Clown.
Cor.
And how like you this shepherd's life, Mr.
Touchstone?
-- 49 --
Clo.
Truly, shepherd, in respect of itself, it is a
good life; but in respect that it is a shepherd's life, it
is naught. In respect that it is solitary, I like it very
well; but in respect that it is private, it is a very vile
life. Now in respect it is in the fields, it pleaseth me
well; but in respect it is not in the Court, it is tedious.
As it is a spare life, look you, it fits my humour well;
but as there is no more plenty in it, it goes much
against my stomach. Hast any philosophy in thee,
shepherd?
Cor.
No more, but that I know, the more one
sickens, the worse at ease he is: and that he, that
wants mony, means, and content, is without three
good friends. That the property of rain is to wet,
and fire to burn: that good pasture makes fat sheep;
and that a great cause of the night, is lack of the Sun:
that he, that hath learned no wit by nature nor art,7 note
may complain of good breeding, or comes of a very
dull kindred.
Clo.
Such a one is a natural philosopher.8 note Wast ever
in Court, shepherd?
-- 50 --
Cor.
No, truly.
Clo.
Then thou art damn'd.
Cor.
Nay, I hope—
Clo.
Truly, thou art damn'd, like an ill-rosted egg,9 note
all on one side.
Cor.
For not being at Court? your reason.
Clo.
1 noteWhy, if thou never wast at Court, thou never
saw'st good manners; if thou never saw'st good manners,
then thy manners must be wicked; and wickedness
is sin, and sin is damnation: thou art in a parlous
state, shepherd.
Cor.
Not a whit, Touchstone: those, that are good
manners at the Court, are as ridiculous in the Country,
as the behaviour of the Country is most mockable at
the Court. You told me, you salute not at the Court,
but you kiss your hands; that courtesy would be uncleanly,
if Courtiers were shepherds.
Clo.
Instance, briefly; come, instance.
Cor.
Why, we are still handling our ewes; and their
fels, you know, are greasy.
Clo.
Why, do not your Courtiers' hands sweat? and
is not the grease of a mutton as wholesome as the sweat
of a man? shallow, shallow?—a better instance, I
say: come.
Cor.
Besides, our hands are hard.
-- 51 --
Clo.
Your lips will feel them the sooner. Shallow
again:—a more sounder instance, come.
Cor.
And they are often tarr'd over with the surgery
of our sheep; and would you have us kiss tarr? the
Courtier's hands are perfumed with civet.
Clo.
Most shallow man!—thou worms-meat, in respect
of a good piece of flesh—indeed!—learn of the
wise, and perpend. Civet is of a baser birth than tarr;
the very uncleanly flux of a cat. Mend the instance,
shepherd.
Cor.
You have too courtly a wit for me; I'll rest.
Clo.
Wilt thou rest damn'd; God help thee, shallow
man; God make incision in thee,2 note
thou art raw.
Cor.
Sir, I am a true labourer, I earn that I eat;
get that I wear; owe no man hate, envy no man's happiness;
glad of other men's good, content with my
harm; and the greatest of my pride is, to see my
ewes graze, and my lambs suck.
Clo.
That is another simple sin in you, to bring the
ewes and the rams together; and to offer to get your
living by the copulation of cattle; to be a bawd to a
bell-weather;3 note and to betray a she-lamb of a twelve-month
to a crooked-pated old cuckoldly ram, out of all
reasonable match. If thou be'st not damn'd for this,
the devil himself will have no shepherds; I cannot see
else how thou shouldst 'scape.
Cor.
Here comes young Mr. Ganimed, my new
mistress's brother.
-- 52 --
Samuel Johnson [1765], The plays of William Shakespeare, in eight volumes, with the corrections and illustrations of Various Commentators; To which are added notes by Sam. Johnson (Printed for J. and R. Tonson [and] C. Corbet [etc.], London) [word count] [S11001].
