held the sugar-dish for him,
while he helped himself in silence. Mr. Dowly was past sixty
and quite gray. His form was tall, slight, and quite erect for
one of his age. His face was very pale, and the texture of
the skin almost as delicate as a lady's. His eyes were large,
very dark and expressive, but beneath them were huge,
wrinkled cavities. His mouth generally protruded into a wobegone,
melancholy expression. But his nose was large and
finely shaped, redeeming many of the traces of time and sorrow
on his manly countenance. His dress was remarkable: he
wore sometimes a blue coat, made thirty years before, and
sometimes a brown one, fabricated fifteen years after the blue
one, and both seemed to be as bright and free from the evidences
of dilapidation as when they issued from the hands of
the tailor. His hat, too, although shining in aspect, belonged
to a former generation; and, in accordance with the good old
fashion, his neckerchief was of a snowy whiteness. Poor old
Mr. Dowly had deeply loved Miss Blount, and never sought
the smiles of any other. He had been rejected for Mr.
Winkle; but it produced no other sensation in his breast than
that of melancholy regret. He had never ceased to gaze with
pleasure on Mrs. Winkle, and, as we have said, never smiled
except when in the presence of some member of her family.
In his dreams he was always young again, and Miss Blouns

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unmarried. By day he lived in the past; scenes and sentiments
of former years filled his reveries. He had always
been in the habit of occasionally visiting the family, but was
ever a silent guest, unless compelled to respond to the friendly
words addressed him. He had not been a more frequent
visitor in the days of Mrs. Winkle's widowhood than during
the lifetime of her husband. It was too late in life to renew
his addresses, and he preferred his accustomed contemplations
of the past to any of the realities of life which might now be
presented to him. He lived on a small farm, a short distance
from town, employing a careful Welsh housekeeper and an
industrious gardener, her son. His circumstances had been
good; but no one now knew any thing of his fortune. Most
people believed him to be poor, simply because they never
knew him to incur any expense that might be avoided. Whatever
investments he had were in the city, and of course they
were past finding out, since he never spoke of his affairs to his
neighbors.

Lucy being called away by her aunt, who was arranging
the preliminaries for the rubber at whist, Mrs. Winkle occupied
the seat vacated by her daughter, and seemed inclined to
engage her old beau in a conversation. The old gentleman's
large dark eyes were immediately illuminated.

“Here, we sit together again, Mr. Dowly, just as we did
thirty years ago. It seems to me very wonderful that at the
completion of three decades, after the many storms of the
world, and all the vicissitudes of life, you and I, and a few
others should be left together upon the shore of time, while so
many we knew, younger than ourselves, and apparently with
stronger constitutions, have vanished from the scene for
ever.”

Mr. Dowly made no reply, but assented by the liquid eloquence
of his eyes, and a shrug of his shoulders.

“I strive to be cheerful, Mr. Dowly,” resumed the widow,
“and find it more pleasant to laugh than to repine. I see in
my daughter a counterpart of myself, when at her age —”

“She's beautiful—lovely—good,” said Mr. Dowly.

“Ha! ha! ha! Precisely what you said of me, some thirty
years ago! And believe me it is as gratifying to hear it now,
as it was then. You never reproached me for the preference
I gave Mr. Winkle.”

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[figure description] Page 014.[end figure description]

“He was a preferable man. Different from the rest of his
family. He was my friend, and I his.”

“And I should be sorry to think you have been unhappy.
I wonder you did not marry.”

“No; I have been very happy. I live in the past. My
thoughts by day—my dreams by night; and so it shall be to
the end. I am glad I never married. I never will marry.
But you will let me be your friend. That is all I ask.”

“Most certainly.”

“And Lucy; she may want a friend.”

“How? Oh; you mean my lamented husband died a
bankrupt. But have we not friends? There's sister Wilsome
and my brother-in-law—both unmarried like yourself, and the
last worth a million, and as generous as the prince he supposes
himself to be, in his fits of strange hallucination.”

“I hope they may be always mindful of their duty. I
have no relations. This property, I believe, is all your husband
left.”

“All. Ha! ha! ha! Small as it seems, the few acres
attached are made to yield me a large revenue, I assure you,
by the industry of good old Dibble and his son David, the
gardeners.”

“You are fortunate in the Dibbles. But is not the place
encumbered by a mortgage?”

“I believe so; but my brother Napoleon attends to the
interest. I really don't know who holds the mortgage.”

“I do; but no matter. Only this—if you should ever
have a serious necessity for the use of funds, which your family
may be slow in offering, don't forget John Dowly. Nobody
knows any thing in relation to that old man's pecuniary means,
and no one has any right to know—but you. Don't forget
him.”

“Forget you! How can that be possible? For the last
twenty years not a week has gone by, that some little present
has not come to our house to remind us of the existence and
uniform kindness of good John Dowly. The only difficulty
is, how to repay with gratitude the munificence of our generous
friend.”

“Forget that! forget that! I am benefited more than
any body else; only do not forbid me—do not reject them,
and I shall continue to be happy. Good night! good night!
My horse and carriage are at the inn. The moon shines

-- 015 --

[figure description] Page 015.[end figure description]

brightly, just as it did when I was young. I am merry.
Good night.” And the old man departed, his large brilliant
eyes glistening the more from the slight humidity that pervaded
them.

“How shall we contrive it?” asked Wilsome, seated in a
rocking chair near the table, and addressing Lucy in relation
to the proposed game.

“Let me see,” responded Lucy, archly. “Ma, you know,
has an aversion to the grave silence imposed on the players.
You have often said she was too merry for whist. Gusset
plays very well; but should there not be a man among us?”

“There should be. I forgot that when I made Walter
stay in town. But who would have supposed there was not a
single man to be had in all Babbleton?”

“There are an abundance of single men here,” said Mrs.
Winkle, smiling.

“Deuce take the bachelors! I mean a single gentleman,
married or unmarried, for one's partner at whist. I can't
play with a lady partner. Why, Lucy, have you no beaux?
Don't blush so, child! Really, you begin to look like a woman.
Behold her, sister; she is taller than you, and yours was a
good height. See her broad shoulders, her almost Juno neck,
her full rounded bust, her ivory forehead, her cloud of dark
chestnut hair, her beautifully flushing cheeks, the white and
red contending for the mastery! I never noticed her before.
She is a lovely creature!”

“Aunt Wilsome!” responded Lucy, laughing heartily.
“What should I do if I were to hear some gentleman utter
such a speech?”

“Do? Why, if he were one approved by your family—
which, never forget, is a good one—you might recline your
head on his shoulder, and surrender your heart. But never
be precipitate; ten years hence will be time enough. You
see I am in no hurry. Still, I think you are old enough, and
handsome enough to have beaux. At least some visitor
capable of playing whist as my partner. Is there no such
one?”

“There is a gentleman living in the white cottage opposite,
who sometimes visits Walter, and who remarked last
evening that the game was a sensible one.”

“He's a sensible man. Who is he, Gusset?”

“A mysterious person. He has been here only a few

-- 016 --

[figure description] Page 016.[end figure description]

months; no one yet visits him but Mr. Walter, and he goes
nowhere, except occasionally, to return Walter's visits. But
he is handsome, and only about twenty-five. He is tall, pale,
and sometimes very sad.”

“What is he doing here? Has he no profession, no
business?”

“It seems not. He has taken the cottage, and brought
some furniture and a great many books from New York.”

“Does he live alone?”

“He has an old housekeeper, he brought with him—and
she is English, for she says ouse instead of house, and hair
instead of air.”

“How does he dress? What sort of feet and hands?”

“His clothes are very genteel—but not foppish. His feet
and hands are small and handsome, the latter very white”

“So! He is either a gentleman, or a black-leg, or forger,
or fugitive, or something of the sort. What do you think,
Lucy?”

“I know him to be a gentleman, aunt—and an educated
gentleman, who has been accustomed to the best society. He
has read every great author, and is very agreeable in conversation.
He is a musician too, and sings delightfully.”

“Oh, I see you like him. I don't think he can be one of
the opera troupe. What's his name?”

“Lowe—Edmund Lowe,” said Gusset. “But surely he
won't play cards with us—”

“Why?” demanded Miss Wilsome, abruptly.

“Because, one Sunday, when the rector's wife was taken
suddenly ill, and her husband was sent for, Mr. Lowe, stranger
as he was, stepped forward and offered to read the service.
Surely he won't play cards!”

“That don't follow. But did he read?”

“He did indeed,” said Mrs. Winkle, “and I never heard
the prayers better read in my life.”

“That will do. Send for Mr. Lowe to be my partner.”

Lucy whispered to Biddy, the message she wished to be
delivered. A few minutes after, Mr. Lowe was ushered in,
and introduced with due formality to the old maid, whose
partner he became without the slightest hesitation.

“I'm afraid you will repent of your complaisance,” said
Lucy to Mr. Lowe, who sat at her elbow while her aunt
shuffled the cards. “My aunt plays very patiently—”

-- 017 --

[figure description] Page 017.[end figure description]

“Of course I do,” said Miss Wilsome; “the game loses
its interest when neglected.”

“I am very fond of the game, and have been called a good
player,” replied, Mr. Lowe.

“I'm glad to hear you say so,” said Miss Wilsome,
secretly planning to employ as much of his time as possible
during her stay at Babbleton.

“My aunt sometimes indulges in long sittings,” pursued
Lucy, with an arch glance at the composed features of the
gentleman.

“I frequently retire at three in the morning, and rise at
eleven,” was the imperturbable reply.

“You are the very partner I want!” cried Miss
Wilsome.

“Fortunate sister,” said Mrs. Winkle, laughing; “but
you must have pity on Lucy. If she remains awake too long
after the usual hour of going to rest, she will have shocking
eyes the next day.”

“There is too much brilliant fire sparkling in them now,”
said Miss Wilsome, “to be dimmed so easily.”

“I declare, Mr. Lowe,” said Lucy, “my aunt has done
nothing but compliment me ever since this game was
proposed.”

“Pay attention to your cards, Lucy, and assort them before
you begin. It is Mr. Lowe's lead,” said Miss Wilsome.

“How could she do otherwise?” was Mr. Lowe's calm
response, whilst leading a trump.

“That's the knave, I believe,” said Miss Wilsome, staring
at the card. Her vision was impaired by age, but it was observed
that she never used her glasses when unmarried
gentlemen played with her. “Sir, you do me honor,” she
continued, with her lips contracted into a simper.

“But it's my trick!” said Gusset, triumphantly, playing
the ace.

Before the first game was ended, a tremendous explosion
was heard in the distance, and was followed quickly by a succession
of startling reports.

“Bless my life! What's that?” cried Miss Wilsome,
springing up from her chair, and running to a window. “See
that flash! Just listen!” she continued.

“It is a salute,” said Mr. Lowe, joining Miss Wilsome.
“I did not know there was a ship of war in the river.”

-- 018 --

[figure description] Page 018.[end figure description]

“Nor I either,” said Mrs. Winkle, smiling. “Indeed I
know there is no such ship in this vicinity.”

“Is there a fort in the neighborhood?” asked Mr. Lowe.

“No!” responded Miss Wilsome, angrily, and returning
to the table. “Take up your cards. It is only my crazy
brother. He should be confined in a madhouse when those
fits are on him.”

“Your brother?” asked Mr. Lowe.

“Yes, sir. Is it possible he has been quiet since you have
been residing here, so that you have not heard all about him?
Yes, it is my brother Napoleon Winkle. He is a monomaniac
on the subject of Bonaparte's campaigns—in other
matters he is rational enough.”

“He is an amiable, generous, noble-minded man,” said
Gusset, with emphasis, though timidly.

“Why, Gusset, what do you know about him?” asked
Miss Wilsome, fixing her large searching eyes upon the retired
milliner, and then, seeing Mr. Lowe evinced some interest
in the subject, she continued: “My brother, although
really eighteen months younger than myself, and still a
bachelor, is proprietor of one of the largest estates in the
county, which was mostly inherited from our father, who divided
his fortune equally between his three children. Napoleon,
preferring land to money, holds the old homestead
plantation, which he has most singularly divided and subdivided
into tracts after the plan of the map of Europe. Every
state of Europe, whether empire, kingdom, principality or
duchy, may be found on his farm. Of course he resides in
France. He reads nothing that does not glorify his great
model; and so fascinated has he become with the bloody
career of that detestable butcher, that he sometimes fancies
that the spirit of the conquering demon has been transmitted
to him, and animates his corpulent body! He has been told
that he resembles Bonaparte—and he really does look like the
prints of him—and of course that fact exercises a powerful influence
over his imagination. He has likewise picked up
somewhere an old sergeant—one legged, one armed, and one
eyed—who served under the Emperor, believes he was a God,
and that his soul has taken up its abode in the breast of my
poor brother. They have a perfect identity of ideas and
feelings; and so they have erected little forts in the countries
they fancy they have subjugated, and ever and anon they

-- 019 --

[figure description] Page 019.[end figure description]

celebrate the anniversary of some one of their victories. That is
the solution of this startling rumpus to-night. I dare say my
sister Winkle there, who is turning over the leaves of Alison's
history, will soon be able to tell us what battle occurred on
this day of the month. The magistrates of the county ought
to put a stop to such a ridiculous nuisance, for the whole
country is often startled and shocked at an unexpected
moment by such Quixotic operations.”

“All the justices in the state would not venture to attack
the good man,” said Gusset.

“Gusset, you are the only one I ever saw who was willing
to defend my brother—and truly he does not need any one to
defend him. No doubt if the officers were to approach his
premises for the avowed purpose of suppressing his amusements,
he would conceive them to be invaders from some
hostile country, and would send bombs and grape-shot in their
midst. He has eight or ten old cannons, large and small, and
a mortar or two. In one of his engagements he had a horse
killed under him—”

“You mean an imaginary horse, Miss Winkle?” remarked
Mr. Lowe.

“No indeed! He was fighting over the battle of Lodi—
forgetting, I believe, that the first Napoleon was then on foot—
when one of the old pieces, which Sergeant Blore was firing
with a slow match—himself out of danger—burst into a
thousand pieces. The horse was torn to atoms, while the
rider remained unhurt. Then the sergeant embraced his
master, and called him the `Little Corporal!”'

“Never have I heard of the actual existence of so singular
a character,” said Mr. Lowe. “It reminds me of Sterne's
fictitious Uncle Toby and Corporal Trim.”

“Yes. And often have I told my brother that he was a
plagiarist; but he assured me upon his honor that he had
never read a word of Sterne, and it cannot be denied that he
is a man of strict veracity and honor. But he banished me
from his territories for even suggesting such a thing. He
called me a meddling Madame de Stael, and told me, most
imperiously, to go and perform my true mission as a woman,
letting politics alone!”

“Ha! ha! Just like Napoleon the first,” said Mrs. Winkle.
“But here it is! It is the anniversary of the battle of

-- 020 --

[figure description] Page 020.[end figure description]

Marengo, and it appears the victory over the Austrians was
not complete until after nightfall. Poor uncle Toby!”

“I do not think, Ma,” said Lucy, “that uncle Winkle
copies Sterne's hero. He does not fight with jack-boots, and
there is no widow in the case.”

“No, truly,” said Gusset. “And I've often heard Mr.
Winkle say no widow could ever carry his heart.”

“And you remember the saying?” interrogated Miss Wilsome,
darting a glance at the milliner. “My brother, I
suppose, has no notion of marrying at all, at least not immediately.”

“No, aunt,” said Lucy. “He has often said he would
wait until after the celebration of your nuptials.”

“And, my pretty niece, that may occur sooner than you
suppose. But if it should not, pray don't let it be a restraint
upon you.”

“Oh, mercy, aunt!”

“Then don't meddle with sharp instruments. What
amuses my partner? He is almost convulsed. Pay attention,
sir! Gusset would not have won that `trick,' as she calls it,
but for your inattention. Being third in play, you should
have secured it.”

“But I have the honors, and we win the game. I was
thinking of an incident I witnessed during the battle of Buena
Vista, which our resumption of the game brought to mind.”

“Were you in that battle?” asked Lucy.

“Oh yes. Merely as a spectator. I have been a wanderer—
a—”

“The incident—the incident,” said Miss Wilsome, dealing
the cards.

“The mounted regiment from Kentucky, as you must be
aware—” began Mr. Lowe.

“No, I did not read a word of the war, because I was
opposed to it.”

“The Kentuckians were ordered to maintain a certain
position. After every charge they returned to the ground
specified. That their horses might continue in wind, the
riders, after every attack, dismounted, and choosing partners,
sat down and played cards on the ground. And I noticed
that whenever the order came for them to mount and charge
the hostile lancers, each one put down his cards, the trumps
carefully concealed at the bottom. And when they returned

-- 021 --

[figure description] Page 021.[end figure description]

if the amusement had not been forestalled by the loss of a
partner—and I believe one in every five of the regiment fell—
the game was resumed with a nonchalance equal to our own
after the cannonading we heard just now.”

“Well, Biddy? well? What do you want?” asked Mrs.
Winkle, seeing her maid open the door leading into the hall,
and standing in a hesitating attitude.

“It's Dill Bizzle, mam.”

“Bill Dizzle, she means,” said Lucy, smiling at the habitual
blunder of Biddy.

“What does he bring, now? Mushrooms or terrapins?”

“It's in a bag, mam—and he sis it's for Miss Milsop.”

Wilsome—you stupid dunce!” cried Miss Winkle, her
temples as red as her cheeks. “Remember that, Biddy. It
is the second time you have made that blunder. Let it be
the last.”

“Ye—s mam.”

“I don't like to be called mam, either. But what has the
boy brought me? Tell him to come here with it. With
your permission, Mr. Lowe.” Mr. Lowe bowed his assent.

Dizzle was ushered in with a bag on his arm. In vain it
was conjectured what its contents might be. Lucy retired to
the furthest corner of the room, and her mother did not approach
nearer to the messenger or his mysterious burden.

“What in the world is it?” demanded Miss Wilsome, in a
loud voice.

“I'll show him,” said Dizzle, with his invariable smile,
striving for some length of time ineffectually to dislodge the
object from the sack.

“Mercy on us! It moves! Is it alive?” cried Lucy.

“In course he's alive,” said Dizzle, violently jerking up
the closed end of the sack, and forcibly extricating the
animal.

It was a beautiful white cat. And it stood quite motionless
in their midst, and during the breathless silence that
ensued, gazed round in utter bewilderment at the strange
faces. It then uttered a piteous cry, and walked slowly towards
Miss Wilsome, who sprang upon it with spasmodic
delight and hugged it in her arms.

“It's my poor Tom, or his ghost!” cried she.

“He's one of the family, and jest as good as the old Tom,”
said Dizzle.

-- 022 --

[figure description] Page 022.[end figure description]

“Poor puss!” continued Miss Wilsome, delighted to see
the pet appreciating her caresses, “where in the world did
it come from? Excuse me, Mr. Lowe, but I had a cat I
loved so much—he died—or was cruelly murdered by a dog
named Roland—and this is a perfect picture of him. Who
sent it to me, Dizzle? Here's a dollar for you.”

“He told me, before I told you, you must tell me—”

“I must tell you?”

“If it was going to make you mad.”

“Mad? Why no! If—if—if it is only another—like the
one I had,” continued Miss Wilsome, gazing affectionately at
the humming and purring creature—“I mean if it should be
another—”

“Don't you see it's another?” responded Dizzle. “Jest
as much like your old Tom as two peas—not a black hair on
him—and not a bit wicious!”

“I mean, Dizzle, if it has the same name—and the same
disposition—and—”

“His name's Tom, and in course— Mr. Roland said
you'd as soon have a nanny goat about your house as a biddy
cat. He's a innocent fellow, too, I know.”

“You think he never murdered a mouse?” asked Mr.
Lowe, which was succeeded by half suppressed explosions of
laughter from Lucy and her mother.

“Dizzle!” continued Miss Wilsome, “if Mr. Roland sent
me this pet, tell him he has made amends for his unlucky act—
and that I forgive him. Go now, Dizzle. Mr. Lowe,
please excuse me for desiring to postpone the game until tomorrow.
You can have no conception of the deep interest I
take in the poor dumb domestic animals which are generally
so cruelly treated. I am aware of the censure I incur; but
I defy the scandal of idle tongues. Good-by, Gusset. But
whatever affords us any degree of happiness, however insignificant
the object which produces it may appear, should not be
despised.”

Mr. Lowe assented readily to the proposition, remarking
that one of his aunts had been so fond of a poodle as to
carry it always in her carriage, and she made it a rule to kiss
the dear little creature every night before retiring to rest. He
then took his leave; and Miss Wilsome, giving full vent
to her long pent up affection, almost distracted poor Tom with
her infinite fund of endearments.

-- 023 --

p459-040 CHAPTER III. ON A LARK—WALTER—THE STUDENT—THE POET.

[figure description] Page 023.[end figure description]

Left sole master of his aunt's establishment in the city, young
Winkle resolved, as most young gentlemen of his age and disposition
would have done, to make the most of his opportunity,
and reap the greatest possible amount of enjoyment from the
means and time placed at his disposal. Therefore, no sooner
had his aunt and sister departed for the boat, than he tossed
the book he had been reading—“The Mirror of Moral Propriety,”
written for the edification of credulous dupes—to the
farthest extremity of the parlor, and leaning back, rang the
bell very violently.

“Tell Snapper to have the carriage at the door as soon as
possible,” was the young man's order to the housemaid, who
gazed with eager curiosity.

“Iss, sir.”

“And when you have done that, Rose, come back to me.
I shall want you.”

“Iss, sir,” responded the maid, springing away to do the
young man's bidding.

Then Walter promenaded the magnificent saloon, with a
proud step and a sounding heel. His hands were thrust into
his pockets behind, and his eyes, disregarding the statuary
and fine paintings surrounding him, were fixed upon the
ceiling.

“If I could only meet with one of the fellows, now!” said
he, “what a time we would have! If I thought my aunt
would stay away several days—but she never knows herself—
I could write to Princeton, or to New York, and get one or
two—”

“Iss, sir,” said Rose, standing before him at one of his
turns, and dropping a slight courtesy.

“Oh, you told him, did you?”

“Iss, sir.”

“All right, Rose. Rose, I suppose my aunt told you all
that I was left master of the house?”

“Iss sir.”

-- 024 --

[figure description] Page 024.[end figure description]

“And of course every one will do whatever I desire?”

“Oh iss, sir.”

“Then tell the cook I may have company to a late supper;
and if I do, I shall want at least five hundred oysters roasted
in the shell. Is there any champagne in the cellar?”

“Iss, sir.”

“See that the cobwebs are brushed off some half-a-dozen
of the bottles.”

“Iss, sir.”

“I suppose my aunt don't smoke cigars?”

“Iss—Oh la, no, sir.”

“Then I'll buy some. She gave me her purse. Let the
bill for the oysters—and a brace of woodcock—be presented
in the morning—”

“It can't be done, for it's onreasonable!” said the great
fat colored cook, who had been listening in the hall, and now
came boldly forward, as matters pertaining to her jurisdiction
were discussed.

“Why, Griddle? Pray, why is it unreasonable?”

“Why? Why who ever heard of oysters at this season?”

“True—I didn't think of that.”

“There's none but milky ones—and the cholera's bad
enough without helping it any.”

“True, Griddle. You are a philosopher. But what is
there nice for me to invite a friend to, if I should meet with
one?”

“Plenty. I can get woodcock, and if you can afford it—
for Miss Wilsome wouldn't—I can get fresh salmon—”

“That's it. Get a dollar or so's worth. I hear the bell—
see who it is, Rose. [Exit Rose.] Now, my good Griddle,
I may rely on you?”

“That you may! Say nothing more about it. It does
my heart good to see young people enjoy demselves in reason,
if they behave demselves. And I saw old Snapper's eyes
blinking, and his teeth grinning, as he went to the stable. It
does our old hearts good to get a sight of the young gentry
once in a while.”

“Iss—it's the coach, sir.”

“Is it down fore and aft? Stop, I can see through the
blinds. Yes, all's right.”

“Snapper'll do right!” said Griddle. “He'll have every

-- 025 --

[figure description] Page 025.[end figure description]

thing open and displayed in grand style. And he's got on his
new coat with the silver buttons.”

“Iss, and his new hat, with the broad silver lace band.”

“I can't tell when I'll be back,” said the young gentleman,
pulling on his kid gloves. “But have the supper and the
champagne ready when they are called for.”

He then strode through the hall, and descended the flight
of marble steps in front with the elasticity of buoyant youth
enfranchised from every species of restraint, and exulting in
the possession, as he supposed, of the means of commanding
the most perfect happiness. No individual in the street of
decent exterior escaped his eyes as he mounted into the luxuriantly
cushioned carriage; and he was quite sure that no eye
could withhold its admiring glance from his handsome person
and brilliant equipage. Nevertheless Walter Winkle was not
excessively vain, and he was noe engaged in his first fit of extravagant
folly, an indulgence mainly attributable to the reaction
which sometimes follows a long imposed restraint, or is
one of the incidents of healthful youth, and accompanying the
exuberance of spirits so often inseparable from it.

Snapper had now an opportunity of taking off the wiry
edge of his high-mettled and almost ungovernable horses. His
whip sounded startlingly over their astonished ears. Their
nostrils were turned out, their eyes emitted luminous rays,
and their bits were covered with foam, before the expiration
of the first hour of their exercises. Walter, alone in the carriage,
reclining on the rear seat, had already traversed most of
the fashionable thoroughfares, and had doubtless been stared
at by thousands of dark flashing eyes, for the gay season at
the watering-places had not yet commenced.

“Snapper!” cried Walter, as they were returning slowly
through Chestnut street, and when opposite the custom house—
“follow that man with the straw hat—the one with a blue
coat and metal buttons. I think he's a friend of mine. Deuce
take the omnibuses and drays—”

“The drays are loaded with kags of silver and gold,” replied
Snapper.

“And Uncle Sam's specie seems to be the only money in
the country that passes too slowly. Can't you get round it
some how? I'm afraid we'll lose the blue coat and brass buttons.
I wish some of the Washington officials were here!”

Snapper succeeded in extricating the horses from the

-- 026 --

[figure description] Page 026.[end figure description]

throng, by dint of hard whipping, a commanding voice, and
his silver lace and buttons, just in time to come up with the
pedestrian when opposite the door of the American hotel.

“George Parke! Huzza!” cried Walter. “How are
you, old fellow,” he continued, leaping down and seizing the
hand of his friend, who was really younger than himself, although
“old fellow” was repeatedly uttered by them both.

“Whose carriage is that, Winkle?” asked Parke.

Mine—mine for a day or two, at the very least. But
where are you going?”

“To the American, here. You know what that means.
Out of money. Uncle Johnny at Princeton, you know, thinks
differently. Have you seen any of the boys? Our class is
off for the vacation. I don't go South this summer; but have
written home for money. I have only a shilling left for cigars,
and don't know how I am to get to the opera to-night, unless
the landlord will lend me some cash. I'm glad the college is
in good credit here.”

“Say no more!” cried Walter. “Let me fling your carpet-bag
in. Now jump up yourself. You shall be my guest.
Aunty's away, and I am master of her establishment. Jupiter,
Mars and Saturn! But I am glad I met you! What would
I have done there alone, or with only a pack of grinning servants
laughing at me, a noisy parrot, and a mischievous monkey?
We'll enjoy ourselves, Parke, and you shall be at no
expense. Drive home, Snapper! Parke, old fellow, there is
a beautiful girl in the city—”

“A thousand, you mean.”

“No, I don't. But there is one, above all others, the
queen of beauty—the, the Oakland.”

“Is she here?”

“At her uncle's—Dr. Nitre's. I brought her down today.
After rubbing up a little we'll go there and have her to
ride with us.”

“Won't her aunt Nitre go along?”

“I hope not. But if she does, you know Virginia's my
prize. That rich snob, Ralph Roland, is still following her—
but she says he's not the thing. And I flatter myself—”

“But Winkle, you must let me have a fair start with
you.”

“Parke! It may be well for us to understand each other,
and then there can be no mistake. Virginia and I are—”

-- 027 --

[figure description] Page 027.[end figure description]

“What?”

“Engaged! Now you have it. We expect to wait a year
or so—but the thing is understood between ourselves. That's
all. Don't whisper it in your dreams. Now, you may flirt
with her as much as you please, and I can rely upon your
honor.”

“Oh, yes—I understand. The old trick.”

“I assure you I am serious, George, though I cannot for
the life of me look grave. If it were not so, what objection
think you could I have to your falling in love with her, and
she with you? None, whatever, believe me. But you forget
Julia Nitre! If the old lady should take it into her head to
be one of the party, I don't suppose her daughter is to be left
at home.”

“I've heard some accounts of Miss Julia; and if she be
half as handsome as they report her, you may enjoy your real
or pretended affianced to your heart's content. Is this your
aunt's establishment? It is stately enough.”

They descended in front of Miss Wilsome Winkle's mansion,
and without delay mounted to the third story. The
apartments had been hastily prepared for the accommodation
of Walter, but nevertheless, there were many evidences remaining
of the idiosyncrasy of the proprietor. Broken furniture,
fractured china, and old slippers; the accumulation of
some thirty years, were packed away under the beds and in
the corners. Even dingy doll babies, probably arrived at the
mature age of threescore and ten—for they had amused the
little Wilsome some sixty years before—were visible in the
closets. And on the mantel-piece, preserved in a glass case,
was an antique silver pin-cushion, filled with pins blackened
by the damps of departed generations, and duly labelled as
the one used by Miss Winkle's mother, or grandmother, it is
not recollected which, on her wedding-day. In another case,
were the high-heeled wedding shoes. In short, Miss Wilsome
was one of those remarkable characters who literally preserve
every thing, and in emergencies can find nothing, because of the
superabundance and confusion of their acquisitions. And
although she was quite as parsimonious and economical as
might be consistent with the habits of life, yet she never knew
the exact state of her finances. Having originally one hundred
thousand dollars, in money, the entire sum was invested
in such securities as the cashier of the bank where the deposit

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had been made, advised; and she never inquired further in
relation to the safety of the investment, or in regard to the
fluctuations of the stocks. The investment had been made
when the stocks were fifty per cent. below par; and they had
subsequently declined most alarmingly, without causing her a
painful thought. But they were now fully at par; that is,
worth double the sum she had paid—and yet she did not seem
to be aware of the gain. The dividends were passed to her
credit in the bank, and she drew upon them without numbering
her checks, or keeping any account of the balance subject
to her order. She relied upon the annual publication of
balances which the law required the banks to make, to ascertain
in an indisputably authentic form, the exact statement of
the amount of funds subject to her demand at stated periods.
Such was her peculiar financial system; and the most acute
banker would have failed in any attempt to convince her that
her income might be materially increased by the adoption of
any other.

“See here, Winkle!” said Parke, “are we not in the
wrong chamber? This looks like a nursery, or a museum.”

“It looks like aunt Wilsome's mind precisely—but I will
see if any other room on this floor is in a better condition.
No!” he continued, endeavoring to open other doors. “All
locked. Just like her. She won't trust us in any other
chamber than the one allotted to us. Some of them they say
have not been entered for years by any one but herself. She
creeps about alone with a candle in her hand at all hours of
the night. So say the servants, who have watched her. But
if you are ready, let us be off.”

“How does that look?” demanded Parke, adjusting his
cravat before a large old ebony-framed glass.

“Quite right. Come.”

“How much money have you, Winkle? You know I told
you I had none.”

“Let me see what's in the purse my aunt threw me. First—
a penny.”

“By Jove, a penny! Where are the opera tickets and the
cigars to come from?”

“Stop! Here's a quarter—and a number of three cent
pieces. Ha! next come the quarter eagles—one, two, three,
four, five, six! That's all.”

“That will do.”

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“Jupiter! What's this in the other end? A check—a
check for one hundred dollars!”

“Good!”

“It is good. Payable to bearer. Drawn a week ago—
look at the date. She's forgotten all about it?”

“Will you draw the money?”

“If we need it. But come. We must give the girls an
airing. There's old Snapper gazing up for us, and the horses
are snorting impatiently.”

The young bloods descended to the street, and were soon
sitting in the coach in the attitude of unfeigned satisfaction.

A few minutes afterwards the young gentlemen were entering
Mrs. Nitre's parlor. They found themselves rather abruptly
in the presence of the young ladies, and were joined a
moment after by Mrs. Nitre and the merry-faced doctor.

“We came to propose—” said Walter, stammering and
hesitating, after the ceremony of introducing his friend, and
laboring under some degree of embarrassment, notwithstanding
his predetermined impudence, or boldness; and as all eyes
were now turned upon him, and a silence prevailed, he found
it impossible to proceed.

“The deuce you do!” at length exclaimed the doctor,
rising comically. “If that be the case, Mrs. Nitre, should
not you and I withdraw?”

“Don't attempt to be witty, doctor,” replied his wife; “no
one is amused at you; all can see that you merely affect to
be serious.”

“We came to propose,” continued Walter, blushing in
unison with the girls, “to the ladies—” and again he
paused.

“Of course, to the ladies,” said the doctor, “who else
could it be to?”

“To Mrs. Nitre, and—” pursued Walter, forgetting his
previous resolution of omitting her name, but aware there
would not be room for five in the carriage.

“Oho!” cried the doctor, “then it must be a proposal of
some other nature.”

“If such a thing were possible, the doctor would not object
to see me proposed for and taken away,” said Mrs. Nitre,
who was one of the few dames who habitually depreciate their
husbands in the presence of their guests, without being aware

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that husband and wife are a unit, and that they must necessarily
degrade themselves by such practices.

“I mean that we came to propose a drive in my aunt's carriage,
which is waiting at the door,” said Walter, now quite
recovered.

“And to slight me—deliberately to cut me,” said the doctor,
apparently not heeding Mrs. N.'s allusion. “But my own
carriage will be at the door in a few minutes. I have to call
at the Girard to see some friends—the Gaffs of New York—
and Mrs. Nitre has agreed to accompany me.”

“I believe I won't go,” said Mrs. Nitre. “The Gaffs are not
intimate acquaintances of mine. They made a fortune selling
drugs by the dose, soda-water by the glass, tooth-brushes, cologne,
etc.”

This speech was made to young Parke, whose family was
known to be of the aristocratic order.

“Then I need not delay. I will excuse you on the plea of
company,” said Dr. Nitre, rather gravely; “but I hope, my
dear, that I may invite them to tea to-morrow, and that you
will call on them this evening.” And he departed without
further delay.

“No doubt the vacation is a carnival,” said Miss Oakland,
who had engaged in a free conversation with young Parke, and
was exerting her powers of fascination, for she was piqued at
Walter for having, it might be unconsciously, surrendered a
beautiful rose to Julia.

“It is indeed. And we endeavor to seize the opportunity
to reap its enjoyments. Fortune has favored me to-day. I
came alone to the city, and in a melancholy humor, for I was
out of money, as well as out of spirits, and almost out at the
elbows, to await a letter from home, when Winkle espied me.
What a change! I am now the happiest of men!”

“Men!” cried Mrs. Nitre, placing her hand on the youth's
arm, “you must first get into the senior class, my dear boy.”

“But the sun is sinking,” said Walter, “and the carriage
waits.”

“There is room for only four in the carriage,” said Julia,
looking out of the window.

“That's awkward,” said Mrs. Nitre. “I cannot trust the
girls alone with such madcaps. Remain to tea, and send home
the carriage.”

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“Will you let them go with us to the opera, if we do?”
asked Walter.

“Not to-night.”

“Why not, mamma?” asked Julia.

“I don't go to such places often. Our rector does not approve
of it. But it is probable the Gaffs may be there, and
then my husband might be suspected of uttering or conniving
at a falsehood.” Mrs. Nitre, although she habitually strove
to mortify the doctor when in his presence, was remarkably kind
to him behind his back.

“Then you will stay?” asked Julia.

“I sup—” began Walter.

“You recollect our positive engagement?” said George,
quickly.

“Hem—yes! I came near forgetting it. I'm very sorry;
but we cannot break the engagement,” replied Walter, wondering
what sort of a story George would invent.

“So you are engaged for other company, Mr. Parke?”
asked Virginia.

“Yes,” said George, without hesitation. “Several fellows
from Princeton are to meet us there. But if we can find them
before the doors open, perhaps we might persuade them to
come here.”

“Do so,” said Mrs. Nitre. “The girls will expect you.”

The young gentlemen departed, promising if possible to return
in the evening.

“What fellows from Princeton did you mean, George?”
asked Walter, as the carriage proceeded slowly towards the
theatre, the horses being now quite jaded, and altogether tame
enough.

“Ourselves, of course. I thought we were to have a lark
to-night.”

“Good! And I was not well pleased with Virginia's conduct.
She had nothing to say to me.”

“Oh, you had no rose for her.”

“Julia snatched it. Ha! ha! That was the reason.
Here we are. Drive home, Snapper, and you need not return
for us. Tell cook to have a glorious supper in readiness—
and take a bottle or so into the kitchen for yourselves.”

The young gentlemen soon grew weary of the opera. There
was not a fashionable audience present; and although they
might be able to translate Italian, they could not interpret it

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as it was uttered in song on the stage, and hence they did not
find themselves so pleasantly entertained as they had anticipated.
At the end of the first act they abandoned the place.

“Back to Nitre's?” asked George.

“No,” said Walter; “we're on a lark.”

“Where shall we go?”

“Let me think.”

“To Abraham Laban's! What say you?”

“The Jew pawnbroker's?”

“Yes.”

“Why? I have plenty of money.”

“Why? For the fun of the thing. Great Nose knows
me.”

“No doubt of it.”

“And perhaps he'll permit us to have a glance at his customers.
He's fond of fun himself when he don't lose by it.
And he's rich, too. They say he is owner of fine houses—has
ships at the wharf—gold in the mines—manufactures false
dice—contracts with the government—sues the insurance companies—
is a politician—distils brandy from rye, and lends
money under three balls. At certain hours he may be found
at his different places of business, and I have reason to know
this is his night for the three balls. Let us see how much we
can raise on my watch.”

“No. Let me try my diamond pin. I can redeem it tomorrow.
The less he advances, the less will be the cost of the
fun.”

“Agreed. But let us appear to be in a d—l of a fix—
most distressingly in need of money. That will sharpen his
cupidity, as my books say, and cause the interest to be less,
as the advance will certainly be small. What is the pin
worth?”

“It cost my father, I have heard my mother say, just fifty
dollars.”

“We'll see what he says of it. After business, if he drives
a good bargain, he may be pleasant. Come on—it is near at
hand, in the next back street.”

“You know the way?”

“Yes. He once sold a flute of mine among his forfeited
collaterals, and a friend bought it at a less sum than Great
Nose had advanced me. But he has recovered the loss since.”

They had now arrived at the place of entrance under the

-- 033 --

[figure description] Page 033.[end figure description]

balls glittering in the moonlight. Young Parke knew the signal
and soon obtained admittance.

“Ah! Is it you? I'm glad to see you, Mr. Parke, and
your friend. Come back into my private office,” said Abraham,
who was an American Israelite, leading the young gentlemen
into a small, well lighted apartment, which he usually
occupied himself, and whence he disputed with his customers
through a square opening communicating with a stall in the
front room.

“Any customers in front?” asked Parke, after introducing
Winkle as his friend, without naming him.

“Not now. There may be, soon. Many of the fashionables
are making arrangements to spend a few weeks at the
watering-places. I have had two curious applicants to-night
whom you should have seen or heard. It would have been a
lesson for you.”

“Tell us about them, Abraham.”

“Perhaps I will, after business. What have you brought
me this time? Not the old flute, I hope. That was a smart
trick. I won't advance so much next time. I was too liberal.
What do you want now?”

“Nothing myself. I'm rich since I made that fortune out
of you. My friend here wants your assistance.”

“I hope I shall have the pleasure of serving him. I will
advance him any amount on his simple bond.”

“That is liberal,” said George; “you never made me any
such generous offer.”

“Your parents live too far away. Besides, I did not know
you had any rich bachelor uncles and maiden aunts.”

“Do you suppose I have any?” asked Walter.

“Ha, ha, ha! You know me—every body knows the Jew,
Abraham Laban; and why should not Abraham know every
body? Tell me that, Mr. Walter Winkle.”

“I see no reason why he should not. You certainly know
me. Well, I am in great distress for a little ready cash; and I
fear to forfeit the good opinion of my rich relatives by applying
to them just at this particular time. Besides, my necessity
is most urgent, and will not admit of delay. It is to compound
a little scandalous affair on my hands, which would ruin
me if made known.”

“Aha! Pretty scrapes you pretty young gentlemen run
your necks into. But you must pay for them.”

-- 034 --

[figure description] Page 034.[end figure description]

“I am willing to pay. I have this diamond pin, worth,
you know, two hundred dollars—”

“Two hundred cents!” said the Jew. “That would be
nearer the mark.”

“Oh, I want only fifty dollars—”

“Fifty dollars! Why Mr. Parke, some one worse than
any Jew has been skinning your friend, if he paid any such
price as he says this thing is worth.”

“What do you say it is worth?” demanded Walter.

“Pooh! some twenty dollars, I suppose, if some dandy
had his heart fixed on it. Fifteen is as much as I can
venture.”

“Two hundred down to fifteen!” said Walter. “What
a fall! Well, my countryman, have your own way. Launch
forth the monish!”

“Here! But, young man, I have my doubts about the
truth of your tale. I am too much accustomed to the
symptoms and aspects of real distress to be easily deceived.
Yet I confess I do not understand your motive.”

“Is it necessary you should?” asked Walter.

“No—not in matters of business; but merely for my own
satisfaction. Every one knows my motive.”

“Yes. The balls declare it.”

“And somehow I find out the secrets of my customers, if
they don't choose to reveal them themselves. I should not
be surprised if you came here purely for amusement. Confess—
and you shall be entertained.”

“Here's your money. My pin! But to convince you of
my candor now, see this check. Cash it for me on your own
terms.”

“Good. Here are ten eagles, that I borrowed from the
banker this morning—or rather received them at the solicitation
of one of the officers, the stockholders being willing
to share the gains above the usual interest.”

“Now tell us about the customers.”

“Listen, and remember. The first was a clergyman. A
Christian seeking aid from a Jew!”

“But not a Dives, petitioning father Abraham,” said
Walter.

“No. And yet he has had his good things in this
world. He came enveloped in a cloak—warm as the weather
is—which I soon caused him to throw aside. I do not like

-- 035 --

[figure description] Page 035.[end figure description]

disguises—from myself. He confessed all. He has enjoyed
the reputation of being the possessor of wealth in Louisiana,—
has preached in the fine churches—and finally captivated
the heart of a young widow of two months' standing—”

“Two months' standing?”

“The grass has not yet grown over the grave of her deceased
husband. She, too, is regarded as a fortune. Well,
the lover desired a sum to keep up appearances ten months
more, until the expiration of the decent term of mourning.
He offered me fifty per cent—”

“And you agreed to it, of course,” said Parke.

“I did no such thing!”

“And after hearing his distressful tale?” asked Walter.

“You shall know all, and then decide. No offer he could
make would avail, and so I dismissed him. The next visitor
was a beautiful young lady, in deep mourning—”

“In mourning!” cried both the young gentlemen.

“In deep mourning—for she was the widow—”

“The widow!”

“Yes, the widow; and she was very properly in mourning.
But the veil was lifted for me. She confessed what I already
knew very well, that her late husband died insolvent. And
then she spoke of the great fortune of her wooer—the clergyman—
and said if she could only borrow from me the means
of meeting the demands of creditors until the celebration of
her nuptials, she would then be enabled to pay me munificently.”

“Is this romance or reality?” asked Walter, gravely.

“It is truth. I know the widow could not be deprived of
her dower. Her husband possessed much real estate, although
he died insolvent. I told her she would have sufficient
fortune for a comfortable support, and advised her not to seek
to avoid an exposure of her husband's affairs. I then told
her all I knew of her lover, the nature of his application to me,
and of his design upon her supposed large fortune.”

“What did she say to that?” asked Parke.

“Not what you would suppose. Her heart had not been
engaged in the matter at all. As a clear-headed, cool, calculating
woman of the world, she merely laughed at his impudence
and hypocrisy; lamented her own want of discernment;
and then calmly renounced him for ever. No doubt
she will ensnare a rich beau before the end of the year, and

-- 036 --

[figure description] Page 036.[end figure description]

then she will remember the Jew. Be silent! I hear the
tinkle of another visitor.”

This visitor, when admitted by the girl who answered the
bell, did not proceed at once to the stall of communication;
but strode backwards and forwards under the small lamp that
dimly illuminated the dreary room. And as he promenaded
words were uttered in his soliloquy, not comprehended by
the Jew.

“He's talking Latin!” said Walter, in a low tone.

“Greek too!” responded Parke.

“Greek and Latin! Who can it be? Let's have a peep
at him.”

They beheld a thin man of medium height, with a black
frock coat buttoned up to the chin. His face was very pale,
and classically handsome. His forehead, especially, was a
noble one, fair, round, and expansive. His age might be five
and thirty. At length he approached the pawnbroker's cell.

“I want money,” said he. “My name is Pollen. Perhaps
you have heard it.”

“Yes, I have heard it—and so has every body, I
suppose.”

“Is it good?”

“Good? Yes, a very good one, as a poet. And it will
be famous; for the British reviewers say you are a man of
genius.”

“If it be good, then, how much is it good for?”

“How much money? That's a different matter. I deal
in dollars and cents, and tangible valuables. The commodities
of fame and genius, and all such fanciful things, may be
esteemed by those who traffic in such articles, but I am not
one of them. I want that which I can see, feel, taste, barter,
exchange, for my money.”

“Would you not like to have your name mentioned in the
biography of a man of genius, as a generous benefactor?”

“No! What good would it do me when dead?”

“If you did not survive to enjoy it, would it not be a
credit to your despised tribe?”

“No. Rather a curse. Men of genius, lacking common
sense, improvident and poor, would be always wearying them
with their importunities, as you are now wearying me.”

“Have you no feeling for men of genius in distress? I
am in distress; and you say I have genius.”

-- 037 --

[figure description] Page 037.[end figure description]

“I attend to my business. This is my place of business.
I pursue my business to amass riches. You come to me and
speak of genius, of feeling, and such nonsense. If I can
make money by dealing with you, well; if not, leave me.”

“Enough. You can, perhaps, make money by the operation.
Here is a short poem—one of my best. I have been
paid fifty dollars for one not better nor longer. Take it, and
give me forty dollars.”

“No.”

“Thirty.”

“No.”

“Twenty.”

“No.”

“Ten.”

“No.”

“One dollar!”

“Let me see it.”

“Here it is.”

“Read it, young gentleman,” whispered the Jew, placing
the sheet in Parke's hand, “and let me have your opinion.
If it is good, I know an editor who will buy it.”

“I sell my name with it,” said the poet—“for I must eat—
and that you know is not unknown.”

“Good!” cried George.

“Glorious!” cried Walter.

“Who says so? You have company, then? Bribe them
to be silent, or this interview may be bruited over the world.
But they are critics. I shall raise the price, Shylock.
Beware! Five dollars is the very least I will take for my
poem.”

“If the publishers have paid as high as fifty dollars, why
did you not apply to them?”

“I did. I came from one of them directly to you.
Happy thought!”

“Was it approved?”

“Yes. But unfortunately I was something in arrears for
former advances, and desired to obtain the cash for this poem.
But they wanted it in fulfilment of an engagement. I
promised others, but insisted on having the price of the
present production, to answer my immediate necessities.
They would not believe me, which is a provocative of delinquency.
But I will fulfil all my engagements. Do you buy

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[figure description] Page 038.[end figure description]

it, and I will dedicate it to you for a certain consideration,
received in advance—”

“Aha! Now you are the man of business. See now, if I
was not right awhile ago.”

“Very right. What shall the dedication be worth? I
must know beforehand. A friend once dedicated to a rich
man, and did not receive, in return, so much as an acknowledgment
of the compliment. Business men must be dealt with
in a business like manner. Men of great hearts in a noble
manner. Asses in an asinine manner.”

“How will you classify me?”

“As you may deserve.”

“I will give you five dollars for the poem.”

“Good! I shall eat again, and then sleep.”

“The dedication?”

“D— the dedication. Your name shall not be associated
with mine.”

“Not on the same bond, truly. But mine would bring the
most money.”

“The most filth—dust, dust, dust—what is money, but so
much of the dross of the earth, whilst my coinage is indestructible!”

“I will not give you five dollars for the poem.”

“Then pass it back.”

“I'll give you ten!” cried Walter.

“Are you there, young Truepenny? Come forth. You
shall have it, and share a jovial bottle with me besides. Come
forth.”

The young gentlemen joined him immediately, notwithstanding
the attempts of the Jew to the contrary, and the
three sallied forth together. The name of the poet, Harold
Pollen, was familiar to the young men, and that of Winkle
was not unknown to the poet, for he had once been an invited
guest at Miss Wilsome's mansion, and had played whist with
her. A few moments sufficed for introduction, and then it
was agreed they should immediately proceed together to the
“Winkle Mansion,” as it was called.

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When the young gentlemen entered the “Winkle Mansion,”
they found a sumptuous repast awaiting them; and as the
poet had fasted long, and intimated that he was annoyed by
an intolerable thirst, not many words were spoken until several
courses had vanished, and after the decapitation of the second
bottle.

“Winkle,” at length said the poet, “you know of course
who it is you are entertaining in this princely manner.”

“Certainly—the author of `The Treasure,' `The Steed
of the Clouds,” and `The Rook,'—a poet, who—”

“A vagabond!”

“A genius!” said Parke.

“A vagabond,” repeated Pollen.

“You seem to be minus the usual quantum of linen about
the neck,” said Walter, scrutinizing his guest. “Why is
your coat buttoned up to your chin in such suffocatingly hot
weather?”

“Because I have neither vest nor shirt under it.”

“Is it possible?” cried the young men together, really
shocked at such an announcement.

“I could give you further demonstration by unbuttoning
my coat. I suppose you have some linen in the house, and
will clothe the poet whom you have so sumptuously feasted.”

Walter immediately conducted his guest to the chamber
above, where he was speedily arrayed in a snowy nether garment,
and accommodated with a seasonable vest.

“I did not say I was a vagabond,” continued Pollen, on
resuming his seat at the round table in the dining-room,
“because of the deficiency in my wardrobe, and for the pitiful
purpose of obtaining the loan of a shirt; but because I
write tales and verses, and am poor—because I forfeited an
estate by refusing to flatter a woman I disliked—because I
won't cheat and steal—”

“That's a strange reason,” interrupted Parke.

“It is a strange world. Let me whisper a secret in your

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[figure description] Page 040.[end figure description]

ear—and mind, you are not to betray your author. Will
you both promise, upon your honor, not to betray me?”

“Both. Upon honor.”

“Then listen!” said the poet, in a hoarse whisper, while
his face assumed a paler hue than usual: “All very rich men,
who have made their own fortunes, are rogues and rascals.”

“I have heard that before,” said Walter; “but I cannot
believe it.”

“No doubt some of my friends have whispered it about
the world,” said Pollen. “It is true, though, and you may
believe it. But I have another secret, which I am sure you
have never heard. The vagabond is quite as happy as the
rich man. The proof? I am the vagabond, and the hunchnosed
Jew is the rich man. Well, suppose Abraham sleeps
some eight hours in the twenty-four. His dreams are filled
with conflagrations, bankruptcies, robberies; visions of the
broken-hearted widows and orphans he has despoiled; arrests
for crimes long forgotten by all but himself; prisons and
compulsory restitutions. Then we may estimate some four
hours of the day devoted to fearful anticipations, to threats
of enemies, reproaches of his victims, and dread of detection.
Thus half of his life is miserable.”

“Now, yours?” said Walter.

“My dreams—when sober—are blissful. I am the possessor
of illimitable wealth, without a pang of remorse, for no
one has been victimized in the process of its acquisition.
With boundless generosity, I enjoy the luxury of bestowing
benefits on the deserving and needy. The oppressor scowls,
the usurer gnashes his teeth at me; but the good and the
humble bless my name. What felicity! I mount into an empyreal
atmosphere—become dephlogisticated—”

“And metaphysical,” said Walter. “But we are in this
mundane region now, Pollen, with tangible objects before
us.”

“Very true, and I will descend to them. But you must
admit I have demonstrated that without a dime in my pocket—
I lie, I have an eagle—I may enjoy more hours of happiness
than the rich Abraham.”

“When you are quite sober,” said Parke, sipping his wine,
“and in your dreams.”

“Keep sober!” cried a voice, from the portico in the
yard.

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[figure description] Page 041.[end figure description]

“Who said that?” cried Parke, stepping to the open window
and looking out among the vines, where all was silent
now, and lonely in the moonlight.

“A mere echo,” said the poet, when the young man resumed
his seat.

“It sounded very much like my aunt's voice,” said Walter.
“If she were to come upon us, we should be given into
the custody of the watchman.”

“Trumps! Down with your trumps!” said the voice.

“My aunt! Let us escape!” said Walter, leaping up.

“Sit still. Be calm,” said the poet. “It is not her voice.
I believe in the existence of ghosts.”

“Feathered ones,” said Parke, standing again at the open
window.

“The parrot!” exclaimed Walter, resuming his seat.

“An imitator. He merely echoes the sounds he hears.
Hence the resemblance of your aunt's voice. They call me
an imitator of Coleridge and others, but—”

“No metaphysics,” said Parke.

“The d—l,” exclaimed Pollen, rising abruptly.

“What's the matter, now?” demanded Walter.

“I'm bitten. A mad dog! See—my finger is bleeding.”

“I hear the rattling of a chain under the table,” said
Parke. “I thought I saw something glide in from yonder
door as I returned from the window.”

“Sit still!” said Walter. “Move not a muscle; a mosquito
could not have produced such a wound.”

“Nor a cobra di capello,” said Pollen.

“It is biting my toe!” said Parker, turning pale, and
kicking the assailing object violently with his heel.

They sprang up in great alarm, and discovered, in amazement,
Miss Wilsome's great monkey in the last convulsive
struggles of death. Parke had broken its neck.

“Monkeys and parrots!” said Pollen; “abominations to
man—fit companions for old maids.”

“My aunt will lament over Jocko as she would over a
brother. Mr. Roland accidentally killed her cat, and she has
never forgiven him. How shall I avoid her anger? She'll
disinherit me.”

“Leave it to me,” said Pollen, dragging forth the dead
animal by its chain, which was of silver. “I hope all the servants
are asleep.”

-- 042 --

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“Are you asleep, Biddy?” asked Walter, turning towards
the door leading into the kitchen.

“Iss, sir,” was the prompt response of the watching girl.

“I understand her,” said Walter, seeing the astonishment
of his companions. “She means that we need not fear her.”

“Then lead the way to the roof of the portico,” said the
poet, “and get me a nail and hammer. I will suspend him
from the eaves, and it will be a case of accidental strangulation.”

“Good!” cried Walter; “or, what is infinitely better, a
case of suicide—despair on being abandoned by his beloved
mistress. Excellent!”

“I could tell you some singular freaks of monkeys,” said
Pollen; “but let us first hang up this gentleman.”

The work was soon accomplished, but not without danger
to the young gentlemen, for their vision was becoming confused,
and their steps unsteady under the influence of their
excessive libations.

The three jovial comrades then sallied forth into the street,
their arms interlocked, and humming snatches from the opera
in the moonlight.

“Be cautious, young gentlemen!” said a watchman, meeting
them.

“Why?” asked Pollen.

“Are you a pick-pocket?” asked Parke.

“I shall keep my eye on you,” replied the watchman.

“And if you do,” said Walter, “you will not see straight
again during the remainder of your life, for I believe there is
an obliquity in our course.”

“Yes,” said Parke; “and every five minutes brings us
against a wall, or over the curb.”

“My thoughts are mounting upward,” said Pollen—“earth
vanishes from my vision. I see meteors and coruscations.
They are the flashy novelists and poets forced into being by partial
critics. They fill the atmosphere—they go out like rockets—
but the blue vault above is gemmed by illuminating stars
that will remain for ever. The vagabond Pollen—sneered at
by splay-footed English compilers, frowned upon by Scotch
librarians, slighted by publishers, slandered by his rivals—
will take his place among them, and cast his rays upon the
world!”

“What is that, poetry or prophecy?” asked Parke.

-- 043 --

[figure description] Page 043.[end figure description]

“Irreverent interlocutor! It is true, lamentably, a prophet
is without honor in his own country. I will reap the
honors bestowed in other countries.”

“But will you live to enjoy them?” asked Walter.

“No, I suppose not; therefore I enjoy them now—in
anticipation. Ha! ha! ha! I wonder if Abraham has any
such enjoyment?”

“Halt! Steady!” said Parker, as the three companions
were confronted by several gaudily-dressed persons who ran
against them.

“Who are you?” demanded Pollen.

“Fairies,” said one of them. “We heard you talking of
the sky and the stars.”

“Night hawks, you mean. Avaunt! Off, I say!” continued
Pollen, endeavoring to thrust away the one that clung
to him. “Begone to your dripping caves; we are not the
prey you seek. The shirt I wear is borrowed—”

“But your breath smells of good wine.”

“Do you covet it? Off, I say! My sword! Oh, that I
had one! Boys, she has torn my bosom.”

“What now?” demanded the watchman, appearing before
them. “I said I'd keep an eye on you!”

“You neglect your duty, sir!” said Walter. “While
you are watching us, who are gentlemen and peaceable, you
permit us to be beset by these—”

“What?” demanded one of the strangers.

“Street harpies.”

“That will not do,” was replied.

Pollen turned aside with his companions, leaving the
guardian of the night engaged in amicable converse with the
harpies. The poet had a well-founded dread of the watchman's
rattle, for he had been more than once an involuntary lodger
at the depot of nocturnal offenders.

And Walter and Parke, not relishing the idea of an adventure
with the police, to which they were conscious of being
liable, from the excited condition of their intellects, agreed to
return to the mansion, and finish the night under a friendly
shelter, and where they could not be subjected to any unpleasant
interruptions.

By means of a night-key, which Walter had taken the
precaution to furnish himself with, the door was opened and

-- 044 --

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they entered in triumph. But an unforeseen disappointment
awaited them.

“What does this mean?” exclaimed they upon closing the
door, and finding themselves in impenetrable darkness.

“Biddy! Where are you? Why did you put out the
lights?” cried Walter, groping his way through the hall.
“Softly, gentlemen,” said he; “let us get back into the
dining-room. Hold each other's skirts, and proceed in Indian
file.”

“Out here, too,” said Parker, when they reached the
dining-room. “Who has matches?”

“Not I,” said Walter, “nor do I know where to find
them. Let us go up stairs and rouse Biddy. How dark!”
he continued, as they ascended the stairs, feeling their way.

“Not a star blinks upon us,” said Pollen.

“Nor a meteor's ineffectual fire,” said Parker.

After ascending several flights of stairs, the party paused
and felt for the chamber doors, and not knowing which might
be occupied by the housemaid.

“I doubt if Biddy is here,” said Walter, in a whisper.
“My aunt, I suspect, makes her sleep in the attic.”

“Where poverty-stricken poets repose,” said Pollen.

“But the door opens,” said Walter. “If we find beds
let us lie down till morning lights the orient, and not trouble
the servants.”

“Agreed!” was the response of the others.

In a short time two beds were found; but before our adventures
had begun to undress themselves, their ears were
saluted by frightful cries and screams.

“Who can they be?” said Walter. “Three different
voices, and all females. Biddy!”

“Emily!”

“Clara!”

“Oh, Mary—sister! Thieves! Robbers!”

“Murder!”

Such were the cries proceeding in quick succession from
the beds.

“Hold fast to my coat-tail, George,” whispered Walter,
leading the way out into the passage. “We are in the wrong
mansion! My aunt's night-key fits her neighbor's door! Let
us get out again as quickly as possible, or the whole

-- 045 --

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neighborhood will be alarmed. What a scrape! and the first night,
too!”

“There it is!” said Pollen, trembling violently, upon
hearing a window thrown up, and vociferous cries for the
police. And the next moment several rattles were sprung,
and hoarse voices and the trampling of heavy feet could be
distinguished in the street.

“What's this?” asked Walter, pausing in his retreat, and
finding his hand resting upon a round, smooth surface. “It
is warm! A man's bald head, by Jupiter!”

“Have mercy upon me and my poor daughters,” said the
crouching father of the alarmed family. Walter recognized
the voice of a distinguished professor, the occupant of the
house; and without replying he passed on, followed by his
companions, clinging to each other. They proceeded beyond
the turning which would have conducted them down stairs,
and wandered into the rear building, where they confronted
the old housekeeper in her chemise. She fell speechless and
fainting, and they stumbled over her, falling in a heap beyond.
But there was no time for idle delay. The police had burst
open the front door, and one or two shots from revolvers had
already been fired at random in the darkness.

“Here's a room open!” said Walter, with his hand on the
latch of a door at the extreme end of the long back building.

“In there!” said the poet. “They have a light, and are
pursuing us!” They entered, and found the apartment uncarpeted,
and could distinguish objects in it, for the moon
shone through the window.

“A store room, filled with barrels!” said Walter.

“And here are empty ones on this side,” said Parker.

“Let us hide ourselves in them—quick!” said Pollen.
They did so, and ceased to speak for many minutes, while the
police searched in other places for the burglars.

“We have escaped, I think,” whispered Walter.

“How the deuce are we to get out?” asked Parker.
“Walter, old fellow, you've got me into a d—l of a scrape.”

“It is an adventure. Consider the fun! Won't we laugh!
But my aunt must never hear of it. I can venture to tell
Virginia.”

“Hist! I hear them yet!” said Pollen. “If we are
found the whole world will know it, for the press will speak
with a million tongues.”

-- 046 --

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“If they catch us, Walter,” said Parke, “we must not
let them know who we are. I'll be John Smith, and you
John Jones.”

“But I am known,” said the poet, “and shall be recognized.”

“True,” said Walter. “That is the misery of being
distinguished. We will stand by each other, and share the
same fate. Besides, we can easily escape by explaining
frankly the mistake. Perhaps they will suppress our names.
The adventure itself, however, must be related, and the whole
town be set to guessing. Be quiet. I hear some one coming
this way. Hush! you'll betray us by such sneezing.”

“Curse the flour! I can't help it!” said Pollen, who, with
Parke, kept up an incessant sneezing, the sounds of which
they vainly strove to suppress.

“Listen!” said a voice in the passage. “Here they
are!” The next moment the door was thrown open, and a
flood of light poured in. Three or four policemen entered,
each holding a revolver in the left hand and a mace in the
other. They were followed by the fat professor, holding in his
hands, which trembled very much, a large blunderbuss. The
rear was brought up by several servants armed with pokers
and carving-knives; while at a distance behind, might have
been dimly seen the old housekeeper, brandishing a long-handled
broom.

“I—I don't see them here,” said the professor, after
glancing his eyes fearfully round the room, and breaking the
silence that had ensued after the party had entered. “But
they are somewhere on the premises, and one of them put
his hand on my head.” His head was now covered with a silken
cap.

Pollen sneezed again just as he ceased speaking.

“What was that? Bless my life!” exclaimed the professor,
nimbly springing away from the poet's barrel in the
vicinity of which he chanced to be standing.

“They are in the barrels,” said the leading policeman in
a loud voice, “and if they do not surrender, we'll send a
shower of balls through the staves.”

“We'll surrender, of course,” said Pollen; “we are without
arms.”

“We'll not take your word for that,” said the officer.
“Rise and show yourselves.”

-- 047 --

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All three stood up.

“Mercy on us! Oh Lud!” cried the cook and coachman,
starting back, and rushing away over the prostrate form of
their master, who nevertheless rolled and scrambled out of
the room.

Their affright was natural enough, for our young adventurers
who had entered the barrels in black, now appeared
in white. Even their faces and hands were thickly covered
with flour.

“It was only a mistake,” said Walter. “We came hither
with no evil intent, but merely entered the wrong house by
mistake. We thought we were in the adjoining building, and
were about to retire, as we supposed, to our beds—”

“Here are their hats,” said Mary, the oldest of the professor's
daughters, now venturing to join the policemen.

“That story won't do,” said the policeman, bowing to the
young lady. “Are there any more of you in the other barrels?”
he continued, addressing the supposed robbers.

“No,” said Pollen. “But my friend's story is true, as
you will ascertain.”

“We'll see. No more words. I don't want to hear a
syllable. You are our prisoners. Seize them, men!” They
were seized and conducted out. But as they passed through
the hall, Mary with seeming pity gave them their hats, while
the other sisters standing aloof, gazed at them without symptoms
of alarm.

Unwilling to hear any thing their captives might have to
say in justification of their conduct, although it was easily perceptible
from their manners and speeches that they were not
common burglars, the policemen hurried them away to prison,
and locked them up in a room where there were many offenders
who had been taken that night.

“Angels and ministers of grace defend us!”

was the exclamation of an actor, confined with the rest,
upon seeing our adventurers advance after the heavy door had
been locked upon them.

“We have not committed any crime,” said Parke, glancing
round at the staring company of men and women; some
seated upon benches, and others lying on the straw. “We
were merely on a lark, after enjoying our champagne. We are
gentlemen.”

-- 048 --

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“Not gentlemen ob color!” said a corpulent Negro.

This was followed by a boisterous explosion of laughter at
the expense of the young men, whose whitened exterior alone
was sufficiently provocative.

“I'm on the bench,” said the actor (which was literally
true), “and will hear your cause.”

“Agreed!” cried many of the company, crowding round.
“Let us hear what they have to say for themselves.”

“`Most potent, grave, and reverend signiors,”' said Pollen,
standing forth, and lifting his hand, “I will, with your permission,
relate the manner of our coming hither.”

“No!—Yes!—It is!” cried the actor, rushing forward and
embracing the poet, whom he had recognized, notwithstanding
his mask of flour.

“Mum!” whispered Pollen; “don't betray me to this vile
herd.” The poet had written a play in which the actor had
represented one of the characters.

“Proceed,” said the judge, resuming his seat, amidst
shouts of laughter at his ludicrous appearance, having robbed
the poet of half his flour.

Then Pollen, concealing names and localities, succinctly
narrated the adventures of his companions and himself. At
the conclusion, the company pronounced a unanimous acquittal,
which was ratified by the judge.

“And now, Mr. Glass,” said Pollen, addressing the actor,
“pray tell us what brought you here.”

“Intoxication, and grief, and damning a watchman who
stared at me impertinently. You smile at the word grief, but
I am serious, as these tears—a man's tears—may attest. My
Dilly—I mean my daughter, my only child—was entrapped,
and taken away from me last week. Every body knows how
glorious was her debut, and that she has ever since been
greeted by rapturous applause at every subsequent appearance.
She was rising, I declining. But just when I had reason
to believe her capable of relieving me of a portion of my burden
of toil and care, the tempter came! A rich man—”

“A d—rascal!”

“Most assuredly he was, my friend,” continued the actor.
“He said he wished to rescue her from the dangers of the
profession. By costly presents, and seemingly parental affection—
for he was twice her age—he induced her to desert
the stage, upon which her father had won distinction, and to
promise him to abandon it for ever. Many propositions he

-- 049 --

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made her; but the only one she listened to was that she
should, under an assumed name, take up her residence in
some respectable boarding-house in New York, until her
education was completed. She left me more than a week ago.
A letter in her chamber was filled with pledges of filial affection,
and resolutions to preserve her honor. I find that
my salary has been increased through some mysterious agency;
but my happiness is all gone. I drag heavily through my
part every night, and then seek to drown my woe in deep
libations. I lodge here, where alone I find honest sympathy.”

“It is a rascally world, Mr. Glass—this company excepted,”
said Pollen. “Oh, that I could find a true American!
The plays, the operas, the ballets, are usurped by
foreigners! Foreign literature alone is lauded—the critics
are foreigners, and monarchical and aristocratic modes of
thought, feeling and action, are fermented through every pore
of the Republic. We get our manners from the British, our
costumes from the French, our wines from the Germans, our
voters from Ireland and our religion from Rome! Our librarians
are Scotchmen. They not only exclude my books from
their shelves, but laugh in my face whenever I look over their
catalogues!”

“No doubt my evil tormentor Ralph is of foreign extraction,”
said Glass.

“Ralph? Did you say Ralph?” asked Walter, roused
from an apparent lethargy he had fallen into. Parke was
snoring on a bench.

“Yes—Ralph Roland!”

“I know him. I would advise you to get your daughter
away as soon as possible.”

“I need not be advised! I want only the means of doing
so. Thank heaven, I have cause to be confident of the impregnability
of my daughter's virtue against a million roués
and rakes in arms! That alone sustains me.”

Towards morning all the inmates became silent. Some
of them brooded over their troubles, while others slept. In
the morning, a confidential note written by Walter to Professor
Point, caused a speedy liberation of the three jovial companions.
Pollen then interested himself in the actor's behalf,
and easily succeeded with his honor the mayor, whose sympathy
with the sons of genius or of Momus, was never appealed
to in vain.

-- 050 --

p459-067 CHAPTER V. SECRET PLOTTINGS—THE FROG HUNTER—MUSHROOMS AND PATTY PANS.

[figure description] Page 050.[end figure description]

We have seen that the appearance of Bill Dizzle, the frog
hunter, at Mrs. Winkle's, with the beautiful tom-cat, put an
immediate end to the game of whist. Miss Griselda Gusset
departed immediately after, and was met a few steps from
Mrs. Winkle's door by Ralph Roland, who drew her arm
through his and led her into the obscurity under a large sycamore-tree
that stood on the opposite side of the street.

“Well, Gusset,” said Roland, in a low voice, pausing under
the great tree, “is my peace truly made with the infernal old
maid? Bill Dizzle says so, but he don't know always what
he says.”

“It is, indeed. But why have you taken such pains to
please her? You don't wish to marry her.”

“Marry her! No—but you know Lucy is the most charming
creature in the world, and as the family in Babbleton are
likely to become dependent on the old maid, it will follow that
Miss Wilsome's caprices shall be respected by her niece.”

“But, really, are you in love with Lucy?”

“Desperately!”

“And Virginia?”

“Quite as deeply!”

“You are a Turk! But you can't marry them both.”

“Leave that to me. I believe Virginia Oakdale is in
love with Walter, and Lucy with this mysterious Lowe—a
fellow low enough, I doubt not, polished as he is in manners.
Now, my happiness depends upon the utter frustration of the
hopes and calculations of them all—and you must aid me, as
I am aiding you.”

“What have you done for me?”

“I rode to the Emperor's to-night just after his startling
cannonading. He was in one of his finest humors; and when
he asked if all the good people of Babbleton were not abusing
him, I told him you were delighted with his military celebrations,
and only regretted you were not a man to join him, and

-- 051 --

[figure description] Page 051.[end figure description]

share the pleasure of fighting all of Bonaparte's battles over
again.”

“What did he say to that?”

“Gad, he said you were the only national woman he
knew, and that if he were ten years younger he would marry
you.”

“He did? Did he say that to you?”

“Certainly—and he'll say the same thing the next time
he meets you, if his sister or sister-in-law be not present to
intimidate him. It is singular that one so indomitable and
self-willed in the field, should be so pusillanimous and impressible
in the house, when plied by the women.”

“But what did you say, when he made that remark?”

“Oh, I told him that he was quite young enough; that
no doubt you would accept such an offer, and if you did, he
would possess a meek and sympathizing coadjutor in his
wife.”

“I thank you, Mr. Roland—and I will assist you in all
your innocent love schemes to the utmost of my poor
ability.”

“One good turn deserves another, you know; and I rely
upon your superior understanding to find out something about
this Mr. Lowe, which may be of service to me. Oh, I forgot!
The great Napoleon, learning that his sister has arrived, is to
make amends for some old affront, by inviting a party to play
whist at his house. I have arranged it so that you shall be
there, to make up the game. I detest it myself, and the old
gentleman cannot be relied upon. So I fear this infernal
Lowe will also be required.”

“Miss Wilsome will have him for her partner.”

“I feared it. I might get Col. Oakdale—but his hard
swearing and sudden impulses are not to be trusted.”

“How would old Mr. Dowley answer?”

“John Dowley? He could hardly be induced to ride
within a mile of the premises. He believes old Winkle is
mad, and should be confined. If the old maid insists upon
having Lowe, she cannot be baulked. But he must be closely
watched. Good-night. I will see the Emperor in the morning,
and cause him to dwell upon the idea of an Empress. I
will tender him my carriage to send for the ladies, You know
it requires four horses to drag his. There will be seats for
four—and you must contrive to occupy one of them.”

-- 052 --

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They parted, and pursued different directions. And a
third person, who had been listening in an arbor, separated
only by a plank fence from the street, glided into the cottage
to which the garden was attached. This was Lowe's old
housekeeper. She entered the young man's chamber, as she
was privileged to do at all times, without ceremony. Her
master was sitting at a table covered with books and papers,
where he had been writing. Seeing by the excited features of
his old servant that something out of the usual routine of domestic
occurrences was to be communicated, he leaned back
calmly in his great chair and awaited the issue.

The handsome features of Lowe did not undergo the slightest
alteration during the housekeeper's recital, with the exception
of a scarcely perceptible shade on his pale forehead,
flitting momentarily past, when the name of Lucy Winkle was
mentioned in connection with his own.

“You are discreet, Mrs. Edwards,” said Lowe, when she
ceased speaking. “I do not perceive any reason why I should
be disquieted by the surmises of the people, it is the case every
where. One's neighbors would know one's occupation, place
of nativity, means of support, objects and desires. Very well.
If I do not choose to tell them, let them guess. It cannot
annoy me. But it must not affect Miss Winkle's peace of
mind, either. Therefore, Edwards—No. I will remain. She
is a fine lovely girl, and as pure and amiable as lovely. I
have seen Mr. Roland. He is a bad man. Well, I have also
seen roués—often. Like the rest, he is a contriver of stratagems.
What is the name of the dirty-faced boy who delivered
the peace-offering to the aunt?”

“Bill Dizzle, your honor.”

“He, too, is employed by him. Where is he now?”

“In the kitchen with the cook, your honor.”

“I suppose so. The enemy's camp is the place for a spy.
But that lad is not bad by nature. Send him to me.”

The frog-catcher appeared at the door with his invariable
smile, his long locks, and his mud-colored cap on his head.

“Come in, Bill,” said Lowe, “I want a conversation with
you. Sit down. I believe I am your best customer in this
village, eh?”

“They say frogs is nasty!”

“And mushrooms?”

“They're afeard of being pisoned!”

-- 053 --

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“But you and I know better.'

“And Sargent Blore, and the emperor.”

“Yes. And do we consume all you can procure?”

“The sargent eats a dozen hind-quarters at a time—and
your ooman pays me four dollars a week. He! he! he! how
the butcher would stare if he knowed it! But Mrs. Edards
bound me not to tell. People say you must be poor, you
buy so little, and live in such a little house.”

“Be sure, Bizzle —”

“Dizzle—Biddy calls me Bizzle.”

“Well. Be sure always to make Mrs. Edwards pay you
the money down, so that if we run away, you will lose nothing.”

“I aint afeard. Sargent Blore says he'll pay Mrs. Edards'
debts if she can't. He says he's in love with her,'
cause she is sensible 'nuff to 'preciate frogs and mushroons—”

“The himpudent one-harmed, one-heyed, one-legged himp
of satan!” said Mrs. Edwards, coming in at that moment,
with some dew-moistened roses, and with a face flushed to the
eyebrows.

“Edwards,” said Lowe, smiling, “you must not be angry
with the sergeant for admiring you. You can't prevent it,
and he can't help it.”

“She's gone, like a shot,” said Bill, as the old woman
vanished muttering something to herself.

“You must not say a word about this to the sergeant,
Dizzle.”

“No, sir. If I was to, he'd be dead sure to come and
marry her in spite of herself. I know his natur, sir.”

“Eh? Then you may tell him. I should like to witness
the progress of such a siege. But, Bill, don't Mr. Roland
sometimes throw profitable jokes in your way?”

“He's always paying me for doing something or other.
He's a rich gentleman—and he's good to me and my sister.”

“Your sister?”

“Yes. He let's her have her cabin and patch for nothing.
I stay with her sometimes, and sometimes at the emperor's.
I would like to stay here a little, too, if you've no objection.”

“I have none in the world. But why would you like to
stay here a little?”

“'Cause Patty O'Pan, in the kitchen, is good to me; and

-- 054 --

[figure description] Page 054.[end figure description]

she shows me how to cook frogs in every way—and she knows
a mushroon from a frog-stool—and she lets me buss her.”

“Buss her? What's that? Oh, I recollect. I suppose
that's one of her sauces. But your sister—has she a family?”

“Only one—a little gal. I don't know where it's from, or
how it come there. Them two and me is all.”

“Is she a widow?”

“She wasn't never married, sir, that I knows on.”

“Oh, I forgot that. Then, Mr. Roland likes you to tell
him all the news you hear, and all the things you see, and he
pays you for your trouble?”

“Yes, sir. But Mrs. Edards won't say anything, and
Patty O'Pan don't know nothing.”

“But you can see for yourself.”

“I see only you, and your books, and such things. But
that's not what he wants.”

“What does he want?”

“He wants to find out if you aint a counterfeiter, a
gambler, a robber, a murderer, or something of that sort.”

“And do you think I am any of these, Bill?” asked Lowe,
smiling.

“Blazes! No. You're a gentleman, and a nicer one nor
him.”

“Thank you, Dizzle. There's a dollar. Now remember,
we are to be good friends, and you shall come when you choose
to see my Patty Pan—”

“I called her that once, sir, and she slapped my jaws.”

“O'Pan, then. But you must not repeat my conversation
to him.”

“I won't tell only what you want me to.”

“You may say I am very poor, and can't get any employment.
That will do.”

“La! I saw you pitch out the trout once! and knock
down the ducks right and left as they sailed round! If you'd
only go in partnership with me, and let me sell 'em in the city,
we'd make a fortin!”

“We'll talk that over some other time. Good-by, now.”

Bill bowed unconsciously and withdrew.

-- 055 --

p459-072 CHAPTER VI. THE WINKLE CHATEAU—THE GAME RESUMED.

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Mr. Roland's carriage, containing Miss Wilsome Winkle and
her neice, Mr. Lowe and Gusset, drove up to the portico of
Mr. Napoleon Winkle's fine mansion. Sentinels, in trappings
resembling the uniform of the imperial guard, were promenading
in front. These were some of Mr. Winkle's tenantry,
who had been drilled that morning by Sergeant Blore.

Mr. Winkle was seated in his great chair in his library,
looking over sundry charts spread out on a table. He was
dressed in the old style, wearing tight breeches, silk stockings,
and shoes and buckles. We have said he was fat. He was
also nearly bald.

When the company was announced, he arose and advanced
with dignity. But the one whom he first accosted with friendly
greeting was Gusset.

“Why, brother,” said Miss Wilsome, “where are your
glasses? That is Gusset! Don't you know me?

“Certainly I do, sister,” he replied, shaking her hand very
heartily—“I did not look at her face, and supposed it was my
niece.”

“She don't resemble Lucy. But let me introduce Mr.
Lowe, my partner at whist.”

“I am happy to see you, Mr. Lowe,” said Mr. Winkle,
with great politeness; and then, a moment after, added:
“Lowe—Lowe—I have heard that name before—”

“Oh, very likely, sir, as I have been residing in Babbleton
a number of weeks,” remarked the young man.

“Lowe! I hope, sir, your first name is not Hudson?”

“It is not, sir. It is Edmund.”

“You are not a son of Sir Hudson's?”

“I am not, indeed,” continued Lowe, smiling.

“What nonsense, brother,” said Miss Wilsome. “Sir
Hudson was a middle-aged man when Governor of St. Helena;
and as Bonaparte died a quarter of a century ago—”

“Very true, Wilsome—very true. Come, have my arm.
The table is in the next room, and the cards and counters on

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it. And there are refreshments on the sideboard. Let the
young people follow.”

“Where is Mr Roland?” asked Wilsome, looking round
in vain for that gentleman, upon entering the room in which
they were to play.

“I have a note from him,” said her brother, fumbling
for it in his vest pocket. “He says he has been suddenly
called away in a matter of great urgency and importance; and
that he may not possibly be able to return before the evening.”

“No matter!” said Wilsome, in her masculine voice.
“He pays no attention to the game. What shall we do?
Lucy is not fond of whist, and would rather be rambling about
the grounds. Mr. Lowe plays admirably, but he is my partner.
How shall we be matched?”

“I'll have Miss Gusset—and see if we don't beat you the
first rubber! Where is she? Left in the library! What
barbarians we are! But, n'importe; I will conduct her
hither.”

Mr. Napoleon Winkle withdrew for that purpose, and
seemed to remain away something longer than his sister
deemed necessary, and she awaited him with a fretful impatience,
while Lucy and Lowe admired the prospect from a
window.

The lagging behind in the library had not been accidental
on the part of Gusset. But what transpired there, between
herself and Mr. Winkle, must remain among the undeveloped
secrets of diplomacy, for there were no witnesses present to
divulge it. Yet it might have been surmised from the agreeable
expression of their countenances when they finally appeared
and assumed their places at the table, that the brief conference
which had been held, like that of the famous emperors at Tilsit,
had not been an unpleasant one.

When they commenced the game, Lucy escaped through
the large French window, and was soon careering over the
lawn, followed by her faithful spaniel. When, panting with
the exercise, and laden with roses, she ascended a small knoll
a hundred paces from the house, and rested in a turret or pavilion,
which had been constructed by her uncle for his own
convenience. This small isolated building, resembling a lighthouse,
in having windows on every side, was so thickly overgrown
with vines that one could view from within it every field

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on the plantation (or country in Europe), and remain himself
unseen. From this place most of (the Winkles) Napoleon's orders
of a military character were issued.

Lucy, amidst the perfume of her roses and honeysuckles,
the thrilling echoes of the orioles from the tall elms, the pure
sunlight of a calm day, the harmonious buzzing of insects
through the peaceful air, yielded to the influence of the moment,
and almost unconsciously warbled one of the happy
songs which occasionally gushed forth from her innocent heart.

“Why, Dew!” said she, ceasing abruptly in the midst of a
stanza, as she heard a low growl from her spaniel; “that is a
horrid accompaniment. If my ditty is displeasing, you shall
hear no more of it. What is the matter? How his eyes do
gleam! Dew!” The spaniel sprang up and barked fiercely;
and the next moment Mr. Ralph Roland emerged from a cluster
of lilac bushes near the pavilion.

“Be quiet, Dew,” said he. “Don't you know me?” he continued,
ascending the steps of the pavilion, and casting a halfcareless
glance at the still threatening dog, as it growled and
whined after returning to the feet of its mistress.

“Mr. Roland,” said Lucy, “I thought you were to be absent
to-day. Did you not say so in a note to my uncle?”

“I did, my dear creature,” said he, throwing himself into
a rustic seat beside her; “but it was merely a stratagem for
your benefit.”

My benefit! How, sir?”

“You know, if I had been present, your aunt would have
compelled me to play; and so you would have been under the
necessity of entertaining your uncle, or of being entertained by
him.”

“And I assure you I am always very agreeably entertained
by him! Yet I am not quite certain your presence would
have released my uncle from the game. He seemed to be enjoying
it very heartily when I left them.”

“Oh, Gusset was his partner!”

“How did you know that? Mr. Roland, it seems to me
very mysterious, that you should be observing what passes in
the house—or chateau, as my uncle calls it—remaining yourself
unseen. And, then, appearing suddenly before me from a
covert, unannounced—”

“Dew announced me,” said he, smiling, and taking up one
of the roses Lucy had dropped.

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“Yes, he announced you; but it was no friendly greeting.
I have some faith in Dew's discernment.”

“Upon my soul,” said Roland, laughing, “I am inclined
to believe you are serious, for you have done nothing but
frown ever since you beheld me.”

“And Dew has never ceased to show his teeth,” said she.

“Oh, I will love Dew, if he will permit me. You recollect
the saying—`Love me, love my dog.' But, seriously, my
dear Miss Winkle, whether it shall ever be my good fortune
to conciliate Dew or not, believe me, upon the honor of a man,
that I have long loved you—”

“Mr. Roland!” cried she, attempting to rise, while Dew,
not knowing whether or not his mistress was held contrary to
her will, crouched at her feet, his eyes fixed with a steady
fierceness upon Roland's face.

“Stay, my sweet Lucy,” said Roland. “You know I am
rich. I am not old. All I possess—my heart, my hand, my
fortune—are at your feet— Deuce take the dog!” cried he,
starting up, and shaking Dew from the skirt of his coat, upon
which the animal had fastened. Feeling himself slightly
bruised by the teeth of the dog, he bestowed a smart kick upon
him, and sent him yelping under Lucy's chair.

“Mr. Roland—leave me!” said Lucy.

“Be not offended, my sweet girl,” continued the wooer.
“My proposals are honorable, and you shall be—”

“Say no more, sir. It is distressing to me. I cannot love
you. Let that suffice.”

“You might, in time. But if you did not, that would be
my misfortune. As for yourself, be assured I love you now,
have loved you long, and would continue to do so for ever.”

“Cease, cease this conversation, Mr. Roland; and let me
return to the house. It is painful to hear you. I would not
have you love me, and you can never have either my heart or
my hand.”

“Cruel Lucy! But you are now discomposed. Calm reflection,
and the advice of your family, may change your mind.
Recollect that you may be disappointed in your expectations.
Your aunt is capricious, and your uncle may marry.”

“Sir, my mother's humble dwelling would be preferable to
all the wealth in the world, if obtained by means of an alliance
with one whose presence would be an unceasing source of disgust
and misery!”

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“Unjust and unreasonable girl! Think that the humble
dwelling and the few pitiful acres you allude to, do not belong
to your mother.”

“How, sir?”

“The property is encumbered. There is a mortgage on it
for three-fourths its value. Then be not so disdainful. You
are poor, and I am rich.”

“Release me, sir!” continued Lucy, striving in vain to
escape, while Dew continued to bark. “If I am poor, sir, I
am independent. Beware how you insult me.”

“I do not insult you, my dearest girl,” said Roland. “I
would save you from the sneers of the world. The offer I
make cannot be deemed an insult. I would save you—”

“From what, sir? Nobody has sneered at me.”

“I would save you from the fatal toils of an impostor—”

“Who?”

“That man now sitting opposite your aunt. You know
not who he is—whence he comes—his occupation—his character—”

“Sir, you do insult me—or at least you grossly offend, by
such gratuitous declaration!” said Lucy, blushing deeply, and
then turning deathly pale.

“I see how it is, Lucy. I should have warned you sooner.
I will release you now. I desire you will consult your mother
and your uncle. In their hands and yours I place my hopes.
Farewell—or if we meet again to-day, pray banish that
frown.”

“Mr. Roland,” replied the girl, now released, but no longer
inclined to fly, “leave me to my solitary meditations. But,
before you go, be assured that I will never love or wed you.
It will not be necessary for me to mention the subject to any
one, unless you resolve to persecute me with your addresses,
which would only give me pain. My mother and uncle, whatever
might be their opinion or desire, would never attempt to
constrain me to any step repugnant to my wishes. Therefore,
if you would have my respect and friendship, never again refer
to the subject.”

“At least, you can have no objection,” said Roland, throwing
a scrutinizing glance at the fair girl as he departed, “to
my unmasking the impostor who has taken such convenient
lodgings in Babbleton?”

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“I have no right to object, sir, to any thing in which I am
not interested.”

“Then why that change of color, Lucy?”

“I see it not, sir. Mr. Roland, take care that you do not
injure an innocent person! Mr. Lowe is not the base man
you suppose. Beware how you assail a stranger, of whom you
know nothing, upon the mere conjectures of the idle gossips
of the village! However, I doubt not he will be prepared to
vindicate himself, whenever any one shall venture to charge
him with the commission of a criminal act. And until he
fails to repel any such affronts upon his character, rely upon
it, he will be received as a welcome guest at my mother's
humble dwelling.”

When she ceased speaking, Roland retired without uttering
any reply; and the brave girl immediately bestowed all
her attention upon poor Dew, whom she caressed for his timely
defence of his mistress.

Soon after Roland might have been seen galloping through
a distant lane towards his own estate. And at intervals messengers
on horseback were sent by Sergeant Blore, from different
parts of the Winkle empire, with despatches for his
chief. So that a continual clatter of hoofs was kept up during
the progress of the game.

CHAPTER VII. THE GAME INTERRUPTED BY THE NEWS OF A SUDDEN INVASION.

Read that despatch for me, partner,” said Mr. Winkle,
passing a small square piece of paper across the table to Gusset.
It had just been brought in by one of Sergeant Blore's
messengers.

“Why don't you read it yourself?” asked Wilsome, lifting
her eyes from the cards in her hand.

“Because, sister, I left my glasses in my cabinet; and although
I can distinguish the knave of hearts without them, I
would find it difficult to decipher Blore's confounded crabbed
pencil scratches. And I doubt whether you could do it

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without your spectacles, which I am sure you are ashamed to wear
in company.”

“I am not ashamed, brother.”

Gusset reads: “The old boar and a flock of crows are
eating the dead horse in the north fields.

“What does that mean, brother?” demanded Miss Wilsome.

“It means that the Russians and the Cossacks are nibbling
again at the Pole. No matter, so they don't disturb
Saxony. Such is my answer.”

As the game proceeded, the following additional notes
were received, and read by the milliner, while Mr. Lowe, with
much difficulty, preserved his gravity.

The Billy goats are fighting again on the hill.

“The Swiss!” said Mr. Winkle. “The cantons are
never quiet. They will have to be absorbed. Tell Blore
to have them chastised, and warned. He may fire a few platoons
with blank cartridge.”

After this a long silence ensured, and Gusset played a
great many trumps, which, with the four honors she held,
won the game.

“It is my turn to shuffle. There will be no more such
hands!” said Miss Wilsome, casting an ill-natured glance at
the milliner. It is game and game. This time we will win
the rubber.”

And it seemed that the prediction so confidently made,
was about to be fulfilled; for the first hand won nine tricks.
The honors were divided between Miss Wilsome and her partner,
as well as all the valuable cards.

It was just when Miss Wilsome was exulting over such
signal success, and anticipating a speedy triumph, that one of
the sentinels ran in and made the following announcement,
which he said the sergeant did not have time to write:

“The bull's swam across the slough, sir, and is trying to
get into the orchard among the cows.”

“We are invaded! The British! The British!” cried
the old man, leaping up and overturning the table. “My
these! My horse!” he continued, rushing out upon the lawn.
“Bring up the guards! Sound the alarm! To the field! Follow
me, soldiers! The enemy is upon our soil!”

Consternation prevailed. The drum beat to arms, and
the sentinels fired their muskets; and before Miss Wilsome

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had sufficiently recovered from her paroxysm of passion to
utter a word, her excited brother was in the saddle, and galloping
towards the enemy, at the head of a small party of his
retainers. They soon reached the scene of the invasion, which
was plainly in view from the pavilion, and where Lucy was
joined by her aunt and her partner, as well as by Gusset.

The orchard fence ran parallel with the narrow sheet of
water which separated France from England, as laid down on
Mr. Winkle's map. The latter country, a marsh meadow, was
usually inhabited by the bull, but he was occasionally in the
habit of making incursions upon the neighboring tracts.

The enormous animal was now throwing up the earth with
his feet, and bellowing fearfully, while the herd of cows and
heifers within the inclosure, so far from being alarmed at
his presence, had drawn nearer to the fence which separated
them.

On rushed Napoleon, followed by his little band of heroes.
But, fearless and obedient as they had often proved on other occasions,
they faltered on this, when they perceived, that instead
of being panic-stricken, the bull faced about and coolly awaited
the attack. Turning his head, and seeing the hesitation
among his followers, Winkle drew rein and ordered them to
come up. They did so very reluctantly.

“Soldiers!” said he, “let me not have cause to be offended
at your conduct this day. The eyes of my guests in yonder
pavilion are upon us!”

“But that dratted bull looks like he wanted to poke some
of us,” said one of the guard.

“What then?” exclaimed the furious Winkle. “Are victories
won without risk of wounds, and even death? Would
you purchase glory without paying its price in blood? I am
ashamed of you! Surrender your gun into the hands of that
boy in front. Retire in disgrace from the field. You are ignominiously
dismissed! Comrades,” he continued, “advance
and fire. And when you have discharged your guns, charge
yourselves upon the enemy. He will fly before you!”

They formed a line in front of the bull, extending from
the fence down the water's edge, and levelling their guns, fired
as they had been ordered. But when the smoke cleared away,
instead of seeing the bull in full retreat, they beheld him rushing
directly towards them, his head down, and his tail rampant
over his back. Winkle continued to spur forward, but

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his followers took to their heels and fled away. Some leaped
the fence and climbed the apple trees, while others never
paused until they were under shelter of the castle. All threw
away their arms.

It must be owned that Winkle was not insensible to some
symptoms of trepidation when he beheld the great eyes of his
foe glaring upon him. But the eyes in the pavilion were upon
him also, and it would not do to fly; and although several instances
occurred to his mind wherein his great prototype had
embraced the means in his power to escape a sudden peril,
still he resolved to face the infuriated animal. Yet it should
not perhaps be denied, that he had some hope of a reconciliation
at the last moment, forgetting that the fatal affront had
already been given by himself, in offending the nostrils of his
enemy with the fumes of sulphur. Therefore, that nothing on
his part might be omitted, as soon as his followers had receded
out of hearing, he commenced his overtures as follows: “Come
Johnny, my fine fellow, you have taken salt from my hand
many a time. Be quiet, now—my fine fellow.” Johnny recognized
his master and paused in mid-career, and in the centre
of the road, but still kept his head down in a menacing
attitude. Long he remained thus, as motionless as a statue,
while a low moan escaped him resembling the deep mutterings
preceding an earthquake.

Winkle, supposing the victory gained, deliberately dismounted
from his horse, and approached Johnny on foot, as
he had often done before, for the purpose of caressing him.
But it did not occur to him that he had never attempted to
approach the animal with a broad scarlet sash enveloping his
chest. Hence, when he was within a few paces of his huge
minion, he was astonished to see him leap forward to meet him
more like the spring of a tiger upon a lamb than the motion
of friendly greeting. Winkle turned, and fled with all his
might, without pausing to reflect upon the consequences of
such an example. But he was too fat to escape by means of
his own locomotion; and his steed, taking the alarm, had fled
away in advance!

On ran Winkle, and after him the bull, while cries of alarm
proceeded from the pavilion, and curses were uttered by Sergeant
Blore, who strove in vain to rally the men.

At last Winkle gave up in despair, and fell down upon his
face, just at the moment when the bull had slightly turned

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aside one of his huge horns for the purpose of transfixing him.
Escaping immediate death by his opportune relinquishment of
the field, Winkle nevertheless felt the point of the horn glance
harmlessly over the posterior portion of his body. But it
ploughed along under the broad scarlet sash, and a moment
after the corpulent hero was dangling in the air! Enraged
to desperation upon finding that his victim could not be easily
detached from his new position, the great monster ran frantically
to and fro along the margin of the water, still bearing
his captive aloft, whose legs and arms were in continual motion,
as if swimming in ether. And now the bull was followed backwards
and forwards by all the cows and heifers in the orchard,
and by all the terriers of the neighborhood, which kept up a
continual clatter at his heels. The only words the poor man
was heard to utter were, “Help! help! rescue! rescue!”

Witnessing such a scene from the pavilion, Mr. Lowe,
touched by the distress of Lucy, united his endeavors with
those of Sergeant Blore to induce the men to go to the relief
of their chieftain. But to no purpose. They were immovable,
and the sergeant himself could do nothing, having but one
leg, one eye, and one arm.

“Then let loose yonder bull-dog,” cried Lowe, “and bid
him follow me!”

Saying this, the young man seized a sheet which had been
spread out on the grass by the washerwoman, and ran off
towards the scene of action. As soon as the bull beheld him
he prepared for battle. Pawing up the earth, and bellowing
furiously, the enormous monster came down at full speed,
with Winkle still dangling from his right hand horn. Lowe
was self-possessed. He adjusted the sheet upon his arm in
the manner he had seen the Spaniards do, and when the critical
moment arrived, succeeded admirably in throwing it over
the animal's head, and in making his escape by springing dexterously
aside. The bull, being thus foiled, and blinded by
the sheet, shook his head violently, and Winkle flew through
the air like some great fragment cast up by a raging volcano.
He sailed over the prickly bushes on the margin of the ditch,
and fell head foremost among the spatter-docks, which grew
half in mud and half in water. The place where he fell was
as soft as a bed of down. But he came very near alighting
upon the head of Bill Dizzle, who was so intently engaged in

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the pursuit of a large frog, that he had not heeded the uproar
in the vicinity.

“Blue blazes! What a tremendous frog!” cried Bill,
when Winkle dropped into the ditch, bespattering him all over,
and filling his eyes with filthy water, so that for several moments
he was incapable of seeing any thing.

“No! it's a turkle!” said he, when he had succeeded in
wiping the muddy water from his eyes, and beheld the crown
of Winkle's head emerging from the broad leaves of the spatter
docks. Both the cocked hat and the wig of Napoleon had
been lost, and his bald head having been submerged, really
resembled in color and shape the back of a turtle or terapin.

“No! Blazes!—no!” continued Bill. “It's—it's—blazes!
what is it?”

“It's Winkle, Bill. Help me out of the ditch. Take me
by the hand and lead me. I cannot see.”

“So it is! Oh, gonny! what a black face! Take holt of
the prongs of my spear, sir.”

“Wait a moment, Bill. See if the bull is near us.”

Bill crept under the bushes towards the road and witnessed
the finale of the scene.

The bull, finding himself relieved of the burden which had
in some degree embarrassed his movements, soon tore off the
sheet that obstructed his vision, and more enraged than ever,
rushed upon his new assailant. But Lowe avoided him by
springing behind a tough hickory sapling which grew on the
side of the road. Although the young tree was not greater
in diameter than a man's leg, yet it sufficed to repel the assaults
of the frantic animal. Whenever the bull made a lunge,
the elastic sapling, after yielding an instant to the force of
the blow, would rebound with such power as to throw back the
animal on his haunches. The bull, supposing this to be the
resistance of his antagonist, grew more incensed than ever,
and redoubled his assaults. Finally the young tree was yielding
under the effects of such repeated thrusts, and ceased to
repel them with the vigor it did at first, and Lowe, expecting
every instant to see his only remaining defence prostrated, was
upon the eve of giving up all for lost, when he heard the short
deep barking of the bull-dog. A moment after, he saw the
teeth of his brindle deliverer fastened upon the cheek of the
bull. Uttering a startling yell, the huge monster threw up
his head so violently that the flesh was torn away, and the dog

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went sailing over the bushes, and fell sprawling into the ditch
beside its master.

“Blazes!” cried Bill, who had retreated back to his first
position—“the frogs will be frightened for a month!”

Meantime the bull was smarting with the would he had
received, and instead of renewing the attack upon Lowe,
gazed towards the ditch, as if to ascertain whether the dog
was hors de combat. But hearing Brindle's sharp bark as
soon as his head was above water, the great bull, now stricken
with terror, turned about and began to retreat. Brindle,
however, sprang from under the bushes and seized him on the
other cheek, and this time he held him so firmly that he could
not be shaken off. The bull roared, and rolled in the dust;
but Brindle would not relinquish his hold. Finally, seeing
the sergeant at last rallying his forces, which had been successfully
appealed to by Lucy to rescue her uncle and the
young gentleman, the animal gave up the contest, and rushed
into the deepest part of the water, where, by dint of submerging
his head, the half-drowned dog was forced to open his
jaws. The bull then escaped into his own territory.

Lucy, when she witnessed the expulsion of the bull, supposing
her uncle might be slain, and not knowing that Lowe
had escaped without injury, was overwhelmed with tumultuous
palpitations, and fainted in the arms of her aunt. Now,
Wilsome had done nothing but abuse her brother from the
moment he abandoned the game, when she was upon the eve
of winning the rubber. And she was in no pleasant humor
with Lowe for joining in the foolish fracas, as she termed it.
More than once she had proposed that the game should be
concluded with a dummy, as her brother's card had been exposed.
Her own cards were still grasped in her hand when
Lucy fainted.

“Unlace her, Gusset,” said Miss Wilsome, with petulance.
“Throw out the roses, and empty the vase of water in her
face—but don't spill any of it on my dress.”

Gusset obeyed with trembling hands, a livid hue, and
chattering teeth.

“She is reviving,” said Wilsome. “It wasn't much. My
brother is not killed, I know—but if he should be, what else
could he except, always firing off guns, and fancying boars
are Russians, and bulls the British. I am his sister, it is
true—but I could not lament his death as much as a sister

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ought, if he were to lose his life in any of these mad pranks.
Besides, I abominate black, and have made up my mind never
to go into mourning. So, if my brother's neck be broken by
the bull—” Here she paused, and placing Lucy in the
rustic arm-chair, steadily regarded Gusset, who was gasping.

“Why, Gusset!” she exclaimed, “what in the world are
you doing? Are you going to swoon, too? He's nothing to
you! I tell you what it is—if you have the ill-manners to
faint before my face, I shall go off and leave you to recover
the best way you can! It is an impudent, indecent habit! I
never fainted. So, now, you have some color. But pick up
your cards; they fell with the backs up, and I did not see
them. The game must be played out. Mercy on us!” she
continued, as she beheld her brother approaching on foot,
covered completely with the black mud of the marsh, and followed
by the whole rabble of his retainers, ever and anon
uttering loud huzzas.

“Oh, thank heaven, he is safe!” said Lucy.

“Safe!” cried her aunt. “Do you call him safe in that
predicament? He had better be dead, than live in such a
pickle as that.”

“The mud can soon be removed!” cried Gusset, rising,
and seemingly about to rush forward and assist in the purification
of the discomfited chieftain.

“What do you mean, Gusset?” asked Miss Wilsome, and
at the same time thrusting back the milliner.” If you stir a
step towards him and soil your hands, I'll send you home,
madam. I am mistress here, I would have you know. The
game must be finished. Let Blore take his master to the
pump, and we'll play with a dummy.”

“Fortunately no injury has been done!” said Lowe, entering
the pavilion.

“He upset my basket of frogs,” said Bill Dizzle, following,
“and they all swam away.”

“I'm glad of it,” said Miss Wilsome; “and I hope you
may never catch them again.” Bill gave her a look of mingled
astonishment and contempt, and then withdrew.

“You, too, were in great peril,” said Lucy, addressing
Lowe.

“I confess that when I saw the roots of the friendly sapling
yielding to the furious assaults of the animal, I measured

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the height of the fence with my eye, hoping to be able to
clear it at one bound. I think I could have done so.”

While her brother was undergoing the prescribed ablution
at the pump, Wilsome insisted upon the game being played
out with a dummy. But when they were seated at the table,
it was discovered that a card was missing; and luckily for the
rest, it was one which had fallen from Miss Wilsome's own
hand. It could not be found, and so a new pack was called
for, and a new deal submitted to.

But before the thirteenth card had been dealt to Dummy,
Mr. Napoleon Winkle made his appearance among them, in
fresh costume, and resumed his seat opposite Miss Griselda
Gusset.

“Having had a tilt with Johnny Bull,” said he, in high
spirits, “we will now have a bout with the four kings.”

“Brother, how can you treat a serious matter so lightly,”
asked Miss Wilsome. “If you had witnessed the fainting
scene in the pavilion, after your flight over the hedge—”

“You did not faint, did you, sister?”

“I!”

“But who did?”

“Lucy—and—”

“Lucy, then, feared to lose her uncle?”

“Certainly, uncle,” said Lucy.

“You are my pet. But did any one else faint?”

“Gusset would have fainted, if I had permitted it,” said
Miss Wilsome. “And I am sure I don't know why she
should have done so.”

Mr. Winkle cast a meaning glance at Gusset, who kept
her eyes fixed upon the cards and remained silent.

“As for my part,” said Mr. Lowe, “I must crave Mr.
Winkle's pardon.”

“What for?” asked Mr. Winkle.

“I thought you had surely observed my inexcusable conduct,
sir, at the moment when I encountered the foe.”

“It was my salvation. You did a meritorious action,
which I shall never forget. You saved my life, sir, and I
would be happy to see you an inmate of my family, sir. Why
not abandon your little tenement, and live with me? You
may command any thing that is mine, sir.”

“If you were to do any such thing,” said Wilsome, “it

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would not be two months before you would be fit for a madhouse.”

“Pooh, sister!” said Winkle, “you have your cards, your
monkeys, your cats and parrots—every thing but a husband—
and I have my peculiar amusements. Then why do you continually
denounce my diversions, and term them the result of
insanity? It is simply because you have an idiosyncrasy
yourself! Oh, I have been reading a work on madness! I
know the symptoms. But, Mr. Lowe—I know you are not
Sir Hudson, now—why should you crave my pardon?”

“For my laughter. I could not avoid giving vent to it
when I met you borne aloft on the bull's horn.”

“Nor no human being could have refrained from it,” said
Miss Wilsome, smiling significantly at her partner.

“Lucy refrained, and so did Miss Griselda!” said Napoleon.

“Gusset thought it her humble duty to follow Lucy's
swooning example—but I arrested her in time.”

“If your monkey had been in my predicament,” continued
her brother, “I doubt not you would have manifested more
concern.”

“Jocko? Bless my life! I believe I came away without
locking his chain to my bed-post. And he would not permit
any one else to do it! I shall be uneasy until I get back to
the city.”

“Here are the city papers,” said Mr. Winkle, taking them
from the hand of one of his servants just returned from the
village. “And here is a letter for you, Wilsome. Perhaps
it contains some account of your dear monkey.”

And it did. The old lady, in her eagerness to learn the
contents of the letter, forgetting the presence of her partner,
adjusted her glasses, and putting down the cards, read as
follows:

My Dear Aunt:—It becomes my melancholy duty to
announce a sad calamity—an unexpected suicide—which must
affect you deeply. This morning poor Jocko was found suspended
from the eve of the portico, and quite dead. That he
did it himself, must be evident from the fact that no human
being would be likely to climb down to the edge of the roof.
It seems that he had driven a large nail into the wood through
the last link of his chain, and then sprang over, either

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dislocuting his neck, or producing suffocation. I could not hear
his struggles, from the distant chamber I occupied, or you
should not have been called upon to lament his untimely end.
Poor Jocko! As the weather is very warm, I will have his
body taken down and packed in ice. It will keep, dear aunt,
until I receive your instructions, in regard to the disposition
you would have made of it. Every thing shall be done according
to your orders. You need not hasten your return to
the city. I am quite comfortable here, and the house is kept
very quiet from morning till night. My love to mother, sister,
uncle, all.

Your affectionate Nephew,
Walter Winkle. P. S.—The parrot has learnt some new words. He must
have heard the neighbors utter them, as you know parrots
merely imitate sounds without understanding the meaning of
language. Tell uncle Napoleon I have bought him another
mortar for throwing large shells, and will ship it immediately.
Say to Mr. Lowe, I have found some flies that will make the
trout jump into the grass. Tell old Gusset half the buttons
are off the shirts she made me.”

“Old? The ungrateful whelp!” cried Gusset.

“Gusset!” said Miss Wilsome, putting down the letter
which she had been unconsciously reading aloud, and weeping
bitter tears all the while—“how dare you call any member of
my family a whelp? Do you forget that the Winkles made
you what you are?”

“I humbly beg pardon, madam,” said Gusset, in a quivering
voice. “I was merely jesting.”

“I thought so, by Jove!” cried the emperor. “She was
not in earnest, sister. Miss Griselda is famous for her mild
temper, and amiability of disposition. And Walter meant
nothing. He is a noble boy—and may this right hand forget
its cunning when I forget him—”

“Walter has always been my pet,” said Gusset.

“That's right—love him for my sake.”

“Bring my bonnet! I must go!” cried Miss Wilsome,
rising. “I shall never survive it. My heart is broken. Poor
Jocko!”

“Don't, sister, don't indulge such ridiculous lamentations

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over a nasty monkey, after regarding unmoved the narrow
escape of your brother from a dreadful death.”

“My bonnet! Brother, Jocko was both more rational and
affectionate than yourself.”

“I supposed you would say so. There is but one woman
living capable of appreciating me—”

“Who?” demanded his sister.

“Not you—but you shall know some of these days.”

“Your uncle intends to marry,” Lowe whispered in Lucy's
ear—“and it may be the wisest thing he could do, for—”

“Mr. Lowe!” said Miss Wilsome, “will you not attend
me to the carriage?”

“Oh, certainly!” was the reply. And rising, the young
gentleman conducted the aunt and niece out of the room,
leaving Mr. Napoleon Winkle and the retired milliner, who
had won the rubber at last, to follow at their leisure. But
their leisure seeming to be too much prolonged, Miss Wilsome
despatched several messengers to hasten them; and
Gusset was finally handed into the coach by no less a gallant
than the great proprietor of the palace.

During the drive back to the village, Lucy and Lowe conjecturing
the nature of each other's thoughts—the tragical
end of the monkey—could not avoid exchanging mirthful
glances, which being perceived by Miss Wilsome, they were
rebuked in this manner.

“How indifferent you both seem to my affiction. Jocko
was dearer to me than many a husband is to his wife. He
was obedient, silent, and watchful; and quite as handsome as
some of the beaux who captivate our poor hearts. In another
year I would have learnt him to play whist, and then I should
have been contented with my lot. I suppose the law would
not have permitted him to have my fortune—and in that case
you would have inherited it, Lucy. But now I have lost my
Jocko, and you a fortune—for I will certainly marry.”

Lucy and Lowe strove to elongate their faces upon hearing
this announcement—but in vain.

-- 072 --

p459-089 CHAPTER VIII. MATRIMONIAL SALLIES—WAR AND WOMEN.

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Arrived at the cottage of Mrs. Winkle in Babbleton, the
company dispersed as follows. Gusset, who had not opened
her mouth, although her eyes looked volumes, since she had
been escorted down the broad stairway of the chateau by the
emperor, hastened away on foot to her own domicile, without
once casting a glance behind. Edmund Lowe, after assisting
the ladies to alight, strode deliberately across the street to
his own dwelling. Miss Wilsome Winkle, with a freshet of
tears, washing gullies through the paint on her cheeks, hastened
up to her chamber to enjoy in solitude the luxury of
mourning the loss of a beloved object.

Mrs. Winkle, drawing Lucy's arm through her own, led
her into the rear sitting room, laughing at the aspect of her
sister-in-law, and at the mishap of her brother, which had been
narrated to her by an eye-witness.

“Sit down, Lucy,” said the merry widow. “I am glad
we are alone. You must know, that while you have been
enjoying yourselves in the country, I have been entertained in
town. Mr. Ralph Roland has spent several hours with me—
child! why do you turn pale at the mention of his name?
No! my eyes deceived me—you have a beautiful color—but
surely I can hear the beating of your heart. I say Mr. Roland
was here, and—”

“Proposed to marry me. Was it not so, mother?”

“No—not precisely so. But he desired my permission to
woo you.”

“And did he obtain it?”

“Not positively. But I promised to confer with you. I
thought the fellow was addressing Virginia Oakdale.”

“He addresses all who will permit him. I cannot permit
him to address me, mother. There is something in his smile,
in his looks, in his attitudes and movements, which fills me
with dread and dislike.”

“He is somewhat advanced in years, too; I think he
must be forty. My dear child, never think I would desire
you to agree to any match repugnant to your inclinations.

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Nevertheless, Roland is called a handsome man—is rich, and
if not popular, it is thought, notwithstanding, his party will
succeed in electing him to Congress. On the other hand, my
child, it is my duty to apprise you that you have no fortune.
Even this little property is mortgaged for four thousand dollars—
and the mortgage is held by Mr. Roland—”

“Oh, mother!” cried Lucy.

“Why do you tremble so? why this alarm, my dear Lucy?
Have we not been merry in our poverty? Wealth could not
have made us more happy. Besides, we are not so destitute
as to be altogether dependent. Old Dibble, our gardener,
has sold eight hundred dollars worth of vegetables since winter.
He has found out all about my condition, and this mortgage
too, and he says there is always a balance to our credit
in bank sufficient to pay the interest.”

“Thank heaven! Then he cannot distress us!” said
Lucy.

“Who, child?”

“Roland. Mother, he is a bad man, and I would not be in
his power for worlds. But we need not be alarmed. Uncle
Napoleon—”

“Mr. Roland informs me that it is the determination of
your uncle to marry. If this be so, we must not rely upon
receiving further aid from that quarter. Your uncle, I know,
has a very generous disposition; but his wife may be differently
constituted. Your aunt—”

“Oh, mother, she too is resolved to marry. She announced
her purpose to-day.”

“Married or single—she could never be relied on. She
has too many strange caprices of minor importance, to bestow
a thought upon the necessities of her relatives. Besides, she
never can be convinced that your father lost his fortune. She
cannot conceive how it could be possible for the most respected
and ablest member of her family to lose his patrimony.”

“Then, mother,” said Lucy. “I fear the worst!”

“Fear nothing. If Roland supposes that our destitution
may make you submissive to a matrimonial project not having
your hearty concurrence—”

“Mother—I despise the man!” said Lucy, proudly, and
decisively.

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“Enough, Lucy. He shall be properly answered. But,
my child, we must be kind and respectful. Remember—”

“The mortgage! yes, I will remember it, mother—and
for your sake, I will endeavor not to offend him.”

“For my sake, Lucy!” cried Mrs. Winkle, laughing very
heartily. “Why I have no fears. Providence will not forsake
me. Old Dibble and his son never fail to raise enormous
crops of potatoes, cabbages, peas, etc., when such things are
scarce and high. I suppose if we pay the interest, there can
be no danger of being turned adrift. And yet, my child, Mr.
Roland named one thing which caused me a pang of fearful
apprehension.”

“What was it, mother?”

“His belief that our pale neighbor, Mr. Lowe, had a
design upon your heart.”

“I thought so! He said the same thing to me.”

“To you? He did not mention having conversed with
you in relation to such matters?”

“He had an interview with me, first; and if I had sanctioned
his pretensions, he would never have sought your approbation.
I repulsed him, mother. I told him, also, that
my decision so unhesitatingly pronounced, was irrevocable and
final; and then it was that he mentioned Mr. Lowe.”

“He says there are strange reports in circulation regarding
him, which, if true—”

“Ay, if true, mother! No doubt they have been fabricated
by Roland himself, or some of the vile creatures he
employs to subserve his base purposes!”

“Lucy, you speak with great zeal in behalf of this stranger.
Ha! ha!—what would be the effect on him, if he were a
listener!”

“He would hear a friend repelling the wicked aspersions
of his enemies.”

“But how do you know the reports are false?”

“I do not know it, mother—I merely believe him innocent,
until proofs are produced to prove the contrary.”

“That is right, Lucy. It seems to me that no stain of
guilt could be stamped upon a brow so fair—of one so ingenuous.
Yet I would not have my daughter's happiness depend
upon the guilt or innocence of a stranger.

“Do not fear it, mother. Depend upon it your daughter

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would be incapable of taking any irretrievable step without
your advice and concurrence.”

“Enough—enough!” cried Mrs. Winkle, embracing her
beautiful Lucy, and smiling through her tears.

“Ma, I hear aunt Wilsome descending the stairs. Let
her not find us discomposed.” Her mother responded by
hearty laughter.

“I shall go distracted!” said Miss Wilsome, the recent
inroads on her cheeks having been carefully repaired before
the mirror in her chamber. “What shall we do?”

“Play, of course,” said Mrs. Winkle. “I'll send for
Gusset, and we four will have a game.”

“Very good,” cried Wilsome, “we must not exact too
much of Mr. Lowe's time. He is a perfect gentleman,
sister.”

“I am very glad you think so, Wilsome,” was Mrs. Winkle's
reply, “because a great many people think differently.
They suspect him of being an impostor, and guilty of all manner
of crimes.”

“Sister,” said Wilsome, with great energy of voice, and
placing her hand on Mrs. Winkle's shoulder, “I am glad to
hear it.”

“Aunt Wilsome!” exclaimed Lucy.

“Nay, child—only glad to hear the silly gossips are circulating
such ridiculous lies. Do not, for the world, contradict
any of them. Let them talk—let them hate him. We
shall then have a monopoly of his society. We care not what
the vulgar herd of shopkeepers and milliners may say of us.
I will spend more of my time in your pleasant village than
formerly, since I am not to be comforted any more by Jocko.
My house will be desolate now, unless I can prevail on Mr.
Lowe to be a frequent visitor. But send for Gusset.”

Biddy was despatched on the errand, but soon returned
alone, and with looks of wonder.

“Why did she not come, Biddy?” asked Mrs. Winkle.

“She says why don't Miss Wilsome Winkle come to her
house?”

“What! What's that?” cried Miss Wilsome, her forehead
as red as her cheeks.

“She says why don't you visit her? and she has called on
you once, and it's now your turn to call on her.”

“The impudent hussy!” said Miss Wilsome, in great

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indignation. “Is the innocent, humble, obedient, grateful milliner
our family brought from the city, where she was destitute
of a second chemise for her back—”

“Pause there, sister,” said Mrs. Winkle, “and let us
ascertain if there be not some mistake in Biddy's version. If
it be true, madness is an epidemic—and she has caught it.
Lucy, it is not yet quite dark. Go and see Gusset. Tell her
what Biddy has said, and hear what she can allege in explanation.”

Lucy departed without delay, and returned while her aunt
yet shuffled the cards.

“You look wild, Lucy!” said her mother.

“Do I?” replied Lucy. “I hope I shall not be the next
victim. Gusset is truly in a strange way. She will not
come—”

“Then I'll go to her, and know the reason why she is
putting on these airs!” said Miss Wilsome, rising.

“No, aunt—she would only fret you. She does not desire
the company of any one to-night, if what she told me be
true.”

“What was that?” asked her aunt.

“That she is to be married to-morrow.”

“Married to-morrow!” said the old maid, lifting up her
hands.

“And she hopes we will attend her wedding at the church.
Mr. Amble, the minister, was present.”

“And did he hear what she said?” asked Mrs. Winkle.

“He did, and did not seem surprised.”

“Then it is true,” said Mrs. Winkle.

“True!” cried the old maid, her hands still aloft. “Who's
to be the bridegroom?”

“She did not say. I forgot to ask.”

“Attend the wedding! and in church! Mr. Amble will
get no fifty dollars from me to repair the parsonage—”

“But, aunt, you have already given him a check.”

“Have I? So I did. I shall tell the bank not to pay it.
Marry indeed! and to an ambling priest—”

“Bless your life, sister,” interposed Mrs. Winkle, “Mr.
Ambler is not to be the man. He is married already, and has
thirteen children.”

“I thought he was a widower. Thirteen! What a fool!
What is the world coming to? Who's that?”

-- 077 --

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This question was asked of Biddy, who peeped in timidly
from the hall.

“Dill Bizzle,” said she.

“Bill Dizzle!” said Lucy, smiling, “why won't you learn
to announce him correctly, Biddy?”

“Yes, man—and—and Sargent Blore.”

“I thought I heard his wooden leg,” said Mrs. Winkle.
“Tell them to come in, Biddy.”

Bill entered first, being pushed forward by the sergeant,
who seemed to approach with hesitation and embarrassment.
However, he ventured at length to stand forth, hat in hand,
and in his full military dress, some portions of which having
a slight resemblance to the uniform of the “old guard.” And
Bill, too, seemed to have been somewhat furbished for the
occasion. His shirt collar was tolerably white, and his face
seemed to have been washed since the adventure in the ditch.

“Dizzle, what is your will with us?” demanded Mrs.
Winkle.

“Nothing, mam,” said Bill. “I only came 'cause Sargent
Blore wanted me as one of his guards, as he never was
here by himself.”

“The brave sergeant surely is not afraid of the ladies?”
said Lucy.

“That's it!” replied Bill, with a quizzical smile, and casting
a side glance at Blore, whose solitary eye rolled and blinked
in evident trepidation.

“I am as bold as a lion to men, if you please, miss,” said
Blore; “but I own I am no match for the ladies. I can
fight, but I can't talk. I can lead a charge against an iron
battery, but I can't face a woman's tongue.”

“Were you ever married, sergeant?” asked Mrs. Winkle.

“Yes, madam. And that is the way I found out how
bitter a thing it is to be stormed by a woman's tongue.

“But all wives are not vixens. What became of yours?”

“I retreated—left her—and have never heard of her since.
The last time I saw her was when Blucher came up on our
right at Waterloo. But I am afraid she'll overtake me yet.
I'm sure she'll never die. She didn't mind the whistling of
bullets and bursting of bombs. She was as brave as Ney—
and could not be killed. I would just as soon meet the devil—
I beg pardon—may-be it's true that all women are not the
same.”

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“What does Mr. Winkle think of them?” asked Mrs.
Winkle.

“That's why I'm here. He thinks pretty much as I do—
but he hopes there's one good one in the world, and that he
may have her for his share.”

“His old cook and housekeeper,” said Dizzle, “are
snappers.”

“Snappers? what are they?” asked Lucy.

“Big-headed mud turtles that snap at every thing that
comes in their way, and they won't let go till it thunders.”

“Why does not my brother-in-law discharge those disagreeable
women?” asked Mrs. Winkle.

“It would do no good,” said Blore. “The new ones that
filled their places, as soon as they found out that he was terrified
at the sound of a scolding tongue, would begin to ding
at him, and keep on until they got him under their thumbs.”

“I always supposed it was his indulgent nature, and not
dread or fear, that caused him to tolerate those impudent servants,”
said Mrs. Winkle.

“You were wrong, then,” said Miss Wilsome. “This man
is right. I was the only one of the family that could silence
the maids. If you had endeavored to rule your husband by
a few good tongue lashings, you would have succeeded. But
you—”

“I never desired it!” said Mrs. Winkle.

“Your husband was a fortunate man. He used to say so.
And Napoleon will never marry unless he can have some
guarantee that his wife will not attempt to control his actions.
And no woman in her senses would have him unless she knew
she could change his abominable habits.”

“Beg pardon, madam,” said Blore, making a military salute,”
but the emperor wishes to contract with a wife for the
purpose of subjugating the housekeeper and cook, who are
always tyrannizing over him. And I am come here without
his knowledge, to ask some confidential questions about the
woman he intends to marry. I hope she's not one of the Tartars,
and that you all can tell me so.”

“Who do you mean!” asked the ladies, altogether.

“Miss Grisly Guzzle, or something of that sort.”

`Gusset—ma—Gusset! It is true! That is the solution
of her extraordinary conduct!” said Lucy. Miss Wilsome's
eyes dilated until her face was all eyes and mouth, the latter

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nearly as wide open as the former. Mrs. Winkle only leaned
back and shook her sides with excessive laughter.

“Yes, miss,” continued Blore, “and I do hope and pray
she won't turn out to be a savage like my wife, Mrs. Thomas,
did.” My name is Thomas Blore, but they called me at that
time only Mr. Thomas—the Thomases were Jews then, and
my lady thought she was getting a fortune. When we were
defeated at Waterloo, and Mrs. Thomas fell into the hands of
the victors, I dropt the Thomas with my leg and arm, and
took up my other name with my wooden limbs to keep from
being traced by my wife, if she escaped, which I felt pretty
certain she would do. There were a number of Thomases
killed, and I hoped she would count me as one of 'em. I've
never heard of her since, and pray heaven I may never meet
her hereafter.”

“The cars go at nine o'clock,” said Miss Wilsome, at
length finding utterance. “Sister—Lucy—let us pack up
and leave this abominable place! You shall live with me,
provided you pledge yourselves never to look at, speak to, or
have any sort of correspondence with my brother or any member
of his family. He is about to disgrace himself irretrievably.
And that wile wretch, Gusset—”

“Then we are all to be fried in purgatory!” said poor
Blore. “She's a wile wretch, is she? I'll live in my tent at
the new barracks we are to have at Boulogne, where the British
landed. But our chief will go mad, if his wife forms a
triple alliance with the cook and housekeeper.”

“There is no probability of that, sergeant,” said Mrs.
Winkle. “The mistress of the house, and particularly in
cases like this, when she is elevated to a position of more importance
than any to which she has been previously accustomed,
very naturally supposes it her duty to see that no
one shares her authority. Miss Gusset is a clear-headed
woman, and may, if I am not mistaken in her character, contribute
to my brother's happiness, and promote the economy
of his establishment. She has never been accustomed to the
luxuries of life, and therefore should not be extravagant.
Her walk has been an humble one, and hence she should be
meek and amiable.”

Blore began to dance, with delight, pointing out his wooden
leg, and whistling a martial tune, when he was cut short by
Miss Wilsome.

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“It will be just the reverse of what you suppose, sister,”
said she. “Your own invariable good nature leads you into
error. The hussy would never break out in your presence.
Before you, there was always the same mild, smiling, deferential
aspect. I have seen more of the world than you have,
and I tell you she will be the reverse of what you suppose.
She will subdue the servants, and you, too, Blore—and then
she will grind my brother's nose to the brain, until he surrenders
unconditionally. She will squander his money, set up a
fashionable equipage, frown with haughty contempt on her old
associates, and seek the company of none but her superiors,
who will drink her wines, and laugh at her folly behind her
back. No! Republican or not republican, it is a monstrous
absurdity to lift either men or women out of their proper
sphere.”

“Aunt,” said Lucy, “you agree with Mr. Lowe. He says
the man of a truly tall stature, never gazes upward for congenial
faces; but that the one who fancies himself to be above
all others, gives evidence that he has been accustomed only to
low companions.”

“Mr. Lowe will never marry a milliner. But enough.
I renounce my brother for ever. Let us depart. Bring my
bonnet.”

“The cars are gone,” said Bill Dizzle.

“Is there not an early boat?”

“Yes.”

“In it will I go, before these disgraceful nuptials are celebrated.
You will go with me, sister and niece?”

“Oh no!” said Mrs. Winkle. “We cannot abandon our
home because your brother chooses to marry little Gusset.”

“And do you intend to witness the ceremony?”

“Why not? If I could prevent the wedding I would do
so, most assuredly, because I think it ill-assorted and unnecessary.
But as no intervention of mine would be of any
avail, I don't see why we should be offended. Lucy and I
will go to the church, and I hope you will send home Walter
in time to accompany us—that is, if you are determined to
leave us.”

“Determined! Talk of the Medes and Persians! I
shall turn my back on the whole breed of you. Blore, I wish
I could drop a part of my name, as you did, and escape in the

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same manner. I am Miss Winkle, and Gusset is to be Mrs.
Winkle—the name of my high-bred mother!”

“Pardon, miss,” said Blore, “but you might remedy that.
You could marry, and I'm sure your new name wouldn't be a
low one—”

“What do you mean, sir? No puns! But I'm sure you
didn't mean it.”

“No, upon my honor—I meant nothing offensive. And
I'm truly sorry to hear you declare war against us all. If
you would only stay a month or so at the palace, and fight on
our side, no doubt we might humble this enemy—”

“No, sir. Before a week is over, the artful wretch will
lead my brother about by a ribbon as easily as I did my monkey
by his chain. She will make you all slaves! Go, and
prepare for the worst.”

Blore and Dizzle withdrew, the former in great despondency,
and both maintaining a strict silence, until they stood
at the gate which led into Lowe's kitchen.

It had been Blore's purpose, and the principal object of
his secret mission, in the event of hearing a favorable report
of the temper of his lord's spouse, to pay a visit to Lowe's
housekeeper, Mrs. Edwards, of whom he had conceived a good
opinion in consequence of their congeniality of tastes. He
had never seen her; but from the moment Dizzle divulged
her fondness for frogs, Blore had formed a favorable estimate
of her discernment.

“Come ahead,” said Dizzle, opening the gate.

“Perhaps I had better retreat,” said Blore, hesitating.
“Many a poor fellow under cover of the night, marches upon
a masked battery, and is blown to the devil. It is nobler and
braver, and safer too, to face the enemy in the broad daylight.
But do you think she'll be willing?”

“I don't know any thing about such things,” said Bill.
“When I told her you would be hunting after her, all I saw
was her face turn red as fire, and Mr. Lowe a laughing.” Bill
did not remember her words, or the broom handle she flourished—
for he thought only of the accommodating Patty.

“We'll scale the ramparts,” said Blore. “If she should
be a vixen, who knows but she may be a match for the chief's
mistress, and help to keep the garrison in order? Go in first,
Dizzle,” he continued, when they arrived in front of the kitchen
door, “and reconnoitre. You shall have that honor—an honor

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I never yielded to any man before. But bayonets and women's
tongues are very different things.”

“And so is frog spears,” said Bill, lifting the latch and
opening the door very cautiously. Seeing the coast clear they
both entered, and were made comfortable by the kindly greeting
of Patty O'Pan, and who assured the sergeant that Mrs.
Edwards was in a very agreeable humor that evening, and had
not scolded her since dinner.

The sergeant, then, that his operations might be commenced
in due form, sent Patty to her master with his compliments,
and asking the favor to be permitted to have a short conversation
with his honor, on a matter of importance. The request
was immediately granted; and when Blore entered
Lowe's library he beheld, for the first time, the object of his
solicitation, Mrs. Edwards herself, who was dusting the books
and adjusting the window curtains with an unsteady hand.
At the name of Blore, she recollected the intimation that had
been thrown out by Dizzle; and although there was a recurrence
of her resentful emotions, they seemed now to be developed
in a less violent form, and so she resolved to face the
sergeant's assault, if it should be his purpose to commence any
serious matrimonial approaches.

“Sit down, sir; I am glad to see you at my house, sergeant,”
said Lowe, after witnessing one of Blore's most ceremonious
bows.

“Thank you sir—but—”

Here he was interrupted in his speech by Mrs. Edwards,
who no sooner heard his voice, than she turned round upon
him, opened her mouth, and uttered screams in such quick
succession, and with such startling energy, that even her master
rose up in utter astonishment, and applied his hand to his
ears.

Blore sprang from his chair and attempted to make a precipitate
retreat, but he was met at the door by Dizzle and
Patty, and was prostrated by the collision. He now lay upon
his back, his wooden leg pointed upward in an attitude of
defence, or as a cheval de frise to repulse an apprehended attack.

“What does this mean?” demanded Lowe, when Mrs.
Edwards' screams died away, and she sank fainting on a
chair

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“The she-devil aint dead!” said Blore, rolling his eye
fearfully.

“She-devil! Who's a she-devil?” exclaimed Mrs. Edwards,
rising quickly, and approaching the prostrate soldier.

“Quarter!” cried he, “I surrender!”

“What does this mean?” again demanded Lowe.

“It means, sir, that that fragment of a 'uman being 'as
come to hour 'ouse a courting—and the widow Hedwards his
is wife!”

“It's true, your honor. When I was in the army I married
an English woman—”

“Henglish is as good as hother folks,” said Mrs. Edwards.

“At Waterloo,” continued Blore, “I thought all was lost,
and she among the rest—”

“You houtrageous—”

“To be certain of it,” continued Blore, “I had my own
name printed among the dead.”

“And that haccounts for your not being Thomas, now,”
said Mrs. Edwards.

“I see,” said Lowe; “and you have unexpectedly found
your wife. But, Edwards, why are you not the widow
Thomas?”

“Bless your soul, don't you know I married the drummer
Edwards in Lord Hilton's regiment, and that he was lost hoverboard
on hour way to Hamerica?”

“True. Enough of that. Then as your last marriage
was illegal, you remain of course the lawful wife of the sergeant.”

“Pardon, sir,” said the sergeant. “My name is Thomas
Blore, but as they called me Mr. Thomas, and she married me
as Mr. Thomas, and was always Mrs. Thomas herself—”

“You think,” said Lowe, smiling, “she has no right to be
Mrs. Blore?”

“That is the point, sir,” said the sergeant.

“It may be decided against you,” said Lowe, “if she
chooses to claim her own.”

“Ave you made hany thing for yourself?” demanded the
housekeeper, approaching the sergeant, who had lowered his
leg.

“I am second in command of the garrison, and have laid
up a thousand dollars. One half shall be yours if you will
say nothing—”

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“No—I'll 'ave it hall!” said she—“hall that a 'usband
howns belongs to the wife. But I won't live with you hif you
behave yourself, and hobey me. I don't want to leave my
young—”

“I will write the articles of settlement,” said Lowe,
quickly. “And, truly, sergeant, I think it would be unreasonable
in you, having yielded up two limbs and one eye to
glory, to claim your wife after so long a separation—”

“Claim the devil!” cried Blore, leaping up. “Pardon,
sir,—no offence to you. But I wouldn't be guilty of so unreasonable
a thing. I will sign, sir. Sign any thing to be rid
of her. Come, Dizzle. Confound these night sallies! Fix
it, Mr. Lowe. I'll sign. Only let me get once more under
cover of the fort!”

Thus terminated the sergeant's long meditated sortie upon
a matrimonial expedition.

“Hif you pleases, sir,” said Mrs. Edwards, when the
others had departed, “I ham disposed to be hagreeable. Put
down the five 'undred.”

“I doubt the justice of it, Edwards. Besides you do not
need his money. I will provide for you. You have served
me faithfully, and I shall have it in my power to reward you.
See Dizzle, and Patty, and cause them to be silent on the subject
of this discovery.”

“I will do hexactly has your honor hadvises,” said the
old housekeeper, as she hastened away to the kitchen.

CHAPTER IX. WILSOME RETURNS TO TOWN, AND GIVES THE POET A CHECK—MR. SNOBSON.

Miss Wilsome, true to her inflexible purpose, left Babbleton
the next morning by the early boat, and was put down at her
mansion at precisely half-past ten o'clock A. M., the hour appointed
for the wedding. She had Davy Dibble, the son of
the widow's gardener, along with her, carrying the tom cat.
Snapper, her coachman, opened the door.

“He's buried, mam,” said he, naturally supposing the

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death of the monkey had caused the precipitate return of his
mistress. “The weather was so hot he wouldn't keep. But
they had a nice funeral, and Mr. Parke spoke a yology on his
life and character in Latin.”

“Mr. Parke? Who is he?” asked his mistress.

“One of Mister Walter's college friends. And the other
gentleman has wrote a hepertaff for his headstone—all in
Greek.”

“What other gentleman?”

“Mr. Pollen, mam, the poet.”

“I know him. When was he here?”

“They've been here all the time, mam, a keeping Mr.
Walter company.”

“Faugh! I thought I smelt tobacco. No doubt they've
turned the house upside down. Take the poor fellow into the
kitchen and feed him, Davy. Here comes Griddle. Griddle,
why are you frowning in that way?”

“You must get another cook, mam, by the end of the
month. I give you warning.”

“What's the matter? I left you with nothing to do
scarcely—”

“Nothing to do, scarcely! To cook five times a day—or
two of 'em in the night, and sometimes one of 'em after midnight—
called nothing to do! And three hungry wolves always
at the table! And one of 'em a Southern slave owner,
and always calling colored people niggers—talking about this
and that nigger before my face!”

“You don't say these men have been feasting here all the
time with Walter, do you?”

“I do, mam; and it's cost you a great deal, I know.”

“I don't care what it cost; and that is no business of
yours. But if they have spoilt my curtains and furniture
with their horrid tobacco,” continued Miss Wilsome, pursuing
her way to the dining room, “I'll punish them well for it.
Come here, Rose. What have you to say against Walter and
his associates?”

“Me? Nothing, miss.”

“Well—there's one satisfied. Why do you stand staring
there, Snapper? Are the horses cured of their rascally
capers, yet?”

“Yes, mam, Mr. Walter soon had 'em as gentle as sheep.

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But, mam, it's my unpleasant duty to 'nounce to you that one
of 'em took sick and deceased yesterday.”

“Which one?”

“Punch, mam.”

“Why he was the tricksy one! I am only sorry he didn't
break his neck a month ago. Look for another. Pah! I
smell the tobacco, here, too.”

“It's all over the house, mam—” began the cook.

“Rose, was it not your duty to take care of the house?”
demanded Miss Wilsome.

“Iss, mam—but Mr. Walter was to give me my orders—
and he ordered me to bring a box of cigars. I told him you
didn't allow smoking, only out in the portico.”

“And what did he say to that?”

“He said you were the mistress of the house when present,
and should be obeyed. But as he was then master, he must
be obeyed.”

“Ha! ha! Good for Walter.”

“He had been drinking champagne, mam,” said the cook,
“which he ordered me to bring up.”

“Well?”

“They've drunk a whole dozen, mam.”

“Well, what's that to you? Mind your business. Oh, I
forgot you intend to leave my service. Go about your business.
You know my rule. I never attempt to dissuade any
one—”

“If you will let me take back the warning, mam—”

“Well—as you please. But you are not to criticise the
language of any guests in my house. If you can read, look at
your geography, and you will find that colored people are Negroes,
and red people Indians.”

The old cook, who had been mortally offended at the roistering
young gentlemen, went away grumbling, and was
laughed at heartily by Snapper, who enjoyed their company
as a relief from the usual dull monotony of his life.

“Where is Walter, now?” asked Miss Wilsome, turning
suddenly to Rose.

“They're up stairs, yet, mam.”

“What! has Walter's guests been sleeping here, too?”

“Iss, mam.”

“And not up yet?”

“No, mam.”

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“And did they have any tobacco up stairs?”

“I—Iss, mam.”

“The villains! But where did they sleep?”

“In the chamber fixed for Mister Walter, and—and—”

“Where else? That wouldn't hold them all.”

“In your chamber, too, mam, on the second floor.”

“What!” screamed Miss Wilsome, so fiercely that poor
Rose sprang back as if she had been stabbed.

“Mister Walter ordered me, mam.”

“I know who to blame. And if he had ordered you—”

“Iss, mam.”

“Stupid! I—I'll pull his ears! My sheets, my pillow
slips—”

“Iss, mam.”

“Be silent. No doubt they have ransacked the closets,
and turned every thing topsy-turvey! I'll pull every hair out
of their heads! I'll—Rose go and tell them I have returned,
and desire to see them immediately. What's this? Stop,
Rose.”

“It's a pack of cards, mam.”

“Did they play whist?”

“Iss, mam.”

“There are three of them, and we might have a pleasant
game together. Tell them to come down. Don't hurry them,
by saying I'm angry. Here, take this letter to Walter. If
he goes to his mother and uncle, I shall be done with him!”
said the old maid, with a terrible frown.

“Good morning, Wilsome. Want a game of whist?”
said a voice in the portico, after Rose had gone.

“Pretty Polly!” cried the old lady.

“Wilsome! poor Jocko's dead.”

“Alas, poor Jocko!”

“Walter killed Jocko.”

“What's that?” cried Miss Wilsome.

“It's true, missus—every word of it,” said Griddle, who
had been listening, and coming forward now with signs of triumph
on her sooty features.

“It aint true, missus, not a word of it!” said Snapper,
who had been watching Griddle, and followed her into the
presence of their mistress.

“I'll take my bible oath,” continued Griddle, “that I saw
the young sparks hang your Jocko!”

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“I'll tell you, mam,” said Snapper, “edzactly how it was.”
This he did with candor and circumstantiality.

“That's only what the rampaging bloods told him, mam.
I saw myself what I told you, mam.”

“Griddle!” said Wilsome, with one of her most ferocious
looks, “get ready the young gentlemen's breakfasts—and if I
hear another word from you, unless it be something in relation
to your own department of business, you shall pack up your
things and be off before another sun goes down. I don't want
to hear any thing from you, either, Snapper.”

Snapper followed the cook, but with a triumphant smile
on his lip.

“Have they come down?” asked Wilsome, when Rose
reappeared.

“Iss, mam—they're in the parlor.”

“Tell Walter to come here.”

“Iss, mam.” Rose returned to the parlor, and Walter
soon appeared before his aunt.

“I hope you have enjoyed yourself, Walter,” said his
aunt, fixing her great eyes upon him.

“Never better in my life, aunt! The only drawback to
my happiness was the lamentable end of poor Jocko.”

“And the dread of my vengeance. Tell me truly—did
he hang himself?”

“No, aunt. Neither was he wantonly killed.” Walter
then related the manner of his death, and he was surprised to
see his aunt bear the recital with so much resignation. Of
course he was not aware that his friend Lowe had casually
expressed his detestation of monkeys in his aunt's hearing,
and that his aunt had conceived a partiality for his friend.

“That will do. I know the rest. Your companions were
respectable, and I commend you for every thing but the tobacco,
and the taking possession of my chamber—”

“All the rest were locked, aunt!”

“Bah! Couldn't you break the locks? I locked them to
keep the servants out—not the gentlemen. I say I commend
your choice of companions—one a student, and the other a
poet.”

“Poor Pollen, however, when I picked him up, made rather
a shabby appearance.” Walter described the incident at
the pawnbroker's.

“What, without a shirt? Ha, ha, ha! Did yours fit

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him? I hope he used the bath. Let me see the poem. Biddy
bring my portfolio.”

“Aunt!” said Walter, seeing the old lady take up a pen,
“surely you would not venture to make any alterations—”

“Nonsense, child! Here, give him this. I'll keep the
poem. Go, now, and conduct hither your guests. The breakfast
is smoking on the table. Say nothing about the wedding,
and the disgrace your uncle has brought upon the family, until
the young gentlemen have departed. And they need not be
in haste if they have any inclination to play. But when they
take their leave, you may take yours, and for ever, Walter,
unless you agree to cut your uncle's acquaintance.”

“My dear aunt, Pollen and Parke have already agreed to
go with me to Babbleton this afternoon, and to accompany me
to my uncle's chateau. We have been concocting an enormous
budget of amusement—”

“If it is for the purpose of annoying Gusset, I shall approve
of it. But when your invention is exhausted, remember
you are to return to me, and you may bring Mr. Lowe with
you. But if you do not cut your uncle, you need not return.
Still you must write me an account of your deviltries practised
on the milliner. Get Pollen to do it, for I intend to
read it for the diversion of my friends.”

Walter rejoined his friends in the parlor, and conducted
them to the breakfast table, where his aunt presided with
gayety and good humor, to their great delight. After the repast,
they departed to make preparations for the celebration of
the emperor's nuptials.

It was not until they were traversing one of the streets
where fire-works were kept for sale, that Walter looked at the
paper his aunt had charged him to deliver to Pollen. It was
a check for fifty dollars; and it threw the poor poet into a
paroxysm of exultation. He would have spent half of it immediately,
under the supposition that more could at any time
be as easily acquired, had he not been prevented by Walter,
who insisted upon his privilege of defraying all the expenses
of the meditated celebration.

Soon after that point was determined, the poet fell into one
of his fits of abstraction, and began unconsciously to utter
words relating to a subject foreign to the matter under consideration.
He was dictating proposals for the issue of a new
periodical, of which he was to be both the proprietor and

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editor. And he alleged in his soliloquy, that inasmuch as the
critics, who had never ceased to do him gross injustice, were
actuated by unworthy motives, being authors themselves, it
would be his privilege and pleasure to retaliate upon them by
an exposure of their ignorance and malevolent motives. At
the same time it would be his delight and duty to contribute
to the development of true genius wherever he might discover
it, instead of repulsing meritorious young aspirants by gratuitous
sneers or disheartening them by cruel neglect. In a word,
the injustice he had suffered, would teach him to be just.

“Let him go,” said young Parke, when he saw the poet,
unmindful of his company, turn into an alley, principally occupied
by printers, and proceed on his way muttering to himself,
and gesticulating energetically.

“Yes—let him go,” said Walter, looking after him. “He
would not enjoy the sport. But who is that over there bowing
to you?”

“It's Snobson. Don't you know him? he's coming towards
us. He staid only two years at college, and left without
graduating. And yet his father is a rich banker. Shall I
introduce him?”

“Yes. Perhaps he'll go up with us. Is there any fun in
him?”

“Full to the brim—and as simple as a loon. He runs
after every girl that strikes his fancy, and thinks himself such
an irresistible Adonis, that no one is capable of withstanding
him.”

At that moment Snobson came up and was introduced to
Walter, who was amused at the scarcely perceptible mustaches
which were industriously stroked by Snobson, his ponderous
chain, his enormous ring, and his polished tight-fitting shoes.
He saw, likewise, at a single glance, that the face of his new
acquaintance was marred by incurable pimples, and that his
hair was fiery red.

“Snobson,” said Parke, “how would you like to go with
us to a wedding feast in the country?”

“How far off?”

“Near Babbleton.”

“Babbleton! Good! I'm in. I go there every day.
I've made a great discovery up there. The most beautiful
creature in the world lives in Babbleton. I haven't found out
her name yet; I followed her into a certain street, but don't

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yet know the house in which she lives. I saw her on the boat
one day, and since then I have never missed a trip. I've
made a bet that she shall be my captive in a month.'

“What is she like?” asked Walter.

He described her. She was evidently Walter's own sister
Lucy! But he manifested no surprise, promising himself
some amusement at their meeting.

CHAPTER X. A GRAND PARTY AT MR. WINKLE'S CHATEAU.

During the passage to Babbleton, Mr. Tom Snobson entertained
Winkle and Parke with narrations of his innumerable
adventures with the belles at the different watering-places, all
of which he had visited within the last six weeks. His career
had been an unbroken triumph. He had been cordially welcomed
by the keepers of the hotels, and had received only
smiles from the ladies. His father was excessively rich, and
every body knew it. But of all the young ladies it had ever
been his good fortune to admire, the unknown beauty whom
he had traced to Babbleton seemed to have made the deepest
impression on his susceptible heart. He declared upon his
honor, that he dreamt of her incessantly, and really felt that
he might be capable of loving her dearly, and only her—provided
she came of a good family. He did not deem it necessary
to reflect that his own father had served an apprenticeship
in a counting-room, since he was now a universally acknowledged
aristocrat.

George Parke's curiosity became excited to behold the paragon
of Babbleton, whose charms Snobson delighted so much
to portray; and Walter, assuming a dubious gravity, as if
not quite sure he had ever seen the unparalleled creature, and
knowing perfectly well that Parke had never met with Lucy,
meditated only the means of realizing the greatest possible
amount of sport from the discovery. He assured them, therefore,
that if it had not been his good fortune hitherto, to know
so lovely an inhabitant of the village, there would be no

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[figure description] Page 092.[end figure description]

difficulty in procuring an introduction, and then his friends, and
especially the enamored Snobson, should enjoy the delight of
an immediate presentation.

Arrived at the village inn, Walter contrived under some
pretence or other to separate himself for a short time from
his companions, and hastened to his mother's house to learn
the exact condition of affairs. From the manner in which his
aunt had spoken in condemnation of the alliance, it might be
a matter of doubt whether his mother and sister, or either of
them, had accompanied the bride to his uncle's mansion after
the celebration of the nuptials at the altar. Lucy's letter
had informed him of her intention to witness the ceremony;
but nothing further in regard to her subsequent purposes.

Walter's mother, however, related every thing that had
transpired. The church had been thronged by spectators,
whom Gusset had invited thither to witness her triumph.
And it appeared that such a consummation of her ambitious
projects had not been unforeseen; for she was decked in the
usual habiliments of matrimony, and seemed to attract the admiration
of many of her neighbors, who had not been accustomed
to regard the retired milliner as worthy of any special
attention. But Mrs. Winkle declared that the bride appreciated
the importance of her position. She was not embarrassed.
There were no symptoms of delicate timidity in her
carriage or speech. On the contrary, the expressions of her
countenance were rather indicative of imperious feeling, and
a proud consciousness of the elevated station she was henceforth
to assume, as the spouse of the wealthiest man in the
country. On the other hand, her lord manifested indications
of awe and terror in the novelty of his situation. As if he
had utterly surrendered his independence in becoming a wedded
man, he yielded an unhesitating obedience to whatever
was signified as her will. He seemed, indeed, to have no will
of his own, but to obey. And she, that her sway might not
be diminished for the want of exercise, taxed her ingenuity
to devise demands, that her power might be exhibited to the
public.

Although the groom, attended by his neighbors, had
arrived on horseback, the bride was not satisfied to accompany
her lord to his home in the same unostentatious manner.
The old heavy coach had to be sent for. It was drawn
by four horses, and driven by a servant in livery. She

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mounted the steps with the air of a princess, amidst the gazes of
admiring friends, and the envy of many ancient maidens who
witnessed with dismay her sudden exaltation. The equipage
halted at the widow's door, and Lucy was required to occupy
a seat beside her “new-made aunt,” as the lady herself
expressed it within the hearing of the widow. That was the
substance of the information Walter obtained from his mother.
But he learned a very large party would be assembled at
the chateau that evening, and thither he lost no time in
conducting his companions.

They proceeded on foot, as the distance was not great, and
arrived in front of the mansion just after the hall had been
illuminated.

“Now, boys,” said Walter, “from what I could learn in
the village, the beauty we are in quest of must be among
my uncle's—no, my aunt's—guests. But since it seems
probable that I would have known the lady, and doubtless
have been captivated by her irresistible charms, if there
were not some impediment in the way, I think we should
proceed with circumspection, until certain suspicions which
have arisen in my mind are dispelled. She may be, possibly,
the daughter of an honest shoemaker—”

“No!” cried Snobson, “that would be a d—l of a
joke! and I almost in love with her!”

“Or,” continued Walter, “some milliner's apprentice;
and, as my `new-made aunt,' was once a milliner herself—”

“That is the reason she was invited,” said Parke. “But
if she is as beautiful as Tom says, I want a chat with her, no
matter who she is.”

“Of course,” responded Walter. “But then, let me urge
you not to cast too many curious looks at her if she chances
to appear before us unexpectedly, and should equal or surpass
Tom's description. And above all, do not for the world ask
any one who she is, or what is her name. It might cause you
to be sneered at by some of the ton. Leave every thing to
me. I will find a proper time and opportunity to introduce
you.”

They entered the hall just when the last word was uttered;
and Walter, under the pretext of seeking information where
his uncle and aunt were to be found, left his companions for
a few moments to themselves, promising to return immediately

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[figure description] Page 094.[end figure description]

and conduct them into the presence of the lord and lady of
the palace.

When Walter passed out of the great hall, the first person
he met was Lucy, who, in high spirits threw her arms round
his neck before he had recognized her.

“O ho,” cried he, “suppose it had been Snobson or
Parke.”

“Who are they?” demanded Lucy.

Walter told her, and she instantly promised to co-operate
with him in his innocent project for their mutual diversion.
It was arranged that they should all sit on the same side of
the table at dinner, so that Lucy's identification by Snobson
might be delayed. She might, in the meantime, however,
for the especial gratification of her own curiosity, and for the
purpose of knowing the gentleman, once flit across their vision
as they stood in the hall, and while Walter sought his uncle
and aunt in the next room, and obtained permission to present
his friends.

This was speedily accomplished; and when Walter re-entered
the hall to conduct the young gentlemen into the
presence of the married couple, he found them transported
with the lingering effects of the bright vision which had been
vouchsafed them. “Was she the beauty you saw on the boat
and followed into — street?” asked Walter.

“Yes,” cried Snobson, “only more angelic than ever. I
hope she is no mechanic's daughter, no milliner's apprentice.
I care not how poor she may be—my father is rich enough—
I will marry her. George, recollect, I am in love, honorably
in love! And you, Winkle, I warn you to keep your eyes off—
she was discovered by me, and should be mine.”

“Warning me against gazing at one whom I don't know!
You need not fear. All I apprehend is that she will turn out
one of the nobodies you despise so much. But, come; it is
the hour for dinner, and you must be presented.”

Walter led them into the presence of the host and hostess,
where they were very cordially received.

“Taken at last, uncle? I hope you will be happy in your
captivity,” said Walter.

“Not taken, sir—no capitulation, sir—but a convention—
an alliance—with secret stipulations. In the domestic department
my ally will rule, whilst I direct the military and
diplomatic affairs.”

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[figure description] Page 095.[end figure description]

“I forget, Mr. Winkle,” said his imperious spouse—for
she seemed to become more haughty at every new development
of her newly acquired power and importance—“whether or
not the secret stipulations were to be divulged by either of us.”

“Oh, I beg pardon, my dear Gusset.”

“Recollect!” cried she, in his ear, “you were never to mention
that name again.”

“True—true. You must not hesitate to remind me of
any neglect of duties, Mrs. Winkle, or infraction of the treaty.
But as for secret stipulations—”

Here dinner was announced, and the emperor's speech
was cut short. He conducted his spouse in advance of the
company, and a chair was reserved near them at the table for
Lucy, who, in pursuance of the plan agreed upon, remained
in concealment until all the guests were seated.

But that his companions might not be idle, Walter introduced
them to a great many of his acquaintances, and among
the rest, to the sisters Bell and Blanche Arum, rich and
fashionable daughters of a retired patent pill manufacturer,
which was quite a different personage from the manufacturer
of shoes; to the sisters Susan and Sally Crudle, whose father
was still more wealthy than the haughty Arum; but then he
made his fortune by the manufacture of beer. Arum had long
since sunk the shop, while Crudle could not be prevailed on
to relinquish his business. Therefore his name was still over
the door of the shop in the city; and while it remained there,
Mrs. C. opposed every attempt of her daughters to prevail on
their coachman to wear a broad band on his hat and extra
bright buttons on his coat. Crudle listened very patiently to
every argument advanced, both by his wife and daughters, in
favor of an entire relinquishment of business: the demonstrations
of a sufficiency of wealth to produce an ample income
at simple interest; the delights of leisure: the advantages of
dignified retirement, and the better opportunity of effecting
advantageous alliances, etc. To all such protestations and
pleadings, Mr. Crudle would reply, by casting a check for
$1000 into the midst of his family, for the purchase of new
articles of furniture, jewels, etc, and alleging that quadruple
that amount had been realized from his business since the last
discussion of the subject, and that if he had taken their advice,
he would have been a poorer man by so many thousands.

Lucy had glided into the saloon, and quietly taken

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possession of the chair which had been reserved for her; the clatter
of knives and forks having overwhelmed all other sounds.
The young gentlemen had sipped their wine with the bride,
with their eyes glancing from the Arums to the Crudles, who
sent back flashes of equal intensity; and all the time Lucy
sat demurely at the side of her protuberant uncle, slyly exchanging
signals with her brother, who was nearly opposite his
companions, and occasionally obtaining a stealthy view of Snobson
and Parke who were incessantly addressed by the Crudles
and Arums across the table.

Nor was it long before the enterprising daughters of the
rich men learned that Tom Snobson was the son of the great
banker Snobson, whose position in society was fixed, and whose
name had been in the newspapers. Nor was it less interesting
to ascertain—which they did—that young Parke was a student
at Princeton College, destined to the legal profession,
and a scion of one of the great southern families, who possessed
their hundreds of slaves. True, slavery in the abstract
was condemned—but in the hymenial concrete, it might not be
an irreconcilable evil. Hence, a battery was unmasked against
both young gentlemen, from the flashing eyes of the daughters
of the pill and beer nabobs.

Far away at the opposite end of the table sat Ralph Roland,
never gazing towards Lucy but between his fingers, and
unperceived by her. Edmund Lowe, pale, thoughtful and
abstemious, was not so far removed, nor so careful in concealing
the direction of his eyes, which wandered over the whole
assembly, and dwelt the longest upon the fair brow and perfect
form of Lucy. He sat beside old John Dowly—the
melancholy discarded lover of Lucy's mother.

After the last course had disappeared, Roland arose with
a foaming goblet and proposed the health of the bride, which
was loudly cheered and heartily responded to by all but Lucy,
who was glancing slyly at Walter's excited friends, whose heads
were dodging under the artillery of Blanche and Bell, and
Susan and Sally.

“Be attentive, Lucy!” said her aunt. “Did you not hear
what Mr. Roland said?”

“I beg pardon, Gusset,” replied Lucy, quickly, resuming
her former attitude, but not before Snobson had perceived
her.

“Miss Winkle!” said Griselda, “I beg that you will

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hereafter forget that I was ever called Gusset. That name
has been extinguished, and I shall expect none but my enemies
to make use of it hereafter.”

“She is now my spouse, and your aunt, Lucy,” said Mr.
Winkle.

“I forgot, uncle.”

“I know it. Of course you could never be the enemy of
my wife—although she says some of my family will never treat
her with respect.”

Lucy was silent, while her aunt looked steadily at her.

Then Colonel Oakdale proposed three cheers for Napoleon
Winkle; and amidst the rapturous applause—for the colonel,
being a widower himself, and the junior of the bridegroom,
had intimated his purpose of following Napoleon's example—
there was heard a startling crash about midway down the table,
which was followed by slight shrieks from the Arums and
Crudles. It had been occasioned by the fall of Snobson, who,
in leaning back to obtain another view of the glorious eyes
of Lucy that had been momentarily fixed upon him, lost his
equilibrium, and fell over on his back.

This incident was followed by uncontrollable laughter, on
the part of Walter, who understood the cause of it, and which
was signalled by him to Lucy, whose ill suppressed convulsions
gave her aunt serious vexation, and subjected herself to
several terse lectures upon the subject of propriety.

The scene had not escaped the notice of Roland, whose
brows were contracted fiercely, as he endeavored in vain to
catch the eye of the offending young gentleman. The glance
he launched at Lucy, was repulsed with something like disdain,
certainly with indifference.

Without form or ceremony,—for Napoleon had most unaccountably
abandoned the helm of command, and his spouse
had never before mingled with, much less been a principal
actor in so large an assembly of gay people, the company arose
and proceeded to the parlors in promiscuous groups, with no
regard to precedence, and much to the chagrin of the Arums,
who vented their spleen openly. But it afforded delight to
the Crudles, who appreciated the utmost freedom of social
enjoyment.

Walter lingered in the hall to intercept his companions,
where, upon meeting him, they contrived to escape from their
belles.

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“It was her eyes!” said Snobson, trembling with real
perturbation. “They drew me over. The chair-back was
broken off, and that made the crash. It was magnetism. She
attracted me. You could see her, Winkle, from where you
sat. Who is she?”

“There were several of the milliner's old acquaintances
in that neighborhood. Don't be a fool, and fall in love with
a girl beneath you. You shall be introduced to the one you
admire so much. But be calm. Cool yourself in the air.
She'll turn out a nobody I'm afraid.”

“If she is the one I saw flit across the hall,” said Parke,
“you may rely upon it Tom has reason for his madness. Milliner's
apprentice or not, she has the most fascinating features
and carriage of any girl in the company, if not in the universe.”

“You, too! I'm sorry I brought you here. Your parents
will never forgive me. In love with some poor obscure village
girl, whose fingers may be pricked into nutmeg graters by the
point of her needle! You had the aristocracy by you. The
Arums and the Crudles.”

“We learned they were rich in a few minutes,” said Parke;
“for they spoke unconsciously of their fathers' houses and lots,
horses and carriages, and their fine dresses and jewelry—and
the sums that had been paid for them. We learned every
thing but the manner in which their fortunes had been made.”

“And they were au fait as to the standing and means
of my family—and of yours, Winkle,” he added, rather
gravely.

“But not of mine,” said Parke. “They could not find
out how many acres and woolly heads I had. Yet they seemed
disposed to take me on trust. And perhaps one of them, the
younger Crudle—Sally, I believe—may have a chance for me.
My income they tell me is to be small, whenever the cotton
crop fails. A mile square in Georgia, don't produce as much
revenue as a lot in the city of twenty-five feet front. I shall
not lose sight of the Crudles, for they are capable of refinement,
and our people in the South won't be too inquisitive if
I bring home an heiress.”

When the young gentlemen entered the parlors, the first
object that attracted the attention of Snobson, was Lucy.
She sat in an alcove of a window, conversing with Lowe. Old
Mr. Dowly was seated apart, with his large lustrous eyes

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fixed upon the interesting pair. Roland was talking to Miss
Bell Arum, while Blanche was looking over the music at the
piano. The Crudles, contriving to be disengaged, seemed to
be awaiting the approach of our party of young gallants. At
the extreme end of the long apartment, on a luxuriously cushioned
sofa, were seated Mr. and Mrs. Winkle, receiving the
felicitations of their acquaintance.

“There she is!” whispered Snobson. “Is she not an
angel?”

“She surpasses all the beauties I ever beheld,” said Parke.

“Oh, that lady in the recess, conversing with Mr. Lowe?”
responded Walter.

“Yes!” said Parke, with animation. “But if the fellow's
name be Lowe, he does not seem to be a low fellow. I
noticed him at the table, and I think I never beheld a gentleman
of better polish or more refined manners. He has a fine
countenance, and the young lady must be of high breeding.
Walter, none of your humbug! I suspect she is one of your
favorites. You seem to have them every where. I shall know
what to say to Miss Virginia, when I return to the city.”

“You are mistaken, George; upon my honor you are, if
you suppose I have matrimonial designs upon that creature.
I know her well. You shall be introduced. Come along.”

“But who is she? her name?” demanded the young men.

“Oh, Miss what-do-you-call-her! Come!” he continued,
leading them towards the alcove, seeing Lowe withdraw with
a smile on his beautiful pale lip, and convinced that Lucy had
revealed to him the mischievous plot.

“But if she should not be a proper acquaintance for me to
make in such a public place?” said Snobson, hesitatingly.

“Oh, come along. She is quite genteel enough. Sister
Lucy,” he continued, with gravity, “let me introduce my
friends, Mr. Snobson, of Philadelphia, and Mr. Parke, of
Georgia.”

Lucy bowed very kindly, while the young gentlemen
blundered in their salutations, and knew not what to say.
They looked at each other, at Walter, at Miss Winkle,
blushed and trembled. They might have felt and acted
differently, if it had occurred to them that Walter had deliberately
meditated so embarrassing a surprise for them.

“I think I have enjoyed the pleasure of seeing Mr. Snobson
before,” said Lucy; “and I do not remember where

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And yet I am sure it has not been very long since. Oh! did
I not see you on the boat the other day?”

Snobson was under the necessity of confessing that he
was on the boat the day alluded to, for had he not told Walter
that he followed the charming creature through several
streets? But the poor fellow was so nearly stricken dumb
that he could only utter monosyllables.

“And I have often heard my brother speak with enthusiasm
of his friend from Georgia. Perhaps Mr. Parke may
have detected Walter in some insidious praise of his poor
sister?”

“No—hang me if ever he did!” said Walter.

“True,” said Parke, recovering his accustomed composure,
“but I wonder he did not. I am sure I would have
lauded one of mine to him if he had dwelt so near her, provided
she had been so—I mean fair, and accomplished.”

“That would have been a different matter altogether,”
said Walter. “And no doubt I should have mentioned
Lucy, if—don't frown, sister!”

“Go, sir. I dismiss you,” said Lucy, affecting a look of
displeasure.

“I will, good sister,” said Walter; “for I see Sergeant
Blore beckoning me through the window. But, Lucy, where
are the guards? I see no bayonets.”

“Our aunt has ordered them not to appear to-night.”

“She is to be general, then? We'll see. Don't be alarmed
at any thing you hear to-night, Lucy.” Saying this, Walter
withdrew. He was followed by Snobson, and overtaken on
the terrace.

“Mr. Winkle,” said Snobson, “I want to make you an
humble apology; and I hope you won't be offended afterwards.
I do beg your pardon. I didn't know it was your
sister I was talking about, and was following in the street.
I am willing to make any reparation in my power—”

“Reparation?”

“Upon my honor I will! I am sure, if father could once
see her—”

“You would marry her, if he gave his consent?”

“Upon my word and honor I would! And you may say
so to her, if you choose—”

“Oh, my dear fellow, you must say such things to her
yourself. And as for apologizing for what you did the other

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day, I beg you won't think of it. It is gratifying to any girl
to be admired and followed. You have no idea what fine
spirits my sister enjoyed when she observed it.”

“Did she see me?”

“Yes—and she boasted of it. The girls are as fond of
making conquests as ever Alexander was.”

“And she knew it! I feel like a detected sheep-killing
dog! What shall I do?”

“Why, tell her she carried your heart by storm; that
the attraction was too powerful to be resisted; and hence you
could not avoid following her. She will be flattered, I assure
you.”

“I shall never have the boldness to speak to her in that
way. But you will not be offended, I hope?”

“Nonsense, Tom. I would do the same if I were like
you, no doubt. But excuse me, now; I have an appointment
out here under the chestnut tree.”

Snobson returned to the gay company within, while Walter
joined the sergeant, with whom he found Bill Dizzle, and both
were anxiously awaiting him.

The new mistress of the establishment had truly exerted
her power over her lord, and obtained an order that there
should be no military display in the vicinity of the mansion.
But the retainers of the house had permission to get drunk
at the barracks, called the camp of Bologne, near the scene
of the late invasion of John Bull, and to send up a few noiseless
rockets in honor of the merry occasion. The subject of
the conference under the chestnut tree on the lawn, may be
developed in the progress of this history. Suffice it to say,
that the sergeant was much chagrined at the conduct of his
general's spouse; and was conscious of well founded apprehensions,
that she was not only capable of subduing all the
other females about the house, but would not be likely to
pause in the career of ambition, until she had obtained the
supreme command of the entire establishment. At all events
he was quite as impatient as Walter could be, to ascertain by
some well-conceived experiments the extent of her influence
over her lord.

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p459-119 CHAPTER XI THE BRIDAL NIGHT CONTINUED, AND WHAT TOOK PLACE ON THE TOP OF THE HOUSE.

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As there are more vicissitudes in American society than in
any other under the sun, it follows that our people are the
most observant and calculating of the dwellers upon this mundane
sphere. Therefore, as soon as the revellers were re-assembled
in the commodious parlors of the Winkle mansion,
and those who fancied that sort of exercise, were tripping on
the “light fantastic toe,” the other portion of the assembly,
that preferred the exercise of the tongue, were every where
discussing the consequences of the wedding.

“I am sorry for the widow, and it's a pity for Walter and
Lucy,” said Mrs. Arum, as she admired a heavy jewel, resembling
a fantastic breastplate, on the bosom of her daughter
Bell.

“It's tremendous lamentable,” responded Mrs. Crudle,
smiling at her daughter Susan, then whirling in the dance with
Mr. Roland, “to think that they held their heads so high!
Now, Mr. Roland says, they are beggars!”

“Beggars, Mrs. Crudle! surely they'll not be so bad off
as that?”

“That's what he said—but I wouldn't have it mentioned
for the world as coming through me. He says Miss Wilsome
went off in a huff to the city, swearing vengeance against all
the family that countenanced the hypocritical Gusset, and declaring
she would have nothing further to do with any of 'em
who went to the wedding, or attended the revels out here to-night.”

“And Wilsome is wilful enough to keep her word. Lucy
and Walter were looked upon as her heirs.”

“She'll marry now, if it's to a butcher; that is, if he can
learn to play whist. It's in the breed. You see what her
hallucinated brother has done. I'm sure a fair-faced wellformed
butcher is as good as the scrawny sallow-complexioned
milliner.”

“You are right, Mrs. Crudle. And as we were just

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saying, our haughty neighbors, the Winkles of Babbleton, must
lower their feathers at least, for the humble demure Gusset
that was, and that used to knuckle to and almost worship
them, as sure as she lives, will be revenged. She will tower
above them now. I know the nature of these soft-spoken
meek old maids when they get the upper hand! They'll
quarrel the first week. I know it. And the proud widow
would die rather than demean herself before her old dependant.”

“Yes, indeed, Mrs. Arum! And she will be willing to
associate oftener with other people who are worth a thousand
times as much as herself—and in place of smiling risively
when pertinent people must be telling how our husbands made
their fortunes, she'll be sending the silly Biddy to us for the
loan of a gill of cream, or a basket of coals. Oh, we'll mortify'
em! Let's make our coachmen drive by her house six
times every fine day; and tell the girls to promenade before
her doors in their richest and newest dresses. It's a duty
to humble any one's pride, who hasn't got money to support it.”

“Bell! come dance with me!” cried Walter, abruptly
appearing before the daughter, who was listening in silence.
The matrons stared; but before they could recover their presence
of mind to deprecate what would have been deemed by
either of them two days before a great honor, Bell had eagerly
and precipitately accepted the invitation.

“Did you ever see such cool impudence!” said Mrs. Crudle.
“But Bell bounced up like a hare from under a cabbage leaf.
She's been used to thinking it a great honor to be noticed by
a Winkle.”

“I'll learn her better. But, then, Walter isn't to blame.
Nor Lucy, either. If they behave themselves, and never put
on airs, we needn't shut our doors in their faces. Poor Lucy!
yonder she sits alone, no doubt thinking on her destitute situation.
I wonder Roland, who has been whirling with Susan,
don't ask her to dance. And the mysterious stranger, who
will not even speak to any other girl, is stalking backwards
and forwards in the hall.”

“Yes, I saw him there. His arms were folded, and he
was in a deep distraction.”

“Abstraction, Mrs. Crudle.”

“It's all one. Both of my girls have got fine partners.
Snobson's family, you know, are invited to Madame R—'s”

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reception; and as for the southern student, they all belong to
the very first families. They don't need certifications of
character.”

Poor Lucy! She seemed truly to be deserted by her accustomed
worshippers. She sat alone in the recess, gazing
mournfully at the merry scene. She had overheard more than
one of her own sex speculating upon the results of her uncle's
marriage, and the indignant abandonment of her aunt; and
she could easily perceive, by the glances of triumph among
those who had often envied her, that her reverse of fortune
was to be for them a matter of exultation, rather than one
of sympathy. She was neglected by her new aunt, and forgotten
by her uncle. Her brother's young friends were flirting
with the Arums and the Crudles. Lowe, with folded
arms, was immersed in one of his reveries, finding a solitude
in a crowd. And as if to confirm her melancholy, she had
been again annoyed by the importunity of Roland, who, after
keeping aloof for several hours, had seized an opportunity to
repeat his declaration, and to urge his suit by all the inducements
which the desire of possessing fortune might naturally
suggest. He did not venture to depict directly the destitute
condition of Lucy, but he knew it would be sufficiently apparent
to one of her vivid imagination, when contrasted with
the vast possessions which he offered to share with her. And
to add to her vexation, she beheld the eyes of Lowe at last
riveted upon her when Roland was urgently pressing his suit!
She was immovable, and her persecutor, without extorting a
peremptory refusal, departed sullenly, and was soon laughing
very heartily with Blanche Arum.

An intermission occurred, during which the band of musicians
withdrew to partake of their accustomed and indispensable
stimulants. It was then proposed by the artful mothers
of the Arum and Crudle belles, that there should be music
at the piano; and above the noise and confusion of conversation
and laughter, the ringing voices of the heiresses penetrated
the ears of all. And at the end of every performance
there was a loud clapping of hands, followed by a simultaneous
volley of compliments.

It was during one of the pauses which succeeded these
storms of plaudits, that the loud and hearty voice of Col.
Oakdale was heard calling for Lucy.

“Where is she? where is she?” he asked, making his way

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through the company. “I must hear her voice, or I shall
never be able to sleep again. Come forth, I say, Lucy
Winkle! Oh, there you are! My dear, sweet girl,” he continued,
advancing to the alcove which Lucy had never quitted,
and where Lowe was now sitting beside her, “do have mercy
on my poor old widowed ears, and regale them with one of
the songs of other days, such as you and my Virginia know
so well how to sing. Come Lowe, bring her along.” The
colonel opened a passage, and Lucy suffered Lowe to conduct
her to the piano. She sat down before the instrument,
without seeming to be conscious of the multitude of glances
directed towards her. She was calm and pensive. Turning
over the leaves, she selected a song congenial to her feelings.
The words had been written by one of the great poets of a
preceding generation, and expressed the tumultuous emotions
and affection of an innocent heart wounded by one who had
been the victim of a wicked deception. So electric is deep
human feeling, that every one coming in contact with it partakes
of its nature and influence. The first notes of the instrument
under the gentle touch of her rosy fingers, imparted
a thrill of softened sadness to every person that heard them.
And when the sound of her exquisitely modulated voice succeeded,
conveying the full inspiration of the poet, by the proper
emphasis, the expression, the gestures—the spell of
enchantment was complete, and not the slightest whisper could
be heard in that vast assembly. And when the last word was
uttered by the fair songstress, and her ivory arm reclined
motionless on the keys, and her bosom rose and fell like the
billows of the ocean after the cessation of a storm, a protracted
silence ensued.

The colonel stood on one side with folded arms, his chin
sunk upon his breast. Lowe, pale, listless, and immobile as a
statue, was on the other. The first movement was made by
Walter, who stepped forward, and encircling the neck of his
sister, bestowed a kiss upon her snowy forehead.

“I will do that too!” exclaimed the bridegroom, rising
spasmodically from the sofa where his spouse had hitherto
confined him. “She is of my own flesh and blood, and I am
proud of her.” But before he could execute his purpose, he
was overtaken by his wife, who whispered a few magical words
in his ear which induced him to resume his seat.

Lowe conducted Lucy back to the dim recess she coveted,

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and then strode out upon the lawn in the moonlight, while the
sad girl, reclining her chin upon her hand, gazed after him
through the glass door that opened upon the terrace. But
she had not long maintained that pensive attitude, before she
was startled by the presence of one, who had never hitherto
ventured to address her except in answer to some interrogatory
relating to his duties behind the counter. This was Mr. Blotter,
the clerk of Fibber, a shopkeeper in the village.

“Don't be down-hearted, miss,” said he, “for every body
who has a heart, can't help feeling for you.”

“Feeling for me, sir?” exclaimed Lucy, in utter astonishment.

“Yes, miss. Every body is saying that your mother will
be poor, now; and Mr. Fibber, my employer, who trusted Miss
Gusset on your mother's recommendation, has ordered me not
to run up a long account this year with the widow—”

“I don't understand this, sir. Pray excuse me,” said
Lucy.

“It means that Mr. Fibber is no gentleman, and next year,
when my time is up with him, and I get my little money from
my guardian, I mean to tell him so, if you will give me
liberty.”

“What do you desire of me?” asked Lucy turning her
eyes full upon the young man.

“All I want to say is your singing made the tears come
into my eyes, and I feel as if I could die to do you any good.
And if all the world deserts you, Miss Lucy, remember that
I, Dick Blotter, am your friend till death. I would marry
you in a minute!”

Before Lucy could utter a word in response to such an
unlooked-for declaration, the shopkeeper's clerk had vanished.
She buried her face in her handkerchief, and her whole frame
was seized with convulsive agitations. Lowe, who witnessed
the scene from his position without, had returned, and was
now standing beside her.

“Lucy,” said he, “who has offended you?”

“Offended me?” she asked, raising her face, bedewed with
tears, and exhibiting the traces—not of displeasure—but of
excessive laughter!

“I see I was mistaken,” said Lowe, turning away, as if to
retire.

“Hear what it was,” said Lucy. She then recapitulated

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what had been communicated by poor Blotter, and Lowe could
not repress the smile which struggled to relax his features.

“But, Lucy,” said he, sighing, and occupying a seat at her
side, which served to shield her from the prying glances of the
flitting company, “the things which poor Blotter has revealed
to you are freely discussed by the guests of your new aunt.
One cannot avoid hearing them, let him turn whithersoever
he will.”

“I am aware of it,” said Lucy.

“Then why not escape such annoyances?”

“How can I escape them? But they shall not annoy
me.”

“How? I have told you. Promise—”

“Edmund—I can promise no more! I have, perhaps,
already pledged too much. You have every information that
can be desired in regard to my family—to my condition and
prospects. Then why do you withhold from my mother the
communication which you say must prove satisfactory? I
will make no further confession. I am pledged never to be
involved in any irrevocable entanglement of the heart without
her concurrence. My word to her shall be held inviolably
sacred. Proceed no farther—cease to refer to the subject—
unless you are prepared to satisfy my mother.”

“Do you doubt, Lucy?”

“I do not! Let that suffice. Urge me no further. My
duty must be performed—shall be performed—even if I survive
it not.”

“Lucy! I love you beyond all human power of expression!
and I never loved another! But why repeat what I have so
often declared already. Would to heaven I were richer. But
I have a sufficient income for happiness in a village—”

“Pray do not speak thus, Mr. Lowe. Your thoughts seem
to be uttered unconsciously, and you may be heard by
others.”

“True. Forgive me. My life of solitude has engendered
the habit. But, believe me, Lucy, whatever others may suppose,
I have no thoughts which might not be uttered within
the hearing of any one as gentle and pure in heart as yourself.”

At this juncture Bill Dizzle, decked in his Sunday
clothes, glided through one of the long folding glass doors that
opened on the terrace, and made his way expeditiously to the

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sofa on which the lord of the establishment was sitting. He
placed a short despatch in his hand, and then stood apart as if
awaiting his orders.

“To arms! To arms!” shouted the aroused Napoleon.
“We are invaded! The enemy are upon us! Let the drums
beat—mount horses—sound the bugle, and away!”

“Stop! Bill Dizzle!” cried the now imperious Mrs. Napoleon
Winkle, seizing the messenger with one hand, and
snatching the despatch away from her lord with the other.
“Don't be frightened, my friends,” continued she; “it is a
false alarm, and intended as a joke. I'll read the intelligence.
`The red boar has thrown down the palings and led the whole
drove into the garden.
' Bill,” said she, amidst the shouts of
laughter that ensued, “whistle up the dogs and drive the pigs
out of the garden.”

Napoleon sank back subdued on the sofa.

“You know, Mr. Winkle,” said his spouse, perceiving his
humiliation, “it was stipulated that I should direct the little
domestic matters which occur about the house. If you had
been in the field, this affair would have fallen under your jurisdiction.”

“Oh, madam, if it be really a false alarm, every one will
be indebted to you for so prompt and complete a suppression
of it; and I shall have cause to congratulate myself on finding
in my spouse so valuable an auxiliary. No doubt when I am
called to the distant north, you will make an efficient regent.”

“Yes. I'll undertake to govern in your absence. But,
you know, it is all a joke. The silly people pretend to say
that you really believe the bulls are the British, the hogs the
Russians, and yourself the great Corsican chieftain. It is not
so—is it? Tell me it was all for your amusement! Tell me
so on this, your wedding night!”

“Of course, my dear, I never supposed such things to be
really as I called them, or as they may have been represented
by others. But every one has some hobby or other, and I
have mine. I sometimes become excited to such a degree
that, no doubt, I am capable of imagining any thing. And
that is my felicity, which I should be sorry to have destroyed.
In childhood our toy horses, and men and beasts, are real
flesh and blood in our estimation. In age, we are only children
of a larger growth, and as long as our infatuations do
not injure others, I think they might be regarded as allowable

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and justifiable. One of the good effects, my dear, of the hallucination
attributed to me, was the accidental discovery of
one I deemed capable of sympathy and disposed to defend my
innocent motives whenever they might be assailed. I need
not name her.”

“I will defend you—you may rely upon it,” said his
spouse, with some misgivings as to the extent she might proceed
with safety in taking possession of the reins. It flashed
upon her understanding, that in the event of a rupture, she
might possibly be expelled from her magnificent home, and
therefore it might be prudent to infuse a particle more of conciliation
in her preliminary measures. There were many
methods of reducing husbands to subjection: but if all of
them should fail, there could be no foe sufficiently potential to
take from her the respectable name of Winkle, and of conferring
the odious one of Gusset upon her again.

The meditations of the aspiring bride were put to flight
by a sudden flash, more vivid than the light of the wax candles,
and which was succeeded by a tremendous explosion of artillery.
A great many slight screams were heard—the dancers
paused in mid career, and the musicians let fall their instruments.
The bride sprang up, pale, and quivering with vexation.

“Oh, Mr. Winkle!” said she, “you promised there should
be none of this.”

“I did, indeed, my dear—and I am one who keeps his
word. I must know the meaning of it. Blore shall be called
to an account. Unless he can show that it is one of the anniversaries
we have been in the habit of—”

“Oh, if you can excuse him on such a pretext as that, he
will not be punished; for I have heard it said that Bonaparte
fought bloody battles on every day of the summer
months.”

“And if he fought, of course he won,” replied Napoleon
Winkle.

Bill Dizzle glided in and placed another despatch in the
hand of Napoleon.

“Dizzle,” said Mrs. Winkle reproachfully, “I told you to
bring no more papers here to-night.”

“How can I help it, mam? They'd shoot me if I didn't
obey orders.”

“It was a mistake,” said Mr. Winkle. “Sergeant Blore,

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you know, has only one eye, and he says the calendar was
blotted. He begs pardon. It is granted. The great battle
was not fought on this day—neither did it result in such a
manner as to call for commemoration. Yet I forgive him.”

“What great battle?” asked several.

“Waterloo! And the sergeant must have been indulging
excessively in strong potations, to forget how that struggle
terminated, since he lost two of his limbs and an eye on the
occasion. But he writes me the cause of the apparent loudness
of the report was the pointing of the guns in this direction.”

“Are they aiming the cannons at us?” asked Mrs. Crudle,
in great alarm.

“There were no balls in them, madam. They fire blank
cartridges on such occasions.”

“Walter,” said Mrs. Winkle, “won't you oblige me by requesting
the sergeant to commit no more such mistakes to-night?”

“With pleasure,” responded the young gentleman, who
was happy to have an excuse for being absent. And in truth
the discharge of the guns had been in pursuance of his instructions.

Towards midnight the guests dispersed to their respective
homes, the Arums and Crudles inviting Parke and Snobson
into their coaches.

Lucy was despatched in Mr. Roland's carriage, which her
new aunt had procured for that purpose, as her own was too
heavy to be driven quickly, and she had promised her sister
to send Lucy home that night.

Old John Dowly and Edmund Lowe were the last to depart;
the one in his old-fashioned gig, and the other on foot,
he being a famous walker.

Then the house was carefully closed under the directions
of Mrs. Griselda Winkle, who now assumed the reins in earnest,
and informed the domestics, male and female, and particularly
the latter, and in the presence of her assenting lord,
that every command she issued was to be implicitly obeyed.
The housekeeper and the cook looked rebellion, but made no
opposition. They knew that Griselda was not an inexperienced
timid miss, for she had long kept a house of her own,
and was familiar with the use of bolts and bars. And when
the doors were made fast, she undertook to allot apartments

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for the various lodgers, having a most extraordinarily accurate
comprehension of the plan and capacity of the fine old mansion.
The females were sent to the most distant chambers,
while Walter's apartment on the second floor was only separated
from her own by the corridor that ran between. The
doors were opposite. Sergeant Blore occupied a small room
at the head of the stairs, communicating with Walter's by a
door in the thin partition. He had long occupied this room,
as it was convenient to his chief, and Mr. Winkle had intimated
a desire that he should continue to sleep there.

Finally the key was turned in the door opposite to Walter's,
and all was still. Not even a retiring step was heard.
The only sound that arose on the ear was the ticking of the
great high clock in the hall below, which seemed to be more
distinctly heard at every successive swing of the pendulum.

Walter, after lying awake some fifteen minutes, arose softly,
opened his door, and descended the stairway in his stocking
feet. He proceeded to the rear door of the hall, which he
opened noiselessly. He then beckoned his confederates under
the spreading chestnut tree. Bill Dizzle came first, and was
followed by a dozen others, bearing muskets, whose burnished
barrels glittered in the moonlight. But not a footfall was heard.
All had divested themselves of their shoes. The door was
carefully fastened after them, and they proceeded in single
file up the great stairway, stepping softly after their leader.
When turning at the head of the first flight, the rays of the
moon streaming through the broad crescent-shaped window
fell upon them, giving them the appearance of a spectral platoon
traversing some haunted castle. Something resembling
a superstitious awe was felt by Walter as he paused and looked
down upon the silent party. He was not, however, to be deterred
by any such consideration; and continued to ascend until
he reached the narrow door leading out upon the roof. This
was raised without difficulty, and the whole party emerged
again into the open air.

The roof was nearly flat, and the eaves were surmounted by
a balustrade, which gave the building a castellated aspect
when viewed from a distance.

Walter posted his men in a line directly over the chamber
occupied by his uncle and aunt, and made them all sit down.
He then suspended a cord from the roof over the window of his
own room, the upper end being attached to Dizzle's wrist. By

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this means signals were to be given. Walter then hastened
back to his room and secured the lower end of the cord. After
the completion of these preparations, he opened the door
in the partition, and reported every thing to the old sergeant,
who had impatiently awaited him, with his great eye blinking
in the moonlight. It had been with difficulty that Walter
prevented the old mutilated warrior from leading the party in
person. It was obvious that his wooden leg not only rendered
him incapable of scaling walls, but made it impossible for him
to advance or retire without producing sounds incompatible
with any plan of secrecy.

“Have they wooden rammers?” asked Blore.

“Yes.”

“And their breeches padded?”

“Yes.”

“And instructions not to let any burning wads fall before
the windows in front?”

“Every thing has been done as you directed.”

“Then creep out and listen if your uncle is asleep. If he
sleeps, he snores. He always does.”

“I heard him snoring before I came to you.”

“Very well, give the signal, and then jump into your bed.
But don't you snore. They might suspect something.”

Walter pulled the string. The next moment the twelve
muskets were fired in admirable order, making but a single report,
and that a terrific one, the echoes and reverberations of
which could be heard for many moments afterwards among the
distant hills.

“Ha-ah! wa-ah!” screamed Griselda, whose lids had not
yet been visited by slumber, in consequence of the distressing
nasal sounds so impolitely vented by her lord. But when the
appalling report overhead rent her tympanums, she sprang
up and screamed with a desperate violence, sufficient almost to
awaken the dead.

“Bless me! what's all this?” asked Mr. Winkle, starting up.

“Oh! they're shooting all round the house! Faugh! I'm
suffocated with the smoke!” It being warm, the upper sashes
of the windows had been lowered to admit the fresh air.

“Sergeant Blore! what does this mean?” cried Mr. Winkle,
fully aroused by the smell of gunpowder, whch he knew
could not be the effects of a dream, or the creation of a lively
imagination. “Blore, I say! D— your eye!” continued

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Winkle, running across the chamber in his gown, “I'll courtmartial
you! Get in bed again, madam. I'll return as soon
as I find out the leader of this party. If Blore is not in his
bed, he is guilty. Honor or no honor—I'll give them a lesson!
I can't find my slippers. Insubordination and disobedience!
The legs of my drawers are twisted. I'll have them all
drummed out of my service! Here's your night-cap, madam.
Blore! Blore, I say!” continued the exasperated commander,
striding across the corridor, and bursting open the door
of the sergeant's chamber.

“Who comes there? Halt, or I fire!” cried the sergeant,
and at the same time cocking a pistol, which could be distinctly
heard by the intruder.

“It's your general, Blore. Don't kill him on his wedding
night. I thought you were the leader of a storming party
that won't permit Mrs. Winkle to enjoy any repose. Have you
been up, Blore?”

“No, sir, upon the word of a soldier.”

“Did you not just now hear the report of musketry under
the very walls of the house?”

“No, sir; you must have been dreaming of battles.”

“No, Blore. Besides, our chamber is filled with the smoke.”

“Imagination.”

“I tell you no! Griselda heard it, and is now almost
smothered with the smell of burnt powder.”

“It may be the devil's breath. I think he is an admirer
of hers.”

“Irreverent monster! How dare you speak in that manner
of my spouse!” Uttering these indignant words, the commander
closed the door violently, and returned to his own
chamber. After reconnoitering the ground from the windows,
and finding no symptoms of animation, he rejoined his spouse,
assuring her that the enemy had fled, and would not be likely
to disturb them again.

Griselda, in tears, vented a great many reproaches, and
succeeded in obtaining a promise that certain reforms should
be instituted in the household.

Then profound silence again ensued, which was, however,
soon interrupted by the snoring of Napoleon, a sound for which
Walter was impatiently listening.

Again the signal was given, and another volley ensued,
more startling than the first. Walter leaped into his bed.

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Blore began to snore. The bride renewed her screams, and
the heavy body of the groom was distinctly heard in its descent
to the floor. Seizing a brace of pistols, Mr. Winkle rushed to
the window, and discharged them through the clouds of smoke
at whatever objects might be standing below, for the earth itself
was invisible.

“I am firing balls!” said he. “It will not be child's play if
any one comes in range. Where is my sword?” he continued,
rushing to the corner where the weapon invariably hung.
“Now, I'll see who it is!” He ran out of the chamber, and
once more entered the sergeant's room.

“Who goes there?” cried the sergeant.

“I! it is Napoleon! The house is beset! My sword is
drawn, and shall not be returned to its scabbard until my enemies
are subdued. Follow me!” He turned about and descended
the broad stairway, while Griselda called upon him in
vain to return. He rushed out into the yard as soon as he could
open the door, by which time the sergeant had joined him, and
they searched in every direction for the invaders. The sword
was thrust into every bush, and Blore was ordered to fire
his pistols at every tree. But no enemy could be found, although
the smoke of the recent discharges descended from the
roof and rolled in volumes over the lawn.

Meantime a suspicion crossed the mind of Griselda, that
Walter might be the contriver of the mischief, and she made
no scruple of satisfying herself on that point in a very direct
manner. She ran into his chamber, and never paused until she
stood beside his bed.

“Are you here, Walter?” she asked, although, at the time,
she held him firmly by the wrist.

“Of course I am,” was the reply. “But what are you doing
here?”

“Oh! had I known I was to suffer thus,” she exclaimed
hysterically, “I would not have married your uncle! To think
I should be so insulted and frightened the first night of my
married life! What shall I do, dear Walter!”

“Go to bed!”

“Your uncle has gone out to hunt the villains, and I am
frightened half to death.”

“What is the matter? What frightens you?”

“Did you not hear it? They have been firing a hundred
guns under our windows.”

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“They have? I must have been asleep. Who did it?”

“No one knows. There! didn't you hear that? It is Sergeant
Blore's pistols. Somebody will be shot!”

“I'll get up and see what it's all about. Go out, Gusset,
till I dress.”

“Don't call me Gusset, Walter.”

“Very well. But I must get up.”

“Do, Walter,” said Griselda, retiring, “and rouse all the
people about the house. Find out the names of the ringleaders,
and I'll answer for it, they will not frighten us another
time.”

Walter manifested great zeal in his endeavors to discover
the guilty party. Every one was roused; and by the
time his uncle and the sergeant returned from their fruitless
search without, every apartment within had been explored,
but to no purpose.

But before attempting again to seek the repose so imperatively
demanded after such unreasonable interruptions, a new
idea occurred to Mrs. Winkle, and the proposition she made
obtained the hearty approbation of her lord. This was to
bring the bull-dog from the garrison, and to turn the whole
pack of hounds loose on the lawn. The order was issued, and
immediately executed; and as the bull-dog was really a very
dangerous animal, the chief solaced himself with the belief
that the house could not be again approached with impunity
by his tormentors.

Quiet being again restored under such favorable auspices,
and one or two blunderbusses having been ordered into Napoleon's
room from the armory, the bride again retired to her
canopied couch—and was just falling into an oblivious slumber,
when Walter gave the signal, and another volley was fired!

The bridegroom tumbled out of bed, and running to the
nearest window, fired the blunderbuss at random, which took
effect among the pack of hounds below, and such a squalling
and howling ensued as never before assailed Griselda's ears.
She screamed, and tore her dishevelled hair, while her lord
gave vent to volley after volley of fierce maledictions. Again
he rushed into the sergeant's room, into which, as into all the
rest, the smoke had by this time penetrated, and again his ears
were saluted with the interrogation,

“Who goes there?”

They descended to the lawn, the chief with his drawn

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sword, and the sergeant with his pistols. No less than four
of the hounds lay wounded and howling on the green sward.
They were despatched for the sake of peace. But they made
no discovery of the offenders.

And Griselda ran into Walter's room a second time, and
implored him, if he were concerned in the annoyance, to cease
for her sake, and for his own sake in the future.

“Do you not see I have been lying quietly in my bed?”
said he. “I am almost determined to get up and go home!”

“I wish you would, and take me with you!” said the
weeping bride. “They have made no discovery,” said she.
“I hear them fastening the hall door again. I will sit up
the rest of the night and watch. What string is this, Walter?”
she continued, having espied the cord that hung down
from the balustrade and entered the window.

“What string? Oh, that's nothing! Let it alone. Don't
touch it! It is a part of a bird's nest above.”

“I won't have birds' nests on the house. Let them build
in the trees!” Saying this she pulled the cord violently, and
the next moment a volley, more stunning than any that had
preceded it, rent the air. Poor Griselda fell fainting in the
arms of Walter, who bore her into her own room, and laid her
on her bed, where he left her. As he returned to the corridor
he perceived his uncle, followed by the sergeant, re-descending
the stairway with all the expedition in their power, evidently
impressed with the belief that the intruders would now stand
revealed before them. But the commander was certainly disappointed,
and he retraced his steps, expressing his belief that
his house was infested by the ghosts of soldiers slain in
battle.

“That may satisfy you,” said his recovered spouse, incensed
at being left alone in her swoon, “but not me. I don't
believe in such things at all. It is a contrivance to mortify
and vex me, and I'll find it out. Let them fire away. They
don't hurt us. I'm not alarmed now. There will be an end
of it in the morning. But I want you to promise that when I
have detected and exposed the villains, they shall never come
about the house again.”

This was readily granted, and soon after the overwrought
Napoleon's snore began once more to be heard. Walter was
listening in the corridor; but now Griselda, who had risen,
was on the alert, and nerved to brave any thing that phantoms

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or flesh and blood might do. She glided to the door, and with
her ear to the key-hole distinguished the breathing of the young
man. She heard him retire to his own room, and she followed
him softly. It was just when he extended his hand to seize
the cord, that his arm was grasped by his aunt. He turned
in dismay, and gazed at her.

“I've caught you, Walter! I understand it now. I
thought the sound came from above. It was a wicked contrivance.
What have I done to deserve this?”

“Oh, it was only a little sport. Don't tell uncle Winkle,
and you shall not be disturbed any more.”

“I shall make no promises, unless you promise—swear—
no—no matter. I have you in my power, now. Beware!
You may escape until the next offence. But the villains shall
be banished from my sight. See! the day has broken, and
the sun about to rise. I will awaken your uncle, and show
him who dared to disturb his peace.”

“No! aunt—dear aunt—”

“It is too late. You may escape, but not the rascals on
the roof. I only wish the foolish sergeant had been among
them.”

She hastened to put her threat in execution, and assisted
her lord in a hasty adjustment of his toilet.

The offending party—or rather the instruments of the contrivers
of the plot—were discovered, and made the victims of
Griselda's vengeance. They were ordered down, and forbidden
to approach the house again under penalty of dismissal
from the service.

Bill Dizzle, however, escaped identification by an accidental
discharge of his musket, which completely blackened
his face.

It was, after all, a great triumph for the mistress of the
establishment, as it afforded her an opportunity of making
many demands of her lord, to accomplish which might, otherwise,
have required much ingenuity and long suffering.

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Although Lucy had listened to so many proposals of a
nature calculated to produce an exaltation of spirits, yet, as we
have seen, she was the unresisting victim of a sad depression
during the progress of the festivities. When the time was announced
for her departure, a scene of contention between the
coachmen of the Arums and the Crudles, for precedence, occurred
in front of the portico, and within her view, while the carriage
which was to convey her to the village was kept in waiting.
She felt no resentment, however, and could not endure any
additional mortification. The tumult of her sensations, and
the whirl of her recently startled thoughts, had not sufficiently
subsided, for her attention to be arrested by the scene of
strife she witnessed; and the imperturbable submission of her
own coachman, prevented him from taking advantage of the
opportunity afforded of departing with his charge, while the
point in dispute between the rival whips was undergoing the
process of adjustment.

Her aunt stood upon one side, and Walter on the other.
Lowe appeared when the Arums and the Crudles drove off,
and assisted her up the carriage steps. He whispered, that
although he would return on foot, he thought he might be able
to keep in view of her, and act in the capacity of a guard.
This was after Walter had intimated that if he were in Lowe's
place he would be Lucy's companion inside; but the intimation
had not been approved by Griselda. The distance was
short, and the moon shone with great splendor.

Mr. Dowly turned his slow pacing horse to the right and
pursued his way directly towards his own isolated mansion.
Lowe bounded forward in pursuit of Lucy's carriage. But
he was not able to overtake it. The driver, hitherto so stupidly
immobile, upon seeing the pedestrian cracked his whip,
dashed several hundred yards ahead, and suddenly halted.
Had Lowe been something nearer the object of his interest,
undoubtedly his heart had been thrilled to its centre. As it
was, he imagined that cries had been uttered.

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No sooner did the carriage pause than a man stepped from
behind a huge sycamore tree, and pulled open the door. He
sprang in, and the horses were again driven at a rapid pace.

“Mr. Roland! What is meant by this conduct?” cried
Lucy, striving to be calm, or rather to repress her rising fears,
as if she could not be convinced that all her presence of mind
and physical strength would soon be called in requisition.

“That I adore you, Lucy! Do not be alarmed, my beautiful
bird. My apparent rudeness has for its excuse the distraction
produced by your maddening charms! We use stratagems
to entrap the sweet birds we treat so tenderly. Be
assured that no harm is intended. I listened to the jeers
of the Arums, the exultations of the Crudles, the depreciating
remarks of every body, upon your destitute condition,
and I resolved to rescue you from such a humiliating predicament—”

“Mr. Roland!” said Lucy, freeing the hand he had seized,
“you confess, then, that this rude and ungentlemanly conduct
was deliberately planned.”

“For your good—for your benefit, as well as mine. I
love you to madness—that is my excuse. Let your beauty
plead for me, as Ann's did for Richard—”

“He was a villain! Heaven forbid that you should be
one, too! Sir! if you hope to be forgiven—if you desire to
be admitted again into my presence—go—I beseech you, leave
me instantly!”

“Will you promise to receive me as a lover—an humble
adoring lover?”

“I promise nothing. I never have encouraged your addresses.”

“I cannot leave you without some pledge upon which to
rest my hopes. I cannot live without you. And why not be
mistress of all I possess—and now? All I am—all I have,
shall be yours. The Arums and Crudles shall triumph
over you no more. Your mother shall be independent. Be
mine to night, and to-morrow your own hands shall consign to
the flames the mortgage which encumbers your mother's
homestead.”

“Leave me, sir, before it be too late to retract or to repair
the insult you have offered me. Yours I never can be. I
would rather subsist on the crumbs that fall from the tables
of the Arums and Crudles, than to share your wealth,

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encumbered with your hateful presence! Leave me before we
reach my mother's door, or I will call assistance—”

“Do not believe, my charming girl, that I am capable of
permitting any such folly. Your unequalled beauty, and my
wild and passionate love, must be my justification.”

“What do you mean? Do you intend to prevent me from
going to my mother?”

“I will take you to a better home. You shall be the
mistress of my house, command my servants, hold my
purse—”

“Let me go!” cried the trembling girl, springing towards
the carriage door.

“No. It is useless for the lovely bird to struggle,” said
he, forcibly withholding her. “Hear me—listen to reason. I
do not desire to take advantage of your helpless condition.
I will prove my sincerity. I have a preacher in readiness, who
shall unite us in holy wedlock. It will not detain you five
minutes. Then, if you will pledge me that our secret shall
be kept until the proper time for divulging it, you may depart
immediately, and no one will be the wiser, until we choose to
inform them. You shall take the mortgage with you, and my
check for any sum you may name.”

“Villain! Unhand me! You will have to answer for
this! It is base—it is cowardly!”

“Lucy, do not spurn my love! The highest born, the
most accomplished, the most wealthy ladies in the country,
have striven to secure my heart and hand. I love you—you
alone, and cannot exist without you. Do not speak of vengeance,
for, distracted by love of you, I have become dangerous.
If you have any affection for your brother, do not betray
him into perilous undertakings. If he assails me, he may
fall—without you, I do not care to live. I am desperate!”

“Let me depart! I ask no more! You shall not be exposed.
But if you detain me longer you will be overtaken by
one who will quickly avenge me!”

“Who? Ah, Lowe! I cannot see your blushes—but I
feel your throbbing arteries! You love him! That is the
secret. A poor, pitiful, insignificant rival! Let him beware!
If you would save your brother and friend from my vengeance—
if you would save your own character from stain — for who
will believe you did not go to my house of your own accord?—
let the parson I have provided perform the marriage

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ceremony. You shall then fly to your mother's roof before your
absence creates alarm—and our secret will be in our own
keeping. No scandal will be uttered, no blood will be spilt.”

“Merciful heaven!” cried Lucy. “And am I thus delivered
into the snare of an implacable demon! Oh, my aunt,
surely you were not capable of participating in this diabolical
scheme!”

“Your new aunt is as much a fool in her way as your uncle
is in his. She was not trusted with my secret. It is in the
keeping only of you and I, and the preacher, who is discreet
and may be depended upon. Consent, Lucy, without more
ado, and all will be well. No mortal ever loved with such
vehemence as I do. I would sacrifice fortune, honor, life itself,
rather than forego—”

“Villain!” cried Lucy, spurning his hand, “I will listen no
more! Leave me, or suffer me to depart! I would rather
be in my grave, than dwell in your presence an hour!”

“The carriage stops. We are at home, Lucy,” said Roland,
throwing open the door. They were in front of his
house.

“I will not go into your house—hateful, dishonorable man!
Coachman!” she continued, in a loud voice, “I command you
to drive me home, to my mother's house!”

“Oh, my love,” said Roland, with a smile of derision half
betrayed by the rays of the moon resting on his profile, “the
coachman has had his orders. He knows his duty. He will
obey you when yonder preacher, awaiting our arrival, has uttered
a few words over our joined hands.”

“Never!” cried Lucy.

“Be reasonable, my charming bride. Every ear will be
deaf to your cries. It will be but breath expended in vain.
Let me assist you. I will carry you in my arms, so that your
feet shall not touch the dew.”

“Mercy! Help!” cried the poor girl, and fainted in the
arms of the villain, who forced her from the carriage. But
at that moment he felt the sharp teeth of Dew grasping his
leg.

“Begone!” he said, endeavoring to shake the animal off.
“The infernal dog is tearing my flesh!” he continued, placing
the inanimate burden on the grass, and turning ferociously
upon his tormentor. Dew relinquished his hold, and barked
fiercely, but avoided the hands extended to grasp him, by

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retreating into a thicket of briers near the road side. Roland
hurled a stone at him, without effect, and turned towards
Lucy, who was recovering. She leaned on her elbow, and
gazed round in bewilderment.

“Drive off!” cried Roland, to the coachman, who obeyed
with alacrity.

“Off! off! Do not approach me!” cried Lucy, seeing the
monster approach, followed by the faithful Dew, who again
seized him.

With a fearful malediction, Roland once more turned upon
his pertinacious foe, and with a determination to take his life.
He was smarting under the infliction of his teeth, and furious
at the thought of being balked by so unlooked-for and apparently
so insignificant an impediment. Therefore he rushed
upon the animal with desperate energy, regardless of the
briery covert in which he took shelter. Dew uttered several
cries as he was torn by the thorns, but still eluded his enemy.
Roland, intent upon the destruction of the animal, continued
the assault, unmindful for the moment of his reviving captive.

Lucy did not suffer the precious moments to pass unimproved.
She started up and ran into a neighboring grove,
which concealed her white dress. Under shelter of the descending
boughs of a spreading cedar-tree, she paused for
breath, and with her trembling hands sought to still the throbbings
of her panting breast. Unseen herself, she could yet
behold Roland striving to kill her faithful dog with a stake
he had snatched from the fence in front of the lawn. Dew
nevertheless effected his escape, and returned to the spot
where his mistress had been lying. Roland, upon seeing the
bird had flown, uttered the most furious oaths and threats.
But in his impatience to extricate himself from the briery
thicket, he was tripped up by a vine that grew among the
bushes, and fell headlong to the ground.

Dew joined his mistress, and they plunged deeper into the
woods. Lucy knew not whither they were going, but was
happy in the thought of escaping an enemy whose presence
was a greater calamity than any other that could possibly befall
her.

Erelong the flying girl discovered a narrow path, partially
illuminated by the rays of the moon straggling through the
branches of the trees. She redoubled her speed, for she could

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hear Roland calling aloud to his confederate (the pretended
preacher), to assist him in the search for the fugitive. Soon
the voice ceased to be heard, and Lucy's spirits began to revive.
Dew ran along before her, evincing by his large intelligent
eyes, and the shaking of his tail, his congratulations
and happiness upon the escape of his mistress from the immediate
clutches of her cruel persecutor. But he had sufficient
sagacity to confine his manifestations of joy to the mute exhibitions
described. The slightest bark might have destroyed
her.

After traversing the path several hundred yards, Lucy
was induced to pause upon coming in view of a fence which
bounded the woods. Beyond were fields and meadows, and
here and there could be distinguished a farm house, its inmates
seemingly steeped in profound repose, while she, who gazed
upon the silent scene, might conjecture in vain why she should
be doomed to be a midnight wanderer in unfrequented paths,
and wholly unconscious of the direction she should pursue to
avoid the impending danger. Wearied, and wounded by the
bushes which had often opposed her progress, she sat down on
the trunk of a fallen tree, and wept in silence. As she turned
her pale face in every direction, and saw no animate object
but her spaniel which crouched at her feet, and heard no
sounds but those of the whippoorwill and the katydid, it more
than once occurred to her that she might be in a dream. She
rubbed her eyes with her lily hands, and looked up at the
stars—“No! no!” said she, in low silvery tones, “it is not a
dream. Would it were!” She covered her face, and falling
down on her knees, uttered an humble petition to heaven
that she might be speedily rescued from her unpleasant condition.

A sound in the path she had traversed attracted her, and
the next moment a rabbit bounded out and sped past. Dew
rose up, but did not pursue it. He snuffed the air in the
direction whence it came, and uttered a low growl, while the
hair rose on his back. Lucy thought she heard a movement
among the bushes; but was not certain. Her heart palpitated
audibly, and painfully. Then she felt certain she could detect
the low sounds of whispers in the dark path behind. She
arose—but knew not where to fly. In the fields were no hiding
places; in the woods she would encounter her persecutor.
Again! It was the low murmur of a human voice! She could

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not be mistaken; and Dew growled more fiercely than ever,
and was in the act of springing towards the foe.

At that moment approaching wheels were heard, and Lucy
perceived that a road ran along the outer side of the fence.
Hope lent her strength, and she bounded over the high fence
as the gig of good old John Dowly drove up. The gentle
horse paused of his own accord, snorted aloud, and thrust forward
his ears, but did not attempt to run away.

“Who are you?” asked John Dowly, staring at Lucy as
if beholding an apparition.

“Save me! Save me! Oh, Mr. Dowly!” cried she.

“I will! Poor thing! Who is it?” responded he, as he
assisted her into the gig. She fainted upon his breast, after
feebly saying, “Take me home.”

The dog barked fiercely, and words of disappointment and
rage could be heard in the woods.

“Merciful powers!” exclaimed the old man, upon driving
into the unobstructed moonlight, and recognizing the face of
Lucy, who began to recover. “My poor, lovely child! how
does it happen that I find you thus, and alone? But do not
attempt to speak, before you have regained your strength. I
will take you home. The next road we cross leads to town.
You are safe, now. Don't be distressed. Old John Dowly
would lose his head before a hair of yours should be injured.”

“Bless you, sir!”—said Lucy. “May heaven bless you!
You have saved me. Another moment, and I should have
been in his power!”

“In whose power, my child? But I need not ask, since
I know too well the diabolical proprietor of these lands.”
Saying this, the old gentleman whipped his horse into a brisk
trot, and turning down the next road, seemed to be intent on
reaching the village as quickly as possible.

But before they reached the village, Lucy had summoned
sufficient strength and resolution to relate every thing that had
transpired. The old gentleman sympathized with her, wept
with her, but counselled her to tell no one else but her mother,
who would doubtless be governed by prudential considerations,
Roland was an artful and dangerous character; and it would
be better to avoid him than to contend against him. He was
surrounded by creatures of desperate character, whose greatest
delight was in the consummation of evil deeds.

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Lucy listened with attention; and shivered with terror at
the thought of involving Walter, or any one dear to her, in a
quarrel with the bold bad man.

Mr. Dowly, when they arrived in front of the widow's
mansion, leapt down from the gig almost with the elasticity
of youth, and conducted his fair charge to the door. Mrs.
Winkle had been long expecting the return of Lucy, and on
hearing the wheels, hastened to the door herself, for Biddy had
been sent to bed at the usual hour.

“How pale you are, Lucy!” said she, when the lamp revealed
the features of her child. “What has happened?
Who came with you?”

“I, madam,” said the old gentleman, whose person was
disclosed when the door turned wider.

“Oh, Mr. Dowly! The one, of all others, I would have
chosen to conduct her home. I am very thankful, sir, for
your kind attention. I am fearful though it has put you to
inconvenience. It is very late. But you need not return—
Walter is away. Pray come in and occupy his chamber.”

“No—no—I thank you, my dear madam. I will drive to
the inn. But with your permission I will call in the morning
and take breakfast with you. Good night. Good night,”
continued the old man, retiring.

When the door was made fast, Lucy fell into her mother's
arms and wept bitterly, and yet with feelings of thankfulness
that she was once more in safety under the roof of her parent.

The tale was soon told, and was listened to without the
widow's usual merriment. She embraced her child repeatedly,
long incapable of utterance, and caressed the faithful
spaniel, who evinced unbounded joy.

“Mr. Dowly is right, Lucy,” at length said the widow,
with seriousness. “He has ever shown a sincere interest in the
welfare of my family. He is experienced in the affairs of the
world, and can foresee evils which those of a less deliberate
circumspection might only feel. If Walter knew what has
occurred, who could restrain him? And there are others
beside who might seek to punish the villain, and might fall in
the attempt. All we can do with safety is to avoid any species
of contact with him in future.”

“But, dear mother,” said Lucy, “we are, as he said, very
poor; and he holds the mortgage on our house.”

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“True. I will write to my brother to pay it. Yet I dislike
making such an application. I am fearful we have not
understood Gusset's true character. I will mention the business
when Napoleon visits us the next time. If Roland
should call for the interest, I will pay him with the money the
Dibbles have deposited in bank. You must not be seen by
him—I shall not fear to meet him. He is rich and influential,
and might have been respected as a rejected suitor; but to
say that one of his age is capable of conceiving so violent a
passion as to be driven involuntarily into such an excess of
outrage—no—no! I can have no patience with him! He
must be a villain. But it may not be prudent to tell him so.
He might declare, and even prove, by some of his profligate
creatures, that you accompanied him to his house voluntarily!”

After Lucy had retired to her chamber, she was impelled
by some mysterious impulse to cast her eyes in the direction
of Lowe's cottage on the opposite side of the street. The
young man's chamber was still lighted, and his shadow on the
wall could be discerned. He moved backwards and forwards
with folded arms and drooping head. Why did he keep such
late vigils? was the query the distressed girl propounded to
herself.

Lowe continued his solitary promenade until startled at a
late hour by the report of musketry, which came booming on
the still air from the country mansion of Mr. Winkle. He
had likewise observed the pause of the carriage which conveyed
Lucy from the mansion, and beheld Roland get into it.
He had no doubt it was Roland. But whether or not the
proceeding had the connivance and sanction of Lucy, he was
unable to determine. If so, then he had been grievously deceived
in her character, and he felt that his fate would be an
unhappy one. But had he ever seen any thing in her conduct,
or heard any thing in relation to her character, which might
warrant a supposition that she entertained a partiality for that
bad man? No. All had been just the reverse. And yet
there could be no doubt of what he had seen. There could
be no denying the fact which he had beheld that night with
his own eyes. Such were his thoughts. “Oh!” cried he,
clasping his forehead, “if she be not pure, where, where is
purity to be found on earth! But may not she still be so?
Might not he have entered the carriage without her consent,

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and in spite of her objections and opposition? Ay, but then
to accompany him—or suffer herself to be driven elsewhere
than to her parents' mansion—and at that late hour of the
night! I am not certain I heard her screams. And would
she not have uttered them loudly if he had forced her to accompany
him in another direction? True, she is not one of
those falsely delicate, mincingly-sensitive creatures, who cry
out at the buzzing of a fly, and she might not have immediately
known they diverged from the proper direction. But
would he, bold and wicked as he is, have resorted to such a
measure in the vicinity of so many returning guests? Oh,
Lucy! if you have been too weak to resist his blandishments,
farewell—farewell for ever! We must never meet again. But
I will know, yes, know—not merely suspect—your complicity
in this act, before I regard you as fallen. But how shall I
know it? From whom obtain the information? Ay, himself!
Yes, Roland—whatever your lips may utter, your face, your
conduct under my gaze, shall reveal enough for my comprehension.
And if you alone are guilty, beware of her
avenger!”

The young man turned aside and threw himself on his
couch. A train of cars at that moment paused before the
inn, and once the lover conceived the idea of rushing into
them and abandoning the place for ever. He was withheld
by the hope that, after all, Lucy's conduct might not prove
to be culpable. Should that hope be fallacious, the next night
he would take his final departure.

He arose the next morning unrefreshed, after a sleepless
night. While tasting the coffee which had been brought in
by Mrs. Edwards, his attention was attracted by one of Roland's
servants who galloped up to the door of Mrs. Winkle's
house. He saw him deliver a letter, which he did not doubt
related to the occurrence of the preceding night. Soon after,
he ascertained from his cook, who had been in his neighbor's
kitchen, that Lucy had arrived at home late in the night, and
was now quite ill.

Supposing Roland would be in the village as usual that
morning, and would come by the road he was accustomed to
traverse, Lowe determined to meet him. Placing a brace of
pistols in a small green bag, he descended to the street and
walked briskly away from the village. He had not gone more
than a mile before he saw the one he was in quest of.

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Roland approached alone, leisurely riding his blooded
steed. Lowe paused beside a large willow tree that overhung
the brook on the road side, and putting down the bag, folded
his arms calmly on his breast, and awaited the arrival of the
author of his unhappiness.

As Roland drew near a supercilious frown gathered on his
brow, and his ruddy complexion assumed a deeper color. He
did not design to utter any salutation, and was riding past
after an equivocal nod, when Lowe advanced a step, and signified
his desire to confer with him.

“Do you wish me to stop?” asked Roland, slightly drawing
the rein.

“I do, sir,” was the reply.

“Well—what do you want?”

“I desire to know if you did not enter Miss Winkle's carriage
last night, when she was returning home.”

“The deuce you do! No, sir—I entered my own carriage.”

“True, it was your carriage. But that is a subterfuge.”

“A subterfuge! Sir, do you know who you are speaking
to?” demanded Roland, in choler.

“Perhaps not distinctly. But I am desirous of knowing.
Be calm, sir; at least until I obtain the information I seek.
Then your fury may have vent.”

“What information do you seek? By what right do you
seek any of me? Have you heard any thing in relation to the
matter you mentioned just now?”

“No, sir; not a word. But I saw it.”

“Saw it? Then what further would you be pleased to
know?”

“Precisely in what capacity you entered the carriage.
Whether as an acceptable companion, or in opposition to the
lady's will. You will much oblige me by answering frankly
and truly.”

“I shall do no such thing, sir.”

“Then I shall be happy to suppose it was not in accordance
with the lady's wishes.”

“Suppose what you please. I care not. But as the lady
herself has not, as I infer, made the matter known, and as you
were the only witness of what transpired, if the occurrence
should be made public, I shall not be at a loss to know who

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divulged the secret. I desire that it be kept a secret, for
several reasons, and I warn you not to mention it, or—”

“What?”

“You will incur my vengeance.”

“I will not refer to it—unless it be to the lady herself.
But, sir, I beseech you tell me whether or not the meeting
was in pursuance of an appointment.”

“You have already supposed it was not—let that suffice.
I will not be interrogated. Who are you? What are you
doing in the village? By what right do you aspire to be the
champion of Miss Winkle?”

“I am a man, sir—a free man in a free country. It is not
necessary to dwell upon my means of living, so long as I owe
no one, and ask no alms of any body. In regard to your last
question, as we are alone, and as I seek information from you
upon which my happiness or misery may depend—know that
I have conceived a deep and pure affection for that young
lady—”

“Ha! ha! The secret's out!”

“Sir! you cannot be a lover, and laugh at such an announcement.
Therefore she must be innocent, and you a villain!”

“What! Do you dare—” cried Roland, raising his
whip.

“Dismount, sir, and you shall have satisfaction,” said
Lowe, stepping back.

“I will dismount and punish you!” said Roland, leaping
from his horse, and supposing the threat might be easily executed,
as he was a larger and stronger man than Lowe.

“Throw your whip away, and meet me as a gentleman
should,” said Lowe, stooping down and drawing forth his pistols.
Taking one in each hand he presented the breeches.

“You are armed. I did not know that,” said Roland, pale,
and pausing.

“Take your choice, sir.”

“No, sir. I am not to be waylaid in this manner. I will
have you arrested as a highwayman.”

“Are you a coward, too?”

“Coward! because I will not exchange shots with a vagabond?”

“Sir, I am a gentleman, better born, and better bred than
yourself,” continued Lowe, advancing. “Take your choice,

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and fire as soon as you please. I will give you that advantage.
I am no duellist—but desperate. I would rather die
than know Lucy to be false, and—”

“I will not,” said Roland, trembling. “I will not take
either. You may murder me—but yonder is a witness.” He
pointed to a solitary pedestrian at some distance who was approaching.

“I am no murderer—but you are a craven and a villain.
Cease your designs upon that young lady, or dread my vengeance.
We will meet again. Go.”

But before the last words were uttered, Roland was mounted
and spurring towards the village. When he was dashing across
one of the slight bridges which span the sloughs through which
the water from the river flowed at high tide, he was thrown by
a sudden side-spring of his horse, and fell sprawling in the
centre of the hard road.

Bill Dizzle, aroused by the clatter of hoofs had suddenly
risen up among the spatter docks, with a huge frog transfixed
and kicking in expiring agonies on his spear. His presence
in the slough was no unusual apparition to man or beast; but
as he had not yet washed the black stains of burnt powder
from his face, the horse had failed to recognize him, and perhaps
supposed him to be the devil himself rising to the surface
of the earth. Hence his affright.

“Blazes!” cried Bill, wading out of the scum-covered
water. “Who is it? There he lays as dead as a frog!” He
approached the stunned and inanimate form, and stood over it
in silent amazement, not knowing exactly what he ought to
do, but strongly impressed with the desire to accomplish something
or other. So, happening to glance towards the horse,
which now stood in the vicinity snorting and trembling, he
ran to him, and taking the reins, tied him to the fence on the
road side. That done, he scarcely knew what to do next. He
returned to the fallen rider, and again stood over him in silent
contemplation, until startled by the sound of approaching
wheels. Fortunately it was the carriage of Dr. Prangle. The
doctor, upon seeing that some one lay in the dust, and doubtless
required his services, did not wait for a special summons,
but descended immediately and opened a vein.

“How is this?” exclaimed the doctor, after seeing that
the blood began to flow. “How did it happen that Mr. Roland,
the best horseman in the county, was thrown?”

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“His critter shied when I riz up in the water lilies,” said
Bill Dizzle.

“And no wonder!” exclaimed the doctor, gazing at Bill.
“It was enough to frighten the d—l himself! So—” he
continued, examining his patient, “limbs all sound—no fracture—
animation returning—a groan—good sign—stunning
concussion though—few bruises—that's all—soon recover—
short case.”

“Dr. Prangle, what is the matter?” asked Roland, recovering
his speech, and seeing the blood flow from his arm.

“You have been thrown from your horse, and may be
seriously injured internally. You must be kept quiet—take
anodynes, and lie still, in bed. Here, you frightful frog-catcher,
help me to lift him into my carriage. I will take you
to my house—”

“No,” said Roland—“take me to the inn.”

“Very good. But you cannot lie there so composedly as
at my house.”

He was conveyed to the inn without delay, while Bill
mounted the still snorting horse and followed the carriage.

Roland, upon being put to bed, smiled at the anxious solicitude
of the doctor, and whispered the innkeeper — one of his
tenants—that he was not much injured, and would be able to
sit up as soon as Prangle left him. And no sooner had the
doctor taken his leave, with injunctions for his patient to remain
in a state of perfect composure, and promising to return
within an hour, than Roland sat up in bed, and vented a
volley of curses on the head of the astonished Dizzle. Bill
retreated in consternation from his presence.

“Send for David Deal,” said Roland, when Dizzle had
disappeared. Deal was an enterprising Quaker, and considered
favorable to the election of Roland to Congress, on account
of sundry moral reform which the Babbleton candidate was
pledged to advocate.

“Friend Ralph, I am sorry to see thee confined to thy
bed,” said David Deal, who happened to be near, and was
ushered into the presence of the invalid.

“It is nothing,” said Roland. “Merely stunned by a fall
from my horse. If it were not for fear of offending the doctor,
and losing his vote, I would not remain here an hour.
David,” he continued, when they were alone, “do you know
the character and pursuit of your tenant in — street?”

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“Thee means neighbor Lowe?”

“Yes. What is his trade, or profession, or pursuit, by
which he earns a subsistence?”

“Thee knows quite as much as I do, or as any body
does.”

“Does he pay his rent?”

“He pays in advance. Thee my be sure he pays me, or I
would not let him stay.”

“The deuce!”

“Friend Ralph, I do no wrong in securing what is justly
due to me. And I hope you will not urge the payment of
the note of mine thee holds, if I pay thee the interest punctually.”

“But does not this fellow owe some one in the village?”

“I think not. I have taken the liberty, as I thought it
not improper, to inquire a little into his transactions. The
shopkeeper, the butcher, the baker, and even the milkman, all
say he pays them down, and seems to have cash enough to
answer his purposes. Thee knows he don't live extravagantly,
and his expenses cannot be very great. But friend Ralph,
what does thee say concerning my note?”

“Confound your note—I don't want money!”

“I am much obliged to thee—for it is very difficult to obtain
funds at a reasonable interest; and it is generous and
liberal in thee to indulge thy friend in such times as these. I
am sorry I cannot give thee any information concerning friend
Edmund. All I know is that he has many books, and is seen
to do nothing but read and write, and sometimes indulge in
the abominable amusement of whist, and in the idle sport of
fishing and gunning. He is also very intimate with Edith,
and seems to have an attachment for her daughter Lucy—”

“The impudent puppy!” said Roland.

“If thee thinks so, the women don't. Edith owes thee a
large sum of money, and it is said she is very poor. I am
sorry to hear it—for she has always been a good neighbor. I
hope she may be able to pay thee thy interest—”

“The mortgage shall be foreclosed, and the property
sold.”

“If it must be so, will thee be a bidder for the lot?”

“No. I have enough real estate.”

“Then if thee would be satisfied with my bond, I would
like to be the purchaser, for a dozen good houses might be

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erected on the front part of the ground and rented for three
hundred dollars each. If it must be sold, and no one will
bid more than myself, I could not be justly blamed for becoming
the owner, although I should be sorry for Edith. I
see such things are unpleasant to thee, and will change the
subject. Thy friends will have a large meeting next week,
and are determined to make a strong rally in thy favor. I
hope thee will be able to address them.”

“I will be able.”

“Thee will be supported by the reformers. It is high time
the evil practices of the people were amended. But, as the
meeting is open for all, they say thy enemies will have their
speakers also.”

“Who will they have to reply to me?”

“Walter Winkle—the college bred son of Edith.”

“He!”

“They say so. But thee knows he is a wild rattling youth,
without experience.”

“He is over twenty-one years of age. Of course he will
vote for Plastic, my competitor. Well, I'll see if he cannot
be humbled. Who proposed this matter of getting up a
speaker to answer me?”

“I learn it was Colonel Oakdale, who thee knows is a candidate
for the State Senate, and is, they say, to be a candidate
for a seat in the Senate of the United Sates.”

“The mischief!”

“That is milder than—”

“The d—l!”

“Yea, verily. I bid you good day, friend Ralph, and I
hope thee will soon be well.”

David Deal, not without some misgivings of the morality
of the candidate of the reformers, withdrew about his business,
which was, it must not be denied, the art and mystery of
money-making.

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Lucy, who had complained of being unwell at the usual hour
for breakfast, upon learning that a letter had been received
from Roland, arose and descended to the sitting-room, where
her mother was perusing the long and passionate communication.

“Lucy,” said Mrs. Winkle, as her daughter sat down at
her side, “Roland writes like a lover. He declares upon his
honor—”

“Which amounts to nothing, for he has none,” interrupted
Lucy.

“That may be. But he says his love grew so uncontrollable
that he was not aware of the gross impropriety of his
conduct, until after your escape, when his own condemnation
of himself, was as bitter as any reproaches it would be possible,
for any one else to utter. He says he is penitent, and
will cheerfully undergo any suffering and pay any penalty we
may impose. He implores our forgiveness, and entreats that
the occurrence may never be referred to again.”

“I will not mention it.”

“I think it should not be known. The Arums and Crudles
would hint that you had not been abducted against your
will.”

“That would be terrible,” replied Lucy, smiling. “I
learned from Walter last night that they abducted his two
friends, almost forcibly. I hope that is Walter ringing.”

“Who is it, Biddy?” asked Mrs. Winkle, when the girl
appeared.

“Dill Bizzle, mam.”

“Biddy,” said Lucy, “I wish you would learn to call his
name correctly. It is Bill Dizzle.”

“Yes, miss.”

“Let him come in, if he desires it,” said the widow; and
a moment after Bill made his appearance, his face still unwashed.

“Mercy on us!” exclaimed Lucy.

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“Don't be frightened, like the horse,” said the frog-catcher.
“It's only the powder. Didn't you hear us last
night? She's in a mighty stew about it, and she's vanished
all the soldiers from the house a'ready.”

“What do you mean?” asked the widow. Bill explained.
But he had the tact to suppress the part Walter enacted.

“I fear your uncle,” said the widow, turning to her daughter,
“has got a mistress at last. Who would have thought the
humble Gusset capable of seizing the reins so boldly, and
holding them so firmly? If we desire a continuance of my
brother's favors, I fear we will have to pay court to his wife.”

“I fear the worst,” said Lucy.

“But what have you to tell us, Bill?” demanded the
widow.

“Only that Mr. Roland has been thrown by his horse,
and—”

“Killed?” asked Lucy, quickly.

Bill related the whole affair and then departed.

“Did you desire to hear of his death?” asked Mrs. Winkle,
laughing heartily.

“No, mother. But it would afford me a feeling of security
to learn that he was disabled from perpetrating any species
of mischief. If he recovers soon, I hope you will permit me
to spend a portion of my time with my aunt.”

“You know, child, that your aunt would not have you,
after disobeying her injunction, and attending the wedding.”

“I do not mean Aunt Wilsome; but Aunt Flora, in New
York.”

“My sister Flora! Why she lives alone. She keeps but
one servant—and I am told her front door is not opened once
a month. She would never visit me, nor invite any of the
family to her house, for fear of the expense. She is in perpetual
dread of going to the poor-house! And I don't know
why, for she had not less than thirty or forty thousand dollars
from my father's estate. I think such a project impracticable.”

“You know, mother, the last time we called on her, when
passing through the city, she seemed to take a fancy to me.”

“Yes, she said she would like to enjoy your company, if
it would not render you miserable to be cooped up in her poor
establishment.”

“And that is just what I desire—the utter seclusion, I

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mean. I will read novels for her from morning till night, and
will be the more contented from a knowledge that visitors
cannot intrude upon my privacy. Indeed, mother, I am
wretched in the vicinity of that bad man.”

“Bad, I fear he is. Among all his explanations and
promises, I do not remember a word about honorable marriage.”

“True, mother—but even the thought of that would be
misery to me. He mentioned it to me. And I am sure I
heard his pretended clergyman utter some foul oaths. Pray
do permit me to write to Aunt Flora!”

“Oh, you may write; and you may go to her, if she desires
it, and will make you comfortable.”

Lucy lost not a moment in commencing a long letter to
her aunt. Fortunately she had acquired an insight into her
character, during the brief visit referred to. Her aunt's sole
pleasure in life was novel-reading, and the work she most admired,
and which indeed proved she was not deficient in critical
acumen, was “The Children of the Abbey.” Hence it
was not difficult for Lucy to excite her relative's interest by
depicting her own wrongs and woes in the light of those of
poor Amanda. And Roland's character and his persecutions
were not dissimilar to Colonel Belgrave's. Lowe was another
Mortimer. Without the necessity of revealing any real
names, Lucy had ample materials to affect the sensibilities of
her aunt; and she was not incompetent to the task of grouping
her characters in the most imposing attitude.

Having finished her letter and sent it to the post-office,
Lucy felt relieved of the burden of painful apprehension
which had oppressed her. Her spirits were recovered, her
headache gone, and she sallied forth in the garden, singing
one of the pathetic songs she loved. Old Dibble and his son
Davy plucked for her the most beautiful and fragrant roses,
and took delight in exhibiting their growing crops, the nests
of the orioles, etc.

After lingering some minutes with the Dibbles, who were
always cheered by her smiles, as their vegetables were by the
rays of the sun, Lucy strolled to the extreme boundary of the
ground, where a row of willows overhung the cool bright waters
of the running brook. There she sat on a rustic seat in
the shade, where she had passed so many happy hours of her
childhood, and where she had often consumed the fleeting

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moments with Lowe, from whom she felt she was now about to be
separated, perhaps for ever.

She continued her low song, uttering in the pauses many
a deep sigh, while the heaving of her bosom attested the sincerity
and depth of the feelings she expressed. It was during
one of those pauses, when endeavoring to recollect some
of the words which had escaped her memory, that she was
startled by the disturbed flight of several birds whose wings
fanned her cheeks, so close had been their confiding proximity.
Upon turning, the object of her thoughts stood before
her, pale, sad and desponding.

“Mr. Lowe! You frightened me, as well as the birds.”

“The birds have taken wing and flown away. I trust you
will not be so cruel as to follow their example. And yet I
never deceived or injured them.”

“Then why should they fly?”

“They know the power of man—the most insidious, wicked,
fearful animal that was ever created.”

“You speak that almost savagely.”

“Sometimes I have the feelings of a savage!”

“Mercy! you frighten me! But I, too, expect to fly. In
a few days it is probable these old familiar haunts will be deserted
by their mistress. I came hither even now to take my
leave of them.”

“Is it so? And you go voluntarily?”

“Eagerly! It will be at my own earnest solicitation.”

“Lucy, there is a seriousness in your manner. Will you
not be candid with the unhappy being who adores you, and say
why you desire to go?”

“Spare me—I would not breathe the reason. My mother
only knows it.”

“But you will be accompanied by some one? And you
will not travel far?”

“By Walter. It will not be known where I shall be sojourning.”

“Mystery! I would it were not so. But Walter accompanies
you?”

“Certainly.”

“And it will be desirable to have your friends ignorant of
the place of your abode? I am sorry for it.”

“There may be reasons why they should not know it.
Oh, Mr. Lowe, do not question me further. Do not seek to

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know why I would withdraw from my friends for a season.
I go to avoid a great misery which threatens me here. Let
that suffice.”

“Lucy, we are now similarly situated. I have my mystery,
and you have yours.”

“And if yours were removed—how often have I said—but
no—not now! yet mine might vanish, if yours were dispelled.
Mr. Lowe, I have already avowed too much. I should have
kept locked in my own breast the—the partiality I felt. But
I have retained sufficient resolution never to take the irrevocable
step you proposed, without my mother's hearty concurrence.
And yet it would seem that my secret should not be
withheld from you. I have the impulse to disclose it, and
would do so were it not for the fear it might imperil your
safety. No such motion can withhold you from disclosing
yours. Between friends—between those who—there should
be no secrets unrevealed, mysteries unexplained. But let us
part in peace, and await the time when there shall be no
necessity for any more reserve. I doubt not you are justified
in concealing what you are so reluctant to impart. Then,
Oh, doubt not me!”

“Ah, Lucy! I understand it all. Your secret is known
to me. The danger you apprehend is past. We met this
morning. He is both a villain and a coward!”

“What do you mean? What am I to understand by your
words?”

“That I know every thing, up to the time the carriage
diverged from the road it had been traversing. I saw him
enter it. Then I saw no more, until I met him this morning
and he refused to fight me. Look not so ghastly. It is not
the subject of conversation, nor will it be. I was following
your carriage, and beheld him enter it.”

“Cruel—cruel Edmund! You would not attempt a rescue,
supposing it possible I might be a willing captive!”

“I was not mounted.”

“No matter! I was the victim of your ungenerous suspicions!
If it had been a sister—a wife—there had been wings to
your feet! No horses could have escaped your pursuit. Be it
so! But learn that you did me great injustice. It was Roland—
the monster above all others whom I most dread and despise.
I can only say I escaped from him by means of the interposition
of my faithful dog. I go to avoid his persecutions. That

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is my secret. Let it suffice. You say you witnessed his intrusion—
and although you did not interpose in my behalf, yet
you sought an explanation of him, and offered him combat.
You have an acknowledgment of my gratitude, although I
could not have wished to see you imperil your life on my account.
Farewell. He will not be likely to divulge his own
baseness, and there can be no reason why you should disclose
the unhappy predicament in which I was involved for a brief
interval.”

“Stay, Lucy! One moment more!” cried Edmund, seeking
to detain her.

“No, sir! I will say no more. And I must labor under
the painful apprehension that what I have already uttered,
may not be credited by you, since my truth was doubted
once.”

Just at that moment a tremendous plunge in the bushes
on the margin of the brook, followed by a great splash, arrested
the attention of Lowe, and accelerated the retreating
steps of Lucy.

“Blazes! But it's a whopper!” said Bill Dizzle, rising up,
with a great frog struggling in the agonies of death on the
point of his spear. “Mr. Lowe, Mr. Lowe!” he continued,
“I followed him more nor a quarter o' a mile. See what
lovely eyes he's got!”

Lowe, frowning, strode away, laboring under the painful conviction
that he had both wronged and offended Lucy. She had
left him almost in anger, certainly in affliction from the thought
that he could be capable of doubting the propriety of her
conduct. And she had not, and perhaps would not, inform
him of the place of her future abode.

“Mr. Lowe,” persisted Dizzle, following him, “I came to
hunt you, when I found the frog. I come to tell you all
about Mr. Roland's being flung by his horse—”

“Hah!” exclaimed Lowe, his ear attracted by the name of
Roland. He listened attentively to Dizzle's narration, and
was then moving forward again without uttering any remark
on the occurrence, when Dizzle proceeded to add the substance
of what he overheard in the conversation between Roland and
the Quaker, for he had lingered near the door.

“No matter. I fear him not,” said Lowe; “but I thank
you, Bill. Do not let that base creature lead you into evil
practices.”

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“I'll try not, sir; but I'm bound to vote for him.”

“Why are you bound to vote for him? I supposed it was
only in monarchical governments where landlords exercised
such control over their tenants. This is a land of liberty, and
he is a democrat.”

“All I know is, if I don't vote for him, my sister will be
turned out of her cabin. She told me so herself. But I don't
like the way he talked to-day.”

“It matters not—to me,” said Lowe, turning aside, and
leaping across the brook, leaving Dizzle to stare after him, and
at his frog, alternately.

The unhappy man shut himself up in his chamber, a prey
to many painful meditations. But, resolved to rend asunder
the cloud which enveloped him, he started up after sitting for
more than an hour in deep reflection, and crossed over to Mrs.
Winkle's mansion to seek another interview with Lucy. Having
obtained admittance into the hall, he learned from Biddy
Boggle that her “missus” was engaged with a Mr. Parke, a
friend of Walter's. And in confirmation of the statement,
he heard Lucy's voice, repeating the song which had produced
such a sensation at her uncle's party. Passing by the parlor
door, he sought Mrs. Winkle, whom he found in her usual sitting-room.
She received him with her accustomed smile.

“Sit down, Mr. Lowe. Lucy has informed me of your
interview at the brook, and that you are acquainted with the
fact of her having been captured by the enemy last night.”

“It is really so, madam. And I came here to entreat her
pardon for the obtuseness—I will not call it doubt—which
restrained me from making an attempt to rescue her. Most
humbly do I beg her pardon; and you will please inform her
of my contrition, and humble petition to be forgiven, if she
should persist in prolonging my banishment from her presence.”

“Certainly, sir—and I can, besides, assure her that there
was a serious earnestness in your aspect and manner. But
Lucy intends to banish herself.”

“And she has declined imparting to me the place chosen
for her seclusion. Perhaps you will be kind enough to inform
me?”

“No. I must not interfere. She may have good and
sufficient reasons for declining. You have had your mystery—
now she has hers. There should be none on either side—

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but one will counterpoise the other. Love's comedy of stratagems!
I must not interpose to disarrange your plots—only
I can warn you that woman's wit is the keenest. Lucy and I
have a perfect understanding with each other. She is never
to marry without my concurrence, and I am never to attempt
to impose on her any choice of mine, contrary to her wishes.
But I may say, so far as we can see and know, that is, if there
be nothing hidden to create obstacles—it is my opinion that
Mr. Lowe, if he should resolutely continue the pursuit, may
win the race. But Mr. Lowe must choose his own time to
make the requisite explanations, and Miss Lucy must enjoy
the same privilege. That is fair, in love. Well? Who's
there?” she continued, addressing Biddy, who appeared at
the door.

“Biz—Diz—Dill Bizzle, mam.”

“Here, Biddy, give him this note. It is for Walter. Tell
him to be sure and see him.”

“Yes, mam.”

“Walter has forgotten the friends who accompanied him
from the city.”

“And Lucy, I presume, is entertaining one of them during
her brother's absence.”

“True. It is a sister's duty. And if he should fall in
love, it will be no fault of hers.”

“You mean if he should not,” said Lowe, smiling faintly.

“Poets and novelists would persuade the world that such
is the character of the sex. It has been a wonder to me, if
they possessed such an accurate knowledge of our dispositions,
why they are not generally more fortunate in the selections
they make themselves. But is not Lucy free?”

“Oh, certainly.”

“Then, until the irrevocable words are spoken, take a
woman's advice and eschew jealousy. And, really, if Lucy
should fortunately meet any one preferable to yourself in her
estimation, she must be at liberty to embrace him—I mean to
listen to his offer, to hear his account of himself, etc.”

“Oh, yes!”

“Well, why sigh about it? But for the purpose of mitigating
your despair, I suppose I may be permitted to say that
the place which has been selected for Lucy's abode, is not one
where it is at all probable she will meet many strangers.”

“It is a relief to know that,” said Lowe. “I suppose, Mrs.

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Winkle,” he added, when rising to depart, “Lucy informed
you that I had sought a meeting with Roland, and that the
result merely exposed his pusillanimity. He threatened to
denounce me as a highwayman. I do not fear it. Nor do
I fear he will seek to injure Lucy's character. Hence the occurrence
of last night may be easily suppressed.”

“Roland has written me an apologizing letter. He admits
his madness—but says it is the result of love.”

“Preserve his letter. He is a villain. His conduct made
me forget myself and offer him combat. I do not think I
could again be provoked to repeat such an indiscretion, and I
fear my conduct on that occasion is not approved by Lucy.
Nothing short of defending her honor, could induce me to engage
in mortal strife with an enemy, in a country where there
are laws to vindicate the injured.” Lowe departed.

CHAPTER XIV. THE BRIDE TAKING POSSESSION—MISS WILSOME WINKLE RESOLVES TO MARRY.

Walter, after the amusements of the night, slept rather later
than usual; and upon making his appearance in the breakfast
room, he learned that his uncle and aunt had taken their repast
an hour before. But the thoughtful Griselda had kept
his coffee hot.

It was just when his breakfast was finished, that Walter
espied outside of a window about half of the weather-beaten
and war-worn face of Sergeant Blore. His eye was rolling in
great excitement, and he secretly beckoned the young man to
approach.

When Walter joined the sergeant, the latter led him into
a sentry box in the vicinity, and cautioned him not to speak
loudly, or make any noise that might attract attention.

“What is it?” asked Walter, in a whisper.

“The emperor has almost abdicated,” said Blore, in distressful
accents, while his eye was moistened with a tear.

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“They call it a treaty—but it is an abdication. I was compelled
to sign as a witness.”

“What is all this? What have you signed?”

“A capitulation!” continued Blore—“the most humiliating
and disgraceful terms!”

“Explain, sergeant, explain.”

After many lamentations, the sergeant informed Walter
that his uncle had been attacked early in the morning, by the
housekeeper and cook, and had fallen back discomfited on his
wife, who undertook to afford him security and protection on
certain conditions, which had been agreed to, written down,
and signed. They were substantially as follows: Mrs. Winkle
was to have the purse—Mr. Winkle the sword. In all civil
affairs, she was to be supreme—in all military matters he to
be the head. And in pursuance of this convention, the keys
of the treasury were placed in the custody of Mrs. Winkle,
who could at any time discharge the garrison, by withholding
the pay and rations! The sergeant, however, foreseeing the
possibility of such a contingency, and with a single eye to his
own interests, had caused an article to be inserted, that his
name should be retained on the pension list during the continuance
of his mortal life.

“Three cheers for Gusset!” said Walter.

“No! Hush!” said Blore, placing his hand on the young
man's mouth. “She might take umbrage, and I tell you she
is the absolute mistress of the establishment. She will be a
tyrant—another Catharine. I know a vixen when I see her.
Let me tell you a secret. I was married once, and thought
some time or other to marry again—but I won't! No! I
would rather lose the rest of my limbs. You know Mrs. Edwards?”

“Lowe's scolding old housekeeper?”

“She! That she wolf! I intended to marry her, as a
sort of companion for your uncle's spouse. My first wife was
a scold—a tigress. Mrs. Edwards loved frogs, and as our
tastes were alike, I thought we might agree together. I paid
her a visit, and what do you think?”

“I think it a wonder she didn't bite off your nose. But
I believe she has no teeth. Didn't she explode like a
bomb?”

“No—she screamed, and tried to throw her arms around
me!”

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“What—the first visit?”

“She had seen me a thousand times before! Mrs. Edwards,”
continued the sergeant, in a very low whisper, “was
Mrs. Blore!”

“Your own wife?”

“True—as I was at Waterloo! I thought her dead—and
as my Maker can witness, I hoped so. She thought the same
of me, and I have no doubt, hoped the same. One half of me
was shot away, and I was reported dead. She married again,
and her second husband was drowned, instead of hanged.”

“I would have given something to have been present at
the meeting,” said Walter.

“Oh, I fell down and begged for quarter, which she
granted, on condition of a certain indemnity—”

“Wherefore? You were going to marry her as Mrs. Edwards—
why not take her as your own wife?”

“I would rather go to the d—l at once! There was always
a h—l in my quarters when we lived together. But I don't
want to pay the money I promised. She has no right to it.
I want you to get me the opinion of a lawyer. You needn't
mention names. I have the money. For forty years I have
spent nothing, and have been laying up all the time. All I
have I will give to you—”

“To me, sergeant?”

“Yes, to you—and you will need it, for your aunt here
will stop supplies from your uncle's chest—if you will only
keep me out of the clutches of that she d—l!”

“I'll send her to the penitentiary for bigamy, if you have
no objection.”

“Objection? It would be the most glorious news since
the emperor's escape from Elba!”

“But you shall keep your money. I will not have it.
Enough of these family affairs. I want to try my uncle, I
hope he may be reformed, for the doctors say an excessive indulgence
in such hallucinations may terminate in confirmed
insanity. I am curious to know to what extent he can be
influenced by his wife. Have you had the mortar I sent up
put in the boat?”

“Yes, and the bombs, too. All is ready. Shall we make
the bull bellow?”

“Yes. But how can you do that?”

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“By shaking a piece of red flannel on one side of the
Channel.”

“Then go about it. I will be with my uncle in his cabinet
when the messenger arrives.”

When Walter joined his uncle, the latter was finishing the
perusal of Alison's account of the camp at Boulogne. He
closed the book with a sigh, and said:

“I fear the days of glory are over. What a spectacle it
must have been to see such an array of military strength
assembled in view of the cliffs of England! And the profound
dissimulation of that unequalled genius! No one suspecting
the point where the blow would fall! All supposing
it was really his intention to imitate Cæsar in a descent upon
the coast!”

“His was undoubtedly the greatest genius the world ever
produced,” said Walter.

“True, Walter; and I have often sat upon my horse and
fancied I saw how his victories were won, and enjoyed his
triumphs. But I fear I have indulged too much in such mere
fancies. Griselda says so—and she says, moreover, the people
insinuate that my mind is partially deranged. It is not so.
Nevertheless, my own people act sometimes as if I were an
idiot, and would suffer any indignity. Think of their rudeness
last night! My wedding night! But your aunt shall
punish them as they deserve. She is a sensible woman,
Walter; be kind to her. I have placed great power in her
hands.”

“She and I were always good friends, uncle. But, sir,
have you seen the mortar I sent you?”

“Not yet; I ordered it to be put in the gunboat cruising
in the Channel, and did intend to go on board before breakfast.
But you know how I was disturbed last night, and I
slept later this morning than usual. Griselda, though, was
up before the lark, and wheedled me out of my purpose.
What brought you here?” he continued, addressing Blore's
messenger, who came bowing into the room.

“The bull is bellowing, sir, with his face towards the
camp, and he's pawing up the ground, and lashing about with
his tail.”

“I'll go! Tell Blore to man the gunboat. Come, Walter,
we'll have you along, to witness the performance of the

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mortar. We'll have a cruise in the Channel, and a few shots at
John Bull.”

Walter followed his uncle into the orchard, and in the direction
of the camp of Boulogne. When they entered the
garrison, they were hailed by enthusiastic huzzas, and Walter
saw the red flannel (it was a shirt) which had exasperated the
bull, thrust quickly under a gun.

The provocation removed, Johnny returned quietly to his
browsing, notwithstanding the presence of his chiefest enemy.
Then the old commander and Walter, followed by the allotted
crew, entered the gunboat, in which the mortar had been
placed, and began to cruise in the Channel. Every now and
then the mortar was discharged, throwing wooden balls which
had been picked up in dilapidated ten-pin alleys. They were
watched in their courses, and marked where they fell, to be
used again. Walter and the sergeant had likewise prepared
some bags of sand, with powder and fuses, to explode in the
air.

Thus they amused themselves, until the gunner, neglecting
to elevate the piece sufficiently, one of the balls taking a
horizontal direction, struck the orchard fence at a weak point
and prostrated it. Immediately the whole herd of cows and
giddy heifers passed through the breach and ran down to the
margin of the water, while the old bull, on the opposite side
of the Channel, lifted his head and muttered something deep
and low, which they seemed to understand, although it was
incomprehensible to the men. But they were soon made to
understand the meaning of such communication, for the cattle,
after slaking their thirst, plunged forward and swam over to
the green island.

“Treason!” cried Napoleon—“they are going over to the
enemy! Fire at the bull, and row ahead of the deserters!”

He was obeyed. A sand-bag bomb exploded over the
head of Johnny, but did not seem to intimidate him. He
ran into the water and drove back the boat, the oarsmen declining
a collision with him, and enabled the cows and heifers
to land without further opposition; and when upon his territory
they evinced much joy by playful gambols and fantastic
feats of agility.

In vain did the men endeavor to effect a landing at the
various accessible points. No sooner did they approach the
soil, than the bull charged them, and drove them back into the

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waves. Once he succeeded in getting one of his feet in the
boat, and came near sinking it. At another time he tore off a
portion of the gunwale with his horn, and caused such a body
of water to flow in, that the powder was spoilt, and of course
the gun was silenced. Then the men were ordered to withdraw
from the hostile coast.

But the enemy, not satisfied with repelling the assailants,
pursued them in terror. The blood of the bull was up. He
plunged forward with the determination to annihilate his
tormentors.

“Row! row!” cried Napoleon, “or we shall be drowned.”

The oarsmen required no peremptory order to exert themselves.
The case was an urgent one, and they had quite as
much at stake as their commander. They plied themselves,
therefore, with all their powers of propulsion, and steered for
the battery, from which discharges were fired in quick succession
at the undaunted pursuers.

“Put in ball! fire metal!” cried Napoleon. But they
had no balls, fortunately, for they might have shattered the
boat to atoms, and involved friends and foes in one common
fate. As it was, the burning wadding of the cannon fell in
the boat, and would certainly have ignited the powder, and
blown them up, had it not been dissolved in the water.

At length, when the boat approached the muzzles of the
guns, the bull curved gracefully round and swam back to the
cows and heifers, and just as they began to exhibit symptoms
of a disposition to follow him.

When the discomfited party sprang out upon land, Walter
was met by the faithful messenger, Bill Dizzle, and received
the note sent by his mother. He stepped apart to
peruse it, while his uncle fell asleep reclining against the root
of an apple tree, so completely had he been overcome by exhaustion.

Meantime Mrs. Griselda Winkle had not been idle. After
the departure of her lord, she sent for the housekeeper, to attend
her in a sort of royal progress through the apartments.

“Mercy on me!” she exclaimed, when the door of the sergeant's
room was thrown open. “Why this looks like a prisonroom,
Mrs. Acrid!”

“Good enough for the old owl,” was the reply.

“But not good housekeeping, Mrs. Acrid. I have been
accustomed to see my rooms kept clean and sweet—”

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“Sweet! I don't know how you'd go about making that
old beast's room sweet. I have to hold my nose every time I
come into it. You might as well talk about making a skunk's
bed sweet.”

“Mrs. Acrid, we will confer more particularly about that
presently,” said Griselda, proceeding next to the chamber
Walter had occupied. “Bless me!” she continued, “the bed
has not yet been made up.”

“Nobody will want it before night. There is no need for
being in a hurry,” was the reply of the sullen housekeeper.

“Worse still!” cried Griselda, when they entered the
chamber she had occupied herself. “Every thing just as I
left it! The bed not made—the floor not swept—the basins
and jugs not emptied—”

“Certainly they ain't, mam! That's what I was talking
to Mr. Winkle about this morning.”

“You were talking to him about it?”

“To be sure. I wanted to know if you wasn't to keep
your own room in order.”

“And what did he say?”

“He said he'd speak to you.”

“He did.”

“Well. Then I suppose you know why your room is in
the pickle you put it in. And it won't do to empty the things
out of the window, I never did so, and I've been keeping this
house twenty years.”

“Mrs. Acrid!”

“Well, mam!”

“What do you suppose will be you duties hereafter?”

“Duties! I've always done what I pleased, and when it
was convenient, and I never had such sour looks before. If
any change is to be made, I am the one to make it. I will
leave. I gave him warning this morning. My month's up
to-morrow.”

“There will be a change, Mrs. Acrid. When servants
hire themselves for wages, they must perform their duties—”

“Servants!” screamed Mrs. Acrid, throwing up her
hands.

“Servants!” echoed the mulatto cook, who had been watching
and listening.

“Certainly—servants. Are not wages paid you for performing
certain services?”

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“I never before heard any body in this house called a servant!”
said the housekeeper.

“Nor I nother! I won't be called one!” said the cook,
exhibiting her bust a moment, propped by her arms akimbo,
and then disappearing, and retreating towards the kitchen,
slamming all the doors after her.

“Who was that?” demanded the pale imperturbable
Griselda.

“The cook. But she'll cook no more in this house, if she's
to be called a servant. If you want her to stay, you'd better
take back your words, and apologize. I won't stay either, if
you don't apologize to me. Nobody will stay to be called a
servant, by one who was once an apprentice, and afterwards a
milliner, who done her own cleaning, and emptying and filling!
You should recollect that, mam, if you want to live pleasantly
in this house.”

“Mrs. Acrid,” said Griselda, her white lips quivering, and
at the same time holding her purse with difficulty in her trembling
hand—“what wages do you receive?”

“I get compensation, mam—sometimes they call it salary.
The last time I threatened to leave, Mr. Winkle put it up
from eight to ten dollars a month. He soon found he couldn't
do without me!”

“Here are ten dollars Pack up your things and be off
as soon as you can!”

“Me! I—I—I'll see you in Jericho first!”

“No impudence! You have your wages. Go! Mr. Buck,
the constable, is below awaiting my orders. If you make any
disturbance, or refuse to obey, I will have you arrested and
sent to prison.”

“Me? sent to prison?”

“Yes, you—for stealing your master's spoons. The robbery
last year has been traced to you, instead of the soldiers.
Do you recollect a certain Abraham Laban, a Jew?”

“Lord 'ave mercy on me!” cried Mrs. Acrid, falling down
on her knees. “Oh, mam, have pity on a poor old helpless
woman, and save her from disgrace!”

“If you depart peaceably, you shall not be molested.
You have stolen enough since you have been here to keep you
from want. Go, and enjoy it if you can. In fifteen minutes
you must be out of the house—and mind! if you carry away

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any thing not your own, you shall answer for all your thefts.
There is an eye upon you. You are watched.”

Then Griselda descended to the kitchen, where she found
the cook tossing the pots and pans about in most reckless confusion.

“Well, cook,” said she, smiling sardonically, “I have
finished with the housekeeper. I must now have an understanding
with you.”

“That's not my name!” said the cook, whirling round and
facing Griselda with a fierceness designed for intimidation.

“What is your name?”

“Amanda Ann.”

“Very well. But why do you keep the kitchen in such
bad order? The floor is covered with litter and filthy rags,
and none of the vessels are clean. All the tin is rusty and
black—”

“La, mam, nobody has a right to come in the kitchen to
criticise things! Who ever heard of the like! I'm mistress
here—and if I'm to be interfered with, I'll pack up my duds
and leave—that's what I'll do!”

“I'm mistress over all—all the rest are my servants.”

“I'm nobody's servant! I'd starve first. I've cooked
in the richest families in the city, and have never been called
a servant. And what's more, the ladies of the houses—and
they were ladies, too—never came meddling with my business.
I won't stand it! You may get somebody else that will—but
I won't!”

“How much is due you?”

“Two months. You needn't turn up your nose at them
frogs—”

“Throw them away. I will have no more frogs cooked.
If Blore won't eat chickens, he may fast.”

“I shall do no such thing!”

“I will, then!” and Griselda, snatched up the tongs and
cast the frogs into the slop barrel. “Here are your wages,”
she continued. “You must leave immediately. After hearing
your impudence, and ruining the condition of things in
this place, I would not for the world eat a dinner of your
cooking.”

My cooking! You! You, who have lived on potato pairings
and tripe!”

“Go! Mr. Buck the constable is waiting in the next room.

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If you do not depart quietly, I will make him arrest you for
stealing your master's chickens. You can no longer sell the
poultry, and subsist the rest on frogs. Mr. Buck says you
have been sending him chickens and butter for several years—
and he thought Mr. Winkle had the money. I could send
you to the penitentiary.”

“I beg pardon, mam! Don't have me taken up, if you
please! I'll do any thing you want me!”

“Then leave the premises in ten minutes.”

Griselda had no Mr. Buck in the next room; but she had
held several conferences with that astute functionary before
her marriage, and had obtained valuable information from
him. He had been her next door neighbor, and promised very
readily to become an auxiliary. He was from the land of
steady habits and the clime of keen perceptions. The bride's
antecedents he would know nothing about, if her future could
be made advantageous to himself. But if there was no Mr.
Buck in the next room, there was a housekeeper and a cook
of Griselda's own choosing, whom she had provided for such a
contingency as had just happened. She now joined them and
related what had occurred, to their infinite satisfaction. And
when the old domestics had departed, with their trunks preceding
them in a cart, the creatures of the mistress emerged
from their hiding-place in great glee, and entered with
alacrity upon the discharge of their duties.

Then Griselda retired to her chamber and arrayed herself
in one of the splendid and costly dresses she had secretly provided
for such an occasion. Little did Miss Wilsome Winkle
suppose, when she slighted the retired milliner, in the fashionable
street of Philadelphia, that the pale creature, humble
and obscure as she seemed, was at that moment meditating one
of the most lofty triumphs of woman's ambition. Long before
that day had the quiet milliner designed to become the bride
of Napoleon Winkle. She had studied his character, and ascertained
that the accomplishment of such a project was easily
practicable. Therefore, having every thing in readiness, the
demure Gusset, when so unceremoniously dismissed, as she interpreted
it, from the mansion of the rich and aristocratic old
maid, walked deliberately forth, with the firm purpose of having
the wedding consummated without further delay. And it
was a matter of secret exultation that she was enabled to settle

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the matter definitively the very next day, and that, too, almost
in the presence of the high-bred Wilsome.

Of course the retired milliner had not forgotten any of the
requisite adornments of the bride. It had been her vocation
to furnish the most beautiful habiliments for others, and there
could be no reason why she should not provide fitting apparel
for herself. Hence, not only her wedding garments, but her
second and third day dresses, were all in readiness before the
time was settled for the nuptials.

When Griselda descended to the hall, she was met by her
husband and Walter.

“My beautiful bride!” exclaimed Napoleon, “I must have
a salute at parting, for I see the coach is awaiting you.”

“How you are bespattered with mud!” said Griselda,
after receiving the kiss, and glancing at the soiled exterior of
her lord.

“The infernal Eng—no—my dear, the bull. He attempted
to effect a landing, for the purpose of storming the batteries
and spiking our cannon—but—but did not succeed. When
will you return?”

“To dinner, at four o'clock. I must hasten to explain to
our friends why you have deemed it proper to dispense with
the ordinary etiquette—”

“Do. Say it was my will—and that I preferred the society
of my wife to a mob of other people's wives and daughters.
Will you not take Walter with you? He has been
sent for by his mother, and must go, I suppose, although I
shall miss him.”

The chief then bowed with dignity, and strode into his
cabinet, while Walter conducted his aunt to the carriage, which
he was surprised to find had been furbished up exceedingly.
The horses, four blacks, were in glittering harness, and the
coachman wore a hatband of gold lace, and large silver buttons
on his coat.

“This is comfortable, Gus—” began Walter.

“Gusset no more, Walter,” replied she quickly, placing her
magnificent fan against his lips. “But it is comfortable, as I
intended it should be. I will be comfortable and happy the
balance of my days. And all those who have sneered at the
humble Gusset, because she was once a milliner, shall see and
feel my importance.”

“Don't put on airs, Gusset—when we are alone, you must

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allow me to call you by your old familiar name. But don't
hold your head too high in Aunt Wilsome's presence, or my
mother's. The fortune uncle Napoleon has, you know, came
from my grandfather, and should not be used as a means of
piquing any of the family. We were of the aristocracy, Gusset,
and you know that you can have no such claims to consideration.”

“I am as good as most of the proud people of Babbleton.
They made their fortunes in the shop, or their parents did
before them. Fortune is every thing, as I have observed all
my life. And now my fortune is made.”

“Very true. But you should be kind, charitable, and
generous; and not make use of the power you derive from my
uncle, to resent affronts given to the milliner.”

“I am old enough to know my duty, and shall have the
resolution to perform it. I would be pleased to have the
friendship of my husband's family; but I can scarce hope for
it. Your uncle loves you as a son, and you have always been
a pet of mine. You could do nothing to offend him, irreconcilably,
and I would bear much from you. Yet, Walter, let
me warn you not to join my enemies in their enterprises
against me. Be my friend, and you will reap advantages from
it. You may lose the friendship of your proud aunt in the
city, but you will have mine. And rely upon it, as your
enemy, you would have more to fear from the than her. Recollect
that you are poor—”

“Say no more about that!” replied Walter, angrily. “I
have been thinking several times of the consequences of this
marriage, and am just beginning to realize them. I have been
too thoughtless. Why did you wish to marry my uncle?
You, an old maid, and he an old man! If I had had my wits
about me, I should have prevented it!”

“You might have prevented it. You are the only one
who could have prevented it. But my wit was the most available.
Let us now understand each other, and act in concert.
I know your power with your uncle, and you know mine. You
might produce discord, but hardly a separation. I might procure
your banishment, but it would alienate the affection of
my husband.”

“There need be no difficulty. You have only to be kind
and respectful to our family. My mother always liked you—
but she never dreamed you ambitious or vindictive. There

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will be no change in us, unless there is in you. But you
must not restrain my uncle unreasonably—that is, you must
not seek to balk his good intentions towards his family.
Act thus, and you may be happy, and we contented.”

“It will be a hard task. However, I shall not be the first
to commence hostilities. But I will put up with nothing from
the rest, that I can put down.”

“A pun, Gusset. But here we are, entering the town,
with the whole population staring at us. Where will you
stop first?—at our house?”

“No. At the Arums. Mrs. Arum was at your uncle's
mansion—your mother did not come.”

“The deuce!”

“It is not to resent your mother's absence—but to gratify
the Arums. Before we part, Walter, I have one thing further
to say. Previous to my marriage, Mr. Roland did
every thing he could to accomplish my wishes. In return, I
never omitted an opportunity of recommending him to Lucy.
Whatever may occur between them hereafter, always remember
I had in view nothing but what I deemed an honorable
and advantageous match. I used Roland as one of my instruments,
while he vainly supposed I was an instrument of his.
I believe now, that he has no idea of matrimony; and if
what I have heard be true, he is a bad man—a dangerous
man—and I feel it my duty to warn you against him. Lucy
needs no warning, for she always disliked him. I shall cut
him, and defy his worst. He may say he helped to make the
match—but I shall laugh at the boast, knowing it will never
reach the ears of your uncle.”

Walter then sprang out and hastened to his mother's mansion,
while the proud dame descended in all her glory at the
door of the Arums, which was thrown open to receive her.
Mrs. Arum embraced the now great lady. A week before,
she would not have been seen speaking to her in public.
Her daughters were entertaining Mr. Snobson with all their
might at the piano, playing and singing, while Mr. S. leaned
upon the corner of the instrument in a trance.

But all of them surrounded Mrs. Griselda in the parlor,
and uttered felicitations. Mr. Snobson inquired after Miss
Lucy, who, he said, had created quite a sensation with her
voice, and might do well on the stage. If she had any disposition
to make a fortune in that way, he thought he had

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influence sufficient to procure her an engagement, and interest
enough with the press to secure her a fine reception.

“Do you mean Lucy Winkle?” asked Griselda, who still
entertained the most friendly feelings for her husband's
niece.

“I heard she was poor, and I thought it a pity for one of
her thrilling powers of voice to remain in obscurity. She is
not so perfect as some I know in her performance,” he continued,
with a significant glance at the pleased sisters; “but
she sings with effect. It is a pity she is not in society.”

Griselda made no reply to the coxcomb, but answered the
shower of questions asked by the admiring ladies, who were
in high delight upon learning that the bride had done them
the honor to pay them the first visit. After mutually exhausting
their vocabulary of endearing epithets, Griselda
arose, and was assisted into her coach by no less an attendant
than Mr. Snobson himself, amidst the admiring gaze of the
people in the street, and the sarcasms of the neighbors peeping
from the windows. The parentage and wealth of Snobson
being already known in the village, it was no small distinction
for the retired milliner to be waited on by him.

The next place at which the coach stopped was in front of
the Crudle mansion. Here, too, a rapturous greeting was
received by the bride. The old lady and her daughters, who
had been expecting the visitor, ran down the marble steps and
assisted Griselda to descend, while Mr. Fibber, whose shop
was in the vicinity, held open the door of the coach. Fibber
had once refused to credit Gusset for a few yards of dimity—
but this was Mrs. Winkle, the spouse of one of the largest
landed proprietors in the country.

“We've been playing all the morning for Mr. Parke,”
said Miss Susan, when they were seated in the parlor.

“We think him a delightful young gentleman,” said Miss
Sally.

“He's altogether of a different cast from Snobson,” said
Mrs. Crudle; “for I've heard my husband say that old Snobson,
the father of this young man, used to run about the
streets shaving the paper of merchants for the capitalists, and
received a commission for performing the dirty work.” Snobson
had neglected the Crudles.

“I thought Virginia Oakdale would have been at your
delicious party,” said Miss Susan.

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“I begged her to come up,” said Griselda; “but I did not
hint what was going to happen.”

“Oh, then she wasn't invited!” said Miss Sally, tossing
her curls aside. “But do you think she is to be married to
Walter Winkle, now?”

“I did not know they were ever engaged,” said Griselda,
suggestively.

“Nobody knew it,” said the other; “but every body suspected
it. Of course it can't take place now, since he has no
prospect of a fortune.”

“And then, poor Lucy,” said her sister, “what will become
of her? Mr. Roland, I am sure, never had any serious intention
of marrying her. And as for the stranger, Mr. Lowe, I
hope she won't be fool enough to throw herself away on one
who may be, for what any body knows to the contrary, a refugee
from justice.”

“Fugitive, my child,” said her mother.

Griselda really possessed a superior mind to the rich parvenues
who had long looked down upon her with disdain, and
she was not slow to perceive, being now elevated to their level
in the estimation of the world, that no difficult task would be
imposed on her in the maintenance of her new position.

She drove next to the widow Winkle's, and was received
in the usual manner. There may have been more than usual
interest evinced in her reception, but there was no bustle, no
parade, no adulation.

Colonel Oakdale and young Parke were in the parlor, and
they uttered their congratulations without irony, and without
the warmth of expression which seeks to win the favor of a
great personage. Griselda now felt that she was in the presence
of her superiors, and sought to make no display. She
even looked with pain, at the fine clothes she wore, and which
had so completely dazzled the Arums and the Crudles. No
one asked her the price paid for her jewels, no one lauded the
imposing ostentation of her equipage.

On the contrary, when Walter came in from the post-office
with a letter in his hand, the bride ceased to share the attention
of the company.

“Why do you smile, Walter?” asked the widow, seeing
her son was amused.

“I have a letter from Aunt Wilsome—a characteristic one,
and that, you know, would make any body laugh.”

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“I hope it contains no secrets,” said the colonel, “so that
I may have the pleasure of hearing it read.”

“But it does, though,” said Walter, “and must not be
read in public, at least a portion of it.”

Griselda, supposing that her wedding would be referred to
in no flattering terms by the old maid, cast an imploring look
at Walter, who understood its meaning.

“Since it has become fashionable for old bucks of my
years to marry,” said the colonel, winking at Griselda,” I
think I must fall in too. And I don't know a better match
for me than Miss Wilsome Winkle.”

After the laughter which followed the serious expressions
of the colonel, while delivering his speech, had subsided,
Walter remarked that he was very sorry the colonel had not
announced his intention a few days sooner.

“Why so, sir?” demanded the colonel. “Is your aunt
so beset with admirers that a few days sooner or later can
make any difference in one's prospects?”

“I am sorry to say they can. My aunt has selected
another.”

“Walter!” cried his mother and sister.

“It is true. She is to be married; she says so herself,
and does not impose secrecy on me.”

After this announcement Griselda departed, and was conducted
to the carriage by the gallant colonel, who, however,
returned to speak with Walter.

“Are you really serious?” he asked, on re-entering, and
seeing the widow and Lucy eagerly perusing the letter.

“Never more so in my life, I assure you. And now that
my other aunt has left us, perhaps my mother will not object
to having the letter read aloud for the entertainment of the
company.”

“By no means, Walter,” said the widow. “But it is
true, sir; she announces her purpose of marrying.”

“I am sorry for it upon my life,” said the colonel, “for I
hoped her fortune without obstruction or encumbrance would
descend to Walter and his sister. Surely the old folks are as
mad as Napoleon Winkle's bull. When do you visit the city,
Walter?”

“To-morrow, sir.”

“Then bring home Virginia. Tell her I am getting fretful,
living alone. And remember to prepare your speech for

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the great meeting. I will have all the rich men of the
county there, and we'll see if we can't surfeit these fierce reformers.
Good day.”

After the colonel had departed the widow and Lucy retired
for a brief space to peruse the letter more carefully. It was
truly a characteristic one. “Isolated,” she said, “from all
family connections, influences and endearments, by the late
ill-assorted and most disgraceful match, which I alone denounced,
there is no other alternative but for me to establish
new connections, and to seek other associates, who will better
appreciate the importance of family standing, and more rigidly
conform to the rules and requirements of good society. I
shall therefore turn my back upon all my kindred, and cease
to know any of those who approved or sanctioned my brother's
foolish marriage with that impudent hussy. My deceased
brother, your noble father, had, I think, the largest share of
my father's fortune, and I suppose your mother is amply provided
with money—although I don't pretend to know any
thing about such matters. I can't tell what I possess myself,
and never bother my head about it. I suppose if one has a
fortune, and don't throw it away, it still remains. I have
not thrown mine away, and never will. If your mother has
dissipated hers, she was a fool for it, and should suffer for her
folly. I hope the impudent Gusset will scatter her fraudulently
acquired fortune, and so lead my silly brother Napoleon
to repentance. I hope she will lead him by the nose.

“If I see so plainly the imprudence of such disgraceful
matches in others, you may suppose I shall be careful to avoid
falling into the like silly practices myself. It is true I intend
to marry. My nuptials will be celebrated some time during
the present year. But the man of my choice will be a gentleman
of distinction—a genius of celebrity. You know him,
Walter—Mr. Pollen, the poet. If he is poor—if he has been
sometimes, as you informed me, without a shirt—that is no
disgrace. How was it with Chatterton, Defoe, and even
Milton himself? And what lady in the world would not
have been honored by being the wife of a Chatterton, a Defoe,
a Milton? Shame upon the ladies who permitted them to
languish in poverty! I will set an example for the wealthy
ladies to follow hereafter. Genius is the very highest kind of
aristocracy, because it cannot be conferred by mortal man, nor
taken away even by the detracting tongue of women.

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Farewell. Present my adieus to your mother and Lucy. We
will not meet again, unless it be accidentally, and then it is
probable there will be no recognition on my part, and I desire
there shall be none on yours. You may say to Mr. Lowe that
a visit from him would be agreeable to me I believe him to
be a gentleman, and would have no objections to his society,
if he could answer one or two questions satisfactorily. You
may say to him that although I am resolved to marry, I don't
expect to feel what the silly girls call a romantic passion for
any man. I don't believe in any such nonsense. I want a
partner at whist as much as any thing else.

“And now, I care nothing for what the world may say. I
despise the world, as a Christian should.

“Your Aunt,
Wilsome Winkle. “P. S. I have, since writing the above, received one of the
most beseeching letters I ever read in my life from Ralf Roland.
He begs me to conciliate Lucy in his behalf. Roland
is rich, and may be a congressman. What does Lucy want?
Tell her I approve the match. It is true Roland's father
came dangling around me when I was a simpering miss, and I
believe my father kicked him out of doors, for some nonsense
or other, I never knew exactly what, and was too young to
understand the meaning at the time. But he was a fine personable
man, and rich—and I am sure your grandfather must
have been difficult to please. It it true Roland was a rake—
but any wife of spirit ought to be able to correct that. It is
besides a vice peculiar to the aristocracy. Tell Lucy, if she
will be sociable with Roland, and hear my speeches in his
favor, she may come to my house and remain as a favored
niece until her decision is formed. If she marries Roland,
she will afterwards have access to my society. If not, she
can return and be henceforth a stranger.
“Farewell, “W. W. “P. P. S. While writing the last line, a decayed tooth in
my under jaw broke off, and all the rest fell out. You see
how they blotted the paper. I must go to the dentist and
have the root extracted—and I must not go alone. Come

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down immediately, Walter, and accompany me. You will be
my guest as formerly until I am done with you. “W. W.”

Mrs. Winkle laughed heartily at the letter, while Lucy
was vexed and thoughtful.

In the parlor, George Parke was entertaining Walter with
an account of Snobson's dereliction, which was in part owing
to the deteriorating insinuations of the Arums and Crudles.

“Lucy won't grieve. She saw to the bottom of his shallow
pate at a glance,” said Walter. “But if he repeats any
of the slanders of the Arums—”

“He will be careful not to do that,” said Parke, “for he
is continually hoping you will not take offence, and begging
me to explain and apologize for him. But he is high in favor
with the sisters. In their eagerness to captivate him, I saw
them pouting and making mouths at each other. No doubt
when alone they pull each other's hair. Poor Snobson! they'll
sing him and talk him to death; and if they should require
any assistance their mother will aid them. I don't think he
can escape.”

“I hope not,” said Walter, seriously. “But how did the
Crudles serve you?”

“Oh, they found out that my grandfather was Vice President
of the United States, and my father a Senator in Congress,
and they seemed to be enchanted. I was perfumed
with their curls, dazzled with their diamonds, and ravished
with the beauty of the worked borders of their petticoats, of
which I had continued glimpses. They know exactly when I
will graduate, and having unwittingly told them my age upon
entering college, they have calculated how old I will be when
I leave it.”

“Ha! ha! ha! Poor fellow!”

“I can't decide which is the most agreeable; and you
know I can't have them both, unless I join the Mormons.
Oh, you would laugh to hear them ridicule the Snobsons!
Their own pa, they say, is vastly richer than the broker, and
will some day do nothing but live on the interest of his money.
Poor creatures! They need not fear but they can have husbands.
Their attractions will secure them lovers. I hope
they may find honest men, who will take care of the wealth
their enterprising father amassed in the shop.”

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Walter's mother and sister interrupted the conversation
at this point. And in reply to an inquiry from the former,
Walter announced his determination to visit the city that
evening—not so much, as he confessed, to oblige his aunt, as
to comply with the order of Colonel Oakdale. And both he
and George Parke set out for the city in the late boat.

CHAPTER XV. WALTER'S CURIOUS QUARREL WITH VIRGINIA—A STROLL WITH THE POET—THE JEW—LOVE AND LAUGHTER—THE DENTIST.

Upon reaching the city Walter and his young friend proceeded
first to the residence of Dr. Nitre, as the most attractive
point, and not doubting that Miss Wilsome would remain in
tact until the former should find it convenient to wait upon
her. The latter had determined to depart in the evening train
for the college, where he learned there were letters awaiting
him, and he desired to pay his respects to the young ladies
before setting out. And Walter wished his attendance so
that Julia might be entertained while he conferred with Virginia,
whose failure to write him as usual, and as had been
agreed upon between them, rendered him apprehensive that
something injurious to his interests had occurred during his
absence.

When they were ushered into the parlor, they found only
the doctor and his good lady, who had just been engaged in
one of those little episodes in married life, called family quarrels,
which will still happen occasionally in the best regulated
establishments.

“Oh, I'm glad to see you!” cried Mrs. Nitre. Your arrival
is most opportune.”

“Hush, madam!” said the doctor, aside, after heartily
shaking the hands of the young men.

“No—no, doctor,” continued she, “I want the young
gentlemen to know what a singular, selfish, abstracted man
you are.”

“Deuce take her!” whispered Walter, “she's abusing her
husband again before her guests!”

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“Just think of it!” said she—“Here we have had Virginia,
I don't know how long, and no party—no visitors! And
Dr. Nitre's practice worth five thousand dollars per annum!
No one visits us. No respect is paid to our niece, and simply
because the doctor won't encourage people to come.”

“My dear, I forget every thing else when treating my
patients.”

“That's it! he confesses his culpable neglect. Don't you
think it a great shame, Walter?”

“No, upon my word! I am not at all sorry to hear Virginia
has been secluded from society.”

“I'll tell her! But you agree with me, don't you Mr.
Parke?”

“Most certainly, madam.”

“I thought so! Now, Dr. Nitre—well! he's gone!” The
doctor had slipped away, winking at Walter.

“May we not have the pleasure of seeing the ladies?”
asked Walter. “I hope they are at home.”

“Oh yes. Of course they are at home. They would
never be guilty of paying the first visit! Did you come in
your aunt's carriage. If so we'll have a nice moonlight drive,
and make the doctor take his tea alone. No? I'm sorry for
it. But we shall have a promenade. I'll send down the girls
immediately.”

Shortly after Mrs. Nitre's departure Virginia and Julia
appeared—the latter in gay spirits—the other rather grave.
But as had been agreed upon between the young men, Julia's
attention was at this time engrossed by the southern student,
and Walter succeeded in detaching Virginia from her cousin.

“I have not received a letter since we parted,” said Walter,
in a low voice.

“For the reason that it was not written,” was replied
promptly, if not pettishly.

“But was there any good reason for not writting? I am
sure I wrote twice. I hope they were received.”

“They were received, sir. Here they are, unopened.”
And she placed them in his hand.

“Virginia! What have I done to deserve this?”

“Enough.”

“And will you not tell me?”

“Have you not been in the habit of exhibiting my letters,
and even giving them away?”

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“No! Upon my soul, I have never been guilty of any
such baseness.”

“I suppose it would be denied. But what is a mere denial—”

“I'll swear to it—”

“No—don't! Pause. I say what is a denial, or even an
oath, against the evidence of one's own eyes?”

“Your own eyes! Virginia—”

“Call me Miss Oakdale, Mr. Winkle.”

“If any other person's eyes were to bear such testimony,
I would pronounce them false, perfidious, perjured—”

“Stop, sir! We'll see. Another person's eyes shall bear
witness with mine. I suppose you will believe your own eyes.
Here,” she continued, drawing another letter from her pocket—
“here is one of my letters, which I received from the hands
of a certain young lady, with whom I am informed you have
but a slight acquaintance. Do you recognize it?”

Walter gazed in utter astonishment at the familiar superscription.

“I would forswear my own eyes,” said he, “if they alone
beheld it. But, Virginia—”

“Miss Oakdale, Mr. Winkle,” she interposed.

“But there is some mystery here, which must be explained.
I never, so help me Heaven, gave that letter to any young lady,
or to any one else. I thought it was locked up at home—”

“Oh yes! And you asserted that they were kept next to
your heart!”

“It must have been so! It must have dropped from my
breast.”

“Then it was time to cease writing to so careless a correspondent.
But there is no proof that you lost it; and you
must pardon me for demanding a satisfactory explanation. I
had it from the hands of a young lady who came for the purpose
of returning it to me. I did not know her. She did
not stay to be interrogated. That is all I know. You should
know the rest.”

“I know no more of that young lady, or how she obtained
the letter, unless she picked it up in the street—or robbed my
escritoire—than—than—”

“Whom? you are at a loss for a figure of speech. But
no matter. You will have an abundance of leisure to

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investigate the subject. In the mean time write me no more letters,
but return those received from me.”

“Are you serious, Virginia?”

“Miss Oakdale, Mr. Winkle; I am, and if you do not obey
me, I will never speak to you again.”

“You will let me have them again, if the unlucky appearance
of this one be satisfactorily accounted for?”

“I promise nothing. Then I shall not be obnoxious to
the charge of falsehood. Expect nothing, and you cannot be
unpleasantly disappointed. Be satisfied that I permit you to
attempt a vindication.”

“But in the mean time—”

“All is suspended.”

“But your father directed me to conduct you home.”

“He shall be obeyed. When do we set out?”

“I can't say, until I see my aunt who sent for me.”

“If she sent for you, why did you come here first?”

“I loved you more than my duty—”

“I believed you once.”

“And I wanted an explanation of the cause why you had
not written.”

“You have it. Now go. I will explain to my aunt. She
takes it for granted you will remain, and will insist upon it if
she sees you again. When you are ready to return to Babbleton
call for me—not before.”

“Walter,” said Parke, rising, and looking at his watch,
“I must go, or the cars will leave me. I will, if possible, run
down to the village next week to hear your speech.”

“And I should like to hear it,” said Julia, exchanging
glances with Parke.

“You are to return with me, you know,” said Virginia,
“and aunt is to spend a week at Cape May.”

The young gentlemen departed, one for the depot, the other
for the Winkle mansion.

Walter was admitted just as his aunt and her affianced,
Mr. Pollen, were siting down to tea. His aunt, dressed in her
usual fantastical style, applauded his promptitude of obedience,
and said she had not expected his arrival before the
next morning. But she was glad to see so ready a response
to her summons. Pollen greeted his young friend very cordially,
and thanked him for the loan of his shirt, adding that he was
now provided with an abundance of his own. He then

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repeated to Miss Wilsome, the particulars of their nocturnal adventure
at the Jew's den, at which she laughed very heartily.

“Such incidents in the lives of men of genius,” said Wilsome,
“are the most interesting portions of their history. And
I shall insist upon having your biography, dictated by yourself.
I will hire an amanuensis for that purpose.”

Pollen bowed in grateful acknowledgment, and really considered
the words she had spoken, when he thought of the position
and the wealth of the person uttering them, as one of the
most felicitous speeches which had ever been addressed to him,
and if such a thing had been possible, he would doubtless have
fallen in love with her.

“Employ me, aunt,” said Walter. “I am idle, and want
something to do. Indeed I must do something to make a
living.”

“To make a living! Your father's fortune was ample.
He couldn't take it with him. Pooh—nonsense—the Winkles
are rich. Nevertheless, if you should be competent, and
would undertake the task—”

“I will answer for my ability to do him justice,” said
Walter—“and my lively and discriminating aunt shall figure
advantageously in the work. Oh, you shall be handed down
to posterity!”

“And she shall be!” said Pollen, his fine pale face beaming
with animation. “Authors are generally poor. They
live in poverty, and die in destitution. Then the literary
scavengers pick their rags from the gutter, and thousands
with more dollars than brains are startled at the tale of
their indigence and suffering, and lament they had not met with
and relieved them, and thus linked their names with immortality.
They too, die—they must die—and I fear they are
d—d. But they are not remembered by the next generation,
while the works of the starved, the contemned, the insulted
poet, are decked in gilt morocco, and placed upon the gorgeous
centre-tables of the rich and the fashionable! Yes,
Miss Winkle, your name, as one of the discerning few, will
not be swallowed up in the dark jaws of unrelenting oblivion.
They may call you eccentric, imprudent, mad, if they
please, but you possessed the noble generosity, the divine
impulse of charity, to relieve the distress of one whose works
have been pronounced the emanations of genius. No, madam!
In future years, whenever the name of Harold Pollen is

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mentioned, yours will be referred to as the angel in human
form who rescued him from destruction. Recollect what
was said of Homer:—



“`Seven Grecian cities strove for Homer dead,
Through which the living Homer begged his bread.”'

Walter watched his aunt closely. There was a twinkle of
the eye which portended a tear, and he had often heard it said
that she was incapable of shedding one. She lifted her handkerchief
with the utmost care, and applied it slightly to the
lower lash, and above the paint. But the spasmodic quiver
satisfied him that she was not devoid of noble emotions.

“That speech,” said Walter, “shall be interpolated in the
book.”

“I see you are laughing at me, Walter!” said his aunt.
“So, for fear that some of your own nonsense may be added,
I shall look over the proof-sheets myself.”

“Why, aunt, I understand they are to be his posthumous
memoirs; and you can have no reasonable expectation of surviving
him.”

“She may,” said Pollen; “it would be no unreasonable
expectation. I have seen my end. It is not in the distant
future.”

“Pooh! Nonsense! Change the subject,” said Miss
Wilsome. “How dare you start such a dismal topic, Walter?
Sip your tea sir, and then if nothing else occurs, we will have
a rubber.”

“Not to-night, aunt. Mr. Pollen and I have an appointment—”

“So we have,” said the poet, quickly. “But we will endeavor
to be back in time for a game.”

“If you have an appointment, it must be kept,” said Miss
Wilsome, “and I presume it is not my privilege to demand
the nature of it, or to suggest that it might be postponed.”

“It might be postponed,” said Walter, “if I were not
compelled to return to Babbleton before another night.”

“Why are you compelled to return?” asked his aunt.

“Because I promised Col. Oakdale to conduct Virginia
home to-morrow, if you did not see proper to detain me
longer.”

“Perhaps I will see proper to do so. So you may be here

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another night, if I desire it. But you will not take Virginia
back with you.”

“Why, aunt?”

“I won't tell you—just now. I may, if you return in
time. Oh it was a fine adventure. I found it out, sir! Take
care of your hair, when you meet Virginia. I warn you
against her talons. I could dispel the mystery, however, and
enable you to explain satisfactorily. But if she laughed as
heartily as I have done, there might be danger of a rupture
of a blood-vessel.”

“Aunt!” said Walter, “I will remain, if—”

“Go about your business! I don't believe you have any
other engagement than a desire to smoke a cigar. Go—and
make haste back.”

Pollen and Walter departed immediately, the latter wondering
what adventure and mystery his aunt had referred to,
and if it had any connection with the origin of Virginia's displeasure.

“Do not be cast down,” said Pollen, supposing Walter's
abstraction to proceed from the change in his prospects since
the marriage of his uncle. “Your aunt has informed me of
the ridiculous choice of your uncle, and of her displeasure, and
determination to cast off every member of her family who
failed to take umbrage at it. She has even expressed an
intention to marry; and if such a thing should ever happen—”

“Should ever happen!” exclaimed Walter, in amazement.
“Do you not know it will happen?”

“I? Certainly not. All I know about it is, that she has
expressed such a purpose several times. I was silent. I did
not choose to manifest any dissent from such an idea, though
I thought it strange, since she has taken me into her favor,
that she never intimated who was to be the happy man.”

“Is it possible?”

“It is as I tell you. Do you know him?”

“Thou art the man!” said Walter, placing his hand on
the poet's shoulder.

“Me? No. It is a mistake.”

“It is no mistake. She has informed me of it herself. It
is strange, however, that she should have withheld the information
from you—you, who must certainly be as deeply interested
in the matter as any one. But you know the manner

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of my imperious aunt. You have been complacent in every
thing else, and to oppose her will in this, is what she has not
conceived to be possible.”

“She shall soon be undeceived, then! Had I not been
blind and stupid, I might have suspected something of the sort
was meant! But who could have supposed that one old
enough to be my mother—one, no matter! Return with me,
until I open her eyes. Marry your aunt, and defraud the
proper heir! I would rather starve in the street! No, no.
I have observed the injustice and misery of such alliances, and
will never be guilty of that which I have condemned in others.
Let us return!”

“No!” said Walter—“do not yet undeceive her. It
might kill her; or it might make her your enemy.”

“Is it true there is no such thing as disinterested friendship
on earth? I thought she had selected me as the object
of her bounty, because she believed I had merit, and because
the rest of mankind had combined to sink me with their neglect.
I deemed her brave in opposing the world, and nobly
generous in assuming an object of odium, one with whom no
human being sympathized, from despair and destruction.
After all, her motive was merely to obtain a husband!”

“Men and women were made to marry,” said Walter.
“There was no harm in that.”

“But women were not designed to marry their grandsons!
However, it was never my design to be a permanent pensioner.
I hoped to repay her favors, and hope so still. I am
in her debt. She has satisfied my creditors; clothed and fed
me. I owe her so many dollars, and perhaps some gratitude.
Thank Heaven, hope is not extinct in my bosom, or else an impenetrable
darkness would prevail. I have two volumes ready
for the press, and a single one ere this has repaired a man's
fortune and made him an undying name. My name has been
won. No earthly power can annihilate it. And if only one
or two of the daily papers would say what they honestly think
of the merits of my works, there would be purchasers enough
to lift me above the reach of the talons of want. If such a
thing should happen, I will reimburse your aunt—”

“No—you will do no such thing,” said Walter. “She
would not receive your money. She would deny that she ever
expended any for your benefit. No doubt she has forgotten
all about it. She is not mercenary—but she is Wilsome. If

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you break with her, she will abuse you—but she will never allude
to any advances of money. On the contrary, if the rupture
be not so violent as to make her forget she has a purse, it
is quite likely that after denouncing you, she will share it with
you, and then dismiss you with her curse.”

“I would rather have one's curses, for dissatisfaction with
my person, my manners, my mere caprices—and if it be a luxury
I have long enjoyed it—than bear the scorpion stings of
just reproaches—reproaches for having perpetrated a deception;
or for having failed to recognize the claims of a son of
genius, who perished from neglect, for—”

“Pardon me for interrupting you, But whither do we
go?”

“Fate has led us towards the den of Abraham Laban, the
Jew.”

“And we will enter and try our fortunes. We may know
whether there be any good thing in store for us, from his anxiety
to rob us of the greater portion of it. If he be not
disposed to treat with us—then, indeed, the prospect is gloomy.
But Pollen, in regard to this curious aunt of mine, will you
listen to reason?”

“Yes—a little.”

“Then do not break with her abruptly. Do not absolutely
decline her offers. Postpone the time of separation, if you
cannot wed her, and must separate. She is enormously rich,
and does not spend one tenth of her income. It could not
be better bestowed than on you. Both gold and genius are
given by our Maker, and the one should be subservient to the
other. She may abuse you when you part, revile you when
severed, but will never cease to luxuriate in the remembrance
that she once entertained a poet under her roof. And the
more she expends on you the happier will she be. It will be
the most sensible expenditure she could make, and afford her
the most satisfaction when she reflects upon it afterwards.
She will never reckon the amount expended, and therefore my
advice is that you do not neglect the present opportunity of
partaking of her liberality. Undoubtedly she will resent
your abandonment of her; but rely upon it, she will never
permit any one else to censure you. I know her well. On
the contrary she will denounce all her rich friends for not
dividing their fortunes with you.”

“Walter! you almost persuade me to marry her. For

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my own part, I might be contented to do so; but the world,
posterity, would attribute unworthy motives—and—I will
not do it! That is my irreversible decision. But I will not
break with her abruptly.”

“Enough. Now let us enter the Hebrew's infernal regions.”

They were admitted by the ministering young girl the Jew
employed in the capacity of door-keeper, that she might seem
to have an honest occupation.

Abraham now bestowed the most of his cordiality on the
poet, to his infinite surprise.

“We come to have our fortunes told,” said Walter, occupying,
unbidden, a chair.

“Told down, I suppose,” said the Jew. “It is the way
with all. It is astonishing that so many hundreds rely upon
me for fortunes, and at the same time condemn me for my
gains. Yet, how could I furnish so many with money, if I
did not derive it from others? If I did not reap profits, my
purse would soon be exhausted, and then the Jew could assist
no one. Blind, ungrateful fools!”

“And that's as true as any speech Shylock ever made.
But Abraham, you were disposed a short time since to advance
me money on my bond.”

“A short time since. Well, I was. But a short time
after makes a great difference. At two o'clock a man is rich—
at three a bankrupt. Your uncle marries. His wife will
become his heir in the will she will cause him to sign. Your
bond would be worthless.”

“Nevertheless, Abraham, you will acknowledge your prescience
was at fault. You might have been a loser by the
operation.”

“I acknowledge no such thing.”

“You do not?”

“No. I would have forbidden the bans.”

“And what good would that have done?”

“I mean that the wedding would not have taken place,
unless it was a match decreed by the Jesuits. I rarely fail in
my calculations. There would have been abundant means of
preventing the marriage.”

“I wish you had done so.”

“It is too late, now. It might have been better for us
both, if you had borrowed money on your bond. I would

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have been a gainer, and would have been abused—by the
Christians. But why should not you and I enjoy your uncle's
treasure as well as Gusset? Ha, ha, ha! The Jew has as
much right to pick up gold as another person. And in this
instance he would have served the rightful heir. But no more.
That account is closed.”

“And mine was never opened,” said Pollen.

“The time had not yet arrived,” said the Jew, with a most
conciliating smile.

“It had, though!” said the poet. “You declined to
treat for my poem. Since then, it has realized me some—
some—”

“Four hundred and twenty-five dollars,” said the Jew.

“How the d—l did you know?” asked Pollen, quickly,
for the computation was just.

“No matter. It is my business to know. I will not explain
the means. To me the manuscript would have been
worthless. Hence you see the importance of placing your
productions in the proper hands. Every thing depends upon
the disposition and influence of the party you deal with.
Now, we may negotiate if you are so disposed.”

“Since you know every thing, my merits, my possessions
and expectations, please name the utmost sum I may command,
the terms to be dictated by yourself.”

“I have calculated it. Ten thousand dollars.”

“You take my breath!”

“Do you take the money,” said Walter.

“Out of your pocket?” asked the Jew.

My pocket?” said Walter, involuntarily thrusting his
hand in it. Oh, yes. He is quite welcome to all he can find
there.”

“Your terms?” demanded Pollen.

“Two bonds. One for fifteen thousand dollars, due at the
expiration of twelve months—”

“Without interest?”

“With interest from date—the legal interest, six per
cent.”

“Merciful Jew!”

“No. Mercy, friendship, gratitude, are idle terms in matters
of business. The merchants denounce us for charging
four per cent. a month for our money, when they design to
realize eight per cent on it, and sometimes succeed.”

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“How is that?” asked Walter.

“Why, with fifty thousand dollars, they sell to the amount
of half-a-million. If they get ten per cent. profit on their
sales, they receive eight per cent. per month on the capital invested.
And yet they curse us, call us usurers, and pass
laws to prevent us, if possible, but which is not possible, from
reaping more than six per cent. on our investments!”

“With the ten thousand, then, I might make twenty, and
could afford to pay the bonus of five. I think I shall embrace
the offer,” said the poet.

“But the other bond,” said the Jew.

“I forgot that. What is it like? Not a pound of flesh, I
hope, Jew?”

“No—but the whole heart. You must bind yourself to
marry your young friend's aunt within five days, and you shall
have my check payable the day after.”

“I'd see you — first! I would rather marry the pretty
girl you keep to admit customers taken in by you.”

“I have no more to say,” replied the Jew, flushed with
anger. “But I warn you not to attempt to hold any conversation
with that girl! You can have no business with her.
Good night, gentlemen.”

The young men, thus summarily dismissed, revenged
themselves by exchanging significant glances with the girl who
unbarred the door for them, and who did not seem to be offended
at the liberty they had taken.

Walter, who was impatient for the solution of the mystery
in which he was so unconsciously involved, prevailed on the
poet to return to the Winkle mansion.

“I thought you would soon return,” said the pleased old
lady, when they entered the brilliantly illuminated parlor.
“One felt an irresistible curiosity to know my secret; and the
other always finds my poor house sufficiently attractive.”

“Oh, yes,” said Pollen, “a home fit for a prince; but I
am merely a poet.”

“But nevertheless as welcome as a prince,” said Wilsome,
with a most gracious smile.

“Now, aunt!” said Walter.

“Wait till one of the Points comes in. I have sent for
Clara—the mischievous one.”

“The Points!” exclaimed Walter, recollecting the adventure
of the night when he entered the Professor's house by

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mistake. “Pray don't send for her, aunt,” said Walter. “I
have special reasons for it.”

“And I have stronger ones for doing what I wish. She will
make a fourth at whist. Pooh! you don't know her. She
won't recognize you—she did not know Mr. Pollen. You will
find her a pretty, piquant, delightful little creature; and if
Virginia should discard you, she will serve for your next love.
On such conditions you may have access here, and seats at my
table. Here she is!” And sure enough the lively and handsome
Clara glided into the room, and Walter was introduced
to her. When bowing, and lifting her eyes, she affected to
start, as if surprised.

“Don't be alarmed,” said Miss Wilsome, “he is no burglar.”

“Burglar, aunt!”

“Yes, burglar. Oh, you don't know how heartily we have
laughed at that odd mistake of yours!”

“All's known, then!” said Walter. “I begged your father
not to divulge it,” he continued, addressing Clara, who
had taken possession of a seat at his elbow.

“He did not intend to divulge it. But he talks in his
sleep, and my mother, woman-like, you know, could not rest
until she had possession of his secret.”

“And you, may I not venture to say, could not rest until
you obtained it from her?”

“You may venture to say so! And had I no right to
know who it was that had invaded my chamber?”

“True. But I hope you have forgiven me.”

“I suppose so. But you must be careful how you commit
such mistakes. I should like to know who squeezed my
hand.”

“It was not me? Probably George—”

“Who? I would like to know.”

“I must not tell.”

“It was George Parke, since both Walter and Harold
have denied it,” said Wilsome.

“You ought not to expose George, my good aunt,” said
Walter.

“After exposing himself in a lady's bed-chamber, he need
not fear any exposure of mine. It is all explained, now; and
so we will have our game. Rose, bring the cards.”

“Iss, mem,” said Rose, obeying promptly.

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“There is something else, aunt, you were to elucidate,”
said Walter, reverting to the displeasure of Virginia.

“The letter—I forgot the letter. It was found in the
flour barrel.”

“Found in the flour barrel!” exclaimed Walter.

“Found in the flour barrel!” repeated Clara, in a mock
solemnity of tone.

“A floury epistle,” said Pollen.

“No one read it, however,” said Clara. “We agreed
among ourselves that its contents should be sacred. We
merely looked at the signature, so that we could return it to
the writer.”

“That was wrong,” said Walter; “it should have been returned
to me, the owner.”

“I know it, and I said so, but—”

I determined it should be delivered to Virginia. Blame
me, Walter,” said his aunt. “I did it for my amusement,
but under a promise that all should be satisfactorily explained.
I knew Virginia could be easily appeased. Sit still, sir; never
mind your hat.”

Your letter did not fare so well,” continued Clara, addressing
Pollen.

“Mine? I am not aware of having lost any.”

“It was no great loss, I fancy. But it is certain that
when you threw your hat on my bed, a letter fell out of it.”

“Indeed! Let me remember. I believe I did receive a
note that day from my—tailor! I hope you sent it back to
the writer. I shall not be offended.”

“Here it is,” said Clara, who had slyly received it from
Miss Wilsome.

“Paid! Receipted! My dear Miss, you may have all my
letters!” said Pollen, who knew perfectly well who had paid
the bill.

“Agreed,” said Clara. “But I cannot consent to receive
them in the same manner, and at the same time and place.”

“My dear aunt,” said Walter, rising, “do permit me to
run down to Dr. Nitre's—”

“Are you unwell?” asked Clara.

“Pooh, child, she won't die before morning,” replied his
aunt, shuffling the cards. “And I'm sure she's in bed by this
time, and perhaps asleep, and dreaming of you. The habit is
fixed upon her—the abominable habit of retiring early, and

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early rising, which she got from her father. He is out every
morning before the sun is up, cruelly destroying the woodcock,
or killing the trout, which he finds in a small brook—a fish,
Mr. Pollen, not much longer than your finger.”

“And what is your hour, aunt, for retiring?”

“None in particular—but always after midnight. And I
rise in the same way, any time after nine. Bring your mate.
I am paired.”

They played until the game palled on their hands, for the
victory, if it could be termed a victory when there was no contest,
was invariably on the side of Wilsome and the poet.

“You must be deeply in love, Walter,” said his aunt. “I
never knew you to play so badly. It must be an affection of
the heart which has obtused your head.”

“It would follow, then,” said Pollen, “that where the intellect
is clear, there is no affection of the heart.”

Wilsome threw a glance of surprise at the poet, and felt
that her shaft had rebounded.

“Let him defend himself,” said she.

“No. I yield,” said Walter.

“Then take the captive with you,” said his aunt, to Clara,
who was departing.

“I will,” was the response, “but I will not admit him
within the door.”

“Oh, he finds access without your permission,” said Pollen,
bowing, and withdrawing.

The next morning Walter hastened to the mansion of
Doctor Nitre, and met the doctor himself on the marble steps.

“I am glad to meet you here, my young friend,” said the
doctor, “and was, indeed, just going to your aunt's to see you.
I have learned the cause of Virginia's umbrage—indeed I
knew it yesterday, for it was confided to me by Professor Point—
and I should have informed you of it, but I knew there was
no danger of a serious estrangement, and—”

“I knew all about it, doctor,” said Walter, impatient to
enter. “If your conscience acquits you, for prolonging Virginia's
pain, I am sure I do ”

“But you have had your revenge, sir! I have been punished.
Your abrupt departure last evening was attributed by
Mrs. Nitre, to some misconduct of mine; I believe it was for
leaving you to visit some poor languishing patient; and I assure
you, in the strictest confidence, that I endured the

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severest curtain lecture last night I ever listened to in all
my life.”

“I am sorry to hear it, doctor.”

“And I am glad to find a sympathizer. Mrs. Nitre has
been in an ill humor ever since. But the clouds will blow
away, and the sun shine forth again, when she sees you. Good-bye—
and good luck to you.”

Walter rang and was admitted. But before the servant
had an opportunity to announce his name to Mrs. Nitre, he
espied Virginia gliding into the parlor, and immediately joined
her. She still wore a serious aspect, and there were visible
traces of recent discomposure.

But when the lover made a full confession of his night's
frolic; of the encounter with the poet; the Jew's interview
with the fortune hunters; the death of the monkey, and the
adventure in the professor's house, the gloom vanished from
the young lady's brow, and was succeeded by hearty and
hilarious laughter.

“In the name of wonder what is the matter with the
girl!” exclaimed Mrs. Nitre, running in. Virginia was
speechless from her cachinatory convulsions.

“Only diverted at a little confession I have been making,”
said Walter.

“Oh, you are here, my dear friend! The stupid servant!
I will discharge her! Not to inform me you had called.
And—bless me! I am in dishabille!” she added, glancing at
her morning wrapper and quickly vanishing. Before she
returned, Walter had made his peace with Virginia, and departed.

When he appeared again before his aunt, she could not
avoid observing the change in his spirits and appearance; and
she listened with satisfaction to his narration of the proceedings
at his uncle's mansion after the dispersion of the wedding
guests. Being greatly diverted at the annoyance of Gusset,
on whom, when her name was mentioned, she never failed to
bestow a broadside of opprobrious epithets, she approved the
conduct of Walter, and desired him to say to Sergeant Blore,
that whenever he visited the city, her house would be open for
his reception, and might be freely considered as his headquarters.
But she condemned Walter for riding in the coach
with the “impudent hussy,” and intimated that if he had
quarrelled with her outright she might have become reconciled

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to him, and indeed might have deferred her own wedding to
some distant period.

“When is it to take place, aunt?” he asked.

“I have not fixed the day—but soon.”

“Is he impatient?”

“He? He don't know any thing about it yet!” was the
prompt reply.

“That is most extraordinary,” said Walter. “I always
thought it required two to make a match, unless, indeed, one
may substitute a dummy.”

“None of your nonsense. A dummy husband might be
very convenient, though, under certain circumstances! But
mine shall be a man of genius; one looked up to by the world
with admiration; one who can reply to the impertinences of
frivolous tongues, in Greek; one who, when lifted above the
fangs of poverty, and the sneers of tradespeople, will be universally
respected; and who will have justice done him by
the press of the country, when it is known he is independent
of their aid in the procurement of a subsistence. Surely I,
who can accomplish all these things for him, have the right to
name the day and condition, and he must have too much discernment
to throw any obstacles in the way.”

“I suppose so, aunt; but I don't know. I have heard it
said that Pollen once lost a fortune by refusing to yield to the
caprices of a woman.”

“He did—he told me so himself. But has he not suffered
for his folly? Would he be likely to repeat such an
indiscretion, with all his experience of the evils of abject
destitution; I don't fear it. But come—let us go to the dentist.”

They drove to the gorgeously upholstered shop of the
tooth-filer, and were ushered into a saloon hung round with
second-hand mirrors bought at Moses's haberdashery, and
were invited to recline on the red cushions of the sofas.

“I shall do no such thing,” said Wilsome to the maid.
“I am never kept waiting any where. Tell Mr. Enamel that
Miss Wilsome Winkle desires to have his attention immediately.”

“Mr. Enamel, miss,” said the fine servant maid, “is in
New York, and will not return before evening. But Mr. Foil,
his friend from New York, and the fashionable dentist of that
city, is here to-day to operate for him.”

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“He don't operate on me! Mr. Foil, indeed! No. My
mouth is not open to every body! Tell Mr. Enamel, when
he returns, to bring his instruments to my house, and perform
the operation there. If he fails, I shall look for a more grateful
dentist. I first saw this Enamel,” she continued to Walter,
as they returned home, “several years ago, in church, when
all the wealth he possessed was a fine suit of clothes, and a
handsome face. The congregation was large and rich, which
of course was the reason he joined them, and I aided him in
extending his acquaintance. The minister recommended him
to me, and I believe his large family to this day pay nothing
for the dentist's services; and so Enamel's business increased
most wonderfully. He has made a fortune, however, and is
less accommodating than he used to be. But he shall accommodate
me.”

“Aunt,” said Walter, “do you suppose there was any
agreement between the minister and the dentist?”

“Perhaps none specified. But like another class, so much
abused, there are some clergymen the merest deadheads, who
make merchandise of religion. While denouncing the mercenary
spirit of the age, their own edifices, which they call
churches, are the marts for the sale of all sorts of wares,
and you never fail to hear the rattle of money in them. It
would almost seem as if they bartered salvation for silver,
and begged in the name of the Lord.”

“And that might be construed as taking the name of the
Lord in vain—”

“True, Walter. For sometimes, I doubt not, they beg
in vain. If Enamel disappoints me, to-morrow we will go to
New York.”

“To New York, aunt?”

“Certainly. Do not people go there every day? There
is nothing wonderful in it. Yes, I will go there, and be operated
on by some one who shall not learn my name, and where
I dwell. I have my reasons for it.”

“Then I should not be able to return to Babbleton today.”

“Of course not.”

“And if Enamel comes, I shall not be permitted to spend
the evening at Dr. Nitre's.”

“No. You are subject to my orders. But if you desire
it, Virginia and Julia shall both come to my house.”

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“I do desire it, aunt.”

Virginia and Julia were sent for immediately, and they
dined at the Winkle mansion. In the evening a splendid
equipage drove up to the door, and Dr. Enamel descended,
and was conducted to the chamber which had been prepared
for him, and where he was soon after joined by Miss Wilsome
and Walter.

Here Walter learned, for the first time, that his aunt's
beautiful teeth he had been accustomed to admire, were all
false, and that the roots of the one to be extracted, were the
last remains of nature's handiwork. When her teeth were removed,
Miss Wilsome's lips fell in, and her voice was sepulchral.

“If it gives you too much pain,” said Enamel, when preparing
to incise the gum, “you had better take a little ether.
I have brought a bottle for that purpose.”

“Throw it out of the window!” said the old lady, now
looking very old indeed. “I will have none of it. I shall
never place myself in a condition to have my throat cut, and
be a mere silent spectator, without the ability to resist. True,
Walter is here, and would revenge me. Still, I won't relinquish
my own powers of resistance. Do your work as quickly
as possible—I will bear the pain.”

She bore it like a heroine. She did not even wince under
the infliction. But the root adhered so tenaciously to its
socket, that all the strength of Enamel was exerted to extract
it. And in the struggle, he placed one of his hands on the
head of his patient, and by an unlucky movement, the whole
mass of dark glistening hair, which had often elicited the admiration
of Walter, slipped aside and fell to the floor, leaving
his aunt's head as bald, and almost as smooth and white as an
egg.

“Give me my hair!” she cried, starting up, and ejecting
the blood which followed the extraction of the root of the
tooth.

“How is this?” demanded Walter, rising, and assuming a
menacing attitude, for at first he supposed the dentist had by
some process or other deprived his aunt of her natural adornment.

“It is only her wig,” whispered Enamel. “She has been
bald fifteen years.”

“Wilsome replaced the hair, adjusting it before a mirror

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speechless with indignation, for Pollen had passed by the door,
which had been neglectfully left open. Then she replaced
her teeth, without uttering a word.

“I am sorry the accident happened,” said Enamel.

“You should have remembered that it happened once
before,” replied Wilsome, after a long silence. “It is not
pleasant to be exposed thus, in the presence of witnesses.
True, one is my nephew—but he knew nothing about it. And
Pollen must be passing, just at that moment!”

“He was in a revery, aunt,” said Walter, “and incapable
of observing external objects.”

“I hope so,” said she. “That is all, sir,” she continued
to Enamel. “To-morrow send me your bill, and I will sign
a check. You know I will not permit my name to go on a
dentist's books.”

Enamel bowed and withdrew, and the next minute his
coach was heard rolling away.

As Walter and his aunt proceeded towards the parlor,
where the young ladies were engaged in some boisterous entertainment,
many solemn injunctions of inviolable secrecy were
imposed. The old lady declared, in the event of his betraying
her, the estrangement which she had already decreed, would
be changed to bitter enmity, without the benefit of truce, or
an interlude of special friendly meeting, during the remainder
of their lives.

When they appeared in the parlor, it was ascertained that
the poet had truly fallen into one of his fits of abstraction, and
wandered away in the street, muttering incoherently, something
upon the subject of impartial criticism. Wilsome seemed
annoyed. But Walter and Virginia realized a happy unconsciousness
of the vexations to which mortality is liable.

CHAPTER XVI. FLIGHT OF LUCY FROM HER LOVERS—JOHN DOWLY'S VISIT TO THE WIDOW-BLORE'S LETTER.

At the village Roland attempted in vain to obtain an interview
with Lucy. Repeatedly the effort was made; and when

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he withdrew the last time, defeated and chagrined, and with
malignant impulses struggling in his breast, he was met by
Lowe—his despised rival—who was approaching the mansion.
Lowe, always pale, but never more self-possessed, diminished
his pace, and looking his enemy steadily in the eye, smiled
derisively. Roland, disconcerted, and trembling with fear,
cast down his eyes and strode past without uttering a word.

Lowe was admitted, and a few moments after Lucy appeared
before him, and occupied a seat at his side. And she
began the conversation.

“Mr. Lowe,” said she, “I chanced to see your meeting
with Roland in the street. You seemed prepared for a rencontre.
There was defiance on your lip, and vengeance in
your heart.”

“He is a coward—therefore I cannot attack him.”

“He is dangerous, though cowardly, as you say. I would
not, for the world, have any blood spilled on my account.
Will you, for my sake, forbear?”

“Certainly. I never could desire to do him injury, except
in my own defence, or yours.”

“I shall withdraw from a place where it is necessary to
have a defender. Will you promise, during my absence, not
to come in hostile collision with Roland?”

“Most willingly, especially if the desire is at all prompted
by a motive to save me from the effects of his evil machinations.”

“I would save you from his vengeance, which is not often
balked in the victimization of its object. I would save him,
too, from the consequences of your enmity. And I would save
myself from the heart-rending reflection, that I had been the
innocent cause of strife, and wounds, and perhaps death. Oh,
promise me that you will not have any conflict with him!”

“I do promise, Lucy, as I said, unless it be unavoidable.”

“It may be avoided, sir, if you will it—for you know the
truth of the old proverb, where ever there is a will there is a
way.”

“I fear the proverb is not true. I have the will, for instance,
to make you mine, now and for ever. I see you tremble.
Fear not—I will not importune you further, until it is
fairly ascertained if there be no other way to remove the impediment.
But I have a most vehement will to know the

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place you have selected for your seclusion. Now, where is
the way?”

“You jest with me,” said Lucy, smiling; “and in truth
I am glad to see your spirits reviving; for I had learned you
were in a melancholy mood.”

“In your presence, dear Lucy, my gloom and despondency
vanish, like vapors before the sun.”

“If you deem such fine flattering speeches the way, you
are mistaken.”

“I did not—I did not. It was uttered involuntarily, and
for my own gratification. It is an enjoyment, Lucy, for me
to utter the truthful sentiments of my heart in your presence.
But the way—why may I not learn the way?”

“For the reason I alleged. The decree cannot be recalled,
until there may be no longer any reason for its enforcement.
Still there may be a way, if there be a will—that is, if the
will be true and faithful, and constant—”

“Until when?”

“I cannot tell. I know not. You know what we would
learn, but will not tell. Let that suffice.”

“It must, perforce. We are interrupted.”

Biddy Boggle, who had admitted some one into the hall,
stood at the door of the parlor.

“Who is it, Biddy?” asked Lucy.

“Dill Bizzle,” said she.

“What does he want?”

“He says—no—I beg pardon—I meant to say Bill—Bizzle—
this time. He says there's a female woman—he said it
mam—has a letter for you, from your aunt.”

“Show her into the other room, Biddy, and bring me the
letter,” said Lucy, in some trepidation, for she believed the
messenger came from her aunt in New York. And so it
proved; and a bright flush spread over her face, when she
glanced at the well-known peculiarity of her aunt's caligraphy.

“I will call again, if permitted, this evening,” said Lowe,
rising. “May I do so?”

“Certainly,” said Lucy, half unconsciously, and she proceeded
to tear open the envelope as Lowe retired.

While Lucy was perusing the letter, the bearer of it, Miss
Edith McCrabbed, a thin, pale, hoop-nosed old maid, was conducted
into the sitting-room, where she was recognized, by the

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widow, as the only domestic, or rather companion, of her sister
Flora. She was greeted in a familiar and friendly manner,
but she declined taking the seat tendered her, or removing
her bonnet.

“Surely you do not intend to return to-day?” said Mrs.
Winkle.

“Surely I do!” said Miss McCrabbed; “and the conductor
said the train for New York would be here in fifteen
minutes.”

“Why, did you not say you came for Lucy?”

“Yes, mawdam, and I hope she'll be ready.”

“To-day?”

“Yes, mawdam. The letter explains it all.”

Just then Lucy came in with the letter. She hastened to
bestow some friendly salutations on Miss McCrabbed, and then
placing the letter in the hands of her mother, exclaimed: “I
will be ready! I am rejoiced it is so. Do not object, mother.
We will avoid the many unpleasant anticipations that would
otherwise afflict us before parting. Read it, dear mother,
while I prepare my trunk. Biddy, tell Bill Dizzle to stay a
few minutes. Say I shall want him to carry Miss McCrabbed's
trunk to the depot.”

Lucy disappeared before her mother could reply. The
letter ran thus:—

My Dear Niece:—I send my Edith for you, and I desire
that you will return with her, by the evening mail. She
is discreet, and no one knows her in Babbleton. By accompanying
her, your persecutor will not be able to trace you to
your asylum. Wear a thick veil, so that he may not recognize
your features when you go to the cars. You may safely
confide in Edith. She has been my confidant for many years,
as your mother knows. She was personally acquainted with
the Great Unknown—Sir Walter—and is familiar with the
plots and stratagems of villains. She reads for me every
night, and has a romantic and literary disposition. Since I
received your dear pathetic letter, I have been going over the
`Children of the Abbey' again, and find my eyes continually
suffused with the miseries of poor Amanda. My dear child!
You remind me of her so much, that I am painfully impatient
to clasp you to my heart! Do not delay a moment. My

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love to sister Edith. Tell her not to insist on my Edith having
any refreshments, for she never takes any.

“Your own aunt,
Flora Blount. “P. S.—Do not forget your purse, or any jewels of value.
You know I am very poor, and we never know what vicissitudes
may be in reserve for us.
Flora.

Bill Dizzle glided through the hall with a trunk on his
shoulder, as the first whistle of the approaching train was
heard; and the next moment Lucy ran in and threw her arms
around her mother's neck. “Farewell, dear mother!” cried
she. “It is best to go thus—to part now—but we will write
daily—and if I do not return soon, you can come to me. I
will induce my aunt to make every thing convenient for the
visit. Never fear! I never yet strove in vain to please. I
will convince her that she is not poor—for I believe she is
rich—and are you not her only sister? Farewell, dear, dear
mother!”

A moment after, being released from her mother's embrace,
Lucy was crossing the street with Edith McCrabbed, and when
the train paused, the two were just at the steps, and ascended
into the car without being recognized, or attracting the slightest
notice from the crowd that stood in the vicinity.

When comfortably seated, and just as the cars were starting
away, Lucy beheld Roland gazing at some ladies sitting a few
feet in front of her. She turned her head quickly away, and
trembled lest she might be discovered. But as the train
moved off, she became satisfied she had escaped his observation,
and once more breathed freely.

Mrs. Winkle laughed and wept alternately. The letter
from her sister, the Scotch messenger, the trunk hurried away
on Dizzle's shoulder, and Lucy's promptitude of action, were
irresistible sources of amusement. But then the reality, the
sad reality, that Lucy was gone, and that she was left alone
for an indefinite period, with perhaps an enemy awaiting a
favorable opportunity to aim a blow at the small remnant of
her fortune; and with many malicious persons around, ever
ready to rejoice at her calamity, produced, at every ebb of her
spirits, a flood of tears.

It was while her spirits were thus ebbing and flowing, that

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Lowe again entered, anticipating the hour appointed for his
return; for he had learned from Bill Dizzle that Lucy had departed,
but in what direction Bill was unable to say, for he
had been called away from the depot after putting down the
trunk, and there were no less than three trains with passengers
to leave in the next few minutes for as many different places.

“Is it true,” cried Lowe, “that Lucy has left us?”

“True, indeed. You men would not let her rest, and so
she resolved to escape.”

“But she appointed an hour for me to come hither this
very evening.”

“Then come. Or rather stay. I hope she did not promise
to be here herself?”

“I understood her so.”

“You must have misunderstood her; she never deceives.
But she has a spice of humor, and knew the house would be
open to receive you. Laugh at it, Mr. Lowe, and confess that
the men do not possess all the spirit vouchsafed poor humanity.
I have laughed until tears came to my relief.”

“But is it prudent, Mrs. Winkle, to permit Lucy to depart
unattended, and perhaps to remain for days or weeks, where
no one interested in her welfare will watch over her, and be
ready to defend her from insult, if any should be offered? You
know she is irresistibly lovely.”

“I know the gentlemen are in the habit of saying so. But
be not uneasy. Her safety will be guarded by others, and I
have confidence in her own sense of duty and strength of purpose.
Why, did she not fly the danger here? I assure you
her departure was a suggestion of her own. I have no fears
for Lucy.”

“And you will not tell me where she has gone?”

“No. She did not authorize me to do so.”

“Very well. I am then at liberty to find out, if I can.
Permit me to take my leave. In half an hour I must be seated
in the down train.”

As Lowe said this, he looked to find some indication in
Mrs. Winkle's features of the truth of his conjecture. He had
heard Dizzle say the letter was from Lucy's aunt, and although
he was aware that Miss Wilsome had decreed the banishment
of the widow's family, yet he had never heard of the existence
of another aunt. Therefore he hastened to the cars when they

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paused at the depot, and set off for Philadelphia in pursuit
of Lucy.

Roland saw him depart from his room at the inn, a chamber
which he often occupied expressly for the purpose of gazing at
the ladies. When the train was in motion, he started up, and
resolved to make another attempt to see Lucy, and even propose
to marry her in church, if no other mode remained to
make her his, and thus snatch her from his hated rival.

“Mrs. Winkle,” said he, when admitted, “I am come in a
fit of desperation.”

“Oh Lud!” said she, “I hope there is no danger of being
killed by you!”

“You misunderstand me. I am come once more to beg an
interview with Lucy. And I am prepared to say that I will
wed her in open day, and in the church. My heart, my hand,
my fortune are all laid at her feet.”

“Generous sir! You are too liberal! I will not inquire
what boon it was you have hitherto been willing to bestow
upon my poor child. Suffice it that your all is tendered at
last.”

“You seem to mock me. Will you procure me an interview?”

“How can I?”

“Command her to appear in your presence. She will obey.”

“She cannot.”

“Cannot?”

“She is not here. She is gone.”

“Gone? Where?”

“That I cannot tell.”

“Cannot tell!” exclaimed Roland furiously, and rising. “I
can! She has eloped, and I know with whom! Madam, you
could not have consented to it. If so, where was the necessity?
I saw her seducer depart in the cars for Philadelphia. Good
day, madam. I will pursue them! I have agents in the city,
madam, who will soon find them, and Lucy shall be restored.
Good day, madam! I will spend ten thousand dollars rather
than that vagabond shall have her. The vagabond is your
handsome pale-faced Lowe, madam—a villain, madam!”

Fortunately Roland did not look behind when rushing out,
else he would have beheld the merry widow dangerously agitated
with excessive laughter. The idea that Lucy's admirers

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were pursuing in one direction, when she was flying in another
and an opposite one, was irresistibly diverting.

Roland stamped in front of the inn with his watch in his
hand, resolved if the next down train should be a minute behind
its time, to make those who were to blame suffer for it.
He was a large stockholder. But this time, as if all the
doomed victims of his ill-nature were to elude his grasp, the
train arrived a minute before the time, and there was yet no
opportunity to vent his accumulated wrath. He sprang in,
and was soon rattled into the city.

Meantime, as the shades of evening fell upon the peaceful
village, and the mocking-bird began his song with the rising
of the moon, unconscious that she who had never failed to acknowledge
the tuneful salutation was away, an old-fashioned
spring-shaft gig stopped in front of the inn, and an old-fashioned
gentleman, in an old-fashioned coat and hat, descended
to the ground. After giving the reins to the ostler,
and charging him particularly to take good care of his ancient
horse, the old gentleman turned away and proceeded deliberately
to the widow's mansion.

“I am very, very glad to see you, Mr. Dowly!” exclaimed
Mrs. Winkle, when the old gentleman was ushered into her
presence. “You could not have selected a better time to
accept my invitation to tea,” she continued, shaking his hand
heartily, “for I am quite alone and require the company of a
true friend.”

“My Maker knows I am your true friend. I will laugh
with you, or weep with you, and even die—”

“With me, or for me?” asked the widow.

“Upon my word I don't know which would be the most
proper. They are the words I should have spoken when young—
but I was stupid—yet honest and true—yes, true and honest,
Edith.”

“I am sure of it. And if you had spoken your sentiments
boldly, I do not know— but all that is past, buried
a quarter of a century ago. Sit opposite. Bring in the tea,
Biddy. Let me make it. How has it happened, Mr. Dowly,
that of all the evenings in the world, you should have selected
this, when I most desired a social companion, to pay me the
often-deferred visit?”

“I knew you were alone.”

“You did? How did you learn that?”

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“Every body knows it. It is already the talk of the town
and the country. I heard them speaking of it in the bar-room.”

“Of what?”

“Of the poor child's elopement. But I first learned it of
Dizzle, who came to my house.”

“Lucy's elopement!”

“Yes. But be comforted. Roland is a bad man—”

“Do they say she ran away with him?”

“No, no. But he told every one he met, that she had run
away with Lowe, the vagabond, as he called him; and declared
he would bring her back, and have her lover locked up in prison.
Then I ventured to come hither, hoping I might be able
to afford you some little consolation; and to repeat the Christian
precepts, which alone can impart comfort in trouble.
But you are not cast down—”

“No! Ha, ha, ha! What a world! Oh, how happy
the Arums and Crudles, and Snobsons must be! How they
exult, and pity the disgraced, poverty-stricken Winkles! And
why should not I laugh too? Oh, that they could see me!
I've spilt my tea. More hot water, Biddy.”

“Do not be so much disturbed, my dear madam,” said
Dowly, looking in alarm upon the spasmodic symptoms of
the widow.

“Disturbed, Mr. Dowly? I beg, I earnestly entreat you
will believe me, when I say, that whilst the envious gossips are
exulting, or supposing they are exulting over my calamity, I
enjoy some of the happiest moments of my life, and would
fain have them witness my felicity.”

“Felicity, Mrs. Winkle?”

“That may be rather too strong a word; but I don't know
another that would answer better. Mr. Dowly, Lucy has not
eloped with any one!”

“I thank my Maker! Oh, I thank my blessed Maker for
it! Laugh on. I will laugh with you—for I do love that
dear child as much as her parent can, and I hope you will permit
me to say so.”

“And it was when you supposed me overwhelmed with
mortification and irremediable distress—abandoned and dishonored
by my own child, and reviled and scoffed at by my
neighbors—that you came to comfort me, to say that you were
still my friend—that you loved my dear departed daughter;

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to offer consolation—to—Oh, Mr. Dowly, let my tears have
free vent. May God bless you!”

“Do not weep, dear lady! If it had been really as they
suppose, and as some of them might have had the wickedness
to desire, still, believe me, John Dowly would have never
forsaken the Edith that once and always so completely possessed
his heart.”

“They are not the tears of weeping, Mr. Dowly. They
proceed from joy—joy, that there exists one pure and noble
being in the world, and that being my friend If it were not
utterly too late in the afternoon of our lives, this hand of
mine should be yours, as the only recompense I could offer.”

“I am happy! To hear you say so, is worth more than
worlds to me! My dreams are realized. In them I have
heard you utter similar words, and they are like the memories
of blessed youth. All I ask is that I may not be considered
bold and intrusive in my eager friendship, and in the tender
of my services. Only permit me to think of the past, to
dream on, and talk of the sunny days when we were young
together, and I shall desire no more exquisite happiness in
this life. Permit this, and whatever I possess is yours and
your children's to command.”

“Thank you, thank you, Mr. Dowly. Any little, or great
incident of the past that you can remember, or feeling, or
word, or scene, that may be recalled, you may refer to without
hesitation. It will be a pleasure to me. Although I certainly
loved my husband dearly, yet John Dowly was always near
my heart, and its portals were never closed against him. I
always loved him to the full extent that duty permitted; and
my estimate of his character was not erroneous. I have no
doubt that what your good heart prompts, your hand would
execute to the utmost, if your means were only equal to your
will.”

“My means—you, too, suppose I am poor. Every body
thinks so but Abraham Laban, and he would not tell any
thing to the contrary, for fear it might interfere with some of
his contemplated operations.”

“I am sure I shall be rejoiced to learn it is not so,” said
Mrs. Winkle.

“I have my poor old house, and my few barren acres. I
raise no great crops, and contrive to pay my taxes. That's
all the people know,” continued the old man smiling, and his

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lustrous dark eyes evincing the satisfaction he felt. “And I
wear an old-fashioned coat and hat, which attract the attention
of the people on the boat, for I often see them gazing at me.”

“I'm sure they look very genteel, Mr. Dowly,” said the
widow.

“They are without lint or stain. I take great care of
them. And why do you suppose I take such great care of
these old things? I'll tell you. They remind me of the
past, and they make the years roll by imperceptibly. They
keep fresh in my memory the associations I like to dwell upon.
My old brown coat once sported in its button-hole a beautiful
flower dropped from your fair hand—I have it still in my old
Bible!”

“I don't remember it,” said Mrs. Winkle, smiling.

“But I do. It was at a gay party at General C—'s.
You sat upon the balcony in the moonlight, and Winkle was
with you. You uttered a lament for the loss of the flower. I
was below, and seized it, and hid it in my bosom.”

“Why, Mr. Dowly, now I do remember it. It fell just
when Mr. Winkle was proposing—”

“I thought so at the time. But that made no difference.
I resolved to preserve the beautiful blossom, not for any superior
sweetness of its own, but for the sake of the hand which
had clasped, and in memory of the lips that had pressed it.
Thus old objects remind me of the happy past, when the world
to my youthful eyes was illuminated with a heavenly brightness.
And believe me, that no thought of censure crossed
my mind—nor any inclination to blame you for preferring another,
ever arose in my breast!”

“I am sure of it.”

“Yes, you may be sure of it. Although you were another's
in reality, in my dreams you were mine; and as I slept
one half my time, I am indebted to you for all the happiness
I have enjoyed.”

“Mercy on me, Mr. Dowly! I was not aware of all that!”

“And the old objects I have preserved remind me of those
blissful years with which they were associated. But the
people think I am poor, and unable to procure other clothing!
Edith, when we were young, I had sufficient fortune to aspire,
if my heart had not been faint, even to your hand. Upon
your marriage, I retired from business and lived in seclusion,

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where I now dwell. And if I have not spent any thing since
that day, what do you think has become of my fortune?”

“I am sure I hope you have it still.”

“I have. But it has grown larger as I have grown older.
I have had nothing to do but to watch the securities I held,
collect the interest and compound it. And why have I done
so? I am without kindred. But there are those I love, and
they will need it. They shall have it!”

“You become enthusiastic, Mr. Dowly. Can it be possible
you mean me—my family?”

“Who else? Have I loved any others? Have others
treated the supposed poor old John Dowly with respect?
No! The ability to bestow it on you, and when, too, circumstances
have made it acceptable, is my chief delight in
this world. I would have aided your honorable husband, if
he had applied to me; but I had not the presumption to tender
him any assistance. He must have known I had fortune.
But no matter; I have waited for an opportunity, and have
not waited in vain. When Roland became possessed of the
mortgage on this property, I knew his object, and resolved to
defeat him. He thinks me poor—and he must not be undeceived.
He is a bad man, and I desire to have no strife with
him. He knows I rescued Lucy from his grasp, but he thinks
I have not been informed of his design. But Lucy! We
have forgotten her. Bless my life! I never was so beguiled
before! It has been my intention at every pause to ask where
the dear child has gone. I know why she sought another
asylum, and would fain learn the place of her abode, if it be
not improper to desire it.”

“Not at all. She is by this time with her aunt Flora.”

“Bless me! Is she living yet? and unmarried?”

“Living and unmarried. She never could find a mate
sufficiently heroical and romantic to captivate her heart. She
rejected many.”

“I know she did! She would have rejected me. After
you were wedded, I determined to seek her hand. She
seemed to suspect my intention, and took the first opportunity
to nip my hope in the bud. It was fortunate, for I could
never have loved her.”

“She has never loved any one but the heroes of her novels;
and those she will never cease to adore.”

“Does she read novels yet?”

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“Incessantly. And although residing in the most public
place in a great city, she lives in utter seclusion. Lucy could
not have found a better abode.”

“I'm glad to hear it. I'm glad it's so.”

“And just to think that both Lowe and Roland are
searching for her in Philadelphia! It is laughable.”

“It is so; and I shall laugh heartily at it. But Roland.
I have a nice little stratagem for him. You must consent to
it. He will be beaten at the election. Walter is to make a
speech against his party, and Lucy has rejected his addresses
with scorn. His thirst for vengeance will be uncontrollable,
and he will endeavor to distress you by foreclosing the mortgage.”

“And you will not permit us to be thrust into the
street?”

“I would be thrust into the river first, with a millstone
tied to my neck. When the money is demanded, merely say
you have it not—”

“But Dibble says I have enough in bank to pay the interest.”

“The interest—but he will demand the principal. Let
him proceed. The trifling costs will be of no moment. Let
him sell—”

“Mercy on me! Sell my house?”

“Yes—but you shall be the purchaser, no matter who
may bid against you. I will be near to sign a check for the
amount. Then the property will be yours and unincumbered,
and Roland's rage will consume him. The Arums and Crudles
will be the victims of chagrin. None will know whence
the money comes—but they might, if you used my check! I
will bring the money, and you shall have it in your purse.
They will be astonished, you relieved, and John Dowly the
happiest man in the world.”

“I am not sure that Walter would sanction the arrangement.
He is a little fastidious on such delicate points. But
you will then hold the mortgage?”

“Oh, yes; it will be surrendered to you, and you can deposit
it in my keeping.”

“I see no objections—”

“No—do not conjure up any, unless you desire to make
me miserable.”

At this stage of the conversation, Biddy appeared, and

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without being questioned by her mistress, announced “Dill
Bizzle.”

He was, as ever, promptly admitted, and said he bore a
letter from Sergeant Blore for Walter. The widow took possession
of it, and Bill retired immediately. The letter not
being sealed, Mrs. Winkle assumed the liberty of reading it.
It ran as follows:

“Dear Sir: Excuse my bad writing, for you know I write
with my left hand, and hold the paper down with my right
stump. I saw Col. Oakdale to-day, and he said you would be
home to-night, therefore I write.

“I want to see you as soon as convenient. The enemy
has begun operations, and violated the capitulations. My
garrison holds out yet, but we are in distress, and if not soon
relieved, we must surrender, expecting no quarter. The
enemy—”

“Pardon my interruption,” said Mr. Dowly, but do you
know what is meant by the enemy?”

“Oh, yes,” said the widow; “my brother's wife, the new
Mrs. Winkle. [Reading] The enemy has almost made your
uncle a prisoner in his own house. His cheeks are paler, and
his eyes bloodshotten. The intention is to make him abdicate.
I know it is. At the same time, the she-wolf pretends
to be so affectionate, that he cannot speak a harsh word to
her. But she fills all his time, and talks so much, that he
can say nothing. There is foul play in the wind, I know.
She has convinced him there is danger in war, and that he is
liable to be killed by the Bull. She wants him to make his
will—which I call an abdication; and if he abdicates in her
favor, she'll not care a grape-shot how soon he does die. Indeed,
she might help him off—like the infernal tigress Catharine
of Russia did her husband. So you see the danger is
very great. But I am not idle. Every time the red-haired
Scotch lawyer Bawson comes out of her closet, I lead him
into mine; and as he is a Scotchman, and as I offer two dollars
where she offers one, I may gain the victory, as Richelieu
used to do. He has agreed, if ordered by your uncle to draw
up a will, to insert your name. The she devil, like all women
who are tyrants, don't know a will from a deed, and is a perfect
fool in business transactions. But I pity the commander.

“Have you seen a lawyer for me about my own

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entanglement? Bawson says I have the advantage of her. She's
been married twice, and I only once. But I doubt it. She
was married to men, and I to a woman. It makes all the difference
in the world. No matter. If she declares war, I
must defend myself to the last extremity—and I won't pay
any indemnity. Reconnoitre the old catamount for me before
you leave town. Come to the garrison through the orchard.
The Bull keeps all the cattle yet.

“Your faithful old soldier,
Th. Blore.

This despatch afforded the old couple an ample topic for
the remainder of the evening; and when they rose from the
tea-table, it was striking eleven o'clock. The old gentleman,
after declaring the hours just spent were among the happiest
of his life, and receiving an assurance from the widow that her
lonely condition had been assuaged by his presence, departed
for the inn, and calling for his old horse, drove slowly homeward
by moonlight in a delightful revery.

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Jones, J. B. (John Beauchamp), 1810-1866 [1855], The Winkles, or, The merry monomaniacs. (D. Appleton and Company, New York) [word count] [eaf459T].
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