Sauny.
Pet.
Sirrah, wait on your Mistriss; Say what you will to her, and
Vex her, but do not touch her; and let her have no Meat
I Charge ye.
Saun.
S'breed Sir, send her into the Highlands in Scotland, there's Hunger
and Caud enough, there she may starve her Bally foo.
Pet.
Well Sirrah, Doe as I direct you.
(Exit.
Saun.
O' my Saul wull I Sir, Yee'l let me take my Head-piece to defend
me Sir.
Enter Margaret.
Marg.
What Gregory, Phillip! No Body near me?
Sawny, Where are you?
Saun.
Is'e een hard at your Arse Madam.
Marg.
Where's your Master?
Saun.
He's gone to the Market himself, and he'l bring ye heam a Braw
Bull's Puzzle to Swaddle your Weam with.
Marg.
And in the mean time I am Famisht; Was ever Woman us'd so Damnably?
I am Starv'd for Meat, Giddy for want of Sleep; and that which
Spites me more then all the rest, is, he pretends 'tis out of Care and
Love to me: Prithee good Sawny give me some Meat.
Saun.
O' my Saul, Sawndy wou'd be Hang'd gin I sud bestow an aw'd
Liquor'd Bute, Sawny will cut it into Tripes to Stuff your Weam with.
Marg.
Good Sawny, here's Money for thee, but one little bit of any
thing to stay my fainting Spirits.
Saun.
What will ye eat a Bit of Beefe?
Marg,
I, good Sawny.
Saun.
Will ye eat some Mustard to't?
Saun.
I, good Sawny, quickly.
Saun.
Mustard is nea gu'd for your Tang, 'twill make it tea keen, and
ye can Scau'd fast enough without.
Marg.
Why then the Beef without Mustard.
Saun.
Gud Beef is nee gued without Mustard: Sawny will fetch ye some
Meal and Water, ye'st make ye a Scotch Pudding, ye'st Eat of that tull
your Weam crack.
Marg.
You Abusive Rogue take that,
(Beat him.)
Must I be Brav'd thus by my own Servant.
Saun.
The Dee'l wash your Face with a Fou Clout.
-- 27 --
Enter Geraldo.
Geral.
Why how now, Sirrah, VVill you strike your Mistriss? You
Cowardly Rogue strike a VVoman.
Saun.
S'breed Sir, D'ye Caw a Scotchman a Coward? Gin Is'e had ye
in Scotland, Is'e put my Whinyard in your Weam, gin ye were as stout
as Gilderoy.
Geral.
VVhy Gilderoy was as arrant a Coward as thou art.
Saun.
VVuns yeed be lath to keep the Grund that Gilderoy quits; yet
I must confess he was a little Shame-fac'd before the Enemy.
Marg.
O Mr. Geraldo, never was Poor VVoman so us'd. For Charity
sake Convey me home to my Father.
Enter Petruchio with a Dish of Meat.
Petru.
Here Peg, here's Meat for thee, I have Drest it my self, my Dear;
Geraldo VVellcome, this was kindly done to Visit Peg and Me; Come Peg,
fall too, here's an Excellent piece of Veal.
Marg.
VVhy 'tis a Pullet.
Pet.
VVhy 'tis Veal, Art thou Mad?
Marg.
You won't Perswade me out of my Sences,
'Tis a Pullet.
Saun.
A Gud is it Sir.
Petr.
VVhat an unhappy Man am I, my poor Dear Peg's Distracted. I
always fear'd 'twould come to this. Take the Meat away Curtis; Is the
Room Ready as I Order'd? Are the Lights Damn'd up?
Curtis.
Yes Sir.
Marg.
VVhy what d'ye mean to do with me?
Pet.
Poor Peg, I Pitty thee; but thou shalt want no Help for thy Cure,
you must be kept from the Light, it troubles the Brain.
Ger.
I see I shall Learn, he's an Excellent Teacher.
Marg.
VVhy Sir, Pray tell me, Have you a mind to make me Mad?
this is the way indeed: How have I injur'd you, that you use me thus inhumanely?
Did you Marry me to starve me?
Saun.
He means to bring down your VVeam for a Race; For we awways
Cry a Nag with a VVeam, but a Mare with Nean.
Pet.
No, no; Good Peg thou know'st I have a Care of thee; Here's a
Gown just brought home for thee Peg. Now thou art empty, it will sit
Handsomely; VVhere is this Taylor? Call him in Sawny, if it fits you,
you shall put it on, and wee'l Gallop o're to London, and see your Father;
Your Sisters VVedding is at hand, you must help her.
Enter Taylor with a Gown.
Marg.
If she be Match'd as I am, Heaven help her! But there's some
Comfort in going Home; there's Meat and Sleeping-room.
-- 28 --
Pet.
Come Taylor, lets see the Gowne, How now what's here? Bless
me, what Masquing Suite is this! What's this a Sleve? why 'tis like a
Demmy Cannon, Why what a Devil Taylor dost thou mean? Is this a
Gown?
Tay.
A gown Sir? yes Sir, and a handsome Gown as any Man in London
can make, 'tis the newest Fashon lately come out of France.
Pet.
What a lying knave art thou! my great Grand-mothers Picture
in the Matted Gallery is just such another.
Saun.
It is like the Picture of Queen Margaret in Edenbrough Castle,
Sir.
Marg.
I never saw a better Fashon'd Gown in my life; more quaint
nor better shap'd, I like the Gown, and I'll have this Gown or I'll have
none; say what you will I like it, 'tis a handsom Gown.
Pet.
Why thou sayst true Peg, 'tis an ugly paltrey Gown, I am glad to
hear thee of my mind; 'tis a beastly Gown.
Marg.
Why I say 'tis a good Gown, a handsome fashionable Gown;
What d'ye mean to make a Puppet of me?
Pet.
Ay, this fellow wou'd make a Puppet of thee?
Tay.
She says your Worship means to make a Puppet of her.
Pet.
Thou Impudent, lying, Threed, Bodkin and Thimble, Flea, thou
nit, brave me in my own house? Go take it, I'll ha none on't.
Tay.
Sir I made it according to your Directions, and I cannot take it
again.
Saun.
Tak it awaw, or the Deel O my Luggs, but yest tak my Whineyard.
Marg.
He shall not take it agen, what need you trouble your self about
it, as long as it pleases me; lay it down there.
Pet.
Sirrah take it away I say, we shall find more Taylors; I wont have
my Wife so Antickly drest, that the Boys shoud hoot at her.
Marg.
Come, come, all this is but fooling, you dont understand what
belongs to a Gown, say what you will I'm resolv'd to have it, if it were an
ugly one I wou'd wear it, and it were but to Cross you.
Saun.
Now the Deel's a cruppen untell her Mouth Sir, you may see a
little of his Tail hang out, it looks for aw the world an it were a Sting Sir.
Pet.
Why that's my good Peg, I know thou dost not care for it; say no
more prithee, thou shalt have another.
Marg.
I know not what you mean to do with me, but methinks I might
have leave to speak, and speak I will, I am no Child, no Baby; your Betters
have endur'd me to speak my mind, and if you cannot you had best stop
your Ears; 'Tis better set my Tongue at Liberty, then lee my Heart break.
Pet.
Speak Peg, by all means, say what thou wilt; Sirrah carry that tawdry
thing away, Geraldo tell him you'll see him paid, [Aside.] and bid him
leave it. Come what sayst thou Peg?
Ger.
Leave the Gown in the next Room Taylor, and take no notice of
what he says, I'll see you paid for't.
[Aside.
Exit.
Marg.
Why I say I will have that Gown, and every thing I have a mind
for; I did not bring you such a Portion to be made a Fool of.
-- 29 --
Pet.
Very true, thou'rt in the right Peg; come lets to Horse, these Cloaths
will serve turn at present till we can get better. Go Sirrah lead the Horses
to the Lands end, thether we'll walk a foot; lets see, I think 'tis about seven
a Clock, we shall reach to my Father in Laws by Dinner time with Ease.
Marg.
'Tis almost Two, you cannot get thether by Supper time.
Pet.
It shall be seaven e're I go, why what a Mischief's this, what I say or
do, you are still crossing it; Let the Horses alone, I will not go to day, and
e're I do it shall be what a Clock I please.
Marg.
Nay Sir, that shant stop our Journey, 'tis seaven, or two or nine,
or what a Clock you please, pray lets go.
Saun.
Ye's have it what hour you wull Sir.
Pet.
Very well it is so, get ready quickly; Come Geraldo let's all go, we
shall help mend the Mirth at my Sisters Wedding.
Ger.
I'll wait on you.
Pet.
Come Peg, get on your things.
Marg.
Let me but once see Lincolns-Inn-Fields agen, and Yet thou shalt not
Tame me.
Enter Tranio and Snatchpenny.
Tran.
Now Sirrah, be but Impudent enough and keep state like the old
Knight, and thou art made for ever.
Snatch.
I warrant ye Sir, I know it to a hair, my Lord Beaufoy and I were
School fellows together at Worster; my Estate lyes in the Vale of Evesham,
Three thousand Pound a year, and Fifteen hundred a year I settle upon you
upon the Marriage, let me alone I am Sir Lyonell himself.
Tran.
Right, right; Excellent brave, How now.
Enter Jamy.
Jam.
To your Postures old Sinner, be an exquesite Rascal, and then thou
shalt be a Rogue Paramount; thou shalt lay the Dragon asleep while my
Master steals the Pippins.
Tran.
Well Jamy, What hast thou done?
Jam.
I have been with my Lord Beaufoy, presented your Fathers, and
your Service to him, and told him the old Knight was happily come to
Town, and hearing of your Love to Biancha, was so overjoy'd, he would
Settle all upon you.
Tran.
Well, and what said he?
Jam.
He gave me a Peece for my News, I told him Sir Lyonell desired
his Company just now to treat upon the Match; he's coming in all hast, he
longs to be Couzend, and Snatchpenny if thou dost not do it.
Snatch.
Then hang me.
Jam.
Mum look to't, he's here.
Enter Beaufoy and Winlove.
Beau.
Mr. Winlove your Man tells me your Father is just happily come to
Town, Where is he?
-- 30 --
Tran.
Here Sir, this is my Father; Time has been too Bold to weare ye
out of each others Memory.
Snatch.
Is this my Lord Beaufoy, Sir?
Tran.
Yes Sir.
Snatch.
My Lord your humble Servant; I'm happy at last to meet a
Person I have formerly so much Lov'd.
Beau.
Noble Sir Lyonell I joy to see you.
Snatch.
O the merry Days that you and I have seen my Lord; Well fare
the good old times I say.
Beau.
I Sir Lyonell, when you and I were acquainted first.
Snatch.
I marry, there were Golden Days, indeed, no Couzening, no
Cheating, the World is alter'd.
Beau.
But we will remember these times, and be honest still.
Snatch.
That's een the best way, there's hopes we may have honest Grand
Children too, if all be true as I hear, my Son tells me, your Daughter has
made a Captive of him.
Beau.
I wou'd she were better for his sake, she's a good Girle, and a
handsome one, though I say it; if she were not, I wou'd give her somewhat
shou'd make her so.
Tran.
It takes Rarely.
Snatch.
I'm even overjoy'd that you think my Son worthy your Allyance,
I'll give something they shall make a shift to Live on; in Plain and in breif,
if you'll approve of it, I'll settle Fifteen hundred Pound a year upon him
at Present, which shall be her Joynture; after my Death, all I have with a
good will, What say you my Lord?
Beau.
Sir Lyonell, Your Freedome pleas's me; I see you are an honest
meaning Gentleman: The Young Folks (if I am not mistaken) like one another.
VVell, I say no more, it is a Match.
Tran.
You bind me to you Ever: Now I may boldly say, I am truly
happy: VVhere will you please to have the business made up?
Beau.
Not in my House, Son; I wou'd have it Private; Pitchers have
Eares, and I have many Servants; Besides, Old VVoodall will be hindring
of us; He's hearkening still, and will be interrupting.
Tran.
Then at my Lodging; there my Father Lyes, and there the Business
may be all Dispatch'd: Send for your Daughter by this Gentleman;
my Boy shall fetch a Scrivener presently. The worst on't is, 'tis too
small a VVarning. You are like to have but slender Entertainment.
Beau.
No matter, no matter; I shall like it.
Snat.
I wou'd feign see your Daughter, my Lord; I have heard great
Commendations of her.
Beau.
That you shall presently; Mounsier, pray go to Biancha, and tell
her from me, She must come hither with you immediately; you may
tell her too, if you will, what has hapned, and that she must prepare to
be Mr. VVinlove's Bride.
VVin.
My Lord, me vil fetch her presant.
Tran.
My Lord, VVill your Lordship please to walk in with my Father,
this is my Lodging.
-- 31 --
Bea.
I Sir; Come Sir Lyonell, I'll follow you.
Snat.
Good my Lord, I will wait upon you.
(Exit. Beaufoy, Snat. Tra.
VVin.
Thus far 'tis well Carry'd on Jamy; But how shall we prosecute it?
Jam.
VVhy there is but one way in the VVorld, Sir.
VVin.
And what's that?
Jam.
VVhy thus, I have got a Parson ready for the Purpose; when
you have got Biancha abroad, whip her into Covent-Garden Church, and
there Marry her, and your VVork's done.
Win.
Troth thou say'st true; But is the Parson Orthodox and Canonical?
I wou'd not have an Obadiah to make us enter into Covenant of Matrimony.
Jam.
Trust me Sir, he's as true as Steel; he says all Matrimony without
Book; he can Christen, Wed, and Bury Blindfold.
VVin.
Well, I'll take thy Counsel, if I can perswade her to't, as I
hope I shall, for I know she Loves me; fair Luck betides me; But who
comes here.
Enter Woodall.
Jam.
'Tis the Olp Grub VVoodall; What shall we do with him?
VVin.
We must contrive some way to get him off.
VVood.
I don't like those shuffling matters; I doubt there's some false
Play towards me in hand: Here's my Monsieur he may Informe me—
Mounsieur.
VVin.
Che Dict a vouz Mounsieur. Mounsieur, Your Servant.
VVood.
Mounsieur, Prithee tell me, if thou canst, how Affaires go, things
are carry'd very closely; How stands my Mistriss affected?
VVin.
Moy foy Mounsieur; Me tell you de bad News in the Varle, Madamoselle
Biancha no stand Affected to you at all. My Lord has sent me
to fetch her just now to be Marry to Mounsieur Vat you call? Mounsieur Le—
VVood.
What not to VVinlove
VVin.
Yes to Mounsieur VVinlove; Begar me be very sorry, but me
canno help dat.
VVood.
Is Old Beaufoy mad to Match her to him without his Father's
Privity.
VVin.
Here be de ver Fine Old Man new come to Town, me Lord
be wid him now.
Wood.
Upon my Life old Sir Lyonell, nay then she's lost quite; Hark you
Mounsier, yet 'tis in your Power to make me a happy Man.
Win.
O Mounsier me be your humble Servant.
Wood.
Why look you, you are to fetch her; here's forty Pound in Gold
to buy you a pair of Gloves, let me take her from you, as you are carrying
her thither: I will have two or three with me, and you may saftly say she
was forc'd from you.
Win.
Mounsier begarr, me do you all de Service in the Varle, but me
sal be the grand, Sheat Knave then.
-- 32 --
Wood.
That's nothing, here's more Money, I'll save you harmless; Come,
you shall do it.
VVin.
Mounsier me have no mind to be van Knave, but to do you Service,
if you will meet me upon de Street.
VVood.
Fear not I'll secure you, honest Mounsieur farewell; I will be your
Friend for Ever.
Exit.
Win.
Ha, ha, ha, this is rare; What an Ass this Fellow will make himself,
do what we can? Here Jamy, thou shalt share with me.
Jam.
Thank you Sir; Wou'd we had such a Windfall every day:
But come, Sir, you must make haste, this is the Critical Minute; if you
miss it, you lose Biancha.
Win.
Thy Counsel's good, away; I'll buy a Ring, and Pay the Priest
with some of Woodall's Money, Ha, ha, hah.
[Exeunt.
Enter Petruchio, Margaret, Geraldo and Sawny.
Pet.
Walk your Horses down the Hill before, we shall reach London
time enough, 'tis a fair Night; How bright and goodly the Moon shines.
Marg.
The Moon! the Sun, 'tis not the Moon-light now.
Pet.
I say 'tis the Moon that Shines so Bright.
Marg.
I say 'tis the Sun that shines so Bright.
Pet.
Now by my Mothers Son, and that's my Self, it shall be the Moonlight,
or what I please, before you set Sight of your Father's House; Sirrah,
go fetch the Horses back; Evermore Crost, and Crost, and nothing
but Crost?
Ger.
Say, as he sayes, or we shall never go.
Marg.
Forward, I Pray Sir, since we are come so far; And be it
Sun or Moon, or what you please; Nay, if you call it a Rush-Candle,
henceforth it shall be so for me.
Pet.
I say 'tis the Moon.
Saun.
S'breed, but I say nay, Sir, Out, out, a Lies.
Marg.
I know 'tis the Moon.
Pet.
Nay then you Lie, 'tis the Blessed Sun.
Marg.
Why Heaven be Blest for it, 'tis even what you have a mind to;
Pray let us forward.
Gera.
Petruchio, go thy wayes, the Field is Won.
Pet.
Well, forward, forward; Now the Bowl runs with a Right Byas,
but soft, here's Company.
Enter Sir Lyonell Winlove.
Sir Lyo.
Boy, Bid the Coachman drive gently down the Hill; I wonder
I meet nor overtake no Passengers to day; stay, I think here be some.
Pet.
I will have one bout more with thee Peg; Good-morrow Gentle
Lady; Which way Travel you? Come hither Peg; Didst thou ever behold
so Exquisite a Beauty as this Fair Virgin beares about. Go to her
Peg, and Salute her.
-- 33 --
Marg.
Are you Mad, 'tis an Old Man.
Pet.
Beat back agen then, still Cross? Will you do it?
Saun.
Why i'th' Deel's Name, What mean ye? it's nea bonny Lass Sir;
S'breed, it's an aw faw Thefe.
Gera.
He'll make this Old Man Mad.
Marg.
You Budding Virgin, so fair, so sweet, so fresh, which way Travel
you? How happy shou'd we be in the Enjoyment of so fair a Fellow
Traveller.
Saun.
The Dee'l has built a Bird's Nest in your Head; Gud ye'r as
mad as he; and he as Mad as gin he were the Son of a March Hare, Sir.
Sir Lyon.
Why what do ye mean Gentlewoman?
Pet.
Why now now Peg, I hope thou art not Mad: A Virgin Quotha!
'tis an Old Wrinckled Wither'd Man.
Marg.
Reverend Sir, Pardon my mistaking eyes, that have been so dazled
with the Moon (Sun I mean.) I cou'd not distinguish you; I now perceive
you are a Grave Old Man, pray excuse me.
Sir Lyo.
Indeed you are a Merry Lady; your encounter has amaz'd
me. But I like such Chearful Company; I am for London to see a Son
of mine, that went lately from me thither.
Pet.
We shall be glad of your Company; you must pardon my Wifes
Errour, she has not slept well to Night; and I cou'd not perswade her,
but she wou'd come out Fasting, which makes her Fancy a little extravagant.
Saun.
The Dee'l O' my Saul but you are a false Trundle Taile Tike, the
Dee'l a bit hee'd lat her eat these three days Sir.
Marg.
Curse upon your Excuse, and the Cause of it; I cou'd have eaten
my Shooe-Soules, if I might have had 'em Fry'd.
Pet.
Your Name I beseech you Sir.
Sir Lio.
I am Call'd, Sir Lyonell Winlove in the Country.
Pet.
Father to young Mr. Winlove?
Sir Lyo.
The same Sir.
Pet.
Then I am happy indeed to have met you; I can tell you some
News, perhaps may not be Unwelcome to you. Your Son is in a fair
probability of Calling me Brother within these Two dayes.
Sir Lyo.
How so, I pray Sir.
Pet.
Why he's upon Marrying my Wifes Sister, my Lord Beaufoyes youngest
Daughter. A brave Match, I can assure you, and a Sweet Bedfellow.
Saun.
Gud she's tea gued for any man but Saundy; Gud Gin poor Saundy
had her in Scotland, Wun's I'de sea Swing her about.
Sir Lyo.
You Amaze me! Is this true? or have you a mind, like a pleasant
Traveller, to break a Jest on the Company you overtake?
Gera.
Upon my Word, Sir, 'tis very true; 'twas so design'd; but I
don't think he'll Marry her, he's Forsworn if he do.
Sir Lyo.
You make me Wonder more and more.
Pet.
Mind him not, he's a Party Concern'd, 'tis true.
Sir Lyon.
Pray Gentlemen let's make haste, I must look after this Business,
it soundes strangely, he wou'd not do't without my Consent; he's my
-- 34 --
only Son, my Heir, the Prop of my Family, I must be careful.
Pet.
I see you are Jealous Sir; but you need not; he cannot have a
better Match.
Sir Lyo.
I doubt it not, if all be fair; I should be glad of my Lord
Beaufoyes Allyance, he was my School-fellow; but Time, I doubt, has worn
out our Old Acquaintance: Gentlemen, I must hasten to prevent the
worst.
Saun.
What mean ye Sir? Yea will nea bawk the Bonna Lad, and tak
fro his mattle Sir.
Gera.
Well, Petruchio, thou hast put me in a Heat, have at my Widdow
now.
(Exeunt.
Enter Winlove, Biancha, Jamy.
VVin.
How good you are my Faire one: Jamy, Ar't sure the Priest is
ready for us?
Jam.
I warrant you Sir; Pray make hast, some Devil or other may come
else and Cross it. Don't stay Thrumming of Caps; Here, Body o' me
away, here's VVoodall, shift for your selves, all will be spoyl'd else.
(Exit. Win. and Bian.
Enter Woodall with 3 or 4 Fellows.
VVood.
Be sure you seize on her, and Clap her into a Chair, and one stop
her mouth; fear not, I'll save you harmless.
1st. Fellow.
I warrant you Sir.
Wood.
What a Devil makes this Rogue Poaching here?
Jam.
Tum, te Dum, te Dum; Sing Old Coale of London.
[Sings.
Wood.
Now Jamy, What Walk you here for.
Jam.
Why to look about me; Te Dum, te Dum, &c,
Wood.
They say your Master is to be Marry'd to Madam Biancha to day.
Jam.
Why then we'll be merry at Night; Te Dum, te Dum, &c.
VVood.
The Rogue won't be gone; What, Hast no Business? Thou
look'st as if thou hadst not Drank to day, there's something for thee,
go get thy Mornings Draught.
Jam.
I thank your Worship: Will you take part of a Pot of Ale and
a Toast.
Wood.
No Sirrah, I Drank Coffee this morning.
[Exit Jamy.
So, he's gone; I wonder Mounsieur appears not with Biancha.
Enter Petruchio, Margaret, Sir Lyonell, Geraldo, and Sauny, with Attendants.
Wood.
Ha, Who comes there?
Geral.
Now you are there I'll take my Leave; Your Servant.
(Exit.
Petr.
Sir Lyonell, you are Wellcome to Town; There's your Sons
Lodgings; my Father Lives on the other side; thither we must, and therefore
here I take my Leave.
-- 35 --
Sir Lyo.
Pray, stay a little, may be he's not within; if so, I'll wait upon
you to the Lord Beaufoy.
Saun.
O' my Saul, nea ean cou'd have Beg'd (Knocks.) Dunner better
then this awd Theife has done.
Wood.
They are all busy within Sir, you must Knock Louder if you mean
to be heard.
[Snatchpenny Above.
Snat.
Who is that Knocks, as if he wou'd Beat down the Gate.
Sir Lyon.
Is Mr. Winlove within?
Snatch.
He is within, but not to be spoken with.
Sir Lyon.
What if a Man bring him a Hundred Pounds or Two, to make
Merry withall.
Snat.
Keep your Hundred Pounds for your self, he shall need none as long
as I Live.
Pet.
Nay, I told you, Sir, Your Son was well Belov'd in London. D'ye
hear Sir, leaving your Frivelous Circumstances, pray tell him, His Father's
just now come out of the Countrey to see him, and is here at the Door to
speak with him.
Snat.
That is a Lye Sir; his Father came to Town yesterday, and is now
here Looking out at Window.
Sir Lyo.
The Devil he is; Are you his Father?
Snat.
I Sir; so his Mother says, if I may believe her.
Saun.
Can they Hang him for having twa Fathers Sir? Gud and 'twas
sea, poor Sawndy wou'd be Hang'd sure enough.
Pet.
Why, Hast thou Two Fathers?
Saun.
Gud have I, and Twa, and Twa to that Sir.
Pet.
Why how now Gentlemen, this is flat Knavery, to take another
Man's Name upon you.
Snat.
Lay hands upon this Villain, I believe he means to Cheat some body
here, under my Counter-Name,
Enter Jamy.
Jam.
I have seen the Church on their Back, send them Good Speeding:
Ha, how now, my Old Master Sir Lyonell? S'foot, we are all lost, undone;
I must Brazen it out.
Sir Lyon.
Come hither Crack Hemp.
Jam.
You may save me that Labour, and come to me, if you have any
thing to say to me.
Sir Lyon.
Gome hither you Rogue, What have you forgot me?
Jam.
Forgot you Sir? I cou'd not forget you; for I never saw you in
all my Life before.
Sir Lyon.
You notorious Villain, Didst thou never see thy Master's Father,
Sir Lyonell Winlove?
Jam.
What my Worshipfull Old Master? Yes marry Sir: See where
his Worship Looks out of the Window.
Sir Lyon.
Does he so Sir? I'll make you find him below stayres.
(Beats him.
-- 36 --
Jam.
Help, help, here's a Mad-man will Murder me.
Saun.
Dea Caw your sel Jamy? And wull ye be Beten by an aw faw
Theefe? An yea Caw your sel Jamy eance meare, I'se bang ye tea
Clootes, breed a Gud will I Sir.
Snat.
Help Son, help Brother Beaufoy, Jamy will be kill'd.
Pet.
Prethee Peg stand by to see this Controversy.
Enter Snatchpenny with Servants, Beaufoy and Tranio.
Tran.
'Sheart 'tis Sir Lyonell; but we must bear it a little time: Sir,
What are you that offer to Beat my Servant?
Sir Lyon.
What am I, Sir; Nay, What are you, Sir? O Heaven what
do I see! O fine Villains, I'me undone, while I play the Good Husband at
home in the Countrey, my Son, and my Servants spend my Estate Lavishly
at London.
Saun.
Your Son sal allow you Siller to keep an Awd Wutch to rub your
Shins; And what to anger wou'd ye ha meer Sir.
Tran.
How now, What's the Matter?
Beau.
Is the Man Frantick?
Tran.
Sir, You seem a sober Antient Gentleman by your Habit; but your
Words shew you a Madman: Why Sir, What Concerns it you what Rich
Cloaths I wear? I thank my good Father, I am able to maintain it.
Sir Lyon.
Thy Father! O Villain! he's a Hemp-dresser in Partha.
Saun.
Mara the Deel stuff his Wem fow a Hemp, and his Dam Spin it
out at his Arse.
Beau.
You mistake, you mistake; VVhat d'ye think his Name is?
Sir Lyon.
His Name; as if I knew not his Name; I have Bred him up
e're since he was Three Years old, and his Name is Tranio.
Snatch.
Away, away, mad Ass, his Name is Winlove; my only Son, and
Heir to all my Estate in the Vale of Evesham.
Sir Lyon.
Heavens! he has murther'd his Master; lay hold on him, I
charge you in the King's Name, O my Son, tell me thou, Villain, Where
is my Son VVinlove?
Tran.
Run for an Officer to carry this mad Knave to the Jayle; Lay hold
on him I charge ye, and see him forth-coming.
Saun.
Awa, awa with the Hampdresser Sir.
Sir Lyon.
Carry me to the Jayle ye Villaines!
Pet.
Hold Gentlemen; Your Blessing Father.
Beau.
Son Petruchio VVellcome. You have it, and you Peg, how d'ye?
Know ye any thing of this matter?
Pet.
My Lord, take heed what you do; so much I know, I dare Swear
this is Sir Lyonell VVinlove, and that a Counterfeit.
Saun.
VVuns, I think sea tea, gud an ye please I'se take the Covenant
on't.
VVood.
So durst I Swear too almost.
Snat.
Swear if thou durst.
-- 37 --
VVood.
Sir I dare not Swear Point Blank.
Tran.
You had best Swear, I am not VVinlove neither.
VVood.
Yes, I know you to be Mr. VVinlove.
Beau.
Away with the Doater'd, to the Jayle with him.
Sir Lyon.
Are you all setled to do mischief to me? VVhy my Lord
Beaufoy methinks you might know me.
Tran.
Away with him to my Lodgings for the present, 'till we can get
a Constable to charge him upon, we shall have a hubbub in the Streets, drag
him I say.
Sir. Lyon.
Rogues, Villains, Murderers! I shall have Justice.
[Exit with Sir Lyonell.
Wood.
These are strange Passages, I know not what to think, of 'em; but
I am glad Biancha came not when they were here, sure my Mounsier will
not fail me.
Enter Winlove and Biancha.
Win.
Now my Biancha I am truly Happy, our Loves shall like the Spring
be ever growing.
Bian.
But how shall we Escape my Fathers Anger.
Win.
Fear not, I'll warrant thee.
Wood.
O here's Biancha, how now Mounsier brave, What fancy's this?
Win.
O Mounsieur te Vous la Menes, How d'ye do good Mr. Woodall, how
d'ye like my new Bride?
Wood.
How, how, how, Sir, your Bride? Seize on her quickly.
Win.
Hands off, she's my Wife, touch her who dares; Will you have your
Teeth pickt? What d'ye think of giving 20 Peeces to teach your Mistriss
French.
Wood.
O Rogue, I'll have thee hang'd.
VVin.
Or 40 Peeces to buy a Pair of Gloves, to let you Steal Madam
Biancha: this Ring was bought with some of it, ha, ha, ha.
Wood.
Down with him, down with him, a damn'd Rascal.
Win.
I, do, Which of you has a mind to breath a Vein?
2 Fell.
Nay if she be his Wife we dare not touch her.
Wood.
I'll fetch some body that shall, O Devil.
Exit.
VVin.
Ay do, I am your poor Mounsieur, ha, ha, ha; Fear not Biancha, he'll
fetch 'em all I know, I warrant thee we shall appease thy Father Easily.
Bian.
Trust me Sir, I fear the Storm.
Enter Beaufoy, Tranio, Petruchio, Margaret, Sauny, Snatchpenny,
Jamy, Sir Lyonell, Woodall, and Attendants.
VVood.
That Rogue, that Damn'd Counterfit Frenchman has stolne your
Daughter and Marryed her, here they are.
VVin.
Bless me, What do I see yonder my Father, in earnest? Dear Sir
your Blessing, and your Pardon.
Sir Lyon.
My Dear Son, Art thou alive? then take it.
Bian.
I must beg your Pardon too Sir.
-- 38 --
VVin.
And I most Honoured Father.
Beau.
Why what's the Matter? What hast thou done? VVoodall tells me
thou hast Married the Frenchman.
VVin.
Me she has Married, but no Frenchman. The right VVinlove, Son
to the right VVinlove is her Husband, and your Son in-Law.
Saun.
S'breed Sir, ye act twa parts, ye were but a Hamp-dresser in the
last Act, Sir.
Snatch.
'Tis time for us to be going, I feel one Ear going off already.
Exit.
Beau.
You amaze me, Are not you the Frenchman, Mr. VVoodall prefer'd
to teach my Daughter?
Bian.
No my Lord, he put on that Disguise to Court me, he is the true
VVinlove.
Sir Lyon.
Marry is he my Son, Sir.
VVin.
Those were but Counterfits of my making.
Wood.
Here's Patching with a Mistriss, I'm sure I am Gull'd.
Beau.
But d'ye hear Sir? Have you Married my Daughter without my
Consent.
Sir Lyon.
Come my Lord, now you must know me; I will beg both their
Pardons, and Secure her a Jointure worthy her Birth and Fortune.
VVin.
You are a Father now Indeed.
Beau.
Sir Lyonell excuse my rashness I accept your noble Proffer, you are
forgiven.
Saun.
S'breed Sir, we sal nere go to Dunner Sir, the Deel forgat and forgive
you aw, Sir.
Sir Lyon.
But where is that Rogue that would have sent me to Jayle?
I'll slit his Nose for him.
VVin.
I must beg his Pardon, for he did all for my Sake.
Sir Lyon.
Well Sir, for your Sake I Pardon him.
Beau.
Come Gentlemen all to my house, we shall there end all our
Doubts, and drownd our fears.
VVood.
Sir, I shall expect my Money back again, 'tis enough to loose my
Mistriss.
VVin.
No Faith 'tis in better hands already, you'll but fool it away,
you'll be hireing Frenchmen agen.
Wood.
Well mock on, I'll in and eat out part of it.
Beau.
Come Gentlemen.
Marg.
Husband will you not go with my Father?
Pet.
First kiss me Peg, and I will.
Marg.
What in the middle of the Street.
Pet.
What art thou Asham'd of me?
Marg.
Not so Sir, but asham'd to kiss so openly.
Pet.
Why then let's home again, Sauny lead the way.
Saun.
Gud the Deel a bit will Saundy Budge before Dunner, Sir.
Marg.
Nay I will give thee a kiss, nay pray now stay.
Pet.
So is not this well? come my sweet Peg.
-- 39 --
Bian.
Sister I hope we shall be friends now.
Marg.
I was never Foes with you.
Win.
Come fairest, all the Storms are overblown; Love hath both Wit
and Fortune of her own.
Exeunt.
John Lacey [1698], Sauny the Scott: or, the Taming of the Shrew: a comedy. As it is now acted at the Theatre-Royal. Written by J. Lacey, Servant to His Majesty. And Never before Printed (Printed and Sold by E. Whitlock [etc.], London) [word count] [S32400].
