SCENE IV.
Come you hither to me, master tapster; what's your
name, master tapster?
Clown.
Pompey.
Escal.
What else?
Clown.
Bum, Sir.
Escal.
Troth, and your bum is the greatest thing
about you, so that, in the beastliest sense, you are
Pompey the Great. Pompey, you are partly a bawd,
Pompey; howsoever you colour it in being a tapster;
are you not? come tell me true, it shall be the better
for you.
-- 379 --
Clown.
Truly, Sir, I am a poor fellow that would
live.
Escal.
How would you live, Pompey? by being a
bawd? what do you think of the trade, Pompey? is it
a lawful trade?
Clown.
If the law will allow it, Sir.
Escal.
But the law will not allow it, Pompey; nor
it shall not be allowed in Vienna.
Clown.
Does your worship mean to geld and splay
all the youth in the city?
Escal.
No, Pompey.
Clown.
Truly, Sir, in my poor opinion, they will
to't then. If your worship will take order for the drabs
and the knaves, you need not to fear the bawds.
Escal.
There are pretty orders beginning, I can tell
you: it is but heading and hanging.
Clown.
If you head and hang all that offend that way
but for ten years together, you'll be glad to give out a
commission for more heads: if this law hold in Vienna
ten years, 2 noteI'll rent the fairest house in it, after three
pence a bay: if you live to see this come to pass, say,
Pompey told you so.
Escal.
Thank you, good Pompey; and in requital
of your prophecy, hark you; I advise you, let me not
find you before me again upon any complaint whatsoever;
no, not for dwelling where you do; if I do,
Pompey, I shall beat you to your tent, and prove a
shrewd Cæsar to you: in plain dealing, Pompey, I
shall have you whipt: so for this time, Pompey, fare
you well.
-- 380 --
Clown.
I thank your worship for your good counsel;
but I shall follow it, as the flesh and fortune shall better
determine.
Whip me? no, no; let carman whip his jade;
The valiant heart's not whipt out of his trade.
[Exit.
Alexander Pope [1747], The works of Shakespear in eight volumes. The Genuine Text (collated with all the former Editions, and then corrected and emended) is here settled: Being restored from the Blunders of the first Editors, and the Interpolations of the two Last: with A Comment and Notes, Critical and Explanatory. By Mr. Pope and Mr. Warburton (Printed for J. and P. Knapton, [and] S. Birt [etc.], London) [word count] [S11301].