XIV. (From the Bunkum Flagstaff and Independent Echo. ) Bunkum Museum.
[figure description] Page 106.[end figure description]
Just opened, with 100,000 Curiosities, and performance
in Lecter Room; among which may be found
TWO LIVE BOAR CONSTRICTERS,
Mail and Femail.
ALSO!!
A STRIPED ALGEBRA, STUFT.
BESIDES!!
A PAIR OF SHUTTLE COCKS
AND ONE SHUTTLE HEN—alive
THE!
SWORD WHICH GEN. WELLINGTON FIT WITH
AT THE BATTEL OF WATERLOO! whom is
six feet long and broad in proportion.
WITH!!!
A ENORMOUS RATTLETAIL SNAKE—a regular
whopper!
-- 107 --
[figure description] Page 107.[end figure description]
AND!
THE TUSHES OF A HIPPOTENUSE!
Together with!
A FINGAL TIGER: AND A SPOTTED LEPROSY!
Besides
THE GREAT MORAL SPECTACLE OF
“MOUNT VESUVIUS.”
PART ONE.
Seen opens. Distant Moon. View of Bey of Napels.
A thin smoke rises. It is the Beginning of the Eruction!
The Napels folks begin to travel. Yaller fire, follered by
silent thunder. Awful consternation. Suthin rumbles!
It is the Mounting preparin' to Expectorate! They call
upon the Fire Department. It's no use! Flight of stool-pidgeons.
A cloud of impenetrable smoke hang over the
fated city, through witch the Naplers are seen makin'
tracks. Awful explosion of bulbs, kurbs, torniquets, pin
weels, serpentiles, and terrapins! The Moulting Laver
begins to squash out!
End of Part One.
COMIC SONG.
| The Parochial Beedle |
Mr. Mullet. |
LIVE INJUN ON THE SLACK WIRE.
OBLIGATIONS ON THE CORNUCOPIA, BY
SIGNOR VERMICELLI.
| Signor Vermicelli |
Mr. Mullet. |
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In the course of the evening will be an exhibishun of
Exileratin' Gas! upon a Laffin Highena!
| Laffin Highena |
Mr. Mullet. |
PART TWO.
Bey of Napels voluminated by Gondola Lites. The lava
gushes down. Through the smoke is seen the city in a
state of conflagration. The last family! “Whar is our
parents?” A red hot stone of eleving tuns weight falls
onto 'em. The bearheaded father falls scentless before
the statoo of the Virgin! Denumong!!
The hole to conclude with a
GRAND SHAKSPEARING PYROLIGNEOUS
DISPLAY OF FIREWURX!!
Maroon Bulbs, changing to a spiral weel, witch changes
to the Star of our Union: after, to butiful p'ints of red
lites; to finish with busting into
A BRILLIANT PERSPIRATION!
During the performance a No. of Popular Airs will be
performed on the Scotch Fiddle and Bag-pipes, by a real
Highlander.
| Real Highlander |
Mr. Mullet |
Any boy making a muss, will be injected to once't.
As the Museum is Temperance, no drinkin' aloud, but
anyone will find the best of lickers in the Sloon below.
-- -- p528-126
Cozzens, Frederic S. (Frederic Swartwout), 1818-1869 [1867], The sayings of Dr. Bushwhacker, and other learned men. (A. Simpson & Company, New York) [word count] [eaf528T].
