Nothing could exceed the
rage into which Mrs. Bull was thrown by
this di&longs;appointment. “O the&longs;e cur&longs;ed,
&longs;tubborn, ungrateful, di&longs;obedient wretches,
to refu&longs;e all my invitations, and &longs;purn
at my offers of friend&longs;hip and

[figure description] Page 158.[end figure description]

reconciliation! What, not admit my deputies into
their hou&longs;es! Did ever any woman suffer
&longs;uch di&longs;grace? Well, faith I will be
revenged, and they &longs;hall feel the power of
my vengeance. I will pro&longs;ecute them to
the utmo&longs;t extremity of the law; ay, and
beyond law too, for I will &longs;et their hou&longs;es
on fire over their heads, and drive them
off the land! And as to that deceitful dog
of a Lewis, I will rai&longs;e &longs;uch a hornet's
ne&longs;t about his ears, that he &longs;hall repent
his bargain! If Lord Strut attempts to
help him, I'll lay an attachment upon his
riche&longs;t farms. And as for Nic Frog, if
he lends them money, I will break up his
warehou&longs;e, and &longs;ell all his goods by auction.
I will &longs;atiate my vengeance on the
whole pack of them, and if I fall my&longs;elf
among the general wreck, I &longs;hall have the
glory of dying like Samfon in the ruin of
my enemies.”

The rage which Mrs. Bull indulged
on this occa&longs;ion, and the noi&longs;e which &longs;he

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made in her raving fits, rai&longs;ed a great alarm
in the family, and as hy&longs;terics are
&longs;aid to be catching, &longs;o the di&longs;temper
&longs;pread into the two next families, viz. into
tho&longs;e of &longs;i&longs;ter Peg and brother Patrick.
The former imagined that it was Mr.
Bull's intention to call in Lord Peter to
his aid, becau&longs;e he had been of late somewhat
complai&longs;ant to tho&longs;e of his natural
children, which re&longs;ided in the family;
and the latter expected that he &longs;hould be
treated in the &longs;ame manner as the foresters,
becau&longs;e he had complained of &longs;ome
re&longs;traints and impo&longs;itions from his brother
John Bull, in re&longs;pect to his trade and business,
which was that of a linen draper.
Old jealou&longs;ies and grudges were revived
on this occa&longs;ion, and the whole neighbourhood
was in confu&longs;ion. The dogs in
Peg's family kept a con&longs;tant howling and
barking, and were an&longs;wered by tho&longs;e of Mr.
Bull. Several of them actually ran mad,[58]
and Bull was obliged to place guards at

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his doors and gates, who attacked the curs
with clubs and killed &longs;everal on the &longs;pot.
In the mid&longs;t of this hurly burly, his hou&longs;e
was &longs;et on fire, and was actually &longs;een
blazing in thirty &longs;ix places at once;[59] the
fire even penetrated madam's drawing
room, and her card party were obliged to
hand buckets and pump the engine; and
it was not without the greate&longs;t exertions
that the whole man&longs;ion was &longs;aved from
utter de&longs;truction.

A DIFFLCULTY al&longs;o aro&longs;e from another
quarter, where it was little expected.
The mea&longs;ure which Mr. Bull had adopted
of &longs;topping the high way provoked all
the neighbours, who thought it a great
infringement of their common rights;
but as he was a per&longs;on of &longs;o much wealth
and power, they were afraid openly to
conte&longs;t that point with him. At length
an elderly widow lady, of large property,
with whom he had always lived on friend

[figure description] Page 161.[end figure description]

ly terms, and who generally went by the
name of Madam Kate, took the liberty to
tell him, that &longs;he could no longer &longs;uffer
her neighbours and her&longs;elf to be &longs;o imposed
upon; that the high way was common
to all; that he had no right to &longs;top
pa&longs;&longs;engers and examine them, but that
every body ought to go about their lawful
bu&longs;ine&longs;s without let or hindrance, and
that &longs;he was determined to form a combination
[60] with Mr. Frog, Mr. Lewis,
Lord Strut, and all the other neighbours,
to remove the incumbrances which Mr.
Bull had thrown in the way, and clear the
pa&longs;&longs;age.

This combination extended to other
objects, be&longs;ides clearing the high way.
They were all di&longs;po&longs;ed to help the foresters
again&longs;t Mr. Bull, though in different
ways. Lewis had already lent them
money and feed lawyers to plead for them.

[figure description] Page 162.[end figure description]

Lord Strut, though rich in landed interest,
yet generally anticipated his revenues,
(or as the vulgar phra&longs;e is, ate the calf in
the cow's belly) he therefore had no
money to &longs;pare; but to oblige his friend
Lewis, he laid an attachment on a southerly
corner of the fore&longs;t, which formerly
belonged to him, and which from the numerous
flowers with which it abounds,
had got the name of Terra Florida. At
the &longs;ame time he attached one of Mr.
Bull's favourite hunting &longs;eats,[61] which
commanded an exten&longs;ive pro&longs;pect, and
was &longs;ituate extremely convenient for
hunting, fowling, and fi&longs;hing. It had
formerly belonged to Strut, but he had
fooli&longs;hly lo&longs;t it by &longs;taking it in a game of
whi&longs;t, which he played with Mr. Bull. It
was a doubt in law whether real e&longs;tate
could be held by &longs;uch tenure, but Bull
had po&longs;&longs;e&longs;&longs;ion, and that you know is eleven
points of the law. At any rate, it
would oblige Bull to defend; and that

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would co&longs;t him money, and divert &longs;ome
at lea&longs;t of his lawyers from the bu&longs;ine&longs;s of
the fore&longs;t.

A SECRET corre&longs;pondence had for
&longs;ome time been carried on between the
fore&longs;ters and Mr. Frog, for a loan of ca&longs;h
and a mercantile contract. Bull had suspected
it, but could not prove it, till one
night, his myrmidons caught a me&longs;&longs;enger
from the fore&longs;t and &longs;earched his pockets,[62]
in which were found certain letters and
other papers, which were &longs;uppo&longs;ed to amount
to full evidence.

Upon this occa&longs;ion an adverti&longs;ement
was publi&longs;hed, according to fa&longs;hion, justifying
the mea&longs;ures about to be taken, and
deploring the evils which were connected
with them. However &longs;mall a &longs;hare of
credit the&longs;e publications obtain, it is generally
as much as they de&longs;erve.

[figure description] Page 164.[end figure description]

To make &longs;hort work with Frog, Mr.
Bull got a &longs;earch warrant, and &longs;ent a bailiff
to his riche&longs;t warehou&longs;e,[63] who entered
it, per fas aut nefas, tumbled over the
merchandi&longs;e under pretence of &longs;earching
for &longs;tolen goods; and having taken away
as many as he plea&longs;ed, by a writ of venditioni
exponas, he put them up at auction,
and it is &longs;aid made a fortune by this
job. Mr. Lewis was &longs;o exa&longs;perated at
the outrage thus committed on his friend
Frog, that by a writ of &longs;cire facias he
laid claim to the ware hou&longs;e and its
contents, and brought in Bull for damages.

In &longs;hort, Mr. Bull now found him&longs;elf
&longs;ou&longs;ed over head and ears in that “deep
ditch,” the law. Like I&longs;hmael of old,
his hand was again&longs;t every man, and every
man's hand again&longs;t him. Look which
way &longs;oever he would, he found enemies,
and his own family were continually

[figure description] Page 165.[end figure description]

buzzing in his ears that he would bring his
affairs to ruin.

By the a&longs;&longs;i&longs;tance derived from the loans
which they had negotiated with Lewis
and Frog, and the additional coun&longs;ellors
and attornies which Lewis employed for
them, the fore&longs;ters pur&longs;ued the controversy
with as much vigor as the forms,
delays, and uncertainty of the law would
permit. No le&longs;s than four years longer
were con&longs;umed in this expen&longs;ive quarrel,
and Mr. Bull's numerous retinue of lawyers
were employing them&longs;elves in the
various chicanery and tergiver&longs;ations of
their profe&longs;&longs;ion, all the while fattening on
the profits of the &longs;uit; whil&longs;t his debt
was growing at &longs;uch a rate that he was at
his wit's end to keep the intere&longs;t from accumulating
as well as the principal. At
length, by a capital manoelig;uvre of Pipeweed's
grand&longs;on George, aided by the
coun&longs;ellors of Lewis, the cau&longs;e was
brought to a hearing at York court, and

[figure description] Page 166.[end figure description]

the arguments were of &longs;uch efficacy that a
&longs;econd verdict was given in favour of the
fore&longs;ters, with large damages. This verdict
came &longs;o near to a final deci&longs;ion, that
all Mr. Bull's friends were convinced he
could no longer maintain an action again&longs;t
the fore&longs;ters; and &longs;ome tru&longs;ty old servants
ventured to whi&longs;per in madam's ear
that it was high time to end the controversy,
for that it could not po&longs;&longs;ibly be
carried any farther without bringing the
family and the trade to total ruin.

“Look ye, madam, &longs;aid they, how all
the &longs;chemes which you have laid have
been uniformly defeated; you have professed
to know the family &longs;ecrets of the&longs;e
fore&longs;ters; but tho&longs;e fellows who pretended
to give you this information have deceived
you. In fact they have no &longs;uch
&longs;ecrets as your lady&longs;hip imagines. What
has been openly told you all along is the
truth, and you ought long ago to have believed
it. Now the conviction has

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forced it&longs;elf upon you, and you can no longer
with&longs;tand it. The fore&longs;ters have been
defending their title in the law, and they
have made it appear &longs;o plainly, that no
jury in the world will ever give a verdict
again&longs;t them. All who are acquainted
with new lands know that the labour attending
the improvement of them is worth
ten times more than the land; and in fact
gives the be&longs;t title to it. If our ma&longs;ter
will now end the matter by a compromi&longs;e,
he may yet &longs;ave &longs;ome part of the manor
at the northward, where is the be&longs;t of
hunting and fi&longs;hing; but if he pur&longs;ues the
matter any farther he will lo&longs;e it all.”

These faithful remon&longs;trances, enforced
by the nece&longs;&longs;ity of the ca&longs;e, began to have
&longs;ome effect on the turbulent mind of
madam. She &longs;aw that it was in vain to
contend again&longs;t the opinions of all mankind,
and therefore in her next curtain
lecture &longs;he held a &longs;hort dialogue with Mr.
Bull, thus—

[figure description] Page 168.[end figure description]

Mrs. B. My dear, I have been thinking
whether it would not be be&longs;t for you
to come to a &longs;ettlement of this long controversy.

Mr. B. (groaning inwardly) So then
you have changed your mind, have
you?

Mrs. B. Yes, my dear, I find I have
been deceived with fal&longs;e information, or I
would never have advi&longs;ed you to prosecute
the matter &longs;o far.

Mr. B. Well, but how like a fool
&longs;hall I appear to the world, if, after I have
threatened and hectored the&longs;e fellows,
and &longs;pent &longs;o much money to recover my
right, I &longs;hould give it up at this time of
day?

Mrs. B. Why you know, my dear,
that you have formerly made concessions
to them, becau&longs;e I judged it expedient.

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