First Car.

Heigh-ho! an it ^note be not four by the day, I'll be hanged: Charles' wain is over the new chimney, and yet our horse not packed. What, ostler!

Ost. [Within] ^note

Anon, anon.

First Car.

I prithee, Tom, beat Cut's saddle, put a few flocks in the point; poor ^note jade, is wrung in the withers out of all cess ^note.

Sec. Car.

Peas and beans are as dank here as a dog ^note, and that ^note is the next way to give poor jades the bots: this house is turned upside down since Robin Ostler ^note died.

First Car.

Poor fellow, never ^note joyed since the price of oats rose; it was the death of him.

Sec. Car.

I think this be ^note the most villanous house in all London road for fleas: I am stung like a tench.

First Car.

Like a tench ^note! by the mass ^note, there is ne'er a king christen ^note could be better bit than I have been since the first cock.

Sec. Car.

Why, they ^note will allow us ne'er a jordan, and then we leak in your ^note chimney; and your chamber-lie breeds fleas like a loach.

First Car.

What, ostler! come away and be hanged! come away.

Sec. Car.

I have a gammon of bacon and two razes ^note of ginger, to be delivered as far as Charing-cross.

First Car.

God's body ^note! the turkeys in my pannier ^note are quite starved. What, ostler! A plague on thee! hast thou never an eye in thy head? canst not hear? An ^note 'twere not as good deed ^note as drink, to break the pate on ^note thee, I am a very villain. Come, and be hanged! hast no faith in thee?

Gads.

Good morrow, carriers. What's o'clock?

First Car.

I think it be two o'clock.

Gads.

I prithee, lend me thy lantern, to see my gelding in the stable.

First Car.

Nay, by God, soft ^note; I know a trick worth two of that, i' faith ^note.

Gads.

I pray thee ^note, lend me thine.

Sec. Car.

Ay, when? canst tell? Lend me thy lantern, quoth he ^note? marry, I'll see thee hanged first.

Gads.

Sirrah carrier, what time do you mean to come to London?

Sec. Car.

Time enough to go to bed with a candle, I warrant thee. Come, neighbour Mugs, we'll call up the gentlemen: they will along with company, for they have great charge.

Gads.

What, ho! chamberlain!

Cham. [Within ^note]

At hand, quoth pick-purse.

Gads.

That's even as fair as—at hand, quoth ^note the chamberlain; for thou variest no more from picking of purses than giving direction doth from labouring; thou layest the plot how.

Cham.

Good morrow, Master Gadshill. It holds current that I told you yesternight: there's a franklin in the wild of Kent hath brought three hundred marks with him in gold: I heard him tell it to one of his company last night at supper; a kind of auditor; one that hath abundance of charge too, God knows what. They are up already, and call for eggs and butter: they will away presently.

Gads.

Sirrah, if they meet not with Saint Nicholas' clerks, I'll give thee this neck.

Cham.

No, I'll none of it: I pray thee ^note, keep that for the hangman; for I know thou worshippest Saint Nicholas as truly as a man of falsehood may.

Gads.

What talkest thou to me of the hangman? if I hang, I'll make a fat pair of gallows; for if I hang, old Sir John hangs with me, and thou knowest ^note he is ^note no starveling. Tut! there are other Trojans that thou dreamest not of, the which for sport sake are content to do the profession

some grace; that would, if matters should be looked into, for their own ^note credit sake, make all whole. I am joined with no foot-land rakers ^note, no long-staff sixpenny strikers, none of these ^note mad mustachio purple-hued malt-worms; but with nobility and tranquillity ^note, burgomasters and great oneyers ^note, such as can hold in, such as will strike sooner than speak, and speak sooner than drink, and drink ^{note note} sooner than pray: and yet, 'zounds ^note, I lie; for they pray continually to ^note their saint, the commonwealth; or rather, not pray ^note to her, but prey ^note on her, for they ride up and down on her and make ^note her their boots.

Cham.

What, the commonwealth their boots? will she hold out water in foul way?

Gads.

She will, she will; justice hath liquored her. We steal as in a castle, cock-sure; we have the receipt of fern-seed, we walk invisible.

Cham.

Nay, by my faith ^note, I think ^note you are more beholding ^note to the night than to fern-seed ^note for your walking invisible.

Gads.

Give me thy hand: thou shalt have a share in our purchase ^note, as I am a true man.

Cham.

Nay, rather let me have it, as you are a false thief.

Gads.

Go to; ‘homo’ is a common name to all men. Bid the ostler bring my ^note gelding out of the stable. Farewell, you ^note muddy knave.