Ber.

A plague upon him! muffled! he can say nothing of me: hush, hush! ^note

First Lord.

Hoodman ^{note note} comes! Portotartarosa.

First Sold. ^note

He calls for the tortures: what will you say without 'em?

Par.

I will confess what I know without constraint: if ye pinch me like a pasty, I can say no more ^note.

First Sold.

Bosko chimurcho.

First Lord.

Boblibindo chicurmurco.

First Sold.

You are a merciful general. Our general bids you answer to what I shall ask you out of a note.

Par.

And truly, as I hope to live.

First Sold. [reads]

First demand of him how many horse the Duke is strong. What say you to that?

Par.

Five or six thousand; but very weak and unserviceable: the troops are all scattered, and the commanders very poor rogues, upon my reputation and credit and as I hope to live.

First Sold.

Shall I set down your answer so?

Par.

Do: I'll take the sacrament on 't, how and which way you will.

Ber.

All's one to him. What ^note a past-saving slave is this!

First Lord.

You're ^note deceived, my lord: this is Monsieur Parolles, the gallant militarist,—that was his own phrase,—

that had the whole theoric ^note of war in the knot of his scarf, and the practice in the chape of his dagger.

Sec. Lord.

I will never trust a man again for keeping his sword clean, nor believe he can have every thing in him by wearing his apparel neatly.

First Sold.

Well, that's set down.

Par.

Five or six thousand horse, I said,—I will say true,—or thereabouts, set down, for I'll speak truth.

First Lord.

He's very near the truth in this.

Ber.

But I con him no thanks for't, in the nature he delivers it.

Par.

Poor rogues, I pray you, say.

First Sold.

Well, that's set down.

Par.

I humbly thank you, sir: a truth's a truth, the rogues are marvellous poor.

First Sold. [reads]

Demand of him, of what strength they are a-foot. What say you to that?

Par.

By my troth, sir, if I were to live ^note this ^note present hour, I will tell true. Let me see: Spurio, a hundred and fifty; Sebastian, so many; Corambus, so many; Jaques, so many; Guiltian ^note, Cosmo, Lodowick, and Gratii, two hundred and fifty ^note each; mine own company, Chitopher, Vaumond, Bentii, two hundred and fifty ^note each: so that the muster-file, rotten and sound, upon my life, amounts not to fifteen thousand poll; half of the which dare not shake the snow from off their cassocks, lest they shake themselves to pieces.

Ber.

What shall be done to him?

First Lord.

Nothing, but let him have thanks. Demand of him my condition ^note, and what credit I have with the Duke.

First Sold.

Well, that's set down. [Reads] You shall demand of him, whether one Captain Dumain be i' the ^note camp, a Frenchman; what his reputation is with the Duke; what his valour, honesty, and expertness in wars ^note; or whether he thinks it were not possible,

with well-weighing sums of gold, to corrupt him to a revolt. What say you to this? what do you know of it?

Par.

I beseech you, let me answer to the particular ^note of the inter'gatories ^note: demand them singly.

First Sold.

Do you know this Captain Dumain?

Par.

I know him: a' ^note was a botcher's 'prentice in Paris, from whence he was whipped for getting the shrieve's ^note fool ^notewith child,—a dumb innocent, that could not say him nay.

Ber.

Nay, by your leave, hold your hands; though I know his brains are forfeit to the next tile that falls.

First Sold.

Well, is this captain in the Duke of Florence's camp?

Par.

Upon my knowledge, he is, and lousy.

First Lord.

Nay, look not so upon me; we shall hear of your lordship ^note anon.

First Sold.

What is his reputation with the Duke?

Par.

The Duke knows him for no other but a poor officer of mine; and writ to me this ^note other day to turn him out o' the ^note band: I think I have his letter in my pocket.

First Sold.

Marry, we'll search.

Par.

In good sadness, I do not know; either it is there, or it is upon a file ^note with the Duke's other letters in my tent.

First Sold.

Here 'tis; here's a paper: shall I read it to you?

Par.

I do not know if it be it or no.

Ber.

Our interpreter does it well.

First Sold.

Excellently.

First Sold. [reads]

Dian, the count's a fool, and full of gold ^note,—

Par.

That is not the Duke's letter, sir; that is an advertisement to a proper maid in Florence, one Diana, to take heed of the allurement of one Count Rousillon, a

foolish idle boy, but for all that very ruttish: I pray you, sir, put it up again.

First Sold.

Nay, I'll read it first, by your favour.

Par.

My meaning in't, I protest, was very honest in the behalf of the maid; for I knew the young count to be a dangerous and lascivious boy, who is a whale to virginity and devours up all the fry it finds.

Ber.

Damnable both-sides rogue!

First Sold. [reads ^note]
When he swears oaths, bid him drop gold, and take it;
  After he scores, he never pays the score:
Half won is match well made ^note; match, and well ^{note note} make it;
  He ne'er pays after-debts, take it before;
And say a soldier, Dian, told thee this,
Men are to mell with, boys are not ^note to kiss:
For count of this, the count's ^note a fool, I know it,
Who pays before, but not when ^note he does owe it.
  Thine, as he vowed to thee in thine ear,

Parolles.

Ber.

He shall be whipped through the army with this rhyme in's ^note forehead.

Sec. Lord.

This is your devoted friend, sir, the manifold linguist and the armipotent soldier.

Ber.

I could endure any thing before but a cat, and now ^note he's a cat to me.

First Sold.

I perceive, sir, by the ^note general's looks, we shall be fain to hang you.

Par.

My life, sir, in any case: not that I am afraid to die; but that, my offences being many, I would repent out

the remainder of nature: let me live, sir, in a dungeon, i' the ^note stocks, or ^note any where, so I may live.

First Sold.

We'll see what may be done, so you confess freely; therefore, once more to this Captain Dumain: you have answered to his reputation with the Duke and to his valour: what is his honesty?

Par.

He will steal, sir, an egg ^note out of a cloister: for rapes and ravishments he parallels Nessus: he professes not keeping of oaths; in breaking ^note 'em ^note he is stronger than Hercules: he will lie, sir, with such volubility, that you would think truth were a fool: drunkenness is his best virtue, for he will be swine-drunk; and in his sleep he does little harm, save to his bed-clothes about him; but they know his conditions and lay him in straw. I have but little more to say, sir, of his honesty: he has every thing that an honest man should not have; what an honest man should have, he has nothing.

First Lord.

I begin to love him for this.

Ber.

For this description of thine honesty? A pox upon him for me, he's ^note more and more a cat.

First Sold.

What say you to his expertness in war?

Par.

Faith, sir, has ^note led the drum before the English tragedians; to belie him, I will not, and more of his soldiership I know not; except, in that country he had the honour to be the officer at a place there called Mile-end, to instruct for the doubling of files: I would do the man what honour I can, but of this I am not certain.

First Lord.

He hath out-villained ^note villany so far, that the rarity redeems him.

Ber.

A pox on him, he's a cat still.

First Sold.

His qualities being at this poor price, I need not to ask you if gold will corrupt him to revolt.

Par.

Sir, for a quart d'écu ^note he will sell the fee-simple of

his salvation, the inheritance of it; and cut the entail from all remainders, and a perpetual succession for it ^note perpetually.

First Sold.

What's his brother, the other Captain Dumain?

Sec. Lord.

Why does he ask him of me?

First Sold.

What's he?

Par.

E'en a crow o' the ^note same nest; not altogether so great as the first in goodness, but greater a great deal in evil: he excels his brother for a coward, yet his brother is reputed one of the best that is: in a retreat he outruns any lackey; marry, in coming on he has ^note. the cramp.

First Sold.

If your life be saved, will you undertake to betray the Florentine?

Par.

Ay, and the captain of his horse, Count Rousillon.

First Sold.

I'll whisper with the general, and know his pleasure.

Par. [Aside ^note]

I'll no more drumming; a plague of all drums! Only to seem to deserve well, and to beguile the supposition of that lascivious young boy the count, have I run into this danger ^note. Yet who would have suspected an ambush where I was taken?

First Sold.

There is no remedy, sir, but you must die: the general says, you that have so traitorously discovered the secrets of your army and made such pestiferous reports of men very nobly held, can serve the world for no honest use; therefore you must die. Come, headsman, off with his head.

Par.

O Lord, sir, let me live, or let me see my death!

First Sold.

That shall you, and take your leave of all your friends.

So, look about you: know you any here?

Ber.

Good morrow, noble captain.

Sec. Lord. ^note

God bless you, Captain Parolles.

First Lord.

God save you, noble captain.

Sec. Lord. ^note

Captain, what greeting will you to my Lord Lafeu? I am for France.

First Lord.

Good captain, will you give me a copy of the sonnet ^note you writ to Diana in behalf of the Count Rousillon? an ^note I were not a very coward, I'ld compel it of you: but fare you well.

First Sold.

You are undone, captain, all but your scarf; that has a knot on't yet.

Par.

Who cannot be crushed with a plot?

First Sold.

If you could find out a country where but women were that had received so much shame, you might begin an impudent nation. Fare ye well, sir; I am for France too: we shall speak of you there.

Par.
Yet am I ^note thankful: if my heart were great,
'Twould burst at this. Captain I'll be no more;
But I will eat and drink, and sleep as soft
As captain shall: simply the thing I am
Shall make me live. Who knows himself a braggart,
Let him fear this, for it will come to pass ^note
That every braggart shall be found an ass.
Rust, sword! cool, blushes! and, Parolles, live
Safest in shame! being fool'd, by foolery thrive!
There's place and means for every man alive.
I'll after them. [Exit. ^note

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