Tranio stand by.
Bap.
Gentlemen Both, importune me no farther,
For how I firmly am resolv'd, you know;
That is, not to bestow my youngest Daughter,
Before I have a husband for the elder:
If either of you Both love Catharina,
-- 284 --
Because I know you well, and love you well,
Leave shall you have to court her at your pleasure.
Gre.
To cart her rather.—She's too rough for me:
There, there, Hortensio, will you any wife?
Cath.
I pray you, Sir, is it your will
To make a Stale of me amongst these mates?
Hor.
Mates, maid, how mean you that? no mates for you;
Unless you were of gentler milder mould.
Cath.
I'faith, Sir, you shall never need to fear,
I wis, it is not half way to her heart:
But if it were, doubt not, her care shall be
To comb your noddle with a three-legg'd stool,
And paint your face, and use you like a fool.
Hor.
From all such devils, good Lord, deliver us.
Gre.
And me too, good Lord.
Tra. aside.
Hush, master, here's some good pastime toward;
That wench is stark mad, or wonderful froward.
Luc. aside.
But in the other's silence I do see
Maid's mild behaviour and sobriety.
Peace, Tranio.
Tra. aside.
Well said, master; mum! and gaze your fill.
Bap.
Gentlemen, that I may soon make good
What I have said, Bianca, get you in;
And let it not displease thee, good Bianca;
For I will love thee ne'er the less, my girl.
Cath.
A pretty Peat! it is best put finger in the eye,
an she knew why.
Bian.
Sister, content you in my discontent.
Sir, to your pleasure humbly I subscribe:
My books and instruments shall be my company,
On them to look, and practise by my self.
Luc.
Hark, Tranio, thou may'st hear Minerva speak.
[aside.
Hor.
Signior Baptista, will you be so strange?
Sorry am I, that our good will effects
Bianca's grief.
-- 285 --
Gre.
Why will you mew her up,
Signior Baptista, for this fiend of hell,
And make her bear the penance of her tongue?
Bap.
Gentlemen, content ye; I am resolv'd:
Go in, Bianca.—
[Exit Bianca.
And for I know, she taketh most delight
In musick, instruments, and poetry;
School-masters will I keep within my house,
Fit to instruct her youth. If you, Hortensio,
Or Signior Gremio, you, know any such,
Prefer them hither: for to cunning men
I will be very kind; and liberal
To mine own children, in good bringing up;
And so farewel. Catharina, you may stay,
For I have more to commune with Bianca.
[Exit.
Cath.
Why, and, I trust, I may go too, may I
not? what, shall I be appointed hours, as tho', belike,
I knew not what to take, and what to leave? ha!
[Exit.
Gre.
You may go to the devil's dam: your gifts are
so good, here is none will hold you. Our love is not
so great, Hortensio, but we may blow our nails together,
and fast it fairly out. Our cake's dow on both
sides. Farewel; yet for the love I bear my sweet
Bianca, if I can by any means light on a fit man to
teach her That wherein she delights, I will wish him
to her Father.
Hor.
So will I, Signior Gremio: but a word, I pray;
tho' the nature of our quarrel never yet brook'd Parle,
know now, upon advice, it toucheth us Both, that we
may yet again have access to our fair Mistress, and be
happy rivals in Bianca's love, to labour and effect one
thing 'specially.
Gre.
What's that, I pray?
Hor.
Marry, Sir, to get a husband for her sister.
Gre.
A husband! a devil.—
Hor.
I say, a husband.
Gre.
I say, a devil. Think'st thou, Hortensio, tho'
her father be very rich, any man is so very a fool to
be married to hell?
-- 286 --
Hor.
Tush, Gremio; tho' it pass your patience and
mine to endure her loud alarms, why, man, there be
good fellows in the world, an a man could light on
them, would take her with all her faults, and mony
enough.
Gre.
I cannot tell; but I had as lief take her dowry
with this condition, to be whip'd at the high-cross
every morning.
Hor.
'Faith, as you say, there's a small choice in rotten
apples: but, come, since this bar in law makes us
friends, it shall be so far forth friendly maintain'd, 'till
by helping Baptista's eldest daughter to a husband, we
set his youngest free for a husband, and then have to't
afresh. Sweet Bianca! happy man be his dole; he
that runs fastest gets the ring; how say you, Signior
Gremio?
Gre.
I am agreed; and would I had given him the
best horse in Padua to begin his wooing, that would
throughly wooe her, wed her, and bed her, and rid
the house of her. Come on.
[Exeunt Gremio and Hortensio.
Manent Tranio and Lucentio.
Tra.
I pray, Sir, tell me, is it possible
That love should on a sudden take such hold?
Luc.
Oh Tranio, 'till I found it to be true,
I never thought it possible or likely.
But see, while idly I stood looking on,
I found th' effect of Love in idleness.
And now in plainness do confess to thee,
(That art to me as secret, and as dear,
As Anna to the Queen of Carthage was;)
Tranio, I burn, I pine, I perish, Tranio,
If I atchieve not this young modest girl:
Counsel me, Tranio, for, I know, thou canst;
Assist me, Tranio, for, I know, thou wilt.
Tra.
Master, it is no time to chide you now;
Affection is not rated from the heart.
If love hath touch'd you, nought remains but so,
Redime te captum quàm queas minimo.
-- 287 --
Luc.
Gramercy, lad; go forward, this contents;
The rest will comfort, for thy counsel's sound.
Tra.
Master, you look'd so longly on the maid,
Perhaps, you mark'd not what's the pith of all.
Luc.
O yes, I saw sweet Beauty in her face;
Such as the daughter of Agenor had,
That made great Jove to humble him to her hand,
When with his knees he kiss'd the Cretan strand.
Tra.
Saw you no more? mark'd you not, how her sister
Began to scold, and raise up such a storm,
That mortal ears might hardly endure the din?
Luc.
Tranio, I saw her coral lips to move,
And with her breath she did perfume the air;
Sacred and sweet was all I saw in her.—
Tra.
Nay, then 'tis time to stir him from his trance:
I pray, awake, Sir; if you love the maid,
Bend thoughts and wit t' atchieve her. Thus it stands:
Her eldest Sister is so curst and shrewd,
That till the Father rids his Hands of her,
Master, your Love must live a Maid at home;
And therefore has he closely mew'd her up,
Because she shall not be annoy'd with suitors.
Luc.
Ah, Tranio, what a cruel Father's he!
But art thou not advis'd, he took some care
To get her cunning school-masters t' instruct her?
Tra.
Ay, marry, am I, Sir; and now 'tis plotted.
Luc.
I have it, Tranio.
Tra.
Master, for my hand,
Both our inventions meet and jump in one.
Luc.
Tell me thine first.
Tra.
You will be school-master,
And undertake the teaching of the maid:
That's your device.
Luc.
It is: may it be done?
Tra.
Not possible: for who shall bear your part,
And be in Padua here Vincentio's son,
Keep house, and ply his book, welcome his friends,
Visit his countrymen, and banquet them?
-- 288 --
Luc.
Basta;—content thee; for I have it full.
We have not yet been seen in any house,
Nor can we be distinguish'd by our faces,
For man or master: then it follows thus.
Thou shalt be master, Tranio, in my stead;
Keep house, and port, and servants, as I should.
I will some other be, some Florentine,
Some Neapolitan, or meaner man of Pisa.
'Tis hatch'd, and shall be so: Tranio, at once
Uncase thee: take my colour'd hat and cloak.
When Biondello comes, he waits on thee;
But I will charm him first to keep his tongue.
Tra.
So had you need.
[They exchange Habits.
In brief, good Sir, sith it your pleasure is,
And I am tied to be obedient,
(For so your Father charg'd me at our parting;
Be serviceable to my Son, quoth he,)
Altho', I think, 'twas in another sense;
I am content to be Lucentio,
Because so well I love Lucentio.
Luc.
Tranio, be so; because Lucentio loves;
And let me be a slave t'atchieve that Maid,
Whose sudden sight hath thrall'd my wounded eye.
Enter Biondello.
Here comes the rogue. Sirrah, where have you been?
Bion.
Where have I been? nay, how now, where
are you? master, has my fellow Tranio stoll'n your
cloaths, or you stoll'n his, or both? pray, what's the
news?
Luc.
Sirrah, come hither: 'tis no time to jest;
And therefore frame your manners to the time.
Your fellow Tranio here, to save my life,
Puts my apparel and my count'nance on,
And I for my escape have put on his:
For in a quarrel, since I came ashore,
I kill'd a man, and, fear, I am descry'd:
Wait you on him, I charge you, as becomes;
While I make way from hence to save my life.
You understand me?
-- 289 --
Bion.
Ay, Sir, ne'er a whit.—
Luc.
And not a jot of Tranio in your mouth;
Tranio is chang'd into Lucentio.
Bion.
The better for him, would I were so too.
Tra.
So would I, 'faith, boy, to have the next wish
after; that Lucentio, indeed, had Baptista's youngest
Daughter. But, sirrah, not for my sake, but your master's,
I advise you, use your manners discreetly in all
kind of companies: when I am alone, why, then I am
Tranio; but in all places else, your master Lucentio.
Luc.
Tranio, let's go: one thing more rests, that thy
self execute, to make one among these wooers; if
thou ask me why, sufficeth, my reasons are both good
and weighty.
[Exeunt.
Scene 2
SCENE, before Hortensio's House, in Padua.
Enter Petruchio, and Grumio.
Pet.
Verona, for a while I take my leave,
To see my friends in Padua; but of all
My best beloved and approved friend,
Hortensio; and, I trow, this is the house;
Here, sirrah, Grumio, knock, I say.
Gru.
Knock, Sir? whom should I knock? is there
any man, has rebus'd your Worship?
Pet.
Villain, I say, knock me here soundly.
Gru.
Knock you here, Sir? why, Sir, what am I, Sir,
That I should knock you here, Sir?
Pet.
Villain, I say, knock me at this gate,
And rap me well, or I'll knock your knave's pate.
Gru.
My master is grown quarrelsome: I should
knock you first,
And then I know after, who comes by the worst.
Pet.
Will it not be?
Faith, sirrah, an you'll not knock, I'll ring it,
I'll try how you can Sol, Fa, and sing it.
[He wrings him by the Ears.
Gru.
Help, masters, help; my master is mad.
Pet.
Now knock, when I bid you: Sirrah! Villain!
-- 290 --
Enter Hortensio.
Hor.
How now, what's the matter? my old friend
Grumio, and my good friend Petruchio! how do you
all at Verona?
Pet.
Signior Hortensio, come you to part the fray?
Con tutto el Core ben trovato, may I say.
Hor.
Alla nostra Casa ben venuto, molto honorato Signor mio Petruchio.
Rise, Grumio, rise; we will compound this quarrel.
Gru.
Nay, 'tis no matter, what he leges in Latine. If
this be not a lawful cause for me to leave his service,
look you, Sir: he bid me knock him, and rap him
soundly, Sir. Well, was it fit for a servant to use his
master so, being, perhaps, for ought I see, two and
thirty, a pip out?
Whom, would to God, I had well knock'd at first,
Then had not Grumio come by the worst.
Pet.
A senseless villain!—Good Hortensio,
I bid the rascal knock upon your gate,
And could not get him for my heart to do it.
Gru.
Knock at the gate? O heav'ns! spake you not
these words plain? sirrah, knock me here, rap me
here, knock me well, and knock me soundly: and
come you now with knocking at the gate?
Pet.
Sirrah, be gone, or talk not, I advise you.
Hor.
Petruchio, patience; I am Grumio's pledge:
Why, this is a heavy chance 'twixt him and you,
Your ancient, trusty, pleasant servant Grumio;
And tell me now, sweet Friend, what happy Gale
Blows you to Padua here, from old Verona?
Pet.
Such wind as scatters young men through the world,
To seek their fortunes farther than at home;
(8) noteWhere small experience grows, but in a few.
Signior Hortensio, thus it stands with me,
-- 291 --
Antonio my Father is deceas'd;
And I have thrust my self into this maze,
Happly to wive and thrive, as best I may:
Crowns in my purse I have, and goods at home,
And so am come abroad to see the world.
Hor.
Petruchio, shall I then come roundly to thee,
And wish thee to a shrewd ill-favour'd wife?
Thou'dst thank me but a little for my counsel,
And yet, I'll promise thee, she shall be rich,
And very rich: but thou'rt too much my friend,
And I'll not wish thee to her.
Pet.
Signior Hortensio, 'twixt such friends as us
Few words suffice; and therefore if you know
One rich enough to be Petruchio's wife;
(As wealth is burthen of my wooing dance)
Be she as foul as was Florentius' love,
As old as Sibyl, and as curst and shrewd
As Socrates' Xantippe, or a worse,
She moves me not; or not removes, at least,
Affection's edge in me. Were she as rough
As are the swelling Adriatick Seas,
I come to wive it wealthily in Padua:
If wealthily, then happily, in Padua.
Gru.
Nay, look you, Sir, he tells you flatly what
his mind is: why, give him gold enough, and marry
him to a puppet, or an aglet-baby, or an old Trot with
ne'er a tooth in her head, tho' she have as many diseases
as two and fifty horses; why, nothing comes amiss,
so mony comes withal.
Hor.
Petruchio, since we are stept thus far in,
I will continue That I broach'd in jest.
I can, Petruchio, help thee to a wife
With wealth enough, and young and beauteous;
Brought up, as best becomes a gentlewoman.
Her only fault, and that is fault enough,
Is, that she is intolerable curst;
And shrewd, and froward, so beyond all measure,
That, were my state far worser than it is,
I would not wed her for a Mine of gold.
-- 292 --
Pet.
Hortensio, peace; thou know'st not gold's effect;
Tell me her Father's name, and 'tis enough:
For I will board her, tho' she chide as loud
As thunder, when the clouds in Autumn crack.
Hor.
Her Father is Baptista Minola,
An affable and courteous Gentleman;
Her name is Catharina Minola,
Renown'd in Padua for her scolding tongue.
Pet.
I know her Father, tho' I know not her;
And he knew my deceased Father well.
I will not sleep, Hortensio, 'till I see her,
And therefore let me be thus bold with you,
To give you over at this first encounter,
Unless you will accompany me thither.
Gru.
I pray you, Sir, let him go while the humour
lasts. O' my word, an she knew him as well as I do,
she would think scolding would do little good upon
him. She may, perhaps, call him half a score knaves,
or so: why, that's nothing; an he begin once, he'll
rail in his rope-tricks. I'll tell you what, Sir, an she
stand him but a little, he will throw a figure in her
face, and so disfigure her with it, that she shall have
no more eyes to see withal than a cat: you know him
not, Sir.
Hor.
Tarry, Petruchio, I must go with thee,
For in Baptista's house my Treasure is:
He hath the jewel of my life in hold,
His youngest Daughter, beautiful Bianca;
(9) noteAnd her with-holds he from me, and others more
Suitors to her, and Rivals in my love:
Supposing it a thing impossible,
(For those defects I have before rehears'd,)
That ever Catharina will be woo'd;
Therefore this order hath Baptista ta'en,
-- 293 --
That none shall have access unto Bianca,
'Till Catharine the curst have got a husband.
Gru.
Catharine the curst?
A title for a maid of all titles the worst!
Hor.
Now shall my Friend Petruchio do me grace,
And offer me disguis'd in sober robes
To old Baptista as a school-master,
Well seen in musick, to instruct Bianca;
That so I may by this device, at least,
Have leave and leisure to make love to her;
And, unsuspected, court her by her self.
Enter Gremio, and Lucentio disguis'd.
Gru.
Here's no knavery! see, to beguile the old
folks, how the young folks lay their heads together.
Master, look about you: who goes there? ha.
Hor.
Peace, Grumio, 'tis the Rival of my love,
Petruchio, stand by a while.
Gru.
A proper Stripling, and an amorous.—
Gre.
O, very well; I have perus'd the note.
Hark you, Sir, I'll have them very fairly bound,
All books of love; see That, at any hand;
And see, you read no other lectures to her:
You understand me—Over and beside
Signior Baptista's liberality,
I'll mend it with a largess. Take your papers too,
And let me have them very well perfum'd;
For she is sweeter than perfume it self,
To whom they go: what will you read to her?
Luc.
Whate'er I read to her, I'll plead for you,
As for my Patron, stand you so assured;
As firmly, as your self were still in place;
Yea, and, perhaps, with more successful words
Than you, unless you were a scholar, Sir.
Gre.
Oh this learning, what a thing it is!
Gru.
Oh this woodcock, what an ass it is!—
Pet.
Peace, Sirrah.
Hor.
Grumio, mum! God save you, Signior Gremio.
Gre.
And you are well met, Signior Hortensio. Trow
you, whither I am going? to Baptista Minola; I promis'd
-- 294 --
to enquire carefully about a school-master for
the fair Bianca; and by good fortune I have lighted
well on this young man; for Learning and Behaviour
fit for her turn, well read in Poetry, and other books,
good ones, I warrant ye.
Hor.
'Tis well; and I have met a gentleman,
Hath promis'd me to help me to another,
A fine musician to instruct our mistress;
So shall I no whit be behind in duty
To fair Bianca, so belov'd of me.
Gre.
Belov'd of me,—and that my deeds shall prove.
Gru.
And that his bags shall prove.
Hor.
Gremio, 'tis now no time to vent our love.
Listen to me; and, if you speak me fair,
I'll tell you news indifferent good for either.
Here is a Gentleman whom by chance I met,
Upon agreement from us to his liking,
Will undertake to wooe curst Catharine;
Yea, and to marry her, if her dowry please.
Gre.
So said, so done, is well;—
Hortensio, have you told him all her faults?
Pet.
I know, she is an irksome brawling Scold;
If that be all, masters, I hear no harm.
Gre.
No, sayest me so, friend? what Countryman?
Pet.
Born in Verona, old Antonio's Son;
My Father's dead, my fortune lives for me,
And I do hope good days and long to see.
Gre.
Oh, Sir, such a life with such a wife were strange;
But if you have a stomach, to't, o' God's name:
You shall have me assisting you in all.
But will you wooe this wild cat?
Pet.
Will I live?
Gru.
Will he wooe her? ay, or I'll hang her.
Pet.
Why came I hither, but to that intent?
Think you, a little din can daunt my ears?
Have I not in my time heard lions roar?
Have I not heard the sea, puff'd up with winds,
Rage like an angry boar, chafed with sweat?
Have I not heard great Ordnance in the field?
And heav'n's artillery thunder in the skies?
-- 295 --
Have I not in a pitched battel heard
Loud larums, neighing steeds, and trumpets clangue?
And do you tell me of a woman's tongue,
That gives not half so great a blow to hear,
As will a chesnut in a farmer's fire?
Tush, tush, fear boys with bugs.
Gru.
For he fears none.—
Gre.
Hortensio, hark:
This Gentleman is happily arriv'd,
My mind presumes, for his own good, and ours.
Hor.
I promis'd, we would be contributors;
And bear his charge of wooing whatsoe'er.
Gre.
And so we will, provided that he win her.
Gru.
I would, I were as sure of a good dinner.
To them Tranio bravely apparell'd, and Biondello.
Tra.
Gentlemen, God save you. If I may be bold,
tell me, I beseech you, which is the readiest way to
the house of Signior Baptista Minola?
Bion.
He, that has the two fair Daughters? is't he
you mean?
Tra.
Even he, Biondello.
Gre.
Hark you, Sir, you mean not her, to—
Tra.
Perhaps, him and her; what have you to do?
Pet.
Nor her that chides, Sir, at any hand, I pray.
Tra.
I love no chiders, Sir: Biondello, let's away.
Luc.
Well begun, Tranio.
Hor.
Sir, a word ere you go:
Are you a suitor to the maid you talk of, yea or no?
Tra.
An if I be, Sir, is it any offence?
Gre.
No; if without more words you will get you hence.
Tra.
Why, Sir, I pray, are not the streets as free
For me, as for you?
Gre.
But so is not she.
Tra.
For what reason, I beseech you?
Gre.
For this reason, if you'll know:
That she's the choice love of Signior Gremio.
Hor.
That she's the chosen of Signior Hortensio.
Tra.
Softly, my masters; if you be gentlemen,
Do me this Right; hear me with patience.
-- 296 --
Baptista is a noble Gentleman,
To whom my Father is not all unknown;
And, were his Daughter fairer than she is,
She may more suitors have, and me for one.
Fair Leda's Daughter had a thousand wooers;
Then well One more may fair Bianca have,
And so she shall. Lucentio shall make one,
Tho' Paris came, in hope to speed alone.
Gre.
What, this Gentleman will out-talk us all!
Luc.
Sir, give him head; I know, he'll prove a jade.
Pet.
Hortensio, to what end are all these words?
Hor.
Sir, let me be so bold as to ask you,
Did you yet ever see Baptista's Daughter?
Tra.
No, Sir; but, hear I do, that he hath two:
The one as famous for a scolding tongue,
As the other is for beauteous modesty.
Pet.
Sir, Sir, the first's for me; let her go by.
Gre.
Yea, leave that labour to great Hercules;
And let it be more than Alcides' twelve.
Pet.
Sir, understand you this of me, insooth:
The youngest Daughter, whom you hearken for,
Her Father keeps from all access of suitors,
And will not promise her to any man,
Until the eldest Sister first be wed:
The younger then is free, and not before.
Tra.
If it be so, Sir, that you are the man
Must steed us all, and me amongst the rest;
And if you break the ice, and do this feat,
Atchieve the elder, set the younger free
For our access; whose hap shall be to have her,
Will not so graceless be, to be ingrate.
Hor.
Sir, you say well, and well you do conceive:
And since you do profess to be a suitor,
You must, as we do, gratifie this Gentleman,
To whom we all rest generally beholden.
Tra.
(10) note
Sir, I shall not be slack; in sign whereof,
Please ye, we may convive this afternoon,
-- 297 --
And quaff carouses to our Mistress' health;
And do as adversaries do in law,
Strive mightily, but eat and drink as friends.
Gru. Bion.
O excellent motion: fellows, let's be gone.
Hor.
The motion's good indeed, and be it so,
Petruchio, I shall be your ben venuto.
[Exeunt.
[The Presenters, above, speak here.
1 Man.
My Lord, you nod; you do not mind the Play.
Sly.
Yea, by St. Ann, do I: a good matter, surely!
comes there any more of it?
Lady.
My Lord, 'tis but begun.
Sly.
'Tis a very excellent piece of work, Madam Lady.
Would 'twere done!—
-- 298 --
Lewis Theobald [1733], The works of Shakespeare: in seven volumes. Collated with the Oldest Copies, and Corrected; With notes, Explanatory and Critical; By Mr. Theobald (Printed for A. Bettesworth and C. Hitch [and] J. Tonson [etc.], London) [word count] [S11201].
