Hotspur, his son.
Edmund Mortimer, Earl of March.
Archibald, Earl of Douglas.
Scroop, Archbishop of York.
Sir Michael, friend of the Archbishop.
Owen Glendower.
Sir Richard Vernon.
Sir John Falstaff, irregular humorist.
Poins, irregular humorist.
Bardolph, irregular humorist.
Peto, irregular humorist.
Gadshill, irregular humorist.
Lady Percy, wife of Hotspur and sister of Mortimer.
Mrs. Quickly, of the Boar's Head, Eastcheap.
Lords, Officers, Attendants, Sheriff, Vintner, Chamberlain, Drawers, Carriers, Travellers.
Carrier, Carrier 1, Carrier 2, Ostler, Chamberlain, Traveller, Travellers, Servant, Drawer, Vintner, Sherriff, Messenger
-- --
THE HISTORIE OF Henry the fourth.
[First section]
Enter the King, Lord Iohn of Lancaster, Earle of Westmerland, with others.
King.
So shaken as we are, so wan with care,
Find we a time for frighted peace to pant,
And breath short winded accents of new broiles
To be commencte in stronds a far remote:
No more the thirsty entrance of this soile
Shal dawbe her lips with her own childrens bloud,
No more shall trenching war channel her fields,
Nor bruise her flourets with the armed hoofes
Of hostile paces: those opposed eies,
Which like the meteors of a troubled heauen,
Al of one nature, of one substance bred,
Did lately meete in the intestine shocke
And furious close of ciuill butcherie,
Shall now in mutuall welbeseeming rankes,
March all one way, and be no more oppos'd
Against acquaintance, kindred and allyes.
The edge of war, like an ill sheathed knife,
No more shall cut his maister: therefore friends,
As far as to the sepulcher of Christ,
Whose soldiour now, vnder whose blessed crosse
We are impressed and ingag'd to fight,
Forthwith a power of English shall we leauy,
Whose armes were moulded in their mothers wombe,
To chase these pagans in those holy fields,
Ouer whose acres walkt those blessed feet,
-- --
Which 1400. yeares ago were naild,
For our aduantage on the bitter crosse.
But this our purpose now is twelue month old,
And bootelesse tis to tell you we wil go.
Therefore we meet not nowe: then let me heare
Of you my gentle Cosen Westmerland,
What yesternight our counsell did decree
In forwarding this deere expedience.
West.
My liege, this haste was hot in question,
And many limits of the charge set down
But yesternight, when all athwart there came
A post from Wales, loden with heauy newes,
Whose worst was that the noble Mortimer,
Leading the men of Herdforshire to fight
Against the irregular, and wild Glendower,
Was by the rude hands of that Welchman taken,
A thousand of his people butchered,
Vpon whose dead corpes there was such misuse,
Such beastly shamelesse transformation
By those Welch-women done, as may not be
Without much shame, retould, or spoken of.
King.
It seemes then that the tidings of this broile,
Brake off our businesse for the holy land.
West.
This matcht with other did, my gratious L.
For more vneuen and vnwelcome newes
Came from the North, and thus it did import,
On holly rode day, the gallant Hotspur there,
Yong Harry Percy, and braue Archibold,
That euer valiant and approued Scot,
At Holmedon met, where they did spend
A sad and bloudy houre:
As by discharge of their artillery,
And shape of likelihood the newes was told:
For he that brought them in the very heat
And pride of their contention, did take horse
Vncertaine of the issue any way.
King.
Here is deere, a true industrious friend,
Sir Walter Blunt new lighted from his horse,
-- --
Staind with the variation of each soile,
Betwixt that Holmedon and this seat of ours:
And he hath brought vs smothe and welcom newes,
The Earle of Douglas is discomfited,
Ten thousand bould Scots, two and twenty knights
Balkt in their own bloud. Did sir Walter see
On Holmedons plaines, of prisoners Hotspur tooke
Mordake Earle of Fife, and eldest sonne
To beaten Douglas, and the Earle of Athol,
Of Murrey, Angus, and Menteith:
And is not this an honorable spoile?
A gallant prize? Ha coosen, is it not?
In faith it is.
West.
A conquest for a Prince to boast of.
King.
Yea, there thou makst me sad, and makst me sinne
In enuy, that my Lord Northumberland
Should be the father to so blest a sonne:
A sonne, who is the theame of honors tongue,
Amongst a groue, the very straightest plant,
Who is sweet fortunes minion and her pride,
Whilst I by looking on the praise of him
See ryot and dishonour staine the brow
Of my young Harry. O that it could be prou'd
That some night tripping fairy had exchang'd,
In cradle clothes our children where they lay,
And cald mine Percy, his Plantagenet,
Then would I haue his Harry, and he mine:
But let him from my thoughts. What think you coose
Of this young Percies pride? The prisoners
Which he in this aduenture hath surprizd
To his own vse, he keepes and sends me word
I shal haue none but Mordake Earle of Fife.
West.
This is his vncles teaching. This is Worcester,
Maleuolent to you in all aspects,
Which makes him prune himselfe, and bristle vp
The crest of youth against your dignity.
King.
But I haue sent for him to answere this:
And for this cause a while we must neglect
Our holy purpose to Ierusalem.
-- --
Coosen on wednesday next our councel we wil hold
At Windsore, so informe the Lords:
But come your selfe with speed to vs againe,
For more is to be said and to be done,
Then out of anger can be vttered.
West.
I will my liege.
Exeunt.
Enter prince of Wales, and Sir Iohn Falstaffe.
Falst.
Now Hal, what time of day is it lad?
Prince.
Thou art so fat-witted with drinking of olde sacke,
and vnbuttoning thee after supper, and sleeping vpon benches
after noone; that thou hast forgotten to demaunde that truelie
which thou wouldest trulie knowe. What a diuell hast thou to
do with the time of the daie? vnles houres were cups of sacke,
and minutes capons, and clockes the tongues of Baudes, and
Dialles the signes of leaping houses, and the blessed sunne
himselfe a faire hot wench in flame-couloured taffata; I see no
reason why thou shouldst be so superfluous to demaunde the
time of the day.
Falst.
Indeede you come neere me nowe Hal, for wee that
take purses go by the moone and the seuen stars, and not by
Phœbus, he, that wandring knight so faire: and I prethe sweet
wag when thou art a king, as God saue thy grace: maiestie I
should say, for grace thou wilt haue none.
Prince.
What none?
Falst.
No by my troth, not so much as will serue to bee prologue
to an egge and butter.
Prin.
Wel, how then? come roundly, roundly.
Falst.
Marry then sweet wag, when thou art king let not vs
that are squiers of the nights bodie, bee called theeues of the
daies beauty: let vs be Dianaes forresters, gentlemen of the
shade, minions of the moone, and let men say wee be men of
good gouernement, being gouerned as the sea is, by our noble
and chast mistresse the moone, vnder whose countenaunce
we steale.
Prince.
Thou saiest well, and it holds wel to, for the fortune
of vs that are the moones men, doth ebbe and flow like the sea,
being gouerned as the sea is by the moone, as for proofe. Now
-- --
a purse of gold most resolutely snatcht on Munday night and
most dissolutely spent on tuesday morning, got with swearing,
lay by, and spent with crying, bring in, now in as low an ebbe
as the foot of the ladder, and by and by in as high a flow as the
ridge of the gallowes.
Falst.
By the Lord thou saist true lad, and is not my hostesse
of the tauerne a most sweet wench?
Prin.
As the hony of Hibla my old lad of the castle, and is
not a buffe Ierkin a most sweet robe of durance?
Falst.
How now, how nowe mad wag, what in thy quips
and thy quiddities? what a plague haue I to doe with a buffe
Ierkin?
Prince.
Why what a poxe haue I to do with my hostesse of
the tauerne?
Falst.
Well, thou hast cald her to a reckoning many a time
and oft.
Prince.
Did I euer call for thee to pay thy part?
Falst.
No, ile giue thee thy due, thou hast paid all there.
Prin.
Yea and else where, so far as my coine would stretch,
and where it would not, I haue vsed my credit.
Falst.
Yea, and so vs'd it that were it not here apparant that
thou art heire apparant. But I prethe sweet wag, shall there be
gallowes standing in England when thou art king? and resolution
thus fubd as it is with the rusty curbe of olde father Anticke
the law, do not thou when thou art king hang a theefe.
Prince.
No, thou shalt.
Falst.
Shall I? O rare! by the Lord ile be a braue iudge.
Prin.
Thou iudgest false already, I meane thou shalt haue
the hanging of the theeues, and so become a rare hangman.
Falst.
Well Hall well, and in some sort it iumpes with my
humour, as well as waighting in the Court I can tell you.
Prin.
For obtaining of suites?
Falst.
Yea, for obtaining of suites, whereof the hangman
hath no leane wardrob. Zbloud I am as melancholy as a gyb
Cat, or a lugd beare.
Prin.
Or an old lyon, or a louers Lute.
Falst.
Yea, or the drone of a Lincolnshire bagpipe.
Prince.
What saiest thou to a Hare, or the malancholy of
-- --
Mooreditch?
Falst.
Thou hast the most vnsauory smiles, and art indeed
the most comparatiue rascalliest sweer yong Prince. But Hal,
I prethe trouble me no more with vanitie, I woulde to God
thou and I knewe where a commodity of good names were
to be bought: an olde Lorde of the councell rated me the other
day in the street about you sir, but I markt him not, and
yet he talkt very wisely, but I regarded him not, and yet hee
talkt wisely and in the street to.
Prin.
Thou didst well, for wisedome cries out in the streets
and no man regards it.
Falst.
O thou hast damnable iteration, and art indeed able
to corrupt a saint: thou hast done much harme vpon me Hal,
God forgiue thee for it: before I knewe thee Hal, I knewe nothing,
and now am I, if a man should speake trulie, little better
then one of the wicked: I must giue ouer this life, and I will
giue it ouer: by the Lord and I doe not, I am a villaine, ile bee
damnd for neuer a kings sonne in Christendom.
Prin.
Where shal we take a purse to morrow Iacke?
Falst.
Zounds where thou wilt lad, ile make one, an I do not
call me villaine and baffell me.
Prin.
I see a good amendment of life in thee, from praying
to purse-taking.
Fal.
Why Hall, tis my vocation Hall, tis no sinne for a man
to labor in his vocation.
Enter Poines.
Poynes nowe shall we knowe if Gadshill haue set a match.
O if men were to be saued by merit, what hole in hell were hot
enough for him? this is the most omnipotent villaine that euer
cried, stand, to a true man.
Prin.
Good morrow Ned.
Poines.
Good morrow sweete Hal. What saies Monsieur
remorse? what saies sir Iohn Sacke, and Sugar Iacke? howe
agrees the Diuell and thee about thy soule that thou souldest
him on good friday last, for a cup of Medera and a cold capons
legge.
Prince.
Sir Iohn stands to his word, the diuell shall haue his
bargaine, for he was neuer yet a breaker of prouerbes: he will
giue the diuell his due.
-- --
Poynes.
Then art thou damnd for keeping thy worde with
the diuell.
Prince.
Else hee had bin damnd for coosening the diuell.
Poy.
But my lads, my lads, to morrow morning, by foure a
clocke early at Gadshill, there are pilgrims going to Canturburie
with rich offerings, and traders riding to London with fat
purses. I haue vizards for you al you haue horses for your selues,
Gadshill lies to night in Rochester, I haue bespoke supper to
morrow night in Eastcheape: we may do it as secure as sleepe,
if you will go I will stuffe your purses full of crownes: if you will
not, tarie at home and be hangd.
Falst.
Heare ye Yedward, if I tarry at home and go not, ile
hang you for going.
Po.
You will chops.
Falst.
Hal, wilt thou make one?
Prince.
Who I rob, I a thiefe? not I by my faith.
Falst.
Theres neither honestie, manhood, nor good fellowship
in thee, nor thou camst not of the bloud roiall, if thou darest not
stand for ten shillings.
Prince.
Well then, once in my dayes ile be a madcap.
Falst.
Why thats well said.
Prince.
Well, come what wil, ile tarrie at home.
Falst.
By the lord, ile be a traitor then, when thou art king.
Prince.
I care not.
Po.
Sir Iohn, I preethe leaue the prince and mee alone, I will
lay him downe such reasons for this aduenture that he shall go.
Falst.
Well God giue thee the spirit of perswasion, and him
the eares of profiting that what thou speakest, may moue, and
what he heares, may be beleeued, that the true prince may (for
recreation sake) proue a false thiefe, for the poore abuses of the
time want countenance: farewel you shal find me in Eastcheap
Prin.
Farewel the latter spring, farewel Alhallowne summer.
Poin.
Now my good sweete hony Lord, ride with vs to morrow.
I haue a ieast to execute, that I cannot mannage alone.
Falstalffe Haruey, Rossill, and Gadshil, shal rob those men that
we haue already way-laid, your selfe and I will not bee there:
and when they haue the bootie, if you and I doe not rob them,
cut this head off from my shoulders.
-- --
Prin.
How shall we part with them in setting forth?
Po.
Why, we wil set forth before or after them, and appoint
them a place of meeting, wherein it is at our pleasure to faile;
and then wil they aduenture vp&obar; the exploit themselues, which
they shal haue no sooner atchieued but weele set vpon them.
Prin.
Yea but tis like that they wil know vs by our horses, by
our habits, and by euery other appointment to be our selues.
Po.
Tut, our horses they shal not see, ile tie them in the wood,
our vizards wee wil change after wee leaue them: and sirrha, I
haue cases of Buckrom for the nonce, to immaske our noted
outward garments.
Prin.
Yea, but I doubt they wil be too hard for vs.
Po.
Wel, for two of them, I know them to bee as true bred
cowards as euer turnd backe: and for the third, if he fight longer
then he sees reason, ile forsweare armes. The vertue of this ieast
wil be the incomprehensible lies, that this same fat rogue wil tel
vs when we meet at supper, how thirtie at least he fought with,
what wardes, what blowes, what extremities he indured, and in
the reproofe of this liues the iest.
Prin.
Well, ile goe with thee, prouide vs all thinges necessarie,
and meete me to morrow night in Eastcheape, there ile
sup: farewell.
Po.
Farewel my Lord.
Exit Poines.
Prin.
I know you all, and wil a while vphold
The vnyokt humour of your idlenes,
Yet herein wil I imitate the sunne,
Who doth permit the base contagious clouds
To smother vp his beautie from the world,
That when he please againe to be himselfe,
Being wanted he may be more wondred at
By breaking through the foule and ougly mists
Of vapours that did seeme to strangle him.
If all the yeere were playing holly-dayes,
To sport would be as tedious as to worke;
But when they seldome come, they wisht for come,
And nothing pleaseth but rare accidents:
So when this loose behauiour I throw off,
And pay the debt I neuer promised,
-- --
By how much better then my word I am,
By so much shall I falsifie mens hopes,
And like bright mettal on a sullein ground,
My reformation glittring ore my fault,
Shal shew more goodly, and attract more eyes
Then that which hath no foile to set it off.
Ile so offend, to make offence a skill,
Redeeming time when men thinke least I wil.
Exit.
Enter the King, Northumberland, Worcester, Hotspur, sir Walter blunt, with others.
King.
My blood hath bin too colde and temperate,
Vnapt to stir at these indignities,
And you haue found me, for accordingly
You tread vpon my patience, but be sure
I will from henceforth rather be my selfe
Mightie, and to be fearde, then my condition
Which hath bin smooth as oile, soft as yong downe,
And therefore lost that title of respect,
Which the proud soule neare payes but to the proud.
Wor.
Our house (my soueraigne liege) little deserues
The scourge of greatnes to be vsd on it,
And that same greatnesse to, which our owne hands
Haue holpe to make so portly.
Nor.
My Lord.
King.
Worcester get thee gone, for I do see
Danger, and disobedience in thine eie:
O sir, your presence is too bold and peremptorie,
And Maiestie might neuer yet endure
The moodie frontier of a seruant browe,
You haue good leaue to leaue vs, when we need
Your vse and counsel we shall send for you.
Exit. Wor.
You were about to speake.
North.
Yea my good Lord.
Those prisoners in your highnes name demanded,
Which Harry Percy here at Holmedon tooke,
Were as he saies, not with such strength denied
As is deliuered to your maiestie.
Either enuie therefore, or misprision,
Is guiltie of this fault, and not my sonne.
-- --
Hotsp.
My liege, I did denie no prisoners,
But I remember when the fight was done,
When I was drie with rage, and extreame toile,
Breathles and faint, leaning vpon my sword,
Came there a certaine Lord, neat and trimly drest,
Fresh as a bridegroome, and his chin new rept,
Shewd like a stubble land at haruest home,
He was perfumed like a Milliner,
And twixt his finger and his thumbe he helde
A pouncet boxe, which euer and anon
He gaue his nose, and tookt away againe,
Who therewith angry, when it next came there
Tooke it in snuffe, and still hee smild and talkt:
And as the souldiours bore dead bodies by,
He cald them vntaught knaues, vnmanerlie,
To bring a slouenly vnhandsome coarse
Betwixt the winde and his nobilitie:
With many holly-day and ladie termes
He questioned me, amongst the rest demanded
My prisoners in your Maiesties behalfe.
I then, all smarting with my wounds being cold,
To be so pestred with a Popingay,
Out of my griefe and my impacience
Answerd neglectingly, I know not what
He should, or he should not, for he made me mad
To see him shine so briske, and smell so sweet,
And talke so like a waiting gentlewoman,
Of guns, and drums, and wounds, God saue the mark:
And telling me the soueraignest thing on earth
Was Parmacitie, for an inward bruise,
And that it was great pitty, so it was,
This villanous saltpeeter, should be digd
Out of the bowels of the harmeles earth,
Which many a good tall fellow had destroyed
So cowardly, and but for these vile guns
He would himselfe haue beene a souldior.
This bald vnioynted chat of his (my Lord)
I answered indirectly (as I said)
-- --
And I beseech you, let not his report
Come currant for an accusation
Betwixt my loue and your high maiestie.
Blunt.
The circumstance considered, good my lord,
What ere Lord Harry Percie then had said
To such a person, and in such a place,
At such a time, with all the rest retold,
May reasonably die, and neuer rise
To do him wrong, or any way impeach
What then he said, so he vnsay it now.
King.
Why yet he doth denie his prisoners,
But with prouiso and exception,
That we at our owne charge shall ransome straight
His brother in law, the foolish Mortimer,
Who on my soule, hath wilfully betraid
The liues of those, that he did lead to fight
Against that great Magitian, damnd Glendower,
Whose daughter as we heare, that Earle of March
Hath lately married: shall our coffers then
Be emptied, to redeeme a traitor home?
Shall we buy treason? and indent with feares
When they haue lost and forfeited themselues?
No, on the barren mountaines let him starue:
For I shall neuer hold that man my friend,
Whose tongue shall aske me for one penny cost
To ransome home reuolted Mortimer,
Hot.
Reuolted Mortimer:
He neuer did fall off, my soueraigne liege
But by the chance of war, to proue that true
Needs no more but one tongue: for all those wounds,
Those mouthed wounds which valiantly he tooke,
When on the gentle Seuerns siedgie banke,
In single opposition hand to hand,
He did confound the best part of an houre,
In changing hardiment with great Glendower,
Three times they breathd, & three times did they drinke
Vpon agreement of swift Seuerns floud,
Who then affrighted with their bloudie lookes,
-- --
Ran fearefully among the trembling reedes,
And hid his crispe-head in the hollow banke,
Bloud-stained with these valiant combatants,
Neuer did bare and rotten pollicy
Colour her working with such deadly wounds,
Nor neuer could the noble Mortimer
Receiue so many, and all willingly,
Then let not him be slandered with reuolt.
King.
Thou dost bely him Percy, thou dost bely him,
He neuer did encounter with Glendower:
I tel thee, he durst as well haue met the diuell alone,
As Owen Glendower for an enemy.
Art thou not asham'd? but sirrha, henceforth
Let me not heare you speake of Mortimer:
Send me your prisoners with the speediest meanes,
Or you shal heare in such a kind from me
As will displease you. My Lord Northumberland:
We licence your departure with your sonne,
Send vs your prisoners, or you wil heare of it.
Exit King
Hot.
And if the diuel come and rore for them
I wil not send them: I will after straight
And tel him so, for I will ease my hart,
Albeit I make a hazard of my head.
Nor.
What? dronk with choler, stay, & pause a while,
Here comes your vncle.
Enter Wor.
Hot.
Speake of Mortimer?
Zounds I will speake of him, and let my soule
Want mercy if I do not ioine with him:
Yea on his part ile empty all these vaines,
And shed my deere bloud, drop by drop in the dust,
But I will lift the down-trod Mortimer
As high in the aire as this vnthankefull king,
As this ingrate and cankred Bullingbrooke.
Nor.
Brother, the king hath made your nephew mad.
Wor.
Who strooke this heat vp after I was gone?
Hot.
He wil forsooth haue all my prisoners,
And when I vrg'd the ransome once againe
Of my wiues brother, then his cheeke lookt pale,
-- --
And on my face he turn'd an eie of death,
Trembling euen at the name of Mortimer.
Worst.
I cannot blame him, was not he proclaim'd
By Richard that dead is, the next of bloud?
North.
He was, I heard the proclamation:
And then it was, when the vnhappy king,
(Whose wrongs in vs God pardon) did set forth
Vpon his Irish expedition;
From whence he intercepted, did returne
To be depos'd, and shortly murdered.
Worst.
And for whose death, we in the worlds wide mouth
Liue scandaliz'd and fouly spoken of.
Hot.
But soft, I pray you did king Richard then
Proclaime my brother Edmund Mortimer
Heire to the crowne?
North.
He did, my selfe did heare it.
Hot.
Nay then I cannot blame his coosen king,
That wisht him on the barren mountaines starue,
But shal it be that you that set the crowne
Vpon the head of this forgetful man,
And for his sake weare the detested blot
Of murtherous subornation? shal it be
That you a world of curses vndergo,
Being the agents, or base second meanes,
The cordes, the ladder, or the hangman rather,
O pardon me, that I descend so low,
To shew the line and the predicament,
Wherein you range vnder this subtil king!
Shall it for shame be spoken in these daies,
Or fil vp Chronicles in time to come,
That men of your nobility and power
Did gage them both in an vniust behalfe,
(As both of you God pardon it, haue done)
To put down Richard, that sweet louely Rose,
And plant this thorne, this canker Bullingbrooke?
And shal it in more shame be further spoken,
That you are foold, discarded, and shooke off
By him, for whom these shames ye vnderwent?
-- --
No, yet time serues, wherein you may redeeme
Your banisht honors, and restore your selues
Into the good thoughts of the world againe:
Reuenge the ieering and disdaind contempt
Of this proud king, who studies day and night
To answere all the debt he owes to you,
Euen with the bloudie paiment of your deaths:
Therefore I say.
Wor.
Peace coosen, say no more.
And now I will vnclaspe a secret booke,
And to your quicke conceiuing discontents
Ile reade you matter deepe and daungerous,
As full of perill and aduenterous spirit,
As to orewalke a Current roring lowd,
On the vnstedfast footing of a speare.
Hot.
If he fall in, god-night, or sinke, or swim,
Send danger from the East vnto the West.
So honor crosse it, from the North to South,
And let them grapple: O the bloud more stirs
To rouse a lyon than to start a hare.
North.
Imagination of some great exploit
Driues him beyond the bounds of patience.
By heauen me thinkes it were an easie leape,
To plucke bright honour from the palefac'd moone,
Or diue into the bottome of the deepe,
Where fadome line could neuer touch the ground,
And plucke vp drowned honour by the locks,
So he that doth redeeme her thence might weare
Without corriuall all her dignities,
But out vpon this halfe fac't fellowship.
Wor.
He apprehends a world of figures here,
But not the forme of what he should attend,
Good coosen giue me audience for a while.
Hot.
I crie you mercie.
Wor.
Those same noble Scots that are your prisoners
Hot.
Ile keepe them all;
By God he shall not haue a Scot of them,
No, if a Scot would saue his soule he shall not.
-- --
Ile keepe them by this hand.
Wor.
You, start away,
And lend no eare vnto my purposes:
Those prisoners you shall keepe.
Hot.
Nay I will: thats flat:
He said he would not ransome Mortimer,
Forbad my tongue to speake of Mortimer,
But I will find him when he lies asleepe,
And in his eare ile hollow Mortimer:
Nay, ile haue a starling shalbe taught to speake
Nothing but Mortimer, and giue it him
To keepe his anger still in motion.
Wor.
Heare you cosen a word.
Hot.
All studies here I solemnly defie,
Saue how to gall and pinch this Bullenbrooke,
And that same sword and buckler Prince of Wales,
But that I thinke his father loues him not,
And would be glad he met with some mischance:
I would haue him poisoned with a pot of ale.
Wor.
Farewel kinsman, ile talke to you
When you are better temperd to attend.
Nor.
Why what a waspe-stung and impatient foole
Art thou? to breake into this womans moode,
Tying thine eare to no toung but thine owne?
Hot.
Why looke you, I am whipt and scourg'd with rods,
Netled, and stung with pismires, when I heare
Of this vile polititian Bullingbrooke,
In Richards time, what do you call the place?
A plague vpon it, it is in Glocestershire;
Twas where the mad-cap duke his vncle kept
His vncle Yorke, where I first bowed my knee
Vnto this king of smiles, this Bullenbrooke:
Zbloud, when you and he came backe from Rauenspurgh.
North.
At Barkly castle.
Hot.
You say true.
Why what a candy deale of curtesie,
This fawning greyhound then did profer me,
Looke when his infant fortune came to age,
And gentle Harry Percy, and kind coosen:
-- --
O the diuill take such coosoners, god forgiue me,
Good vncle tell your tale, I haue done.
Wor.
Nay, if you haue not, to it againe,
We wil stay your leisure.
Hot.
I haue done Ifaith.
Wor.
Then once more to your Scottish prisoners,
Deliuer them vp without their ransome straight,
And make the Douglas sonne your only meane
For Powers in Scotland, which for diuers reasons
Which I shall send you written, be assur'd
Wil easely be granted you my Lord.
Your sonne in Scotland being thus emploied,
Shal secretly into the bosome creepe
Of that same noble prelat welbelou'd,
The Archbishop.
Hot.
Of Yorke, is it not?
Wor.
True, who beares hard
His brothers death at Bristow the lord Scroop,
I speake not this in estimation,
As what I thinke might be, but what I know
Is ruminated, plotted, and set downe,
And onely staies but to behold the face
Of that occasion that shal bring it on.
Hot.
I smell it. Vpon my life it will do well.
Nort.
Before the game is afoote thou still letst slip.
Hot.
Why, it cannot chuse but be a noble plot,
And then the power of Scotland, and of Yorke,
To ioine with Mortimer, ha.
Wor.
And so they shall.
Hot.
In faith it is exceedingly well aimd.
Wor.
And tis no little reason bids vs speed,
To saue our heads by raising of a head,
For beare our selues as euen as we can,
The king will alwaies thinke him in our debt,
And thinke we thinke our selues vnsatisfied,
Till he hath found a time to pay vs home.
And see already how he doth begin
To make vs strangers to his lookes of loue.
-- --
Hot.
He does, he does, weele be reueng'd on him.
Worst.
Coosen farewell. No further go in this,
Then I by letters shall direct your course
When time is ripe, which will be suddenly,
Ile steale to Glendower, and Lo: Mortimer,
Where you and Douglas, and our powres at once,
As I will fashion it shall happily meete,
To beare our fortunes in our own strong armes,
Which now we hold at much vncertainty.
Nor.
Farewell good brother, we shall thriue I trust.
Hot.
Vncle adieu: O let the houres be short,
Till fields, and blowes, and grones, applaud our sport.
Exeunt
Enter a Carrier with a lanterne in his hand
1 Car.
Heigh ho. An it be not foure by the day ile be hangd,
Charles waine is ouer the new Chimney, and yet our horse not
packt. What Ostler.
Ost.
Anon, anon.
1 Car.
I preethe Tom beat Cuts saddle, put a few flockes in
the point, poore iade is wroong in the withers, out of all cesse.
Enter another Carier.
2 Car.
Pease and beanes are as danke here as a dog, and that
is the next way to giue poore iades the bots: this house is turned
vpside downe since Robin Ostler died.
1 Car
Poore fellow neuer ioied since the prise of Oates rose,
it was the death of him.
2 Car.
I thinke this be the most villainous house in al London
road for fleas, I am stung like a Tench.
1 Car.
Like a Tench, by the Masse there is nere a King christen
could be better bit then I haue bin since the first cocke.
2 Car.
Why they will allowe vs nere a Iordane, and then we
leake in your chimney, and your chamber-lie breedes fleas like
a loach.
1 Car.
What Ostler, come away and be hangd, come away.
2 Car.
I haue a gammon of bacon, and two razes of Ginger,
to be deliuered as far as Charing crosse.
1 Car
Gods bodie, the Turkies in my Panier are quite starued:
what Ostler? a plague on thee, hast thou neuer an eie in thy
head? canst not heare, and twere not as good deede as drinke to
-- --
break the pate on thee, I am a very villaine, come and be hangd,
hast no faith in thee?
Enter Gadshill.
Gadshill.
Good morrow Cariers, whats a clocke?
Car.
I thinke it be two a clocke.
Gad
I prethe lend me thy lanterne, to see my gelding in the
stable.
1 Car.
Nay by God soft, I knowe a tricke worth two of that
I faith.
Gad.
I pray thee lend me thine.
2 Car.
I when canst tell? lend me thy lanterne (quoth he) marry
ile see thee hangd first.
Gad.
Sirrha Carrier, what time doe you meane to come to
London?
2 Car.
Time enough to go to bed with a candle, I warrant
thee, come neighbour Mugs, weele call vp the Gentlemen,
they will along with company for they haue great charge.
Exeunt.
Enter Chamberlaine.
Gad.
What ho: Chamberlaine.
Cham.
At hand quoth pickepurse.
Gad.
Thats euen as faire as at hand quoth the Chamberlaine:
for thou variest no more from picking of purses, then giuing direction
doth from labouring: thou laiest the plot how.
Cham.
Good morrow maister Gadshil, it holdes currant that
I tolde you yesternight, ther's a Frankelin in the wilde of Kent
hath brought three hundred Markes with him in golde, I heard
him tell it to one of his company last night at supper, a kinde of
Auditor, one that hath abundance of charge too, God knowes
what, they are vp already, and cal for Egges and butter, they wil
away presently.
Gad.
Sirrha, if they meete not with Saint Nicholas clearkes,
ile giue thee this necke.
Cham.
No, ile none of it, I pray thee keepe that for the hangman,
for I know thou worshippest Saint Nicholas, as trulie as
a man of falshood may.
Ga.
What talkest thou to me of the h&abar;gman? if I hang, ile make
a fat paire of Gallowes: for if I hang, olde sir Iohn hangs with
me, and thou knowest hee is no starueling: tut, there are other
-- --
Troians that thou dreamst not of, the which for sport sake are
content to do the profession, some grace, that would (if matters
should be lookt into) for their owne credit sake make all whole.
I am ioyned with no footlande rakers, no long-staffe sixpennie
strikers, none of these mad mustachio purplehewd maltworms,
but with nobilitie, and tranquilitie, Burgomasters and great
Oneyres, such as can hold in such as wil strike sooner then speak,
and speake sooner then drinke, and drinke sooner then pray, and
yet (zoundes) I lie, for they pray continuallie to their Saint the
Common-wealth, or rather not pray to her, but pray on her, for
they ride vp and downe on her, and make her their bootes
Cham.
What, the Common-wealth their bootes? will shee
hold out water in foule way?
Gad.
She will, she will, Iustice hath liquord her: we steale as
in a Castell cocksure: wee haue the receyte of Ferneseede, wee
walke inuisible.
Cham.
Nay by my fayth, I thinke you are more beholding to
the night then to Ferneseed, for your walking inuisible.
Gad.
Giue mee thy hand, thou shalt haue a share in our purchase,
as I am a true man.
Cham
Nay rather let me haue it, as you are a false theefe.
Gad.
Go to, homo is a common name to al men: bid the Ostler
bring my gelding out of the stable, farewel you muddy knaue.
Enter Prince, Poines, and Peto, &c.
Po.
Come shelter, shelter, I haue remoude Falstalffes horse,
and he frets like a gumd Veluet.
Prin.
Stand close.
Enter Falstalffe.
Falst.
Poynes, Poynes, and be hangd Poynes.
Prin.
Peace ye fat-kidneyd rascal, what a brawling dost thou
keepe?
Falst.
Wheres Poynes Hall?
Prin.
He is walkt vp to the top of the hill, Ile go seeke him.
Falst.
I am accurst to rob in that theeues companie, the rascal
hath remooued my horse, and tied him I knowe not where, if I
trauell but foure foote by the squire further a foote, I shall breake
my winde. Well, I doubt not but to die a faire death for all
this, if I scape hanging for killing that rogue. I haue forsworne
his companie hourly any time this xxii. yeares, and yet I am bewitcht
-- --
with the rogues companie. If the rascall haue not giuen
me medicines to make mee loue him, ile be hangd. It could
not be else, I haue drunke medicines, Poynes, Hall, a plague
vpon you both. Bardoll, Peto, ile starue ere ile rob a foote
further, and twere not as good a deede as drinke to turne trueman,
and to leaue these rogues, I am the veriest varlet that euer
chewed with a tooth: eight yeardes of vneuen ground is threescore
and ten myles a foote with mee, and the stonie hearted
villaines knowe it well inough, a plague vpon it when theeues
can not be true one to another:
They whistle,
Whew, a plague vpon you all, giue mee my horse you rogues,
giue me my horse and be hangd:
Prin.
Peace ye fat guts, lie downe, laie thine eare close to the
ground, and lift if thou canst heare the treade of trauellers.
Falst.
Haue you any leauers to lift me vp againe being down,
zbloud ile not beare mine owne flesh so farre a foote againe for
all the coine in thy fathers Exchequer: What a plague meane
ye to colt me thus?
Prin.
Thou liest, thou art not colted, thou art vncolted.
Falst.
I preethe good prince, Hal, helpe me to my horse, good
kings sonne.
Prin.
Out ye rogue, shall I be your Ostler?
Falst.
Hang thy selfe in thine owne heire apparant garters,
if I be tane, ile peach for this: and I haue not Ballads made on
you all, and sung to filthie tunes, let a cuppe of sacke bee my
poyson, when a ieast is so forward, and a foote too I hate it.
Enter Gadshill.
Gad.
Stand.
Falst.
So I do against my will.
Po.
O tis our setter, I know his voice, Bardoll, what newes.
Bar.
Case yee, case yee on with your vizards, theres money
of the kings comming downe the hill, tis going to the Kings
Exchequer.
Falst.
You lie ye rougue, tis going to the kings Tauerne.
Gad.
Theres inough to make vs all:
Falst.
To be hangd.
Prin.
Sirs you foure shall front them in the narrowe lane: Ned
Poines, and I wil walke lower, if they scape from your encounter,
-- --
then they light on vs.
Peto.
How many be there of them?
Gad.
Some eight or ten.
Fal
Zounds will they not rob vs?
Prin.
What, a coward sir Iohn paunch.
Fal.
In deed I am not Iohn of Gaunt your grandfather, but
yet no coward, Hall.
Prin.
Well, we leaue that to the proofe.
Po.
Sirrha Iacke, thy horse standes behinde the hedge, when
thou needst him, there thou shalt find him: farewel & stand fast.
Fal.
Now can not I strike him if I should be hangd.
Prin.
Ned, where are our disguises?
Po.
Here, hard by, stand close.
Fal.
Now my maisters, happie man bee his dole, say I, euerie
man to his businesse.
Enter the trauailers.
Trauel.
Come neighbour, the boy shal lead our horses down
the hill, weele walke a foote a while and ease our legs.
Theeues.
Stand.
Trauel.
Iesus blesse vs.
Falst.
Strike, downe with them, cut the villaines throates, a
horeson Caterpillars, bacon-fed knaues, they hate vs youth,
downe with them, fleece them.
Tra.
O we are vndone, both we and ours for euer.
Fal.
Hang ye gorbellied knaues, are ye vndone, no yee fatte
chuffes, I would your store were here: on bacons on, what yee
knaues yong men must liue, you are grand iurers, are ye, weele
iure ye faith.
Here they rob them and bind them.
Exeunt.
Enter the prince and Poynes.
Prin.
The theeues haue bound the true men, nowe coulde
thou and I rob the theeues, and go merilie to London, it would
be argument for a week, laughter for a month, and a good iest
for euer.
Po.
Stand close, I heare them comming.
Enter the theeues againe.
Fal.
Come my maisters, let vs share and then to horse before
day, and the Prince and Poines bee not two arrant cowardes
theres no equitie stirring, theres no more valour in that Poynes,
then in a wilde ducke.
-- --
Prin.
Your money.
Poin.
Villaines.
As they are sharing the Prince & Poins set vpon them, they all runne away, and
Falstalffe after a blow or two runs away too, leauing the bootie behind them.
Prin.
Got with much ease, Now merrily to horse: the theeues
are all scattered, and possest with feare so strongly, that they dare
not meete each other, each takes his fellow for an officer, awaie
good Ned, Falstalffe sweates to death, and lards the leane earth
as he walkes along, wert not for laughing I should pittie him.
Poynes.
How the rogue roard.
Exeunt.
Enter Hotspur solus reading a letter.
But for mine own part my Lord I could be well contented to bee
there, in respect of the loue I beare your house.
He could be contented, why is hee not then? in the respect of
the loue he beares our house: he shewes in this, he loues his own
barne better then he loues our house. Let me see some more.
The purpose you vndertake is dangerous.
Why thats certaine, tis daungerous to take a cold, to sleepe, to
drinke, but I tell you (my Lord foole) out of this nettle danger, we
plucke this flower safetie.
The purpose you vndertake is dangerous; the friends you haue named
vncertaine, the time it selfe vnsorted and your whole plot too
light, for the counterpoyse of so great an opposition.
Say you so, say you so, I say vnto you againe, you are a shallow
cowardly hind and you lie: what a lacke braine is this? by
the Lord our plot is a good plot, as euer was laid, our friends true
and constant: a good plot, good friends, and ful of expectation: an
excellent plot, verie good friends; what a frosty spirited rogue is
this? why my Lord of York commends the plot, and the generall
course of the Action. Zoundes and I were nowe by this rascall
I could braine him with his Ladies fanne. Is there not my
father, my vncle, and my selfe; Lord Edmond Mortimer, my
Lord of Yorke, and Owen Glendower is there not besides the
Dowglas, haue I not all their letters to meete me in armes by the
ninth of the next month, and are they not some of them set forward
alreadie? What a pagan rascall is this, an infidell? Ha, you
shall see now in very sinceritie of feare and cold heart, will hee to
the King, and lay open all our proceedings? O I could deuide
-- --
my selfe, and go to buffets, for mouing such a dish of skim milke
with so honorable an action. Hang him, let him tell the king, we
are prepared: I will set forward to night.
Enter his Lady.
How now Kate, I must leaue you within these two houres.
Lady.
O my good Lord, why are you thus alone?
For what offence haue I this fortnight bin
A banisht woman from my Harries bed?
Tel me sweet Lord, what ist that takes from thee
Thy stomacke, pleasure, and thy goulden sleepe?
Why dost thou bend thine eies vpon the earth?
And start so often when thou sitst alone?
Why hast thou lost the fresh bloud in thy cheekes?
And giuen my treasures and my rights of thee
To thicke eyde musing, and curst melancholy?
In thy faint slumbers I by thee haue watcht,
And heard the murmur, tales of yron wars,
Speake tearmes of mannage to thy bounding steed,
Cry courage to the field. And thou hast talkt
Of sallies, and retyres of trenches tents,
Of pallizadoes, frontiers, parapets,
Of basilisks, of canon, culuerin,
Of prisoners ransome, and of soldiors slaine,
And all the currents of a heddy fight
Thy spirit within thee hath bin so at war,
And thus hath so bestird thee in thy sleeepe,
That beads of sweat haue stood vpon thy brow
Like bubbles in a late disturbed streame
And in thy face strange motions haue appeard,
Such as we see when men restraine their breath,
On some great suddain hest. O what portents are these?
Some heauy businesse hath my Lord in hand,
And I must know it else he loues me not.
Hot.
What ho, is Gilliams with the packet gone?
Ser.
He is my Lord, an houre ago.
Hot.
Hath Butler brought those horses from the Sheriffe?
Ser.
One horse my Lord he brought euen now.
Hot.
What horse, Roane? a cropeare is it not?
Ser.
It is my Lord.
-- --
Hot.
That roane shall be my throne. Wel, I will backe him
straight. O Esperance, bid Butler lead him forth into the parke.
La.
But heare you my Lord.
Hot.
What saist thou my Lady?
La.
What is it carries you away?
Hot.
Why, my horse (my loue) my horse.
La.
Out you madhedded ape, a weazel hath not such a deale
of spleene as you are tost with. In faith ile knowe your businesse
Harry that I will, I feare my brother Mortimer doth stir about
his title, and hath sent for you to line his enterprise, but if you go.
Hot.
So far a foot I shal be weary loue.
La.
Come, come you Paraquito, answere me directly vnto
this question that I aske, in faith ile breake thy little finger Harry
and if thou wilt not tel me all things true.
Hot.
Away, away you trifler, loue, I loue thee not,
I care not for thee Kate, this is no world
To play with mammets, and to tilt with lips,
We must haue bloudy noses, and crackt crownes,
And passe them currant too: gods me my horse:
What saist thou Kate? what wouldst thou haue with me?
La.
Do you not loue me? do you not indeed?
Wel, do not then, for since you loue me not
I will not loue my selfe. Do you not loue me?
Nay tel me if you speake in iest or no?
Hot.
Come, wilt thou see me ride?
And when I am a horsebacke I will sweare
I loue thee infinitely. But harke you Kate,
I must not haue you henceforth question me
Whither I go, nor reason where about,
Whither I must, I must, and to conclude
This euening must I leaue you gentle Kate,
I know you wise, but yet no farther wise
Then Harry Percies wife, constant you are,
But yet a woman, and for secrecy
No Lady closer, for I well beleeue
Thou wilt not vtter what thou dost not know,
And so far wil I trust thee gentle Kate.
La.
How, so far.
-- --
Hot.
Not an inch further, but harke you Kate,
Whither I go, thither shal you go too:
To day will I set forth, to morrow you,
Will this content you Kate?
La.
It must of force.
Exeunt
Enter Prince and Poines.
Prin.
Ned, preethe come out of that fat roome, and lende me
thy hand to laugh a little.
Poi.
Where hast bin Hal?
Prin.
With three or foure loggerheades, amongest three or
fourescore hogsheades. I haue sounded the verie base string of
humilitie. Sirrha, I am sworne brother to a leash of drawers, and
can call them all by their christen names, as Tom, Dicke, and
Francis, they take it already vpon their saluation, that though I
be but prince of Wales, yet I am the king of Curtesie, and tel me
flatly I am no proud Iacke like Falstalffe, but a Corinthian, a lad
of metall, a good boy (by the Lord so they call me) and when I
am king of England I shall command all the good lads in Eastcheape.
They call drinking deepe, dying scarlet, and when you
breath in your watering they cry hem, and bid you play it off.
To conclude, I am so good a profici&ebar;t in one quarter of an houre
that I can drinke with any Tinker in his owne language, during
my life. I tell thee Ned thou hast lost much honour, that thou
wert not with me in this action; but sweete Ned, to sweeten
which name of Ned, I giue thee this peniworth of sugar, clapt euen
now into my hand by an vnderskinker, one that neuer spake
other English in his life then eight shillings and sixe pence, and
you are welcome, with this shrill addition, anon, anon sir; skore a
pint of bastard in the halfe moone, or so. But Ned, to driue awaie
the time till Falstalffe come: I preethe doe thou stande in
some by-roome, while I question my puny drawer to what end
he gaue me the sugar, and do thou neuer leaue calling Frances,
that his tale to me may bee nothing but anon, step aside and ile
shew thee a present.
Po.
Frances.
Prin.
Thou art perfect.
Prin.
Frances.
Enter Drawer.
Fran.
Anon, anon sir. Looke downe into the Pomgarnet,
Ralphe.
-- --
Prin.
Come hether Frances.
Fran.
My Lord.
Prin.
How long hast thou to serue Frances?
Fran.
Forsooth fiue yeeres, and as much as to.
Poi.
Frances.
Fran.
Anon, anon sir.
Prin.
Fiue yeare, berlady a long lease for the clinking of pewter,
but Frances, darest thou be so valiant, as to play the cowarde
with thy Indenture, and shewe it a faire paire of heeles, and run
from it?
Fran.
O Lord sir, ile besworne vpon all the bookes in England,
I could find in my hart.
Poin.
Frances.
Fran.
Anon sir.
Prin.
How old art thou Frances?
Fran.
Let me see, about Michelmas next I shalbe.
Poin.
Frances.
Fran.
Anon sir, pray stay a little my Lord.
Prin.
Nay but harke you Frances, for the sugar thou gauest
me, twas peniworth, wast not?
Fran.
O Lord, I would it had bin two.
Prince.
I will giue thee for it a thousand pound, aske me when
thou wilt, and thou shalt haue it.
Poin.
Frances.
Fran.
Anon, anon.
Prin.
Anon Frances, no Frances, but to morrow Frances: or
Frances a Thursday; or indeede Fraunces when thou wilt. But
Fraunces.
Fran.
My Lord.
Prin.
Wilt thou rob this leathern Ierkin, cristall button, not-pated,
agat ring, puke stocking, Caddice garter, smothe tongue,
spanish pouch?
Fran.
O Lord sir, who do you meane?
Prin.
Why then your brown bastard is your only drinke? for
looke you Fraunces, your white canuas doublet will sulley. In
Barbary sir, it cannot come to so much.
Fran.
What sir?
Poin
Frances.
Prin.
Away you rogue, dost thou not heare them cal.
Here they both cal him, the Drawer stands amazed not knowing which way to go.
Enter Vintner.
Uint.
What standst thou stil and hearst such a calling? looke
-- --
to the guests within. My Lord, old sir Iohn with halfe a douzen
more are at the doore, shal I let them in?
Pri
Let them alone awhile, and then open the doore: Poines.
Poi.
Anon, anon sir.
Enter Poines.
Prince.
Sirrha, Falstalffe and the rest of the theeues are at the
doore, shall we be merrie?
Po.
As merry as Crickets my lad, but harke ye, what cunning
match haue you made with this iest of the Drawer: come whats
the issue?
Prin.
I am now of all humors, that haue shewed themselues
humors since the oulde dayes of goodman Adam, to the pupill
age of this present twelue a clocke at midnight. Whats a clocke
Frances?
Fran.
Anon, anon sir.
Pr.
That euer this fellowe should haue fewer wordes then a
Parrat, and yet the sonne of a woman. His industrie is vp staires
and down staires, his eloquence the parcel of a reckoning. I am
not yet of Percyes minde, the Hotspur of the North, he that kils
mee some sixe or seuen douzen of Scots at a breakefast: washes
his handes, and saies to his wife, fie vpon this quiet life, I want
worke. O my sweet Harry saies she! how manie hast thou kild
to day? Giue my roane horse a drench (sayes hee) and aunsweres
some foureteene, an houre after: a trifle, a trifle. I preethe
call in Falstalffe, ile play Percy, and that damnde brawne shall
play dame Mortimer his wife. Riuo saies the drunkarde: call in
Ribs, cal in Tallow.
Enter Falstaffe.
Poin.
Welcome Iacke, where hast thou bin?
Falst.
A plague of al cowards I say, and a vengeance too, marry
and Amen: giue me a cup of sacke boy. Eare I lead this life
long, ile sow neatherstocks and mend them, and foote them too.
A plague of all cowards. Giue me a cup of sacke rogue, is there
no vertue extant?
he drinketh.
Prin.
Didst thou neuer see Titan kisse a dish of butter, pittifull
harted Titan that melted at the sweet tale of the sonnes, if thou
didst, then behold that compound.
-- --
Falst.
You rogue, heeres lime in this sacke too: there is nothing
but rogery to be found in villanous man, yet a cowarde is
worse then a cup of sacke with lime in it. A villanous cowarde.
Go thy waies old Iacke, die when thou wilt, if manhood, good
manhood be not forgot vpon the face of the earth, then am I a
shotten herring: there liues not three good men vnhangde in
England, and one of them is fat, and growes old, God helpe the
while, a bad world I say, I would I were a weauer. I could sing
psalmes, or any thing. A plague of all cowards I say still.
Prin.
How now Wolsacke, what mutter you?
Falst.
A kings sonne, if I do not beat thee out of thy kingdom
with a dagger of lath, and driue all thy subiects afore thee like a
flock of wild geese, ile neuer weare haire on my face more, you
prince of Wales.
Prin.
Why you horeson round-man, whats the matter?
Falst.
Are not you a cowarde? aunswere mee to that, and
Poines there.
Poin.
Zoundes ye fat paunch, and ye call me cowarde by the
Lord ile stab thee.
Falst.
I call thee cowarde, ile see thee damnde ere I call thee
coward, but I woulde giue a thousand pound I coulde runne as
fast as thou canst. You are streight enough in the shoulders, you
care not who sees your backe: call you that backing of your
friends, a plague vpon such backing, giue me them that will
face me, giue me a cup of sacke. I am a rogue if I drunke to day.
Prin.
O villain, thy lips are scarse wipt since thou drunkst last.
Falst.
All is one for that.
He drinketh.
A plague of all cowards still say I.
Prin,
Whats the matter?
Falst.
Whats the matter, there be foure of vs here haue tane a
thousand pound this day morning
Prin.
Where is it Iacke, where is it?
Fal.
Where is it? taken from vs it is: a hundred vppon poore
foure of vs.
Prin.
What, a hundred man?
Falst.
I am a rogue if I were not at halfe sword with a douzen
of them two houres together. I haue scapt by myracle. I am
eight times thrust through the doublet, foure through the hose,
-- --
my buckler cut through and through, my sworde hackt like a
handsaw, ecce signum. I neuer dealt better since I was a man; al
would not do. A plague of all cowards, let them speake, if they
speake more or lesse then truth, they are villains, and the sonnes
of darknesse.
Gad
Speake sirs, how was it?
Ross.
We foure set vpon some douzen.
Falst.
Sixteene at least my Lord.
Ross.
And bound them.
Peto.
No, no, they were not bound.
Falst.
You rogue they were bounde euerie man of them, or
I am a Iew else: an Ebrew Iew.
Ross.
As we were sharing, some sixe or seuen fresh men set
vpon vs.
Falst.
And vnbound the rest, and then come in the other.
Prin.
What, fought you with them all?
Falst.
Al, I know not what you cal al, but if I fought not with
fiftie of them I am a bunch of radish: if there were not two or
three and fiftie vpon poore olde Iacke, then am I no two legd
Creature.
Prin.
Pray God you haue not murdred some of them.
Falst.
Nay, thats past praying for, I haue pepperd two of them.
Two I am sure I haue paied, two rogues in buckrom sutes: I tel
thee what Hall, if I tell thee a lie, spit in my face; call me horse,
thou knowest my olde warde: here I lay, and thus I bore my
poynt, foure rogues in Buckrom let driue at me.
Prin
What foure? thou saidst but two euen now.
Falst.
Foure Hal, I told thee foure.
Poin.
I, I, he said foure.
Fal.
These foure came all a front, and mainely thrust at me,
I made me no more adoe, but tooke all their seuen points in my
target, thus.
Prin.
Seuen, why there were but foure euen now.
Falst.
In Buckrom.
Po.
I foure in Buckrom suites.
Falst.
Seuen by these hilts, or I am a villaine else.
Pr.
Preethe let him alone, we shall haue more anon.
Falst.
Doest thou heare me Hal?
-- --
Prince.
I, and marke thee to iacke.
Falst.
Do so, for it is worth the listning to, these nine in Buckrom
that I told thee of.
Prince.
So, two more alreadie.
Falst.
Their points being broken.
Poy.
Downe fell their hose.
Falst.
Began to giue me ground: but I followed me close, came
in, foot, and hand, and with a thought, seuen of the eleuen I paid.
Prin.
O monstrous! eleuen Buckrom men growne out of two.
Fal.
But as the diuell would haue it, three misbegotten knaues
in Kendall greene came at my backe, and let driue at mee, for it
was so darke Hal, that thou couldest not see thy hand.
Prin.
These lies are like their father that begets them, grosse as
a mountaine, open, palpable. Why thou clay-braind guts, thou
knotty-pated foole, thou horeson obscene greasie tallow-catch.
Falst.
What art thou mad? art thou mad? is not the truth the
truth?
Prin.
Why, how couldst thou know these men in Kendal greene
when it was so darke thou couldst not see thy hand, come tell vs
your reason. What sayest thou to this?
Po.
Come your reason, Iacke your reason.
Falst.
What, vppon compulsion: Zoundes, and I were at the
strappado, or all the rackes in the worlde, I would not tell you on
compulsion. Giue you a reason on compulsion? if reasons were
as plentifull as blackberries, I would giue no man a reason vppon
compulsion, I.
Prin.
Ile be no longer guiltie of this sinne. This sanguine coward,
this bed-presser, this horse-backe-breaker, this huge hill
of flesh.
Fa.
Zbloud you starueling, you elfskin, you dried neatstong, you
bulspizzle, you stockfish: O for breath to vtter what is like thee,
you tailers yard, you sheath, you bowcase, you vile standing tuck.
Prin.
Wel, breath a while, and then to it againe, and when thou
hast tired thy selfe in base comparisons heare mee speake but this.
Po.
Marke iacke.
Prin.
We two saw you foure set on foure, and bound them and
were maisters of their wealth: marke now how a plaine tale shall
put you downe, then did wee two set on you foure, and with a
-- --
worde, outfac't you from your prize, & haue it, yea & can shew
it you here in the house: and Falstalffe you carried your guts away
as nimbly, with as quicke dexteritie, & roard for mercy and
stil run and roard, as euer I heard bul-calf. What a slaue art thou
to hacke thy sworde as thou hast done? and then say it was in
fight. What tricke? what deuice? what starting hole canst thou
now find out, to hide thee from this open and apparant shame?
Po.
Come, lets heare iacke, what tricke hast thou now?
Falst.
By the Lord, I knew ye as wel as he that made ye. Why
heare you my maisters, was it for me to kill the heire apparant?
should I turne vpon the true prince? why thou knowest I am as
valiant as Hercules: but beware instinct, the lion will not touch
the true prince, instinct is a great matter. I was now a cowarde
on instinct, I shall thinke the better of my selfe, and thee during
my life; I for a valiant lion, and thou for a true prince: but by
the Lord, lads, I am glad you haue the money, Hostesse clap to
the doores, watch to night, pray to morrowe, gallants, lads,
boyes, hearts of golde, all the titles of good fellowship come
to you. What shall wee bee merrie, shall wee haue a play extempore?
Prin.
Content, and the argument shall bee thy running away.
Falst.
A, no more of that Hal and thou louest me.
Enter hostesse
Ho.
O Iesu, my Lord the prince!
Prin.
How now my lady the hostesse, what saist thou to me?
Ho.
Marry my Lo. there is a noble man of the court at doore
would speake with you: he saies he commes from your father.
Prin.
Giue him as much as will make him a royall man, and
send him backe againe to my mother.
Falst.
What maner of man is he?
Host.
An olde man.
Falst.
What doth grauitie out of his bed at midnight? Shall I
giue him his answere?
Prin.
Preethe do iacke.
Fa.
Faith and ile send him packing.
Exit.
Prin.
Now sirs, birlady you fought faire, so did you Peto, so
did you Bardol, you are lions, to you ran away vpon instinct, you
will not touch the true prince, no fie.
Bar.
Faith I ran when I saw others runne.
-- --
Prin.
Faith tell me now in earnest, how came Falstalffs sword
so hackt?
Peto.
Why, he hackt it with his dagger, and said hee woulde
sweare truth out of England, but hee would make you beleeue
it was done in sight, and perswaded vs to do the like.
Bar.
Yea, and to tickle our noses with spearegrasse, to make
them bleed, and then to beslubber our garments with it, and
sweare it was the blood of true men. I did that I did not this seuen
yeare before, I blusht to heare his monstrous deuices.
Prin.
O villaine, thou stolest a cup of Sacke eighteene yeares
ago, and wert taken with the maner, and euer since thou hast
blusht extempore, thou hadst fire and sword on thy side, and yet
thou ranst away, what instinct hadst thou for it?
Bar.
My Lord do you see these meteors? do you behold these
exhalations?
Prin.
I do.
Bar.
What thinke you they portend?
Prin.
Hot liuers, and cold purses.
Bar.
Choler, my Lord, if rightly taken.
Enter Falstalffe.
Prin.
No if rightly taken halter. Here commes leane iacke, here
commes bare bone: how now my sweete creature of bumbast,
how long ist ago iacke since thou sawest thine owne knee?
Falst.
My owne knee, when I was about thy yeares (Hall) I was
not an Eagles talent in the waste, I could haue crept into anie
Aldermans thumbe ring: a plague of sighing and grief, it blowes
a man vp like a bladder. Thers villainous newes abroade, heere
was sir Iohn Bracy, from your father: you must to the court in
the morning. That same mad fellow of the North Percie, and
he of Wales that gaue Amamon the bastinado, and made Lucifer
cuckold, and swore the diuel his true liegeman vp&obar; the crosse
of a Welsh hooke: what a plague call you him?
Poynes.
O Glendower.
Falst.
Owen, Owen, the same, and his sonne in lawe Mortimer,
and olde Northumberland, and that sprightly Scot of
Scottes, Dowglas, that runnes a horseback vp a hill perpendicular.
Prin.
He that rides at high speede, and with his pistoll killes a
sparrow flying.
-- --
Falst.
You haue hit it.
Prin.
So did he neuer the sparrow.
Falst.
Well, that rascall hath good mettall in him, hee will not
runne.
Prin.
Why, what a rascall art thou then, to praise him so for
running?
Falst.
A horsebacke (ye cuckoe) but a foote hee will not budge
a foote.
Prin.
Yes Iacke, vpon instinct.
Falst.
I grant ye vpon instinct: well hee is there to, and one
Mordacke, and a thousand blew caps more. Worcester is stolne
away to night, thy fathers beard is turnd white with the newes,
you may buy land now as cheape as stinking Mackrel.
Prin.
Why then, it is like if there come a hote Iune, and this
ciuill buffeting hold, we shall buy maidenheads as they buy hob
nailes, by the hundreds.
Falst.
By the masse lad thou saiest true, it is like wee shall haue
good trading that way: but tell mee Hall, art not thou horrible
afearde? thou being heire apparant, could the world picke thee
out three such enemies againe? as that fiend Dowglas, that spirit
Percy, and that diuel Glendower, art thou not horribly afraid?
doth not thy bloud thril at it?
Prin.
Not a whit ifaith, I lacke some of thy instinct.
Falst.
Well thou wilt bee horriblie chidde to morrowe when
thou commest to thy father, if thou loue mee practise an aunswere.
Prin.
Do thou stand for my father and examine me vpon the
particulars of my life.
Falst.
Shall I: content. This chaire shall be my state, this dagger
my scepter, and this cushion my crowne.
Prin.
Thy state is taken for a ioynd stoole, thy golden scepter
for a leaden dagger, and thy precious rich crowne for a pittifull
bald crowne.
Falst.
Well, and the fire of grace bee not quite out of thee
nowe shalt thou be mooued. Giue me a cup of Sacke to make
my eyes looke redde, that it maie bee thought I haue wept,
for I must speake in passion, and I will doe it in king Cambises
vaine.
-- --
Prince.
Well, here is my leg.
Falst.
And here is my speech; stand aside Nobilitie.
Host.
O Iesu, this is excellent sport ifaith.
Falst.
Weepe not sweet Queene, for trickling teares are vain.
Host.
O the father, how he holds his countenance?
Fal.
For Gods sake Lords, conuay my trustfull Queene,
For teares do stop the floudgates of her eyes.
Host.
O Iesu, he doth it as like one of these harlotrie plaiers as
euer I see.
Falst.
Peace good pint-pot peace good tickle braine.
Harrie, I doe not onelie maruaile where thou spendest thy
time, but also how thou art accompanied. For though the cammomill,
the more it is troden on, the faster it growes: so youth
the more it is wasted, the sooner it weares: that thou art my son
I haue partly thy mothers worde, partlie my owne opinion, but
chieflie a villainous tricke of thine eye, and a foolish hanging
of thy neather lippe, that dooth warrant me. If then thou bee
sonne to mee, heere lies the poynt, why beeing sonne to me, art
thou so pointed at? shal the blessed sunne of heauen proue a micher,
and eat black-berries? a question not to be askt. Shall the
sonne of England proue a theefe, and take purses? a question to
be askt. There is a thing Harry, which thou hast often heard of,
and it is knowne to many in our land by the name of pitch. This
pitch (as ancient writers do report) doth defile, so doth the companie
thou keepest: for Harrie now, I do not speake to thee in
drinke, but in teares; not in pleasure but in passion: not in words
onely, but in woes also: and yet there is a vertuous man, whom
I haue often noted in thy companie, but I know not his name.
Prin.
What mauer of man and it like your Maiestie?
Fal.
A goodly portly man ifayth, and a corpulent of a cheerful
looke, a pleasing eie, and a most noble cariage, and as I thinke
his age some fiftie, or birladie inclining to threescore, and nowe
I remember me, his name is Falstalffe, if that man shoulde bee
lewdly giuen, hee deceiueth me. For Harry, I see vertue in his
lookes: if then the tree may bee knowne by the fruit, as the fruit
by the tree, then peremptorily I speake it, there is vertue in that
Falstalffe, him keepe with, the rest banish, and tell me now thou
naughtie varlet, tell me where hast thou beene this month?
-- --
Prin.
Dost thou speake like a king, do thou stand for me, and
ile play my father.
Fal.
Depose me, if thou dost it halfe so grauely, so maiestically,
both in word and matter, hang me vp by the heeles for a rabbet
sucker, or a poulters Hare
Prin.
Well, here I am set.
Fal.
And here I stand, iudge my maisters.
Prin.
Now Harry, whence come you?
Fal.
My noble Lord from Eastcheape.
Prin.
The complaints I heare of thee are greeuous.
Fal.
Zbloud my Lord they are false: nay ile tickle ye for a yong
prince I faith.
Prin.
Swearest thou vngratious boy, hence forth nere looke
on me, thou art violently carried awaie from grace, there is a diuell
haunts thee in the likenesse of an olde fat man, a tun of man
is thy companion: why doest thou conuerse with that trunke of
humours, that boultinghutch of beastlinesse, that swolne parcell
of dropsies that huge bombard of sacke, that stuft cloakebag of
guts, that rosted Manningtre Oxe with the pudding in his belly,
that reuerent vice, that gray iniquity, that father ruffian, that vanity
in yeares, wherein is he good, but to tast sacke and drinke it?
wherein neat and clenly, but to carue a capon and eat it? wherein
cunning, but in craft? wherein crafty, but in villany? wherein villanous,
but in al things? where in worthy but in nothing?
Fal.
I would your grace would take me with you, whome
meanes your grace?
Prin.
That villanous abhominable misleader of youth, Falstalffe,
that olde white bearded Sathan.
Fal.
My Lord, the man I know.
Prin.
I know thou doest.
Fal.
But to say I knowe more harme in him then in my selfe,
were to say more then I know: that he is olde the more the pittie,
his white haires doe witnesse it, but that he is sauing your reuerence,
a whoremaster, that I vtterlie denie: if sacke and sugar
be a fault, God helpe the wicked; if to be olde and merry be a sin,
then many an old host that I know is damnd: if to be fat be to be
hated, then Pharaos lane kine are to be loued No my good lord
banish Peto, banish Bardoll, banish Poines, but for sweet Iacke
-- --
Falstalffe, kinde Iacke Falstalffe, true Iacke Falstalffe, valiant
Iacke Falstalffe & therfore more valiant being as he is old Iacke
Falstalffe, banish not him thy Harries companie, banish not
him thy Harries companie, banish plumpe Iacke, and banish all
the world.
Prin.
I do, I will.
Enter Bardoll running.
Bar.
O my Lord, my Lord, the Sheriffe with a most monstrous
watch is at the doore.
Falst.
Out ye rogue, play out the play, I haue much to say in
the behalfe of that Falstalffe.
Enter the hostesse.
Host.
O Iesu, my Lord, my Lord!
Prin.
Heigh, heigh, the Deuil rides vpon a fiddle sticke, whats
the matter?
Host.
The Sheriffe and al the watch are at the doore, they are
come to search the house, shall I let them in?
Falst.
Doest thou heare Hal? neuer call a true piece of golde a
counterfet, thou art essentially made without seeming so.
Prin.
And thou a naturall coward without instinct.
Falst.
I deny your Maior, if you wil deny the Sheriffe so, if not,
let him enter. If I become not a Cart as well as another man, a
plague on my bringing vp, I hope I shall as soone bee strangled
with a halter as another.
Prin.
Go hide thee behind the Arras, the rest walke vp aboue,
now my masters for a true face, and good conscience.
Falst.
Both which I haue had, but their date is out, and therefore
ile hide me.
Prin.
Call in the Sheriffe.
Enter Sheriffe and the Carrier.
Prin.
Now master Sheriffe, what is your wil with me?
Sher.
First pardon me my Lord. A hue and crie hath followed
certaine men vnto this house.
Prin.
What men?
Sher.
One of them is well known my gratious Lorde, a grosse
fat man.
Car.
As fat as butter.
[Second section]
Prin.
The man I do assure you is not here,
For I my selfe at this time haue emploid him:
-- --
And Sheriffe, I will ingage my word to thee,
That I will by to morrow dinner time
Send him to answere thee or any man,
For any thing he shall be charg'd withal,
And so let me intreat you leaue the house.
Sher.
I will my Lord: there are two gentlemen
Haue in this robbery lost 300. markes.
Prin.
It may be so: if he haue robd these men
He shal be answerable, and so farewell.
She.
God night my noble Lord.
Prin.
I thinke it is god morrow is it not?
She.
Indeed my Lord I thinke it be two a clocke.
Exit
Prin.
This oylie rascall is knowne as well as Poules: goe call
him forth.
Peto.
Falstalffe: fast a sleepe behind the Arras, and snorting
like a horse.
Prin.
Harke how hard he fetches breath, search his pockets.
He searcheth his pocket, and findeth certaine papers.
Pr.
What hast thou found?
Pet.
Nothing but papers my Lord.
Prin.
Lets see what they be, read them.
Item a capon. 2. s, ii, d.
Item sawce. iiij, d.
Item sacke two gallons. v. s, viij, d.
Item anchaues and sacke after supper. 2, s, vj, d.
Item bread. ob.
O monstrous! but one halfepeniworth of bread to this intollerable
deale of sack? what there is else keepe close, weel read it at
more aduantage; there let him sleepe till day, ile to the court in
the morning. We must all to the wars, and thy place shal be honorable.
Ile procure this fat rogue a charge of foot, and I know
his death will bee a march of twelue skore, the money shall bee
paid backe againe with aduantage; bee with me betimes in the
morning, and so good morrow Peto.
Peto
Good morrow good my Lord.
Exeunt
Enter Hotspur, Worcester, Lord Mortimer, Owen Glendower.
Mor.
These promises are faire, the parties sure,
-- --
And our induction ful of prosperous hope.
Hot.
Lord Mortimer, and coosen Glendower wil you sit down?
and Vncle Worcester; a plague vpon it I haue forgot the map.
Glendow.
No here it is; sit Coosen Percy, sit good Coosen
Hotspur, for by that name as oft as Lancaster doth speake of you,
his cheeke lookes pale, and with a rising sigh hee wisheth you in
heauen.
Hot.
And you in hell, as oft as he heares Owen Glendower
spoke of.
Glen.
I cannot blame him; at my natiuity
The front of heauen was full of fiery shapes
Of burning cressets, and at my birth
The frame and huge foundation of the earth
Shaked like a coward.
Hot.
Why so it woulde haue done at the same season if your
mothers cat had but kittend, though your selfe had neuer beene
borne.
Glen,
I say the earth did shake when I was borne.
Hot.
And I say the earth was not of my mind,
If you suppose as fearing you it shooke.
Glen.
The heauens were all on fire, the earth did tremble,
Hot.
Oh then the earth shooke to see the heauens on fire,
And not in feare of your natiuity,
Diseased nature oftentimes breakes forth,
In strange eruptions, oft the teeming earth
Is with a kind of collicke pincht and vext,
By the imprisoning of vnruly wind
Within her vvombe, vvhich for enlargement striuing
Shakes the old Beldame earth, and topples down
Steeples and mossegrovvn towers. At your birth
Our Grandam earth, hauing this distemprature
Jn passion shooke.
Glen.
Coosen of many men
I do not beare these crossings, giue me leaue
To tell you once againe that at my birth
The front of heauen vvas full of fiery shapes,
The goates ran from the mountaines, and the heards
Were strangely clamorous to the frighted fields.
-- --
These signes haue markt me extraordinary,
And all the courses of my life do shew
I am not in the roule of commen men:
Where is he liuing clipt in with the sea,
That chides the bancks of England, Scotland, Wales,
Which cals me pupil or hath read to me?
And bring him out that is but womans sonne?
Can trace me in the tedious waies of Arte,
And hold me pace in deepe experiments.
Hot.
I thinke theres no man speakes better Welsh:
Ile to dinner.
Mor.
Peace coosen Percy, you wil make him mad.
Glen.
I can cal spirits from the vasty deepe.
Hot.
Why so can I, or so can any man,
But wil they come when you do cal for them
Glen.
Why I can teach you coosen to command the Deuil.
Hot.
And I can teach thee coose to shame the deuil,
By telling truth. Tel truth and shame the deuil:
If thou haue power to raise him bring him hither,
And ile be sworne I haue power to shame him hence:
Oh while you liue tel truth and shame the deuil.
Mor.
Come, come, no more of this vnprofitable chat.
Glen.
Three times hath Henry Bullenbrooke made head
Against my power, thrice from the bankes of Wye,
And sandy bottomd Seuerne haue I sent him
Booteles home, and weather beaten backe.
Hot.
Home without bootes, and in foule weather too,
How scapes he agues in the deuils name?
Glen.
Come here is the map, shal we diuide our right?
According to our three fold order tane.
Mor.
The Archdeacon hath diuided it
Into three limits very equally:
England from Trent, and Seuerne hitherto,
By South and East is to my part assignd:
Al westward, Wales beyond the Seuerne shore,
And al the fertile land within that bound
To Owen Glendower: and deare coose to you
The remnant Northward lying off from Trent,
-- --
And our indentures tripartite are drawn,
Which being sealed enterchangeably,
(A businesse that this night may execute:)
To morrow coosen Percy you and I
And my good Lord of Worcester wil set forth
To meet your father and the Scottish power,
As is appointed vs at Shrewsbury.
My father Glendower is not ready yet,
Nor shal we need his helpe these fourteen daies,
Within that space you may haue drawne together
Your tenants, friends, and neighbouring gentlemen.
Glen.
A shorter time shall send me to you Lords,
And in my conduct shall your Ladies come,
From whom you now must steale and take no leaue,
For there wil be a world of water shed,
Vpon the parting of your wiues and you.
Hot.
Me thinks my moity North from Burton here,
In quantity equals not one of yours,
See how this riuer comes me cranking in,
And cuts me from the best of all my land,
A huge halfe moone, a monstrous scantle out,
Ile haue the currant in this place damnd vp,
And here the smug and siluer Trent shall run
In a new channell faire and euenly,
It shall not wind with such a deepe indent,
To rob me of so rich a bottome here.
Glen.
Not wind it shal, it must, you see it doth.
Mor.
Yea, but marke howe he beares his course, and runs mee
vp with like aduantage on the other side, gelding the opposed
continent as much as on the other side it takes from you.
Wor.
Yea but a little charge wil trench him here,
And on this Northside win this cape of land,
And then he runs straight and euen.
Hot.
Ile haue it so, a little charge will do it.
Glen.
Ile not haue it altred.
Hot.
Will not you?
Glen.
No, nor you shall not.
Hot.
Who shall say me nay?
-- --
Glen.
Why that will I.
Hot.
Let me not vnderstand you then, speake it in Welsh.
Glen.
I can speake English Lord as well as you,
For I was traind vp in the English court,
Where being but yong I framed to the harpe
Many an English ditty louely well,
And gaue the tongue a helpeful ornament,
A vertue that was neuer seene in you.
Hot.
Marry and I am glad of it with all my hart,
I had rather be a kitten and cry mew,
Then one of these same miter ballet mongers,
I had rather heare a brazen cansticke turnd,
Or a drie wheele grate on the exle tree,
And that would set my teeth nothing an edge,
Nothing so much as minsing poetry,
Tis like the forc't gate of a shuffling nag.
Glen.
Come, you shal haue Trent turnd.
Hot.
I do not care, ile giue thrice so much land
To any well deseruing friend:
But in the way of bargaine marke ye me,
Ile cauill on the ninth part of a haire,
Are the Indentures drawn, shal we be gone?
Glen.
The moon shines faire, you may away by night
Ile haste the writer, and withal
Breake with your, wiues of your departure hence,
I am afraid my daughter will run mad,
So much she doteth on her Mortimer.
Exit
Mor.
Fie coosen Percy, how you crosse my father.
Hot.
I cannot chuse, sometime he angers me
With telling me of the Moldwarp and the Ant,
Of the dreamer Merlin and his prophecies,
And of a Dragon and a finles fish,
A clipwingd Griffin and a molten rauen,
A couching Leon and a ramping Cat,
And such a deale of skimble scamble stuffe,
As puts me from my faith. I tel you what,
He held me last night at least nine houres
In reckoning vp the seueral Diuels names
-- --
That were his lackies, I cried hum, and wel go to,
But markt him not a word O he is as tedious
As a tyred horse, a railing wife,
Worse then a smoky house. I had rather liue
With cheese and garlike in a Windmil far,
Then feed on cates and haue him talke to me,
In any summer house in Christendome.
Mor.
In faith he is a worthy gentleman,
Exceedingly well read and profited
In strange concealements, valiant as a lion,
And wondrous affable; and as bountifull
As mines of India; shal I tell you coosen,
He holds your temper in a high respect
And curbs himselfe euen of his natural scope,
When you come crosse his humor, faith he does,
I warrant you that man is not aliue
Might so haue tempted him as you haue done,
Without the tast of danger and reproofe,
But do not vse it oft, let me intreat you.
Wor.
In faith my Lord you are too wilfull blame,
And since your comming hither haue done enough
To put him quite besides his patience,
You must needes learne Lord to amend this fault,
Though sometimes it shew greatnes, courage, bloud,
And thats the dearest grace it renders you,
Yet oftentimes it doth present harsh rage,
Defect of maners, want of gouernment,
Pride, hautinesse, opinion, and disdaine,
The least of which hanting a noble man,
Looseth mens harts and leaues behind a staine
Vpon the beauty of all parts besides,
Beguiling them of commendation.
Hot.
Wel I am schoold good maners be your speed,
Here come our wiues, and let vs take our leaue.
Enter Glendower with the Ladies.
Mor.
This is the deadly spight that angers me,
My wife can speake no English, I no Welsh.
Glen.
My daughter weepes, sheele not part with you,
-- --
Sheele be a souldior to, sheele to the wars.
Mor.
Good father tell her, that she and my Aunt Percy
Shal follow in your conduct speedily.
Glondower speakes to her in Welsh, and she answeres him in the same.
Glen.
She is desperate here,
A peeuish selfe wild harlotrie, one that no perswasion can doe
good vpon.
The Ladie speakes in Welsh.
Mor.
I vnderstand thy lookes, that prettie Welsh,
Which thou powrest downe from these swelling heauens,
I am too perfect in, and but for shame
In such a parley should I answere thee.
The Ladie againe in welsh
Mor.
I vnderstand thy kisses, and thou mine,
And thats a feeling disputation,
But I will neuer be a truant loue,
Till I haue learnt thy language, for thy tongue
Makes Welsh as sweet as ditties highly pend,
Sung by a faire Queene in a summers bowre,
With rauishing diuision to her Lure.
Glen.
Nay, if you melt, then will she run mad.
The Ladie speakes againe in Welsh.
Mor.
O I am ignorance it selfe in this.
Glen.
She bids you on the wanton rushes lay you downe,
And rest your gentle head vpon her lap,
And she will sing the song that pleaseth you,
And on your eyelids crowne the God of sleepe,
Charming your bloud with pleasing heauinesse,
Making such difference twixt wake and sleepe,
As is the difference betwixt day and night,
The houre before the heauenly harnest teeme
Begins his golden progresse in the east.
Mor.
With all my heart ile sit and heare her sing,
By that time will our booke I thinke be drawne.
Glen.
Do so, & those musitions that shal play to you,
Hang in the aire a thousand leagues from hence,
And straight they shalbe here, sit and attend.
-- --
Hot.
Come Kate, thou art perfect in lying downe,
Come quick, quick, that I may lay my head in thy lap.
La.
Go ye giddy goose.
The musicke playes.
Hot.
Now I perceiue the diuell vnderstands Welsh,
And tis no maruaile he is so humorous,
Birlady he is a good musition.
La.
Then should you be nothing but musicall,
For you are altogither gouernd by humors,
Lie still ye thiefe, and heare the Lady sing in Welsh.
Hot.
I had rather heare lady my brache howle in Irish.
La.
Wouldst thou haue thy head broken?
Hotsp.
No.
La.
Then be still.
Hotsp.
Neither, tis a womans fault.
La.
Nowe God helpe thee.
Hot.
To the Welsh Ladies bed.
La.
Whats that?
Hot.
Peace, she sings.
Here the Ladie sings a welsh song.
Hot.
Come Kate, ile haue your song too.
La.
No mine in good sooth.
Hot.
Not yours in good sooth. Hart, you sweare like a comfit-makers
wife, not you in good sooth, and as true as I liue, and as
God shall mend me, and as sure as day:
And giuest such sarcenet surety for thy oathes,
As if thou neuer walkst further then Finsbury,
Sweare me Kate like a ladie as thou art,
A good mouthfilling oath, and leaue in sooth,
And such protest of pepper ginger bread
To veluet gards, and Sunday Citizens.
Come sing.
La.
I will not sing.
Hot.
Tis the next way to turne tayler, or be redbrest teacher,
and the indentures be drawn ile away within these two houres,
and so come in when ye will.
Exit.
Glen.
Come, come, Lord Mortimer, you are as slow,
As Hot. Lord Percy is on fire to go:
-- --
By this our booke is drawne, weele but seale,
And then to horse immediatlie.
Mor.
With all my hart.
Exeunt.
Enter the King, Prince of Wales, and others.
King.
Lords giue vs leaue, the Prince of Wales and I,
Must haue some priuate conference, but be neare at hand,
For we shall presently haue neede of you.
Exeunt Lords.
I know not whether God will haue it so
For some displeasing seruice I haue done,
That in his secret doome out of my blood,
Heele breed reuengement and a scourge for me:
But thou dost in thy passages of life,
Make me beleeue that thou art onely markt
For the hot vengeance, and the rod of heauen,
To punish my mistreadings. Tell me else
Could such inordinate and low desires,
Such poore, such bare, such lewd, such mean attempts,
Such barren pleasures, rude societie
As thou art matcht withall, and grafted to,
Accompanie the greatnesse of thy blood,
And hold their leuell with thy princely heart?
Prin.
So please your Maiestie, I would I could
Quit all offences with as cleare excuse,
As well as I am doubtlesse I can purge
My selfe of many I am chargd withall,
Yet such extenuation let me beg,
As in reproofe of many tales deuisde,
Which oft the eare of greatnes needs must heare
By smiling pickthanks, and base newes mongers,
I may for some things true, wherein my youth
Hath faulty wandred, and irregular,
Find pardon on my true submission.
Kin.
God pardon on thee, yet let me wonder, Harry,
At thy affections, which do hold a wing
Quite from the flight of all thy auncestors,
Thy place in counsell thou hast rudely lost
Which by thy yonger brother is supplide,
And art almost an allien to the harts
-- --
Of all the Court and princes of my blood,
The hope and expectation of thy time
Is ruind, and the soule of euery man
Prophetically do forethinke thy fall:
Had I so lauish of my presence beene,
So common hackneid in the eyes of men,
So stale and cheape to vulgar companie,
Opinion that did helpe me to the crowne,
Had still kept loyall to possession,
And left me in reputelesse banishment,
A fellow of no marke nor likelihoode.
By being seldome seene, I could not stirre
But like a Comet I was wondred at
That men would tell their children this is he:
Others would say, where, which is Bullingbrooke?
And then I stole all curtesie from heauen,
And drest my selfe in such humilitie
That I did plucke allegiance from mens hearts,
Loud shouts, and salutations from their mouths,
Euen in the presence of the crowned king.
Thus did I keepe my person fresh and new,
My presence like a roabe pontificall,
Nere seene but wondred at, and so my state
Seldome, but sumptuous shewd like a feast,
And wan by rarenesse such solemnitie.
The skipping king, he ambled vp and downe,
With shallow iesters, and rash bauin wits,
Soone kindled, and soone burnt, carded his state,
Mingled his royaltie with capring fooles,
Had his great name prophaned with their scornes,
And gaue his countenance against his name
To laugh at gibing boyes, and stand the push
Of euery beardlesse vaine comparatiue,
Grew a companion to the common streetes,
Enfeoft himselfe to popularitie,
That being dayly swallowed by mens eyes,
They surfetted with home, and began to loath
The taste of sweetnesse, whereof a little
-- --
More then a little, is by much too much.
So when he had occasion to be seene,
He was but as the Cuckoe is in Iune,
Heard, not regarded: Seene, but with such eies
As sicke and blunted with communitie,
Affoord no extraordinary gaze.
Such as is bent on sun-like maiestie,
When it shines seldome in admiring eies,
But rather drowzd, and hung their eie-lids down,
Slept in his face, and rendred such aspect
As cloudy men vse to their aduersaries,
Being with his presence glutted, gordge, and full.
And in that very line Harry standest thou,
For thou hast lost thy princely priuiledge
With vile participation. Not an eye
But is a weary of thy common sight,
Saue mine, which hath desired to see thee more,
Which now doth that I would not haue it do,
Make blind it selfe with foolish tendernesse.
Prin.
I shall hereafter my thrice gratious Lord,
Be more my selfe.
King.
For all the world,
As thou art to this houre was Richard then,
When I from France set foot at Rauenspurgh,
And euen as I was than, is Percy now,
Now by my scepter, and my soule to boote,
He hath more worthie interest to the state
Then thou the shadow of succession.
For of no right, nor colour like to right,
He doth fill fields with harnesse in the realme,
Turnes head against the lions armed iawes,
And being no more in debt to yeares, then thou
Leads ancient Lords, and reuerend Bishops on
To bloudie battailes, and to bruising armes.
What neuer dying honour hath he got
Against renowmed Dowglas? Whose high deeds,
Whose hot incursions, and great name in armes,
Holds from al souldiors chiefe maioritie
And militarie title capitall.
-- --
Through all the kingdoms that acknowledge Christ.
Thrice hath this Hotspur Mars in swathling cloaths,
This infant warrier in his enterprises,
Discomfited great Dowglas tane him once,
Enlargd him, and made a friend of him,
To fill the mouth of deepe defiance vp,
And shake the peace and safety of our throne,
And what say you to this? Percy, Northumberland,
The Archbishops grace of York, Dowglas, Mortimer,
Capitulate against vs, and are vp.
But wherefore do I tel these newes to thee?
Why Harry do I tell thee of my foes,
Which art my nearest and dearest enemy?
Thou that art like enough through vassall feare,
Base inclination, and the start of spleene,
To fight against me vnder Percies pay,
To dog his heeles, and curtsie at his frownes,
To shew how much thou art degenerate.
Prin.
Do not thinke so, you shal not find it so,
And God forgiue them that so much haue swaide
Your maiesties good thoughts away from me.
I will redeeme all this on Percies head,
And in the closing of some glorious day
Be bold to tell you that I am your sonne,
When I will weare a garment all of bloud,
And staine my fauors in a bloudy maske,
Which washt away shall scoure my shame with it,
And that shal be the day when ere it lights,
That this same child of honour and renowne,
This gallant Hotspur, this all praised knight,
And your vnthought of Harry chance to meet,
For euery honor sitting on his helme
Would they were multitudes, and on my head
My shames redoubled. For the time will com
That I shal make this Northren youth exchange
His glorious deedes for my indignities.
Percy is but my factor, good my Lord,
To engrosse vp glorious deeds on my behalfe.
-- --
And I will call him to so strickt account,
That he shall render euery glory vp,
Yea, euen the sleightest worship of his time,
Or I will teare the reckoning from his heart.
This in the name of God I promise heere,
The which if he be pleasd I shall performe:
I do beseech your maiesty may salue
The long grown wounds of my intemperance,
If not, the end of life cancels all bands,
And I will die a hundred thousand deaths
Ere breake the smallest parcell of this vow.
King.
A hundred thousand rebels die in this,
Thou shalt haue charge and soueraine trust herein.
How now good blunt thy lookes are full of speed.
Enter Blunt.
Blunt.
So hath the businesse that I come to speake of.
Lord Mortimer of Scotland hath sent word,
That Dowglas and the English Rebels met
The eleuenth of this month at Shrewsbury,
A mighty and a fearefull head they are,
If promises be kept on euery hand,
As euer offred foule play in a state.
King.
The Earle of Westmerland set forth to day,
With him my sonne Lord Iohn of Lancaster,
For this aduertisement is fiue daies old.
On Wednesday next, Harry you shall set forward,
On thursday we our selues will march. Our meeting
Is Bridgenorth, and Harry, you shall march
Through Glocestershire, by which account
Our businesse valued some twelue daies hence,
Our general forces at Bridgenorth shall meet:
Our hands are full of businesse, lets away,
Aduantage feedes him fat while men delay.
Exeunt.
Enter Falstalffe and Bardol.
Fal.
Bardoll, am I not falne away vilely since this last action?
do I not bate? do I not dwindle? Why, my skinne hangs about
me like an old Ladies loose gowne. I am withered like an oulde
apple Iohn. Well, ile repent and that suddainly, while I am in
-- --
some liking, I shall be out of heart shortly, and then I shall haue
no strength to repent. And I haue not forgotten what the inside
of a Church is made of, I am a Pepper corne, a brewers Horse,
the inside of a Church. Company, villainous company, hath been
the spoile of me.
Bar.
Sir Iohn, you are so fretfull you cannot liue long.
Fal.
Why, there is it; come sing me a bawdie song, make me
merry. I was as vertuously giuen as a gentleman need to be, vertuous
enough, swore little, dic't not aboue seuen times a weeke,
went to a baudy house not aboue once in a quarter of an houre,
paid money that I borrowed three or foure times, liued wel, and
in good compasse, and nowe I liue out of all order, out of all
compasse.
Bar.
Why, you are so fat, sir Iohn, that you must needes be out
of all compasse: out of all reasonable compasse, sir Iohn.
Fal.
Do thou amend thy face, and ile amend my life: thou art
our Admiral, thou bearest the lanterne in the poope, but tis in the
nose of thee: thou art the knight of the burning lampe.
Bar.
Why, sir Iohn, my face does you no harme.
Fal.
No ile be sworn, I make as good vse of it as many a man
doth of a deaths head, or a memento mori, I neuer see thy face,
but I thinke vpon hell fire, and Diues that liued in Purple: for
there he is in his robes burning, burning. If thou wert any waie
giuen to vertue, I would sweare by thy face: my oath should be
by this fire that Gods Angell. But thou art altogether giuen ouer:
and wert indeede but for the light in thy face, the sonne of
vtter darkenesse. When thou ranst vp Gadshill in the night to
catch my horse, if I did not thinke thou hadst beene an ignis fatuus,
or a ball of wildfire, theres no purchase in money. O thou
art a perpetuall triumph, an euerlasting bonefire light, thou hast
saued me a thousand Markes in Linkes, and Torches, walking
with thee in the night betwixt tauerne and tauerne: but the sacke
that thou hast drunke me, would haue bought me lights as good
cheape, at the dearest Chandlers in Europe. I haue maintained
that Sallamander of yours with fire any time this two and thirty
yeares, God reward me for it.
Bar.
Zbloud, I would my face were in your belly.
Fal.
Godamercy, so should I be sure to be hartburnt.
-- --
How now dame Partlet the hen, haue you enquird
Enter host.
yet who pickt my pocket?
Hostesse.
Why sir Iohn, what do you thinke sir Iohn, doe you
thinke I keepe theeues in my house, I haue searcht, I haue enquired,
so has my husband, man by man, boy by boy, seruant by
seruant, the tight of a haire, was neuer lost in my house before.
Fal.
Yee lie Hostesse, Bardoll was shau'd, and lost manie a
haire, and ile be sworne my pocket was pickt: go to, you are a
woman, go.
Ho.
Who I No, I defie thee: Gods light I was neuer cald so in
mine owne house before.
Fal.
Go to. I know you well inough.
Ho.
No, sir Iohn you do not know me, sir Iohn, I knowe you
sir Iohn, you owe me mony sir Iohn, and now you picke a quarrell
to beguile me of it, I bought you a douzen of shirts to your
backe.
Falst.
Doulas, filthie Doulas. I haue giuen them away to Bakers
wiues, they haue made boulters of them.
Host.
Now as I am a true woman, holland of viii s. an ell, you
owe mony here, besides sir Iohn, for your diet, and by drinkings,
and money lent you xxiiii. pound.
Falst.
He had his part of it, let him pay.
Host.
He, alas he is poore, he hath nothing.
Fal.
How? poore? looke vpon his face. What call you rich? let
them coyne his nose, let them coyne his cheekes, ile not pay a
denyer: what will you make a yonker of mee? shall I not take
mine ease in mine Inne, but I shall haue my pocket pickt? I haue
lost a seale ring of my grandfathers worth fortie marke.
Ho.
O Iesu, I haue heard the Prince tell him I know not how
oft, that that ring was copper.
Falst.
How? the prince is a iacke, a sneakeup, Zbloud and hee
were here, I would cudgell him like a dog if he would say so.
Enter the prince marching, and Falstalffe meetes him playing vpon his trunchion like a fife.
Falst.
How now lad, is the winde in that doore ifaith, must we
all march?
Bar.
Yea, two, and two, Newgate fashion.
Host.
My Lord, I pray you heare me.
-- --
Pr.
What saist thou mistris quickly, how doth thy husband?
I loue him well, he is an honest man.
Host.
Good my Lord heare me?
Falst.
Preethe let her alone, and list to me.
Prin.
What saist thou iacke.
Falst.
The other night I fel a sleepe here, behind the Arras, and
had my pocket pickt, this house is turn'd baudy house, they pick
pockets.
Prin.
What didst thou loose iacke?
Fal.
Wilt thou beleeue me Hall, three or foure bonds of forty
pound a peece, and a seale ring of my grandfathers.
Prin.
A trifle, some eight penie matter.
Host.
So I told him my Lord, and I said I heard your grace say
so: & my lord he speakes most vilely of you, like a foule mouthd
man as he is, and said he would cudgel you.
Prin.
What he did not?
Ho.
Theres neither faith, truth, nor womanhood in me else.
Fal.
Theres no more faith in thee then in a stued prune, nor
no more truth in thee then in a drawn fox, and for womandood
maid marion may be the deputies wife of the ward to thee. Go
you thing, go.
Host.
Say what thing, what thing?
Fal.
What thing? why a thing to thanke God on.
Ho.
I am nothing to thanke God on, I would thou shouldst
know it, I am an honest mans wife, and setting thy knighthood
aside, thou art a knaue to call me so.
Fal.
Setting thy womanhood aside, thou art a beast to say otherwise.
Host.
Say, what beast, thou knaue thou?
Falst.
What beast? why an Otter.
Prin.
An Otter sir Iohn, why an Otter?
Falst.
Why? shees neither fish nor flesh, a man knowes not
where to haue her.
Host.
Thou art an vniust man in saying so, thou or anie man
knowes where to haue me, thou knaue thou.
Prin.
Thou saist true hostesse, and hee slaunders thee most
grossely.
Host.
So hee doth you my Lord, and saide this other day you
-- --
ought him a thousand pound.
Prin.
Sirrha, do I owe you a thousand pound?
Falst.
A thousand pound Hall? a million, thy loue is worth a
million, thou owest me thy loue.
Host.
Nay my Lord, he cald you iacke, and saide hee woulde
cudgel you.
Falst.
Did I Bardol?
Bar.
Indeed sir Iohn you said so.
Fal.
Yea, if he said my ring was copper.
Prin.
I say tis copper, darest thou be as good as thy word now?
Falst.
Why Hall? Thou knowest as thou art but man I dare,
but as thou art prince, I feare thee as I feare the roaring of the
Lyons whelpe.
Prin.
And why not as the Lyon?
Fal.
The king himselfe is to be feared as the Lion, doest thou
thinke ile feare thee as I feare thy father? nay and I doo, I pray
God my girdle breake.
Prin.
O, if it should, howe woulde thy guts fall about thy
knees? but sirrha, theres no roome for faith, trueth, nor honestie,
in this bosome of thine. It is all fild vp with guttes and midriffe.
Charge an honest woman with picking thy pocket, why
thou horeson impudent imbost rascall, if there were anie thing
in thy pocket but tauerne reckonings, memorandums of baudie
houses, and one poore peniworth of sugar-candie to make thee
long winded, if thy pocket were inricht with any other iniuries
but these; I am a villain, and yet you will stand to it, you will not
pocket vp wrong, art thou not ashamed?
Fal.
Doest thou heare Hall, thou knowest in the state of innocencie
Adam fell, & what should poore iacke Falstalfe do in the
daies of villanie? thou seest I haue more flesh then another man,
& therfore more frailty. You confesse then you pickt my pocket.
Prin.
It appeares so by the storie.
Fal.
Hostesse, I forgiue thee, go make ready breakfast, loue thy
husband, looke to thy seruaunts, cherish thy ghesse, thou shalt
find me tractable to any honest reason, thou seest I am pacified
still, nay preethe be gone.
Exit Hostesse
Now Hal, to the newes at court for the robbery lad, how is that
answered?
-- --
Prin.
O my sweet beoffe, I must still bee good angel to thee,
the mony is paid backe againe.
Fal.
O I do not like that paying backe, tis a double labor.
Prin.
I am good friends with my father and may do any thing
Fal.
Rob me the exchequer the first thing thou doest, and doe
it with vnwasht hands too.
Bar.
Do my Lord.
Prin
I Haue procured thee Iacke a charge of foot.
Fal.
I would it had been of horse. Where shall I finde one that
can steale well. O for a fine thiefe of the age of xxii. or thereabouts:
I am hainously vnprouided. Well, God be thanked for
these rebels, they offende none but the vertuous; I laude them, I
praise them.
Prin.
Bardoll.
Bar.
My Lord.
Prin.
Go beare this letter to Lord Iohn of Lancaster,
To my brother Iohn, this to my lord of Westmerland.
Go Peto to horse, to horse, for thou and I
Haue thirty miles to ride yet ere dinner time,
Iacke, meete me to morrow in the temple haule
At two of clocke in the afternoone,
There shalt thou know thy charge, and there receiue
Money and order for their furniture,
The land is burning, Percy stands on high,
And either we or they must lower lie,
Fal.
Rare words, braue world hostesse, my breakfast come,
Oh I could wish this tauerne were my drum.
Per.
Wel said my noble Scot, if speaking truth
In this fine age were not thought flattery,
Such attribution should the Douglas haue,
As not a souldior of this seasons stampe,
Should go so generall currant through the world
By God, I cannot flatter, I do defie
The tongues of soothers, but a brauer place
In my harts loue hath no man then your selfe,
Nay taske me to my word, approue me Lord.
Doug.
Thou art the King of honor,
No man so potent breaths vpon the ground,
But I will beard him.
Enter one with letters.
-- --
Per.
Do so, and tis wel. What letters hast thou there?
I can but thanke you.
Mes.
These letters come from your father.
Per.
Letters from him, why comes he not himselfe?
Mes.
He cannot come my lord he is grieuous sicke.
Per.
Zounds, how has he the leisure to be sicke
In such a iustling time, who leads his power?
Vnder whose gouernment come they along?
Mes.
His letters beares his mind, not I my mind.
Wor.
I preethe tel me, doth he keepe his bed?
Mes.
He did my Lord, foure daies ere I set forth,
And at the time of my departure thence,
He was much fearde by his Phisitions.
Wor.
I would the state of time had first been whole,
Eare he by sicknesse had bin visited,
His health was neuer better worth then now.
Per.
Sicke now, droupe now, this sicknes doth infect
The very life bloud of our enterprise,
Tis catching hither euen to our campe,
He writes me here that inward sicknesse,
And that his friends by deputation
Could not so soone be drawn, nor did he thinke it meet
To lay so dangerous and deare a trust
On any soule remoou'd but on his own,
Yet doth he giue vs bold aduertisement,
That with our small coniunction we should on,
To see how fortune is disposd to vs,
For as he writes there is no quailing now,
Because the king is certainly possest
Of al our purposes, what say you to it?
Wor.
Your fathers sicknesse is a maime to vs.
Per.
A perillous gash, a very limbe lopt off,
And yet in faith it is not, his present want
Seemes more then we shal find it: were it good
To set the exact wealth of al our states
Al at one cast? to set so rich a maine
On the nice hazard of one doubtfull houre?
It were not good for therein should we read
-- --
The very bottome and the soule of hope,
The very list, the very vtmost bound
Of all our fortunes.
Doug.
Faith, and so we should,
Where now remaines a sweet reuersion,
We may boldly spend vpon the hope of what tis to come in,
A comfort of retirement liues in this.
Per.
A randeuous, a home to flie vnto
If that the Diuel and mischance looke big
Vpon the maidenhead of our affaires.
Wor.
But yet I would your father had bin heere:
The quality and haire of our attempt
Brookes no deuision, it will be thought
By some that know not why he is away,
That wisedome, loialty, and meere dislike
Of our proceedings kept the Earle from hence,
And thinke how such an apprehension
May turne the tide of fearefull faction,
And breed a kind of question in our cause:
For wel you know we of the offring side
Must keepe aloofe from strict arbitrement,
And stop al sight-holes euery loope from whence
The eie of reason may prie in vpon vs,
This absence of your fathers drawes a curtain
That shewes the ignorant a kind of feare
Before not dreamt of.
Per.
You stra ne too far.
I rather of his absence make this vse,
It lends a lustre and more great opinion,
A larger dare to our great enterprise
Then if the Earle were here, for men must thinke
If we without his helpe can make a head
To push against a kingdome, with his helpe
We shal oreturne it topsie turuy down,
Yet all goes well yet all our ioints are whole.
Doug.
As hart can thinke, there is not such a word
Spoke of in Scotland as this tearme of feare.
Enter sir Ri: Vernon.
-- --
Per.
My coosen Vernon, welcom by my soule.
Ver.
Pray God my newes be worth a welcome lord,
The Earle of Westmerland seuen thousand strong
Is marching hetherwards, with him prince Iohn.
Per.
No harme, what more?
Ver.
And further I haue learnd,
The King himselfe in person is set forth,
Or hetherwards intended speedily
With strong and mighty preparation.
Hot.
He shal be welcome too: where is his sonne?
The nimble footed madcap prince of Wales,
And his Cumrades that daft the world aside
And bid it passe?
Ver.
All furnisht al in Armes:
All plumde like Estridges that with the wind
Baited like Eagles hauing lately bathd,
Glittering in golden coates like images,
As ful of spirit as the month of May,
And gorgeous as the sunne at Midsomer:
Wanton as youthful goates wild as young buls,
I saw yong Harry with his beuer on,
His cushes on his thighs gallantly armde,
Rise from the ground like feathered Mercury,
And vaulted with such ease into his seat,
As if an Angel drop down from the clouds,
To turne and wind a fiery Pegasus,
And witch the world with noble horsemanship.
Hot.
No more, no more, worse then the sun in March,
This praise doth nourish agues, let them come,
They come like sacrifices in their trim,
And to the fire-eyd maide of smoky war,
Al hot and bleeding will we offer them,
The mailed Mars shal on his altars sit
Vp to the eares in b oud. I am on fire
To heare this rich reprizal is so nigh,
And yet not ours: Come let me tast my horse,
Who is to beare me like a thunderbolt,
Against the bosome of the Prince of Wales,
-- --
Harry to Harry shal hot horse to horse,
Meete and neare part til one drop down a coarse,
Oh that Glendower were come.
Ver.
There is more newes,
I learnd in Worcester as I rode along,
He can draw his power this fourteene daies.
Doug.
Thats the worst tidings that I heare of it.
Wor.
I by my faith, that beares a frosty sound.
Hot.
What may the kings whole battel reach vnto?
Ver.
To thirty thousand.
Hot.
Forty let it be,
My father and Glendower being both away,
The powers of vs may serue so great a day,
Come let vs take a muster speedily,
Doomes day is neare, die all, die merely.
Doug.
Talke not of dying, I am out of feare
Of death or deaths hand for this one halfe yeare.
Exeunt
Enter Falstalffe Bardoll.
Falst.
Bardol get thee before the Couentry, fill me a bottle of
Sacke, our souldiors shall march through. Weele to Sutton cophill
to night.
Bar.
Will you giue me money captaine?
Fal.
Lay out, lay out.
Bar.
This bottell makes an angel.
Fal.
And if it do, take it for thy labour, and if it make twenty
take them all, ile answere the coynage, bid my Liuetenant Peto
meet me at townes end.
Bar.
I will captaine, farewell.
Exit
Fal.
If I be not ashamed of my soldiours, I am a souct gurnet,
I haue misused the kinges presse damnablie. I haue got in exchange
of 150. soldiours 300. and odde poundes. I presse me
none but good houshoulders, Yeomans sonnes, inquire me out
contracted batchelers, such as had been askt twice on the banes,
such a commodity of warme slaues, as had as lieue heare the
Diuell as a drumme, such as feare the report of a Caliuer, worse
then a strucke foule, or a hurt wild ducke: I prest mee none but
such tostes and butter with hearts in their bellies no bigger then
pinnes heades, and they haue bought out their seruices, and
-- --
now my whole charge consists of Ancients, Corporals, Lieutenants,
gentlemen of companies: slaues as ragged as Lazarus in
the painted cloth, where the gluttons dogs licked his sores, and
such as indeed were neuer souldiours, but discarded, vniust seruingmen,
yonger sonnes to yonger brothers, reuolted tapsters,
and Ostlers, trade falne, the cankers of a calme world, and a long
peace, ten times more dishonourable ragged then an olde fazd
ancient, and such haue I to fill vp the roomes of them as haue
bought out their seruices, that you woulde thinke that I had a
hundred and fiftie tottered prodigals, latelie come from swine
keeping, from eating draffe and husks. A mad fellowe met mee
on the way, and tolde mee I had vnloaded all the Gibbets, and
prest the dead bodies. No eye hath seene such skarcrowes. Ile
not march through Couentry with them, thats flat: nay, and
the villains march wide betwixt the legs as if they had giues on,
for indeede I had the most of them out of prison, theres not a
shert and a halfe in all my companie, and the halfe shert is two
napkins tackt togither, and throwne ouer the shoulders like a
Heralds coate without sleeues, and the shert to say the trueth
stolne from my host at S. Albones, or the red-nose Inkeeper of
Dauintry, but thats all one, theile find linnen inough on euerie
hedge.
Enter the Prince, Lord of Westmerland.
Prin.
How now blowne iacke? how now quilt?
Fal.
What Hal, how now mad wag? what a diuel dost thou in
Warwickshire? My good Lo. of Westmerland, I cry you mercy,
I thought your honour had alreadie bin at shrewesburie.
West.
Faith sir Iohn tis more then time that I were there, and
you too but my powers are there already, the king I can tel you
lookes for vs all, we must away all night.
Falst.
Tut neuer feare mee, I am as vigilant as a Cat to steale
Creame.
Prin.
I thinke to steale Creame indeed, for thy theft hath alreadie
made thee butter, but tell me iacke, whose fellowes are
these that come after?
Falst.
Mine Hall, mine.
Prince.
I did neuer see such pitifull rascals.
Falst.
Tut, tut, good inough to tosse, foode for powder, foode
-- --
for powder, theile fill a pit as well as better; tush man, mortall
men, mortal men.
West.
I but sir Iohn, me thinkes they are exceeding poore and
bare too beggerly.
Falst.
Faith for their pouerty I know not where they had that,
and for their barenesse I am sure they neuer learnd that of me.
Prin.
No ile be sworne, vnlesse you call three fingers in the ribs
bare, but sirrha make haste, Percy is already in the field.
Exit.
Fal.
What is the king incampt?
West.
He is sir Iohn I feare we shal stay too long.
Fal.
Wel, to the latter end of a fray, and the beginning of a feast
fits a dul fighter and a kene guest.
Exeunt.
Enter Hotspur, Worcester, Doug: Vernon.
Hot.
Weele fight with him to night.
Wor.
It may not be.
Doug.
You giue him then aduantage.
Ver.
Not a whit.
Hot.
Why say you so, lookes he not for supply?
Uer.
So do we.
Hot.
His is certaine, ours is doubtful.
Wor.
Good coosen be aduisd, stir not to night.
Uer.
Do not my Lord.
Doug.
You do not counsel wel,
You speake it out of feare, and cold hart.
Uer.
Do me no slander Douglas, by my life,
And I dare well maintaine it with my life,
If well respected honor bid me on,
I hould as little counsell with weake feare,
As you my Lord, or any Scot that this day liues,
Let it be scene to morrow in the battell which of vs feares.
Doug
Yea or to night,
Ver.
Content.
Hot.
To night say I.
Uer.
Come, come, it may not be.
I wonder much being men of such great leading as you are,
That you foresee not what impediments
Drag backe our expedition, certaine horse
Of my coosen Vernons are not yet come vp,
-- --
Your Vncle Worcesters horses came but to day,
And now their pride and mettall is a sleepe,
Their courage with hard labour tame and dull,
That not a horse is halfe the halfe of himselfe.
Hot.
So are the horses of the enemie
In generall iourney bated and brought low,
The better part of ours are full of rest.
Wor
The number of the King exceedeth our,
For Gods sake coosen stay till all come in.
The trumpet sounds a parley. Enter sir Walter Blunt.
Blunt.
I come with gracious offers from the king,
If you vouchsafe me hearing and respect.
Hot
Welcome sir Walter Blunt: and would to God
You were of our determination,
Some of vs loue you well, and euen those some
Enuy your great deseruings and good name,
Because you are not of our qualitie,
But stand against vs like an enemie.
Blunt.
And God defend but still I should stand so,
So long as out of limit and true rule
You stand against annointed Maiestie.
But to my charge. The king hath sent to know
The nature of your griefes and whereupon
You coniure from the breast of ciuill peace
Such bold hostilitie: teaching his dutious land
Audacious crueltie. If that the king
Haue any way your good deserts forgot
Which he confesseth to be manifold,
He bids you name your griefes, and with all speede,
You shall haue your desires with interest
And pardon absolute for your selfe, and these
Herein misled by your suggestion.
Hot.
The king is kind, and well we know the king
Knowes at what time to promise, when to pay:
My father, and my vncle and my selfe,
Did giue him that same royaltie he weares,
And when he was not sixe and twentie strong,
Sicke in the worlds regard: wretched and low
-- --
A poore vnminded outlaw sneaking home,
My father gaue him welcome to the shore:
And when he heard him sweare and vow to God,
He came but to be Duke of Lancaster,
To sue his liuery, and beg his peace
With teares of innocencie, and tearmes of zeale,
My father in kinde heart and pitie mou'd,
Swore him assistance, and performd it too.
Now when the Lords and Barons of the realme,
Perceiu'd Northumberland did leane to him,
The more and lesse came in with cap and knee,
Met him in Borroughs, Cities, Villages,
Attended him on bridges, stoode in lanes,
Laid gifts before him, profferd him their oathes,
Gaue him their heires, as Pages followed him,
Euen at the heeles, in golden multitudes,
He presently, as greatnesse knowes it selfe,
Steps me a little higher then his vow
Made to my father while his blood was poore
Vpon the naked shore at Rauenspurgh,
And now forsooth takes on him to reforme
Some certaine edicts, and some streight decrees,
That lie too heauie on the Common-wealth,
Cries out vpon abuses, seemes to weepe
Ouer his Countrey wrongs, and by this face
This seeming brow of iustice did he winne
The hearts of all that he did angle for:
Proceeded further, cut me off the heads
Of all the fauourits that the absent king
In deputation left behind him here,
When he was personall in the Irish warre.
Blunt.
Tut, I came not to heare this.
Hot.
Then to the poynt.
In short time after he deposd the king,
Soone after that depriu'd him of his life,
And in the necke of that taskt the whole state,
To make that woorse, suffred his kinsman March
(Who is if euerie owner were well plac'd
-- --
Indeed his king) to be ingagde in Wales,
There without raunsome to lie forfeited,
Disgrac't me in my happy victories,
Sought to intrap me by intelligence,
Rated mine vnkle from the counsell boord,
In rage dismisd my father from the Court,
Broke oath on oath, committed wrong on wrong,
And in conclusion droue vs to seeke out
This head of safetie, and withall to prie
Into his title, the which we find
Too indirect for long continuance.
Blunt.
Shall I returne this answere to the king?
Hot.
Not so sir Walter. Weele withdraw a while.
Go to the king, and let there be impawnde
Some surety for a safe returne againe,
And in the morning early shal mine vnkle
Bring him our purposes, and so farewell.
Blunt.
I would you would accept of grace and loue.
Hot.
And may be so we shall.
Blunt.
Pray God you do.
Enter Archbishop of Yorke, sir Mighell.
Arch.
Hie good sir Mighell, beare this sealed briefe
With winged haste to the Lord Marshall,
This to my coosen Scroope, and all the rest
To whom they are directed. If you knew
How much they do import you would make haste.
Sir M.
My good Lord I gesse their tenor.
Arch.
Like enough you do.
To morrow good sir Mighell is a day,
Wherein the fortune of ten thousand men
Must bide the touch. For sir at Shrewsbury
As I am truly giuen to vnderstand,
The king with mighty and quicke raised power
Meetes with Lord Harry And I feare sir Mighell
What with the sicknesse of Northumberland,
Whose power was in the first proportion,
And what with Owen Glendowers absence thence,
Who with them was a rated sinew too,
-- --
And comes not in ouerrulde by prophecies,
I feare the power of Percy is too weake
To wage an instant triall with the king.
Sir M.
Why my good Lord, you need not feare,
There is Douglas, and Lord Mortimer.
Arch.
No, Mortimer is not there.
Sir M.
But there is Mordake, Vernon, Lord Harry Percy.
And there is my Lord of Worcester, and a head
Of gallant warriours, noble gentlemen.
Arch
And so there is: but yet the king hath drawn
The speciall head of all the land togither,
The Prince of Wales, Lord Iohn of Lancaster,
The noble Westmerland, and warlike Blunt,
And many mo coriuals and deare men
Of estimation and command in armes.
Sir M.
Doubt not my Lo: they shalbe wel oppos'd.
Arch.
I hope no lesse, yet needfull tis to feare,
And to preuent the worst, sir Mighell speed:
For if Lord Percy thriue not ere the king
Dismisse his power, he meanes to visit vs,
For he hath heard of our confederacy,
And tis but wisedome to make strong against him,
Therefore make haste, I must go write againe
To other friends, and so farewell sir Mighel.
Exeunt
Enter the King, Prince of Wales, Lord Iohn of Lancaster, Earle of Westmerland, sir Walter Blunt, Falstalffe.
King.
How bloudily the sunne begins to peare
Aboue yon bulky hill, the day lookes pale
At his distemprature.
Prin.
The Southren winde
Doth play the trumpet to his purposes,
And by his hollow whistling in the leaues
Foretels a tempest and a blustring day.
Kin.
Then with the loosers let it simpathize,
For nothing can seeme foule to those that winne.
The trumpet sounds. Enter Worcester
King.
How now my Lord of Worcester, tis not wel,
That you and I should meet vpon such tearmes
-- --
As now we meete, You haue deceiu'd our trust,
And made vs doffe our easie roabes of peace,
To crush our old limbs in vngentle steele,
This is not well my Lord, this is not well.
What say you to it? will you againe vnknit
This churlish knot of all abhorred war?
And moue in that obedient orbe againe,
Where you did giue a faire and naturall light,
And be no more an exhalde meteor,
A prodigie of feare, and a portent
Of broched mischiefe to the vnborne times.
Worst.
Heare me my liege:
For mine own part I could be well content,
To entertaine the lag end of my life
With quiet houres. For I protest
I haue not sought the day of this dislike.
King.
You haue not sought it, how comes it then?
Fal.
Rebellion lay in his way, and he found it.
Prin.
Peace chewet, peace.
Wor.
It pleasd your maiesty to turne your lookes
Of fauor from my selfe, and all our house,
And yet I must remember you my Lord,
We were the first and dearest of your friends,
For you my staffe of office did I breake
In Richards time, and posted day and night
To meet you on the way, and kisse your hand,
When yet you were in place, and in account
Nothing so strong and fortunate as I.
It was my selfe, my brother and his sonne,
That brought you home, and boldly did outdare.
The dangers of the time. You swore to vs,
And you did sware that oath at Dancaster,
That you did nothing purpose gainst the state,
Nor clame no further then your new falne right,
The seat of Gaunt, Dukedom of Lancaster:
To this we swore our aide: but in short space
It rainde downe fortune showring on your head,
And such a floud of greatnesse fell on you,
-- --
What with our helpe, what with the absent king,
What with the iniuries of a wanton time,
The seeming sufferances that you had borne,
And the contrarious winds that held the king
So long in his vnlucky Irish wars,
That all in England did repute him dead:
And from this swarme of faire aduantages,
You tooke occasion to be quickly wooed
To gripe the general sway into your hand,
Forgot your oath to vs at Dancaster,
And being fed by vs, you vsd vs so
As that vngentle gull the Cuckoes bird
Vseth the sparrow, did oppresse our neast,
Grew by our feeding to so great a bulke,
That euen our loue durst not come neare your sight,
For feare of swallowing: but with nimble wing
We were inforst for safety sake to flie
Out of your sight, and raise this present head,
Whereby we stand opposed by such meanes,
As you your selfe haue forgde against your selfe
By vnkind vsage, daungerous countenance,
And violation of all faith and troth,
Sworne to vs in your yonger enterprize.
King.
These things indeed you haue articulate,
Proclaimd at market Crosses, read in Churches,
To face the garment of rebellion
With some fine colour that may please the eye
Of fickle changlings and poore discontents,
Which gape and rub the elbow at the newes
Of hurly burly innouation,
And neuer yet did insurrection want
Such water colors to impaint his cause
Nor moody beggars staruing for a time,
Of pell mell hauocke and confusion.
Prin.
In both your armies there is many a soule,
Shall pay full dearely for this incounter
If once they ioine in trial, tell your nephew
The prince of Wales doth ioine with all the world
-- --
In praise of Henrie Percy, by my hopes
This present enterprise set of his head,
I do not thinke a brauer Gentleman,
More actiue, valiant, or more valiant yong,
More daring, or more bold is now aliue
To grace this latter age with noble deedes,
For my part I may speake it to my shame,
I haue a truant beene to Chiualrie,
And so I heare he doth account me too;
Yet this before my fathers maiestie,
I am content that he shall take the oddes
Of his great name and estimation,
And will to saue the blood on either side
Trie fortune with him in a single fight.
King.
And prince of Wales, so dare we venture thee,
Albeit, considerations infinite
Do make against it: no good Worcester no,
We loue our people well, euen those we loue
That are misled vpon your coosens part,
And will they take the offer of our grace,
Both he, and they, and you, yea euery man
Shall be my friend againe, and ile be his,
So tell your coosen, and bring me word
What he will do But if he will not yeeld,
Rebuke and dread correction waight on vs,
And they shall do their office. So be gone:
We will not now be troubled with replie,
We offer faire, take it aduisedly.
Exit Worcester.
Prin.
It will not be accepted on my life,
The Dowglas and the Hotspur both togither,
Are confident against the world in armes.
King.
Hence therefore, euery leader to his charge,
For on their answere will we set on them,
And God befriend vs as our cause is iust.
Exeunt: manent Prince, Falst.
Falst.
Hal, if thou see me downe in the battel
And bestride me, so, tis a poynt of friendship.
Prin.
Nothing but a Colossus can do thee that friendship,
Say thy prayers, and farewell.
-- --
Fal.
I would twere bed time Hal, and all well.
Prin.
Why, thou owest God a death.
Falst.
Tis not due yet, I would be loath to pay him before his
day, what need I be so forwarde with him that cals not on mee?
Well, tis no matter, honor prickes me on; yea, but how if honor
pricke me off when I come on? how then can honor set to a leg?
no, or an arme? no, or take away the griefe of a wound? no, honor
hath no skil in surgerie then? no, what is honor? a word, what
is in that word honor? what is that honour? aire, a trim reckoning.
Who hath it? he that died a Wednesday doth he feele it?
no, doth he heare it? no, tis insensible th&ebar; yea to the dead, but wil
not liue with the liuing; no, why? detraction will not suffer it,
therefore ile none of it; honor is a meere skutchion, and so ends
my Catechisme.
Exit.
Enter Worcester, sir Richard Uernon.
Wor.
O no, my nephew must not know sir Richard,
The liberal and kind offer of the king.
Ver.
Twere besthe did.
Wor.
Then are we all vnder one.
It is not possible, it cannot be
The king should keepe his word in louing vs,
He will suspect vs still, and find a time
To punish this offence in other faults,
Supposition, al our liues shall be stucke full of eyes,
For treason is but trusted like the Foxe,
Who neuer so tame, so cherisht and lockt vp,
Will haue a wilde tricke of his ancesters,
Looke how we can, or sad or merely,
Interpretation will misquote our lookes,
And we shall feed like oxen at a stall,
The better cherisht still the nearer death,
My nephewes trespasse may be well forgot,
It hath the excuse of youth and heat of blood,
And an adopted name of priueledge,
A hair-braind Hotspur gouernd by a spleene,
All his offences liue vpon my head
And on his fathers. We did traine him on,
And his corruption being tane from vs,
-- --
We as the spring of all shall pay for all:
Therefore good coosen; let not Harry know
In any case the offer of the King.
Enter Percy.
Ver.
Deliuer what you will; ile say tis so. Here coms your coosen.
Hot.
My vncle is returnd,
Deliuer vp my Lord of Westmerland,
Vncle, what newes?
Wor.
The king will bid you battell presently.
Doug.
Defie him by the Lord of Westmerland.
Hot.
Lord Douglas go you and tell him so.
Doug.
Marry and shal, and very willingly.
Exit. Dou.
Wor.
There is no seeming mercie in the king.
Hot
Did you beg any? God forbid.
Wor.
I tolde him gently of our greeuances,
Of his oath breaking, which he mended thus,
By now forswearing that he is forsworne,
He cals vs rebels, traitors, and will scourge
With haughtie armes this hatefull name in vs.
Enter Douglas.
Doug.
Arme gentlemen, to armes, for I haue throwne
A braue defiance in king Henries teeth,
And Westmerland that was ingag'd did beare it,
Which cannot chuse but bring him quickly on.
Wor.
The Prince of Wales stept forth before the king,
And nephew, chalengd you to single fight.
Hot.
O would the quarrel lay vpon our heads,
And that no man might draw short breath to day
But I and Harry Monmouth; tell me, tell me,
How shewed his tasking? seemd it in contempt.
Ver.
No, by my soule I neuer in my life
Did heare a chalenge vrgde more modestly,
Vnlesse a brother should a brother dare,
To gentle exercise and proofe of armes.
He gaue you all the duties of a man,
Trimd vp your praises with a Princely tongue,
Spoke your deseruings like a Chronicle,
Making you euer better then his praise,
By still dispraising praise valued with you,
And which became him like a prince indeed,
-- --
He made a blushing citall of himselfe,
And chid his truant youth with such a grace
As if he mastred there a double spirit
Of teaching and of learning instantly,
There did he pause, but let me tel the world
If he outliue the enuie of this day,
England did neuer owe so sweete a hope
So much misconstrued in his wantonnesse.
Hotsp.
Coosen I thinke thou art enamored
On his follies, neuer did I heare
Of any prince so wilde a libertie,
But be he as he will, yet once ere night
I will imbrace him with a souldiours arme,
That he shall shrinke vnder my curtesie,
Arme, arme with speed, and fellowes, soldiors, friends,
Better consider what you haue to do
Then I that haue not wel the gift of tongue
Can lift your blood vp with perswasion.
Enter a Messenger.
Mes.
My Lord, here are letters for you.
Hot.
I cannot read them now,
O Gentlemen the time of life is short,
To spend that shortnes basely were too long
If life did ride vpon a dials point,
Still ending at the arriuall of an houre,
And if we liue we liue to tread on kings,
If die, braue death when princes die with vs,
Now for our consciences, the armes are faire
When the intent of bearing them is iust.
Enter another.
Mes.
My Lord, prepare the king comes on a pace.
Hot.
I thanke him that he cuts me from my tale,
For I professe not talking onely this,
Let each man do his best, and here draw I a sword,
Whose temper I intend to staine
With the best bloud that I can meet withall.
In the aduenture of this perillous day,
Now esperance Percy and set on,
Sound all the loftie instruments of war,
And by that Musicke let vs all embrace,
-- --
For heauen to earth some of vs neuer shall
A second time do such a courtesie.
Here they embrace, the trumpets sound, the king enters with his
power, alarme to the battel, then enter Douglas, and sir Walter Blunt.
Blunt.
What is thy name that in battell thus thou crossest me,
What honour dost thou seeke vpon my head?
Doug.
Know then my name is Douglas,
And I do haunt thee in the battell thus
Because some tell me that thou art a king.
Blunt.
They tell thee true.
Doug.
The Lord of Stafford deare to day hath bought
Thy likenesse, for in steed of thee king Harry
This sword hath ended him, so shall it thee
Vnlesse thou yeeld thee as my prisoner.
Blunt.
I was not borne a yeelder thou proud Scot,
And thou shalt find a king that will reuenge
Lord Staffords death.
They fight, Douglas kils Blunt, then enter Hotspur.
Hot
O Douglas hadst thou fought at Holmedon thus
I neuer had triumpht vpon a Scot.
Doug.
Als done, als won here, breathles lies the king.
Hot.
Where?
Doug.
Here.
Hot.
This Douglas? no, I know this face full well,
A gallant knight he was, his name was Blunt,
Semblably furnisht like the king himselfe.
Doug.
Ah foole, goe with thy soule whither it goes,
A borrowed title hast thou bought too deare.
Why didst thou tell me that thou wert a king?
Hot.
The king hath many marching in his coates.
Doug.
Now by my sword I will kill al his coates.
Ile murder all his wardrop, peece by peece
Vntill I meete the king.
Hot.
Vp and away,
Our souldiers stand full fairely for the day.
Alarme, Enter Falstalffe solus.
Falst.
Though I could scape shot-free at London, I feare the
shot here, heres no skoring but vpon the pate. Soft, who are you?
sir Walter Blunt, theres honour for you, heres no vanitie, I am as
-- --
hot as molten lead, & as heauie too: God keepe leade out of me,
I need no more weight then mine owne bowels. I haue led my
rag of Muffins where they are pepperd theres not three of my
150. left aliue, and they are for the townes ende, to beg during
life: but who comes here?
Enter the Prince.
Prin.
What, stands thou idle here? lend me thy sword,
Many a noble man lies starke and stiffe,
Vnder the hoofes of vaunting enemies,
whose deaths are yet vnreuenged, I preethe lend mee thy sword.
Falst.
O Hal, I preethe giue me leaue to breath a while, Turke
Gregorie neuer did such deeds in armes as I haue don this day,
I haue paid Percy, I haue made him sure.
Prin.
He is indeed, and liuing to kill thee:
I preethe lend me thy sword.
Fal.
Nay before God Hal, if Percy be aliue thou gets not my
sword, but take my pistoll if thou wilt.
Prin.
Giue it me, what? is it in the case?
Falst.
I Hal, tis hot, tis hot, theres that will sacke a Citie.
The Prince drawes it out, and finds it to be a bottle of Sacke.
Prin.
What is it a time to iest and dally now?
He throwes the bottle at him.
Exit.
Falst.
Well if Percy be aliue, ile pierce him; if hee doe come in
my way so, if he doe not, if I come in his willingly, let him make
a Carbonado of me. I like not such grinning honour as sir Walter
hath giue me life, which if I can saue, so: if not, honor comes
vnlookt for, and theres an end.
Alarme, excursions. Enter the King, the Prince, Lord Iohn of Lancaster, Earle of Westmerland.
King.
I preethe Harry withdraw thy selfe, thou bleedest too much,
Lord Iohn of Lancaster go you with him.
P. Iohn.
Not I my Lord, vnlesse I did bleed too.
Prin.
I beseech your maiestie make vp,
Least your retirement do amaze your friends.
King.
I will do so. My Lord of Westmerland lead him to his tent.
West.
Come to my Lord, ile lead you to your tent.
Prin.
Lead me my Lord? I do not need your helpe,
And God forbid a shallow scratch should driue
-- --
The Prince of Wales from such a field as this,
Where staind nobilitie lies troden on,
And rebels armes triumphe in massacres.
Ioh.
We breath too long, come coosen Westmerland
Our dutie this way lies: For Gods sake come.
Prin.
By God thou hast deceiu'd me Lancaster,
I did not thinke thee Lord of such a spirit,
Before I lou'd thee as a brother Iohn,
But now I do respect thee as my soule.
King.
I saw him hold Lord Percy at the poynt,
With lustier maintenance then I did looke for
Of such an vngrowne warrior.
Prin.
O this boy lends mettall to vs all.
Exit.
Doug.
Another king, they grow like Hydraes heads,
I am the Douglas fatall to all those
That weare those colours on them. What art thou
That counterfetst the person of a King?
King.
The king himself, who Douglas grieues at hart,
So many of his shadowes thou hast met
And not the verie king, I haue two boies
Seeke Percy and thy selfe about the field,
But seeing thou falst on me so luckily
I will assay thee and defend thy selfe.
Doug.
I feare thou art another counterfet,
And yet in faith thou bearest thee like a king,
But mine I am sure thou art who ere thou be,
And thus I winne thee.
They fight, the king being in danger, Enter Prince of Wales.
Prin.
Hold vp thy head vile Scot, or thou art like
Neuer to hold it vp againe, the spirits
Of Valiant Sherly, Stafford, Blunt are in my armes,
It is the Prince of Wales that threatens thee,
Who neuer promiseth but he meanes to pay.
They fight, Douglas flieth.
Cheerly my Lord, how fares your grace?
Sir Nicholas Gawsey hath for succour sent,
And so hath Clifton, ile to Clifton straight.
King.
Stay and breath a while,
-- --
Thou hast redeemed thy lost opinion,
And shewde thou makst some tender of my life,
In this faire rescue thou hast brought to me.
Prin.
O God they did me too much iniury,
That euer said I harkned for your death,
If it were so, I might haue let alone
The insulting hand of Douglas ouer you,
Which would haue been as speedy in your end
As al the poisonous potions in the world,
And sau'd the trecherous labour of your sonne.
King.
Make vp to Clifton, ile to S. Nicholas Gawsey.
Exit Ki:
Enter Hotspur.
Hot.
If I mistake not, thou art Harry Monmouth.
Prin.
Thou speakst as if I would deny my name.
Hot.
My name is Harry Percy.
Pr.
Why then I see a very valiant rebel of the name;
I am the Prince of Wales, and thinke not Percy
To share with me in glory any more:
Two stars keepe not their motion in one sphere,
Nor can one England brooke a double raigne
Of Harry Percy and the Prince of Wales.
Hot.
Now shal it Harry, for the houre is come
To end the one of vs, and would to God
Thy name in armes were now as great as mine.
Prin.
Ile make it greater ere I part from thee,
And al the budding honors on thy crest
Ile crop to make a garland for my head.
Hot.
I can no longer brooke thy vanities.
They fight: Enter Falstalffe.
Falst.
Well said Hall, to it Hall. Nay you shall find no boyes
play here I can tel you.
Enter Douglas, he fighteth with Falstalffe, he fals
down as if he were dead, the Prince killeth Percy.
Hot.
Oh Harry thou hast robd me of my youth,
I better brooke the losse of brittle life
Then those proud titles thou hast won of me,
-- --
They wound my thoughts worse then thy sword my flesh,
But thoughts the slaues of life, and life times foole,
And time that takes suruey of all the world
Must haue a stop. O I could prophecy,
But that the earthy and cold hand of death
Lies on my tongue: no Percy thou art dust
And food for.
Pr.
For wormes, braue Percy. Fare thee wel great hart
Ill weaud ambition, how much art thou shrunke,
When that this body did containe a spirit,
A kingdom for it was too small a bound,
But now two paces of the vilest earth
Is roome inough, this earth that beares the dead
Beares not aliue so stout a gentleman,
If thou wert sensible of curtesie
I should not make so deare a shew of zeale,
But let my fauors hide thy mangled face,
And euen in thy behalfe ile thanke my selfe,
For doing these faire rights of tendernesse,
Adiew and take thy praise with thee to heauen,
Thy ignominy sleepe with thee in the graue,
But not remembred in thy Epitaph.
He spieth Falstalffe on the ground.
What old acquaintance, could not all this flesh
Keepe in a little life? poore Iacke farewell,
I could haue better sparde a better man:
O I should haue a heauy misse of thee,
If I were much in loue with vanitie:
Death hath not strooke so fat a Deere to day,
Though many dearer in this bloudy fray,
Inboweld will I see thee by and by,
Til then in bloud by noble Percy lie.
Exit.
Falstalffe riseth vp.
Fal.
Inboweld, if thou inbowel me to day, ile giue you leaue
to powder me and eate me too to morrowe. Zbloud twas time
to counterfet, or that hot termagant Scot had paide me scot and
lot too. Counterfet? I lie, I am no counterfet, to die is to bee a
counterfet, for he is but the counterfet of a man, who hath not
-- --
the life of a m&abar;: but to co&ubar;terfet dying when a man therby liueth,
is to be no counterfet, but the true & perfect image of life indeed.
The better parte of valour is discretion, in the which better part
I haue saued my life. Zounds I am afraid of this gunpowder Percy,
though he be dead, how if he should counterfet too and rise?
by my faith I am afraid hee woulde proue the better counterfet,
therefore ile make him sure, yea, and ile sweare I kild him. Why
may not he rise as well as I? nothing confutes me but eies, and no
body sees me: therefore sirrha, with a new wound in your thigh,
come you along with me.
He takes vp Hotspur on his backe. Enter Prince Iohn of Lancaster.
Prin.
Come brother Iohn, full brauely hast thou flesht
Thy mayden sword.
Iohn of Lan
But soft, whom haue we heere?
Did you not tell me this fat man was dead?
Prin.
I did, I saw him dead,
Breathlesse and bleeding on the ground. Art thou aliue?
Or is it fantasie that playes vpon our eiesight?
I preethe speake, we will not trust our eies
Without our eares, thou art not what thou seemst.
Fal.
No thats certaine, I am not a double man: but if I bee
not Iacke Falstalffe, then am I a Iacke: there is Percy, if your
father will doe me anie honour, so: if not, let him kill the next
Percie himselfe: I looke to bee either Earle or Duke, I can assure
you.
Prin.
Why Percy, I kild my selfe, and saw thee dead.
Falst.
Didst thou? Lord, Lord, howe this world is giuen to
lying, I graunt you I was downe, and out of breath, and so was
he, but we rose both at an instant, and fought a long houre by
Shrewesburie clocke, if I may be beleeude so: if not, let them
that should rewarde valour, beare the sinne vppon their owne
heads. Ile take it vpon my death, I gaue him this wound in the
thigh, if the man were aliue, and would denie it, zounds I would
make him eate a peece of my sword.
Iohn.
This is the strangest tale that euer I heard.
Prin.
This is the strangest fellow, brother Iohn,
Come bring your luggage nobly on your backe.
-- --
For my part, if a lie may do thee grace,
Ile guild it with the happiest termes I haue.
A retraite is sounded.
Prin.
The Trumpet sounds retrait, the day is our,
Come brother let vs to the highest of the field,
To see what friends are liuing, who are dead.
Exeunt.
Fal.
Ile follow as they say for reward. Hee that rewardes mee
God reward him. If I do growe great, ile growe lesse, for ile
purge and leaue Sacke, and liue cleanlie as a noble man
should do.
Exit.
The Trumpets sound. Enter the King, Prince of Wales, Lord
Iohn of Lancaster, Earle of Westmerland, with Worcester,
and Vernon prisoners.
King.
Thus euer did rebellion find rebuke,
Ill spirited Worcester, did not we send grace,
Pardon, and tearmes of loue to all of you?
And wouldst thou turne our offers contrary?
Misuse the tenor of thy kinsmans trust.
Three knights vpon our party slaine to day,
A noble Earle and many a creature else,
Had been aliue this houre,
If like a Christian thou hadst truly borne
Betwixt our armies true intelligence.
Wor.
What I haue done my safety vrg'd me to:
And I embrace this fortune patiently,
Since not to be auoided it fals on me.
King.
Beare Worcester to the death and Vernon too:
Other Offendors we will pause vpon.
How goes the field?
Prin.
The noble Scot Lord Dowglas, when he saw
The fortune of the day quite turnd from him,
The noble Percy slaine and all his men
Vpon the foot of feare, fled with the rest
And falling from a hill, he was so bruisd,
That the pursuers tooke him. At my tent
The Douglas is: and I beseech your grace
I may dispose of him.
-- --
King.
With all my hart.
Prin.
Then brother Iohn of Lancaster,
To you this honorable bounty shal belong,
Go to the Douglas and deliuer him
Vp to his pleasure, ransomlesse and free,
His valours shewne vpon our Crests to daie
Haue taught vs how to cherish such high deeds,
Euen in the bosome of our aduersaries.
John.
I thanke your grace for this high curtesie,
Which I shall giue away immediatly.
King
Then this remaines that we deuide our power,
You sonne Iohn, and my coosen Westmerland
Towards York shal bend, you with your deerest speed
To meet Northumberland and the Prelate Scroope,
Who as we heare are busily in armes:
My selfe and you sonne Harry will towards Wales,
To fight with Glendower and the Earle of March,
Rebellion in this land shall loose his sway,
Meeting the checke of such another day,
And since this businesse so faire is done,
Let vs not leaue till all our owne be won.
Exeunt
